Christine dans Deux
An Alternate Multiverse - A Phantom of the Opera Story
Nyasia A. Maire
© 2006
DISCLAIMER: See Chapter One
Chapter Sixty-Eight – You are not Alone
The Daroga's relentless delving into the recent developments of my life takes more time than I anticipated. The questions continue through our arrival in Le Mans, our surprisingly short layover at the station and on through most of our trip to Rennes. Initially, I attempt to edit facts concerning probabilities, time travel, alternate universes and supernatural occurrences, but the man is no fool. He knows me all too well and his silence says so much more than most men's eloquence. With a sigh and a shake of my head, I slowly and cautiously tell him the entire truth. Occasionally, I find my eyes drawn to the silent, pale form of my wife and wonder if I had imagined her recent re-animation. I long for my turn to act as inquisitor.
The Persian's torrent of questions runs dry just as the dawn begins to send out tiny tendrils of light to stretch above the purple horizon and reach into the nighttime sky. We sit in silence. I cannot say it is a comfortable silence for I still do not know the cause of Christine's silent withdrawal, but at the very least, it is not a hostile one. After all, the man sitting across from me did return my beloved to me, even if it was just for a short while. I will not complain. Beggars cannot be choosers. Somehow, he brought her back to me. I held her in my arms and felt her love thoroughly invade me … her essence occupied me – body, mind and soul. Nadir had done this for me. He had brought her back just long enough for her to let me know that she loves me still.
"Oh, Christine…."
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"Having attained the ripe old age of 49, I will admit that I have never had a female as a roommate and I will be the first to admit that I never wanted to have one. Now, I find myself thrust into a situation that is even more personal than sharing a place to live … I share a body with another woman."
We sit at a small writing desk in the room we share with Christine's infant son. We look out the window of the chateau, pausing for a moment to appreciate the intense blue of the winter sky. We decided to keep a journal of our time together. I had feared it would be an impossible task, but have discovered that since Christine de Chagny is right-handed and I am left-handed, we have been able to record our individual thoughts without the other's influencing our writing.
"Strange that we are opposite-handed. Almost as if, fate consciously designed us so we could join in this way. After a moment's reflection, I suppose fate did plan this. It would have been nice if fate had informed us it intended us to be roomies, but nothing in my life has ever been easy. Why should this be any different?"
"I miss my husband and wish I could have told him what was happening to me, but I didn't really understand it myself until I (for lack of a better word) woke up in this body. I suppose the reason the transition took so long was that I fought it so hard. I thought that I was becoming Christine de Chagny and (with apologies to my hostess) really did not want to be her. The two of us have had many an intense discussion over the choices she made in her life. It seems to me that her personality is the polar opposite of mine. My grandmother would have said that she lacks gumption; my mother would have said she lacked a backbone and my feeling is that she has no guts. However, in all honesty, I must admit that her personality is a product of the time in which she lives as well as the result of losing her mother at birth and her father at the age of six. I am also quite certain that Erik's Angel of Music did not help her develop her sense of self-reliance, as he was always there to take care of her. I know, thank you Mrs. Sigmund!"
"Anyway, I've been coaching Christine in self-reliance and trying to bolster her self-confidence. I discovered very quickly that when it comes to her making a decision about something she wants, she is like a deer in headlights. She freezes and cannot choose. It seems to me the reason was fear of making a mistake, so rather than make a mistake; she would do nothing and let the nearest man make it for her. Even when she chose to marry Raoul, it wasn't really a choice. Raoul had placed her in a situation where she simply had no other alternative than to acquiesce to his demand. She is a good person and Raoul knew this, so he played upon this by offering her a choice that really was no choice at all."
