As spring grew near Ben began to feel colder. He befriended a few trainees that were a couple of years younger than him; young men who had waded into puberty and looked up to nephew of their teacher like he could do no wrong.
They heard the sounds in The Force too. They heard them guiding them to Ben.
Ailsa was unaware of this. She knew nothing of Snoke; the voice that now had a name. She did not know that he had been speaking to Ben since he was a new trainee at the Jedi Temple. She did not know how close he drew to the shadows as they called out, did not realize he was pulling away from all else.
She was the last thing he seemed to be holding to; that final spot of sunshine. He had never stayed beside her, never been there at the start of the ady. Yet the temptation was strong; the draw to the light when experiencing the power of darkness was hard. She was warm to the touch, warm to the heart. He loved her. He loved her and he knew such a thing would ruin his path to power – just as it had for Vader.
Vader. Ben's interest in his grandfather grew with every passing year. The voice of Snoke prodded the interest, poking it like one would poke a flame to get it to rise up and burn hotter. Vader. Not Anakin.
Ailsa had no qualms about love. The Skylanders often took spouses, often had partners throughout the universe. Their connection to The Force encouraged an experience with all emotion; heightening affection, but also illuminating the pain of anger and betrayal.
The young woman was watching Ben and his new young troop of followers training. Luke had given his nephew the task of teaching the trainees weaponed combat. He would help them find the lightsaber that suited them most, and assist them when it came to practicing the task of making their own. The youths would have to find their own Kyber Crystals when they became Jedi. They would have to make their own saber. The trials themselves had faded; there were too few to test them yet, too little instruction. Luke would guide them and he knew when they were ready. He had a gift for teaching, even when overwhelmed by the Academy itself.
Ailsa crossed her legs as she sat upon a stone and continued to watch the training. The sun was out, the snow glistening. It felt like home; it felt like Skye. Ben glanced over at her and smiled, then frowned, his attention moving back to the boys and their task.
Little Maz made herself known beside the Skylander, climbing onto the rock beside the brunette and sitting without a word. She peered at the girl through her glasses, adjusting the lenses.
"You know it is very unnerving when you do that?" Ailsa's crooked smile made an appearance. "What are you looking for?"
"Not for – at. I am looking at you." Maz fiddled with her glasses even further, peering into the grey eyes of the other before leaning back and returning her gaze to normal.
"What did you look at?"
"That love-struck puppy face you think you hide so well?"
Ailsa coughed. Eyes wide, brows up. "What?"
"Oh, come now. He wears the same look." Maz tapped her walking stick against her foot, dislodging a chunk of snow. "I also saw you sneaking out of his room at an ungodly hour of the morning. You should be more careful than that."
The girl's mouth opened, hung open, then closed. "You cannot tell Master Luke."
"I have no intention of telling Skywalker. It is none of his business."
"He would argue otherwise."
"He knew that this might happen when he brought you here. He was a young man once too. He was no puritain."
Ailsa had to smile and shake her head a little. "I do not know what to say."
"The fact that you did not ask 'is it wrong?' or 'what should I do?' is comforting."
"Comforting?"
"Of course. You don't feel like you're doing wrong, do you?"
"Well – no. I know that it is not in the way of the Jedi though. It is not part of the path."
"Paths change. Better routes can be found. Just look at your own people."
"You think that this is a better route?"
"I did not say that. I will say, however, that all must walk a different pattern."
Ailsa nodded, not sure what else to say. It was a bit awkward to be found out. She and Ben had not spoken on specifics; it had all just slipped into place, all the talking, all the trust – their intimacy had been solidified so firmly as friends and companions that everything that came after just stemmed from that.
"You love him." Maz said, her tone suddenly growing a bit more serious, her brow furrowing. "He loves you too."
"Is that…bad?"
"I do not know yet." The little woman tapped at the rock as she stared intensively at Ben. "Guard your heart, Ailsa. Guard it well – even from him."
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
The more time passed, the more responsibilities Luke gave to Ailsa. He saw her guiding the girls through the more 'sensitive' topics that he could not approach with her delicacy. Topics of adolescence and development. Both he and Ben would be notably abscent whenever such talk came up and it was a relief to have a female guide.
On all other topics the boys and girls were treated the same. All species, all genders, all ages – they were all expected to reach the same outcome. They were all expected to become Jedi and bring balance to The Force.
