Chapter 14
Percy.
The next day, solo therapy was different (instead of having it once a week, I was to have it every day until the interviewer arrives). Instead of Chiron, though, being in his office - there was Dionysus. He was a short, pudgy man who I believed had no business being in the psychology profession. He was brash, rude, loud, and...every other synonym.
He leered at me as I entered. "Pierce, come in. I will be the one conducting this session."
I didn't bother to correct him. "Is Chiron not here today?"
"Yes, he is here. He honestly begged me to do this. Something about you needing a new perspective. I guess he was tired of listening to you whine all day about your imaginary friend or whatever."
"I don't whine." I glowered at him, already getting agitated. "Chiron wouldn't say that."
"Yes, yes, whatever." He didn't even bother to look up at me. He only rolled his eyes and scribbled something down onto a sheet of paper. "You're already getting angry, You'll be shit at this examination." He muttered, noticing how my hands had started to shake.
I try to calm down. "I...it's not my fault. Schizophrenia comes with unstable mood swings." I only know this because of Annabeth. "I also have ADHD, you know."
"Alright, blame your illness." He said the word with heavy sarcasm, as if he didn't really believe that I had one. It didn't serve to soothe me.
I forced my hands to stop shaking, and steady my breathing. It was remarkable how this man made me this angry, and I'd just walked in. "Are you going to insult me the whole session, or are we actually gonna do some therapy?"
"I believe we have already made progress, Patrick." He gave me a shark grin. "I got you to control your temper, didn't I?"
I reluctantly notice that my hands are still, and my gaze had softened. I'd gotten so used to Dionysus that I'd stopped caring about what he was saying.
"Wow, that's great, truly remarkable work. You should have your own show. The Schizophrenia Whisperer."
He narrowed his eyes at me. "Watch yourself, Peter. Your examination therapist won't like that snark."
I raise an eyebrow at him."Maybe they'll think I'm a normal kid, that defies authority and shit."
"Maybe, they'll think that you're a self-obsessed prick who thinks that the world owes him everything, just because he's been diagnosed with something." Dionysus' voice rises slightly as he speaks.
"Schizophrenia is a real illness! What, did you expect me to be batshit psycho? Did you want me to be a vegetable?" I protest.
"I want you to know what you're going to do with your life." He gave me a steady look. "You've never done anything at all to better yourself. All you do is leech off of other people AND-" He glares when he sees I'm about to interrupt. "AND- you act like there are extenuating circumstances that allow you to do whatever you want."
"My whole life is a nightmare." I counter, "I will never know what it means to be a stable person. It's like my mind is fighting with my will every single day. It's like there are a thousand little voices and I don't know which ones are fake and which are real. I don't know which to trust or believe and you're saying, you're saying I've never sacrificed anything?"
"There goes the temper."
"Jesus Christ. Are you even listening to me right now?" I ask, annoyed.
"Honestly, Johnson, I have no idea why I agreed to talk to you today. You're just another one of those spoilt brats that thinks life owes them just because they ended up here. None of you little shitheads know that you're here because we are trying to help you. You're father is paying thousands for you to be here right now."
"Bullshit. I tried to kill the idiot." I snort.
"I am, of course, Peter, talking about the father you didn't attempt assassination on. Your real father. Someone had to pay for this treatment. This is not a run off the mill hospital. It's experimental, and costs money."
"I thought it was government run."
Dionysus gave me another look of contempt, or maybe that was just his face. "You teenagers. You always think you know everything. Surprise, surprise, Pablo - there are things your brain can't comprehend."
The anger drained from my system, leaving me defenseless. Mr. D (I refused to believe his Phd was real and call him Dr.D) could think anything he wanted about me, as long as I could get out of here.
"Look," I start. "Aren't we supposed to be getting ready for the interview or whatever?"
"Yes, Janderson. You are supposed to be reviewing these pointless questions."
I resisted the urge to point out that Janderson was nowhere close to Jackson. "Well, aren't you going to help me?"
Mr. D sighed, as if that was the last thing he wanted to do. "Yes, Peep. I am required to go over these questions with you."
"Okay, now you're just making up bird noises."
"I've no idea what you're talking about, Chirp-"
"That one didn't even start with a P!"
"-no idea at all. Let's start with the first question."
…
By the end of the session, I felt, if not totally, I was adequately prepared for the interview. Mr. D's brash nature was able to reveal what Chiron, and even Annabeth, could not: that I wanted to be a marine biologist.
It's not as if I didn't want to tell them, but I felt like I would just fail at it anyways, and not wanting a profession was better than not achieving one. The job seemed so important, that, it made no sense that someone like me would be seen doing it. Mr. D though, he started hounding me so hard, about how lazy I am, and how I'd never have a future - that I felt that I had to tell him to prove a point. To prove that I am capable.
