"No"
"Oh come on man, it'll be fun!"
"...no"
"Please."
"No"
"Why?"
"Its unnecessary, unhygenic, uncouth and most of all unimportant."
"Wow such use of alliteration, your elementary school teacher would be proud...by the way we should stop somewhere now, I really need to take a shower"
"Its only been 10 hours since we left the town moron and its assonance not alliteration, your elementary school teacher would be sighing in disappointment and embarrassment."
"Tch you wish, Iruka sensei loved me and I haven't taken a shower since we left Konoha." I turned to face him
"Why on earth did you not take a shower at the shop?"
"I only had time to brush my teeth before the girls started on my makeover and the second time I was too busy destroying a hideout and planting evidence to take a shower jerk!" I sighed before pulling up in front of a hotel.
"Look into that green bag in the back seat and grab a wig and some colour contacts." he did as was told and pulled out a red wig and some red contacts, he then looked in the mirror and wolf whistled
"Damn I look like my brother!"
"No you look like kyuubi no kitsune."
"Yeah, he's my brother and how on earth do you know him?"
"You look nothing like each other and he's a regular at the akatsuki base."
"He was adopted and what do you mean by 'regular' and why were you in the akatsuki base?"
"Ah, makes sense now and I mean that he spends so much time there he might as well just join the group. I used to be a member."
"Oh, now enough gossip lets work on changing your look." I sighed before reaching in the bag and grabbing a random wig. I then put it on and started working on applying the brown contacts without incident. Uzumaki snickered
"Nice hair Uchiha." I quickly looked into the rear view mirror and smirked.
"I know." I then took the rubber bracelet I was wearing and tied my now shoulder length blue hair into a high ponytail.
"So who are we now?" Uzumaki grinned
"Well I am a famous actor and you are my gender confused brother." I facepalmed, why on earth did I even ask him? Although the actor part was a pretty good idea.
"Tch, fine I am an aspiring new model and you are my idiot agent who doesn't even know half of what he is doing." Uzumaki smirked
" If I am such a terrible agent then why did you hire me?" I shrugged
" You were the cheapest one." immediately the smirk vanished from his face and he burst out laughing. Seriously can't this guy just take an insult like a sane person for once?
"Moron." I then took the bag with my clothes in and stepped out of the car, Uzumaki following closely behind while trying to subdue his laugh.
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"Welcome to Sanchou hotel." the receptionist greeted us brightly and Uzumaki grinned back at her while I simply nodded.
"Thank you mam, we need a room with two single beds. How much will that be miss Sakuyi?" the lady blushed as Uzumaki whispered her name and I resisted the urge to scowl because apparently kind, caring people don't scowl...what a bunch of losers.
"That would be 144000 yen per night, how long will you be staying?" Uzumaki turned to face me
"How long should we stay...Hinata?" I glared.
"Beats me Karin, as long as I get to properly see this town before we leave i'm good."
"Very well then we shall stay two nights miss Sakuyi ." she smiled before handing Uzumaki some papers
"That will be 288000 yen, if you could sign here and here." she pointed to some places on the paper and Uzumaki signed them. I peaked over to see what he signed and was pleased to find that he find not put his real signature there. We paid and then headed up the stairs to where our room was, on the 12th floor.
"Did you really have to name me after your dead girlfriend?" Uzumaki said while scowling.
"You named me after a woman too idiot"
"Well at least she ain't dead! Besides that woman and her cousin are geniuses, you should be proud."
"Karin was a very high ranking shareholder in the stockmarket so we're even."
"...I hate you."
"And again we're even."
We finally stopped in front of room 789 and immediately after I opened the door Uzumaki pushed passed me and ran inside.
"Woohoo! Time for some one on one time with me and the shower!" Uzumaki exclaimed as he threw his duffel bag on the floor and sprinted towards the bathroom. I sighed and closed the door before sitting down on one of the beds. As I sat down I was overcome with a great deal of fatigue, who knew I was this tired and I only drove for two hours!
My eyes widened in realisation and I hurried towards the bathroom to see the shower running and Uzumaki passed out, naked on the floor. I felt my face heat up and did not need to look in the mirror to know what was happening...damn you Uzumaki.
I switched the shower off and attempted to haul Uzumaki off the floor and over my shoulder but I missed one simple detail.
"Man what the hell are you eating? How can someone be so skinny and so heavy at the same time?"
As you see that was a bust so I simply resorted to dragging him back into the bedroom. I then used the power of my greatness to haul him onto the bed and then a new problem arose. Did Uzumaki sleep in the nude or with clothes on? Deciding to be on the safe side I searched his duffel bag for a pair of boxers and started slowly dressing him, careful to avoid any contact with his crotch.
Finally after a great deal of blood rushing towards my face and another body part I shall not mention I had successfully tucked him in and was currently taking off my sweater and jeans. Sadly the moment my head touched the pillow my world faded to black.
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I awoke to the sound of the shower going off and before I could comprehend what was happening the bathroom door opened and Uzumaki, now dressed in a towel walked out. I yawned and he turned towards me, eyes wide and I snorted.
"What?"
