A/N Hi guys, thanks for contiuing to read, i'm having computer issues so sorry if i dont post to often at the moment - again another smushy one, i had fun doing this... i have a few more written so please keep reading, let me know what you think
O/N I dont own CSI at ALL
Post Episode: Bite Me - Season 6 Episode 3
Sara slammed the door of the apartment shut, it was so loud it made Grissom jump. He turned to look at Sara, she had that look in her eyes like she would kill the first person she saw, unfortunately, Grissom thought that was him.
'What the hell Gil' Sara shouted at him.
Grissom was a little taken back, Sara never yelled, especially at him, it had been one of the things that made their relationship work.
'Sara, what?' Grissom asked her, he honestly had no idea what had got her so mad
'Maybe their suffocating each other! What was that about? Do you want to tell me what you were really thinking' Sara stared at him, Grissom could see anger in her eyes.
'Sara, i, i dont understand i was talking about the couple from the case, we were in their bedrooms, if you recall' Grissom answered her, he now knew why Sara was mad, in truth he was feeling suffocated, but it was nothing to with Sara.
'Really Grissom, because the way you looked at me, you were directing it at me, if you have something to say just say it, i can take it, it wouldnt be the first time' She was pacing back and forwards now. Grissom felt his heart sting when she used his last name.
'Sara, please just listen to me, i admit that I was referring to us when i said that'
Sara interrupted before Grissom had finished speaking 'See i knew it! Why cant you just say it to me?'
'Sara, just stop for a second a listen to me please, i don't want to fight with you about this' He walked over to her and took her hands, he lead her towards the lounge
'Sit down and I'll explain' he said pulling down on to the lounge, he reached up to her shoulders and started to massage them
'Sara, Its not you that's suffocating me in this relationship, its me doing it to myself, this relationship, its new to me, to have any thing so intimate, to share so much with one person' He continued to massage Sara's shoulders he could feel her relaxing under his fingers
'Sara, i'm struggling, we have to keep what we have a secret, we're both taking a big risk, and i guess i'm finding it hard. I don't find it easy to show you what i'm feeling, so when i say things sometimes i forget you care so much about what i say, but Sara, you are not suffocating me, i love being close to you, i love being so close i can feel your skin' He lent down and gently kissed the back of her neck, he felt her shudder,
'I love that when i kiss you i can feel every part of you moving' He kissed her again, this time on the top of her shoulder
'But mostly, i love you, i love having you in my life, and these feelings that i'm having, there not your fault, its something i need to deal with'
Sara turned towards him, tears in her eyes,
'Grissom, why didn't you just tell me all this before, i would have helped you, you just need to trust me enough to know that i wont run when you need me,'
Grissom looked into her eyes, everything he felt for Sara seemed to be reflected in them
'Sara, i'm sorry, i know i can trust you, i don't know what it is, i just find it so hard to say what i feel'
Sara reached up and wiped a single tear from his cheek.
'I'm sorry to Gil, i didn't mean to over react, its just we both waited so long for this, for us, i don't want anything to break us, i'm sorry that you feel like this, but if we are going to work, you have to open up to me'
Grissom leaned down and kissed Sara on her lips, they were salty from her tears
'I love you Gil' Sara whispered as she pulled slightly away from his lips
'I love you Sara always' Grissom whispered back before pulling her lips back towards his.