Here's the latest. I hope you enjoy.
"You wanna tell me what the hell that was about Bonnie?" Damon asked as he took residence in Kai's previous seat.
I gave him a quizzical look. "Why do you care?" I questioned.
"Because we care about you Bonnie!" Jeremy yelped. His voice was annoyingly loud and it grabbed the attention of everybody in the Grill. "Hey Bon...?" Matt started as he came to the bar in the proper Mystic Falls Grill uniform. His voice got quiet as he realized the atmosphere in the restaurant had changed. It was once a family hangout and just as quickly, turned into an angst party of two in the matter of seconds.
I took in Jeremy's features. His cheeks were bright red and his fists were clenched-hard. Like he wanted to hit something. "Bonnie is everything okay?" Matt asked while leaning over the bar counter. I took a minute and asked myself the same question. Was everything okay? Well no, for one I feel like shit. Everything is irrevocably fucked up and there's nothing I could do about it. And that was the shittiest thing about it. I had zero control over anything. Not a damn thing. I couldn't take back those months I spent suffering with the eerie feeling of despair and loneliness crawling up my back. Kai couldn't take back torturing me and I couldn't take back those bittersweet months with Damon either. I was in a rut. I was stuck.
I shook my head and plastered on a fake smile. "Everything is fucking peachy," I said with the highest level of sarcasm. Matt grabbed my arm across the counter and gave me a condescending squeeze. "My shift ends at 9. Is it okay if I come over again?" I gave him a genuine smile. "Of course you can."
"Do you mind if I joined your little slumber party too?" Damon asked sarcastically. "See you later Matty," I said as I leaned across the counter and planted a light kiss on his cheek.
You know, I'm trying to be mature now. I'm in my early 20's and I've been through a lot. But in all honesty, when Matt asked me if 'everything was okay' I wanted to scream. I wanted to throw a tantrum. I wanted to curse those three vampires and the previous vampire hunter out in ten different languages. It took everything in my power to not go off on any if them, especially in a public place, and when I managed to do that and walk out of the Grill without touching any of them, I gave myself a pat on the back. Kudos to you Bonnie for keeping your cool. But that shit ended when Elena, the special damsel in distress vamp sped right in front of me after I took two steps away from the restaurant.
"Bonnie," she began. I sighed loudly. "What do you want?" Elena sighed in response as her rosy cheeks turned rosier. My ex best friend was gorgeous- I never would discredit her beauty. But seeing her now, after all the things I've been through, I wondered to myself 'was she really worth it?' I know what you're thinking, and I know I sound stupid and hypocritical because I literally died for her but was she really worth it? If Elena would've died, a lot of things would have never happened. I wouldn't have ever died and neither would have Jeremy. So many horrible things wouldn't have ever happened if Elena would have just ceased to exist. I sound kind of sadistic, I know, but I'm being realistic. As I looked at Elena Gilbert today I realized how my life would've turned out. It probably wouldn't have been as shitty as it was now, and it was because of this one girl, this one doppelgänger, that turned my life upside down.
"You know you turned my life into shit, right?" I asked rhetorically before she even had a chance to speak.
"Wha-" a confused look graced upon her face. "What do you mean?"
"I mean..if you would've died on that bridge, none of this would've happened." Elena's face twisted into sadness after heating my response. "Bonnie…how could you say that," she croaked.
"My life for the past five years has been about you." I said through gritted teeth. "We need you to do a spell to protect Elena. We need you to take down a thousand year old vampire for Elena. Everything is always about you!" I wailed. "And the one time I need someone to save me, nobody comes! But you Elena, you have the world at your feet. You have people who would die for you, kill for you. Who do I have? Nobody." Elena's body was frigid and she didn't say another word. Her eyes were pooling with water and a single tear escaped her eye and rolled down across her cheek. I can admit what I said was pretty harsh, but I didn't care. I didn't feel the pang of remorse of guilt which was satisfying and terrifying at the same time. I said those things just to get a rise out of her and when I said it, I felt great. I meant every single word I said and the more I relished in my bitchy interior, the better I'd do at hiding the pain I felt. But in all honesty, I liked the new me, and for the time being, she wasn't going anywhere.
Xxxxxxxx
The walk back home was tense. After I left a crying Elena in front of the Grill I was looking behind my back waiting for some homicidal vampire to snap my neck for insulting the damsel in distress. But knuckle that didn't happen. You know what did happen? I turned the corner to my house and saw a somber Stefan Salvatore. He's the only person who hasn't been hopping down my throat recently so I didn't really feel annoyed by his presence.
"Saint Stefan," I said with out a sense of humor in my tone. "What are you doing in my neck of the woods?" Stefan stood tall with his boot cut blue jeans, gray boots and cargo jacket. He sure was a looker. "I just wanted to say hello. I know you've been feeing like crap for the past couple of days." His last choice of words caught my attention. "What do you mean?" "You just came back from the dead." He deadpanned. "You must be feeling shitty." His words kind of stung, which was odd because they were all true, but nonetheless, still stung.
"Where are you going with this?" I questioned cautiously, looking into his moss green eyes. He shrugged with nonchalance. "Nowhere. I just wanna talk. I was going to wait inside your house but I can't even get past the doorstep." "Waiting inside my house? That kinda creepy. Even for you, Stefan." I chuckled. "Oooh she laughs." Stefan said with a hint of accomplishment. I'm surprised you haven't set me on fire yet."
I shook my head. He was right. Why hadn't I told him to just fuck off? I walked around Stefan and proceeded to walk to my door, but came to a stop.
"Y'know Stefan," I said as I turned around to meet his gaze again. "I don't really know why I haven't cursed you out or set you on fire yet. I think I might just hate you the least out of all of them."
"Oh really? And why is that?"
I shrugged. "Honestly I feel like I should cut you some slack. You give up everything for everybody, and what do you get? Suffering in a safe for months while your girlfriend is off starting a life with your brother. And me? I just die once or twice, and nobody really gives a shit." Stefan doesn't reply and simply nods his head. "People like you and me, Stefan, we always finish last." I said with finality as I entered my house leaving a pandering vampire outdoors.
Stefan's POV:
"You were with Bonnie today?" Not two seconds had I entered my house and Damon was bombarding me with questions. I threw my jacket unto the couch after I unwrapped it from my body. I was making a move into the kitchen while answering Damon's question with a question.
"How did you know?"
"I can smell her on you." My eyes squinted in curiosity by hearing his statement. "So what, you have her scent engraved into your senses or something?"
"No you idiot. In 1994 she had this lilac scented lotion that she'd always wear. I guess old habits die hard." I didn't reply as I looked into the empty refrigerator. "You didn't restock the blood?" I questioned with annoyance. "It was your turn." Damon said in defense. "But yeah, back to our favorite little witch. Bon Bon. So what did you two talk about?" I scoffed at my brother. "What are you, a jealous ex boyfriend?" "No," Damon answered in a strained tone."I'm a jealous ex bff, so I have the right to know." I chuckled at Damon's naivety towards Bonnie. "We didn't even really talk," I fessed up. "She didn't even let me inside her house."
Damon winced. "Damn, Bon Bon's brutal." "Yeah," I rolled my eyes. "But she hates me the least." I said with gratitude. Damon's blue eyes met mine. "What do you mean 'she hates you the least'?" I put my hands up in surrender. "Her words not mine."
I chuckled inwardly because I knew Damon was going to be put into a challenging position now with Bonnie's new attitude. It was something new to see Damon out of his comfort zone, and that's exactly where Bonnie put him. A foreign place where he didn't know how to escape.
What do you guys think? Review please, and I'm sorry about the late update.