He shrugged
"Didn't know you were awake, that's all."
I nodded before getting out of the bed and walking towards the bathroom when
"Hey Uchiha."
I stopped and turned
"Hmm?"
He smirked
"Thanks."
I kept on walking
"No problem."
And just like that the subject was dropped.
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I stepped into the shower and thought about everything that has been happening from that bar that started all this mess to meeting Uzumaki and mini me also known as Sai to the ladies back in Bazuka town. Who knew that all it took was one writers block and I would be on the run, my reputation ruined and an ex cop as my only accomplice. This just proves that life can be very unexpected at times. I smiled to myself in memory of all the factors that have played a part in where I am right now. I smirked in anticipation to where this road will take me as I stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel.
I walked back in the room to find Uzumaki now fully dressed in some blue jeans and a very familiar dress shirt, sitting on his bed and polishing his gun. I glared
"Uzumaki!"
"What?"
"...would you mind explaining why you are currently wearing my shirt and my shoes?"
"I'm your agent and an agent does not wear polo t-shirts and converse sneakers or at least I think they don't." I scowled before stalking over to his bag and taking a long sleeved blue vest and a pair of sneakers. I then began to change, all the while Uzumaki kept on polishing his gun.
"Hey Uchiha."
"What now?"
"So about the club-"
"I said no."
"tch fine, be like that anyway lets go eat i'm starving!" I rolled my eyes before grabbing the room key and my wallet and making my way towards the door.
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We waved the receptionist goodbye as we walked out and headed for what looked like a restaurant a few shops away.
It was already night time as it seems we spent the entire afternoon sleeping. There were quite a lot of people wandering around and I figured the place had a lot of bars and clubs, looks like Uzumaki knew this place..that would explain why he keeps pestering me about going to one.
I turned to look at said man and only met a brick wall. Tch figures the blond just had to rush. I scoffed before walking at a slightly faster pace towards the place than before.
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"Evening sir, table for one?" a white haired waiter asked as I walked through the golden doors.
"Hn, have you seen a man about my height, red hair red eyes...wearing a suit that clearly looks terrible on him?" the waiter sweat dropped
"Uh yes although I think the suit looks quite fine on him." I glared at the man and he quickly turned around shivering. I smirked at that, looks like Uzumaki is still the only one un fazed by the glare.
"Of course sir please follow me." I had to give the guy credit for not losing his composure, he could have been a great politician, or a terrorist.
As we walked past the restaurant I turned to admire the decor. The restaurant had about three floors, the first floor was just like a traditional japanese restaurant, quiet but cosy, the chairs were rather low as to look like mats and the waiters were all dressed in traditional kimonos, the waitresses dressed as geisha.
"Ah yes that floor was level one, for the less rich, your friend is on the third floor." The waiter said as we climbed past the second floor, a sushi bar and onto the third floor. We reached a large room which was decorated as a very costly western restaurant, like that one I went to while visiting England a few years ago. The tables were all decorated in gold and silver, I could tell that most people here were very rich judging by the number of bodyguards in the room. I scoffed but followed the man in towards where I could see Uzumaki sipping on a glass of wine while conversing with a blond waitress.
"Suzaki, table four is waiting to be served and here we are sir." I sat down opposite Uzumaki as the waitress hurried off.
"Here are your menus, I will be back in a few minutes to take your orders." the waiter then walked away and I turned to glare at Uzumaki.
"Why did you bring me here?"
"Well I thought you might like it being the high class bastard you are." he answered without skipping a heartbeat. My glare hardened
"I hate it." he growled
"Well sorry if I couldn't get a higher class sir."
"No you idiot, I mean that I hate these types of restaurants." he looked at me in confusion
"Why?"
"Look around moron, this place is full of politicians, feudal lords and trophy wives. Its no longer about the food, its about status."
"Uh so what are you trying to say?" he said as he drank some more of his wine
"I prefer level one." and promptly choked as it went down the wrong pipe
"Sirs, are you ready to- dude are you ok?" I turned to waiter who was now slapping Uzumaki on the back while said said Uzumaki continued to choke. I chuckled lightly at the scene while everyone else continued to mind their own business.
"Tch figures none of these people would help, probably too busy doing nothing."
"Hey you weren't helping as well bastard." as so the waiter was finally able to stop the choking, what a shame.
"So sirs are you ready to order?" I turned towards the man
"Ah yes, we would like to go back to the ground floor."
"What! But I already-"
"I'll pay you back Karin! Now as I was saying."
"Of course sir but if i may ask why?"
"...I don't like this floor." the waiter nodded in understanding
"Ah, too full of fake posers right? Follow me" I smirked as I stood up followed by a seething Uzumaki. I wonder what is up with him today, he is being more cranky than usual and that only happens when...oh.
"Hmm waiter, take us to the smoking zone if you have one." the waiter nodded and Uzumaki finally stopped seething.
We finally reached the ground floor or level one as these people call it. The waiter took us to a booth with two mats and a low table in between. We took off our shoes before kneeling down on the mats and looking at the menus provided. The waiter excused himself again and Uzumaki took out a cigarette and lit it, I grimaced but stopped myself from grabbing the offending object from between his lips.