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"Oh! I do want to record something that happened to me while I was still in my own body, but walking about Paris like zombie-woman. I met Sarah Bernhardt! I left the hotel one morning with the intention of exploring a few more of the bridges over La Seine. I walked along the Avenue de l'Opéra until I came to Rue de Richelieu when I found myself drawn to the Place Colette. There was a theater on that street (I later learned the name of the theater is the Comédie-Française) and just as I neared the theater a striking woman with dark, wide-set eyes and curly, dark, shoulder-length hair collided with me as she stumbled out of a side door. We ended up sitting on the sidewalk staring at one another. For a moment, we sat silent with shock and surprise, but then we both burst out laughing. We helped one another to our feet and dusted off one another's skirts. I introduced myself to her and held out my hand. She paused for a moment, staring at my outstretched hand then she took my hand and told me her name. Of all the people, Sarah Bernhardt! My mother always teased me as a child and said that I should go on the stage and perform because I was so melodramatic! She called me, "Sarah Heartburn." My mother's teasing made me curious about Sarah, so I had spent quite a bit of time in the library reading about her and now, here she was standing right in front of me! I told her that I was new to Paris and asked her the name of the theater. She told me the name and said she was preparing for the gala performance of "La Dame aux Camélias." (Otherwise known as, "Camille" in the United States.) She wanted to know if I was familiar with the story and I assured her that I knew it quite well and thought it a beautiful, but sad story. She laughed at the earnestness she saw in my face and I felt a blush rush into my cheeks. I was amazed to find this beautiful, talented and famous actress taking an interest in me! She must have noticed the fire in my cheeks and the surprise in my eyes for she laughed and snaked her arm through mine. I thought I would faint, but held on to my composure when she asked me to accompany her for luncheon. Stammering, I assured her that it would be both an honor and a pleasure to accompany her anywhere. She raised an eyebrow and cast an appraising glance my way, but must have decided that my response was sincere for she did not comment on my remark. I had to remind myself that I was a married woman. Something about this woman inspired a place other than my cheeks to burn and tingle with a fierce and sudden desire. "The Divine Sarah" truly is. I wonder if the unsubstantiated rumors I had read about were true. Did she have an affair with the artist, Louise Abbema? Being in her company and escorting her to lunch on my arm certainly caused me to form my own opinion. I will freely admit that if I had been a single woman, I would have delved more deeply into this divine woman's sexual preferences. However, I am married, am absolutely in love with my husband and am a firm believer in the sacredness of our wedding vows, I will never betray our love. Therefore, I settle for the pleasure of her company for lunch. From the looks we elicit from the male patrons, we certainly seem to make a delectable couple! I spend the meal in a pleasant haze and have no memory at all of what I ate or drank."
"After lunch, we stroll, arm-in-arm and speak of art, theater, literature, politics, architecture and anything that comes to mind. Although, I freely admit Sarah did most of the talking. Mostly, I listen. I love listening to the sound of her voice. Suddenly, I understand. Even though I find Sarah physically attractive, her voice mesmerizes me and causes the moist heat between my thighs. Her voice has the same ability, as my Erik's to take my breath away."
"Sarah decides to give me a tour of the Comédie-Française. I spend the next several hours walking about the stunning theater in the company of one of the greatest performers of the 19th Century. We part company in the late afternoon after Sarah and I exchange calling cards. She promises to send box seat tickets to her gala performance and I promise to do the same if I am lucky and chosen for a role in "Lakmé." With a hug and a kiss on both cheeks, she leaves me on the sidewalk outside the theater. The sun is low in the sky. I sigh and return to the hotel."
"My only regret of that day is that it is the last one I clearly remember before 'waking up' inside Christine de Chagny. Yet, I cannot find it within myself to regret meeting Sarah. I hope we will meet again."
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"I have thought long and hard about the reason why I am here inside Christine de Chagny. I believe I know the reason and have a plan. We must write a letter to Raoul informing him of where we are and request that he come here to discuss the future of our family. I have been able to look through Christine's memories and discovered that her earliest memories of Raoul are sweet. It seems that he was not always vicious and cruel. I plan on using those memories along with my knowledge of his illness in an attempt to resurrect the kind and gentle boy and exorcise the cruel and brutal man. I must inform Christine of my plan and hope she understands that for her own sake as well as her children, she must somehow find it within herself to forgive him before he dies. It is only in this way can he be saved. In saving Raoul, she will save herself and her children by bringing an end to the circle of hate that seems to be a legacy of the family de Chagny."