I guess, if someone else belittles you, you kinda have to come rescue for yourself. As opposed to you belittling yourself - then there's no one to rescue you.
I wouldn't call Mr. D a doctor, but he did help me figure out my life a little so...I respected him a little more.
…
Annabeth.
Today was a bad day. I felt heavier to lift somehow. Getting myself out of bed was hard. At breakfast, Thalia led the conversation. Nods and shakes of my head was the only input in talking that I had.
At group therapy, I am a little more noticed. Piper pat the floor next to her, indicating for me to sit between her and Thalia. Rachel smiled at me. Leo called me a bitch. I try to smile back, but it comes out a grimace.
Preparing has kept Percy away from group sessions, rendering me with no one that makes funny faces at me from across the room, trying to make me smile. Of course, I never did, but the effort was always appreciated.
He has not mentioned our kiss yet - we've played it off as a spur of the moment decision. But, though I can not love him, I like him. Maybe I need him. I don't, I met him a month ago – but it's a nice thought.
After group therapy, as I was heading back to my room, I saw Chiron's office hanging open. I continued to walk until I heard his phone - and old landline on his desk- that started to play a voicemail out loud. The caller ID made me halt, and interested, I listened to the rest of the message.
-call from Olympus Hospital to Chiron Brunner. We're calling to remind you that a representative from our staff is coming over tomorrow to assess your patients of eighteen years and older. We'd appreciate-
"Annabeth?" Piper's voice called out to me from behind. "Why'd you stop walking?" She caught up to me and looked in the office quizzically as the message finished.
"Oh, I just heard someone calling and leaving a voicemail in Chiron's office." I said dismissively, hoping she wouldn't push.
"Voicemail? Who uses voicemail anymore?" Piper asked, as we started to walk down the hall again. "As a matter of fact, who even calls people anymore? Can't they just text Chiron?"
I shrugged and nodded where appropriate, relieved when Piper dropped the issue but not willing to listen to her rant.
"What are you doing right now? Are you going to the art room?"
I cringed at the thought of doing anything social. "I'm going to sleep."
"It's twelve in the afternoon, Annabeth." She replied, her mouth curling into a suspicious smile.
"And…?"
"And, so, I'm going to give you a makeover." Without me noticing, we had both ended up in front of her door.
"No thanks." I turned away, but Piper's bony hands grab my wrist, her grip unbelievably strong for someone her size.
She opens the door and drags me in. My fight goes out of me as I see how many people are in the room - some of which I don't know.
"Is this an intervention? Did you set me up?"
"Well, look at you Annabeth - we had to. You're not even trying." Thalia says, from across the crowded room. Murmurs of agreement echo around the room, and Leo chimes in with an "AMEN HONEY."
Even though looking at myself (today I am wearing a giant black hoodie and grey sweatpants, which was an improvement from the usual pyjama pants - my hair hadn't been combed in days) I could see they were right, their disapproval disappointed me. This obviously was an intervention - even in a mental hospital I was the weird one.
A quiet voice spoke up from behind me, causing me to jump. "They aren't really serious; we do this for every new patient once we get to know them- it's kind of a ritual." Rachel explains, without looking at me.
"Honey, get out of those hideous clothes." Hazel speaks up from the bed. Piper hands me a sundress, leggings, and heels and sends me into the closet to change. I start to dread this idea more and more. I think of a hundred different ways this could fall apart, all of them being my fault.
Girls (and Leo, who's surprisingly good at eyeshadow) swarm me from all over when I came out, oohing and aahing at how I looked. The only thing I could think was that I was cold without my sweater, but I let them have their way with me. For half an hour my hair was pulled and my face was powdered.
Though they tried to make small talk with me and introduce me to their friends of different groups, I was zoned out.
They're just being nice, Annabeth. Why don't you smile, Annabeth?
I try to smile. Drew gives me a strange look, so I stop. Finally, Piper dabbed my face with 'finishing touches', and a girl named Macey put a mirror up so I can see.
They must pity you.
A single tear escapes from my eyes. My throat is tight, and all I can think about is how not happy I am. Even in this situation where I should be happy. These people, they're trying to be nice. They're trying to be my friends.
I should be happy.
Piper waits for my approval, a smile stuck on her face. "Um…it's…" My voice cracks, my crying has become more apparent. "Sorry." I stand up to leave. No one calls me back.
I forget about warning Percy about his interview and become content to mope and regather myself in my own room.
I stay in there too long.
I'm sorry I didn't post. The truth is, I wrote this chapter and rewrote it a long time ago, and I hated the voice so much. I did my best to fix it but...definitely not my best.
Next chapters the climax though so yay!