"Hey Uchiha not that i'm ungrateful or anything but why are you allowing me to smoke within 10 meters of you?" I looked up at the ceiling
"You looked like you were about to grab the nearest thing and go on a killing spree, I did it for my own sanity." he nodded slowly and the waiter finally came back
"Sirs are you ready to order now." I nodded towards Uzumaki
" I will have the miso ramen and some sake."
"I will have the tempura roll with tomato juice." the waiter bowed before walking off
"Seriously man tomato juice?" I glared at him
"Says the guy ordering ramen in a restaurant." it was Uzumaki's turn to glare now and I smirked in victory, that is until I saw a familiar look on his face. He then proceeded to take a long drag of his cigarette-
"Uzumaki if you even think of-" and blew it right in my face. I coughed for a while before snatching the offending object and putting it out in the ashtray provided.
I then hauled Uzumaki halfway over the table and giving him my most deadliest glare
"I thought we agreed that you were to never ever do that again Uzumaki." I seethed and Uzumaki was about make a comeback when he looked over my shoulder and smiled
"Oh Hinata I didn't know that you felt that way but you do know that I would never leave you for that blonde waitress, I was just passing time now please let go of me." I stared at him in confusion before letting go of his shirt and turning around to see a few people including our waiter openly staring at us.
"Don't you people have anything better to do?" and just like that everyone carried on with their business. The waiter put down our orders before leaving again
"...when we reach the hotel I am going to murder you with your own bloody gun Uzumaki."
"Looking forward to that Uchiha."
There was a brief moment of silence before we both burst out laughing, attracting more stares this time.
The rest of the meal was spent rather peacefully. We then paid for out meal and left the place.
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As we walked down the street towards an unknown destination my mind began to wonder off to back in the hotel room. What exactly do I feel for my idiotic partner in crime? Love? lust? hate? tolerance? A quickly glanced at the man who was busy chewing on some gum.
"Hey Uzumaki, lets go back to the hotel."
"But what about-"
"Now." he mumbled something about prissy, bossy pale bastards but turned around nonetheless, leaving me back to my thoughts.
Now I am not a post-pubescent teenager nor am I a lovesick fool so I wasn't worried about what Uzumaki's answer will be. The real question was what do I feel for him. I was very disturbed about my current predicament but as we neared the hotel I decided to follow my instincts instead of my logic for once and besides, if I don't get the answer I want then I could just shoot him in the head I mean really what do I have to lose?
I opened the room door and walked towards my bag. Once there I pulled out sharingan (1) and set it under my pillow.
"Uzumaki come over here for a second." said man turned away from whatever he was watching and walked towards my bed.
"So you gonna tell me what was the whole U turn about princess?" I silently seethed at the 'princess' comment but kept my composure.
"It has recently come to my attention that I may have some sort of twisted attraction to you and since I do not like keeping unnecessary burdens I have decided to tell you...you may leave now." I watched in amusement as his eyes widened to a point where they threatened to roll out of his skull.
"You're screwin with me right?" I sighed and slowly reached for my gun. Well its been fun I guess
"Do I look like a joker to you?" he chuckled lightly
"Well I wasn't expecting that but...sure lets date." my hand paused on its way to its destination
"What?"
"Well I am man enough to admit that you are hot-" I glared at that
"Plus the fact that I guess you get me more than most people do, never mind the fact that I don't have to worry about jealousy or defending your 'honour' or something like that."
"That doesn't even make sense moron and I thought you were straight."
"First of all it wasn't supposed to make sense and secondly I am a free man who has the ability to change sexuality at any given time. Besides just because I am dating another man does not mean I can't appreciate the female human body nor does it mean that I will suddenly turn female." I couldn't believe I was attracted to this.
"Whatever you say idiot." I said as I took off my shoes and climbed onto the bed, making sure to remove the gun before lying on the pillow
"Hey Uchiha since we are like together now does that mean I have to hold your hand in public and take you out on dates and all that jazz?"
"..do that and chidori (2) will be saying hello to your vital organs."
"Hehe I was just playing, hey what about the club?"
"Tomorrow, I want to sleep now." I said and Uzumaki laughed
"Goodnight princess."
"Up yours pheasant."
[{END FL SHBACK}]
Kiba scratched the bridge of his nose
"hmm the story is beginning to make sense now." Sasuke nodded
"Good to hear child."
"So when are you gonna tell me about what really happened at the club and how the murder of-"
"Patience child, patience. So the next day we-"
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Z/N: wow long time, real life issues happened but I am back now and I will try to update every monday! Hopefully.
Anyway as you can see, this story is under the categories "crime" and "drama" not "romance" and "fluff" so there won't be much crying in each others arms and embracing their love. Both characters are fully fledged men, not women in men's bodies and remember ITS NOT SHOUNEN AI IF ONE OF THEM IS ACTING LIKE A FEMALE Just to clear that up. Thanks for reading! Constructive criticism is welcome, flaming is not.
Disclaimer: yes I do own Naruto, which is why I am currently writing fanfiction about it.
(1) Sasuke's guns name
(2) Sasuke's swords name