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Raoul,
I write this letter to inform you of the birth of our son. In spite of the fact that he was born early, both your son and I are well. In fact, he thrives. We received an offer of sanctuary and accepted it. We now shelter within the household of one of the most gracious men I have ever met, Monsieur le Comte Jean-Paul de Mornay. We currently dwell within his residence in Les Iffs, Bretagne … namely, le Château de Montmuran.
Please consider this letter an invitation to call upon me. I would like to introduce you to your son and will do so upon your arrival. However, you must understand that I do not intend to return with you to Paris. I can no longer tolerate your cruelty or violence upon my person. Being a devout Catholic, I am aware that the Church does not recognize civil divorce. Annulment on the other hand (and I realize the likelihood of receiving one is highly improbable) then causes our children to become illegitimate. In addition, annulment takes the Church years to process and I have heard rumors that you do not have years left to you, Raoul.
I have had much time to ponder over my life and find that I keep returning to a single question: What happened to the friend of my childhood? If I had been able to find that boy somewhere inside the man you forced me to marry, we would not be at this impasse. It is with deep regret that I must inform you that I cannot remain as your wife and will accept the censure of the Church by seeking a civil divorce. This matter is too important for me to timidly sit and accept whatever fate you decide to bring down upon my head. For whatever you decide affects not only me, but the lives of seven other people as well. Too long, I have allowed you to poison the minds of my daughters until I am but an evil stranger to them. Soon, you will depart this earth and I will remain here with the results of the havoc you have wreaked. Raoul, we MUST make amends and come to terms with one another before it is too late!
Please consider my words well. If you can find it within your heart to accept my forgiveness, perhaps you can begin to forgive yourself and find peace.
I await your reply.
Christine
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"So, Daroga, at last we come to it. How did you bring Christine back?"
"The answer is so simple that I can only believe you did not see it because you are too close to see it."
"Enough! Please? For once forsake with all the words of wisdom and just tell me. You must realize how much I love her?"
"Yes, Erik, I do. I do not mean to torment you. I just find myself in an unusual position of knowing something that you do not. No, do not lose your temper! Here is the answer … she is mesmerized and I awoke her from that state. Well, that is the closest word I can find to describe what she has unknowingly done to herself. Yes, look at her, Erik. You of all people should recognize the signs. She placed herself into a hypnotic state and projected her mind elsewhere. Where she is now, I have no idea. Although, I have my suspicions."
"She's with Christine, isn't she?"
"I believe so."
"Then it seems that we are headed in the right direction as the former Christine Daae's current residence is le Château de Montmuran."
"Well, we can only hope."
"Hope? Why?"
"Your wife may not be ready to return to her body or more importantly, she may feel that Christine still requires her presence. We shall see."
I feel hopeful and hollow at the same time. Raising my hand, I caress my wife's cheek. Thankfully, with her eyes closed, she appears asleep.
"Soon, my beloved. Soon …." I whisper.
Author's Note: Historical facts – Sarah Bernhardt was a member of the acting troupe of the Comédie-Française. In 1880, she played the role of Marguerite in "La Dame aux Camélias." She left the troupe in 1880 – a year prior to the date of this story. Sorry! Simply took a little artistic license with the timeframe! It was just too close to let it pass. The rumor of a lesbian affair between "The Divine Sarah" and the artist, Louise Abbema is true, but unsubstantiated. I am quite certain that Sarah wouldn't mind a little drama all for the sake of the story! The theater that Christine keeps finding herself drawn to was renamed, "The Sarah Bernhardt Theater" in the 1920's.