Luke was very present whenever Ailsa spoke on balance; he knew she worked in shades of grey. She was not evil nor dark, but she walked a tightrope between two worlds and could tip either way with ease.
Skywalker himself began to train Ailsa with her lightsabers, examining the pair closely and even trying to pull them apart to look at the Kyber Crystals within. He had never seen twin crystals, nor heard of any trainee finding them.
"I'll be honest – the crystals I found when we were sent on our trials…they were not these."
Luke looked up at his student, their figures across the table from one another. "Where are they from?"
"I was given them as a gift by my mentor on Skye. He was an old man who never gave us his name. He collected Crystals and…on our trial I saved his son. It was a 'thank you'."
"His…son?" Luke raised an eyebrow.
"Yes. His son. It is not unusual for the Force Users on Skye to have families."
"Hm." Skywalker turned his attention back to the lightsabers, knowing that entering such a topic with Ailsa would not reach any mutual resolution. "You saved the boy?"
"Yes. We were climbing a cliff-face together. He slipped, hit the rock, and broke his shoulder. We were attached by rope and he was far heavier than I…his force tore me from the wall too and we ended up sliding quite a way. I managed to hook our rope on a boulder on the way down. Stupid boy. He whined the whole time we sat there. He whined could not use The Force to reach out to his father for help. I had to do it for him. I think the Crystals were a 'thank you' and a 'please don't say anything about how incompetent my boy is' gift."
Skywalker laughed and felt the weight of the pair of weapons in his hands. They had a nice balance to them, and a lightness that suited the girl. She was not strong, she was not built for head on combat. But she was balanced and quick and her lightsabers were too.
"The Force must have known you needed a pair such as these." Luke glanced across the table. "Twin crystals are rare indeed."
"So are incompetent boys on Skye. I am lucky to have stumbled upon both…"
Luke laughed again and set the weapons down, his smile warm for Ailsa and his eyes bright. He was glad for the girl. Yet, perhaps he would not be in coming weeks. She disguised Ben's slide to the Dark Side. She helped him appear bright; and all she saw was brightness. No one noticed over her, no one looked past his smile when they were side by side. It made it so much easier.
It made his shadows longer.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
It came quietly, the whispers. They found her as they had the first time sitting there against Ben's back. The voice, the sound, the murmurings through The Force. Ailsa felt it on one side of her form, the other side warm with light and deaf to sound.
In her dreams she could see The Dark Side. She could see blackness and felt no fear of it. Yet she felt terror for another. She felt hesitation at the potential of power. Such greed never led to a good outcome.
Ailsa woke with a start, a nightmare lingering in her mind but not coming forth. Ben had experienced such things since he was but ten years old. Little strokes to desensitize him. Little tastes of what was to come. The woman looked beside her and saw an empty space. It was a bed for one but they had not been made to wander alone. On Skye they told a tale that people had been made in one body, but that the gods had been so jealous they had split them in two – forever seeking their other half.
Ailsa always believed she was at her peak alone. But peaks were good to share, and many paths were better with company. It is why Skylanders never took a vow against love. It is why they never threw off unity. It is why they travelled to see the universe and touch upon whatever and whomever they could find beauty with within The Force.
A storm built outside. The rain would wash the snow into slush. The morning would be full of ice. The thunder made the old stones of the Temple shake, the foundations seeming to quiver. For a moment the young woman thought it was the storm that woke her, but in her heart she knew it was not. It was a lure, it was temptation. It was the bliss of a quiet black sky and the horror of loneliness all at once.
Her bare feet padded through the halls, sensing out any other presence. She was silent, she was careful, and she was quiet as she found Ben at his desk with a low light and a book. He glanced up at her and smiled an exhausted smile.
"You are tired." Ailsa went to him; his arms open in an offer. Long limbs folded themselves over his lap, lithe form seeking comfort in the late-winter storm. "You look horrible."
His smile pressed to her hair, lips upon the soft scent of her scalp. She still smelled of a cold sea breeze; always like salt from the wind and damp ocean stones. Ailsa's fingers moved over his collarbone, eyes closing as she leant into Ben. The voice seemed more alluring when she was with him. And yet the loneliness of it did not dissipate.
"Why are you awake?" She peered up at her friend, her confidant, her lover. The first person she had ever grown to love fully. Perhaps the last.
"I was about to ask you the same thing." His palm settled on the curve of her waist, his mind seeking peace in her presence. Such a thing should not be done; to rely upon peace from another. It was not a balanced way to live. Other people could be swayed. Other people were not always peaceful.
"I had a dream."
"You did?"
Their words came in mumbles, in murmurs. "Yeah."
"What did you dream about?"
"I don't know, but I know I dreamed about something. Do you ever get that?"
"All the time."
"Is that why you are awake?"
Ben set the book he had been reading aside. "Yeah."
"Is it the same voice?"
He nodded against her hair, brushing dark strands back to reveal more of her pale face. Her eyes were like moons in the darkness. So large, so bright, so curious of what lay just beyond. Ben did not reply, he just kissed Ailsa. It was slow and deep – the sort of kiss that said more than words could. The sort of kiss people made when they noticed that time was running out and it was nearly the hour of goodbyes.
"If I go, would you come with me?" Ben barely moved away from her, words hitting his friend in the mouth, slipping into her like a tongue.
"Where would you go?"
"You know where I'd go."
Ailsa nodded. "I am afraid for you."
He blinked at such a reply. Dark eyes flitted up to hers, memorizing her features on the way up. "Why? You have felt it, haven't you?"
"I have. That is what I am afraid of."
"What are you afraid of?"
"It is not a path for two. It never was." She breathed against him, drawing an arm around Ben's shoulders, pressing her forehead into the line of his jaw. "The dream would not allow it. I am not part of that plan."
He knew this. He knew it so well, so acutely. Snoke would never allow such a comfort as love. Broken hearts yielded more power for The Dark Side. He had already told Ben what to do. He had already lain out a plan for Ailsa. She was to be a severed limb. She was to be removed.
"No." Ben closed his eyes. "I do not want that."
"Then do not go." Ailsa could not comprehend what was to come. She stood before a great silence; a quiet before a storm. The weather outside rumbled at them. It growled. It knew them. It knew what she did not.
Looking back Ailsa would call herself naïve. She would see why the Jedi did not condone love. Love blinded others. It made them see the best when the worst was far more important in that moment. It made danger seem less dangerous and fear less worth noting.
Ben shifted them over to where he slept. He wrapped them up in blankets like a child would when hiding from the storm. The covers were pulled above their heads, their bodies close and fully clothed. Foreheads came to touch, limbs came tangled tight. They just lay there together. It would be the first morning when they woke up side by side. They'd had to pull apart like glue, laughing sleepily before coming together again and trying to plan how to work out an inconspicuous return to duties.
Young adults and young love; it was powerful. They thought they could erase eternity or take it on.
Ailsa was late to her first class; Ben teased her upon her arrival.
"Where have you been? Did you sleep in? Absolutely lazy!"
She threw an apple core at him and watched as he caught it with The Force and hovered it above his uncle who gave his nephew a long-suffered look before making a move to send the half-eaten fruit right into the boy's chest.
It was the last time the trainees would all laugh together as a whole unit.
The next morning Ailsa found Ben beside her. She did not remember him coming in. She did not remember any dreams. All had been so silent in her mind; but it had not been so for him. He was steeling himself, and he had spent the night with one last view of her. The pain of it would drive him; he had been instructed to let it in, to let it flow through. To make him hate his Uncle for enforcing such secrecy between them, to make him jealous of any other who might look at her, to make him furious at what he had to do and embrace fully how it must be done.
Feeling her fingers brushing his hair only lit the fire brighter. Hearing the supply ship drop onto the planet with men sent by Snoke had his heart racing and his blood growing ice cold despite the heat in his heart.
He vanished then. No one knew where he went. The woods grew so quiet, the ground hard. Maz had left on a ship before and she had not known what was coming.
Luke felt a shift in The Force when she did. He watched the sky as if it might let them know what was to come.
That night the Knights of Ren were solidified. That night the children of the Academy fell and the temple burned.
A/N: As always, thank you for reading. Please feel free to leave a review. Constructive criticism is always welcome! Let me know what you liked (or didn't like) about the chapter and how you are enjoying the story so far!
There is also now a tumblr for Ailsa. It is ailsaskye . tumblr . com. Well - it is for inspiration and things to muse upon. More a think tank for me, but something you are free to enjoy too.
Thank you to all who have contacted me thus far. Your support is phenomenal and I am so grateful to know you all.
- WL.