Welcome back! I don't know about you all but I missed these stories. Two months is a long time without the long stories which is why One Shot Month will be in September this year. Short Story Month will still be in July and December. Since I didn't get around to Christmas shots in December I will probably do a Christmas themed One Shot Week at the end of June or beginning of July.
In case you didn't notice the list on my profile page got a bit longer as I was actually able to do some plotting during the break. A lot of which were requests from my wonderful readers.
Now onto tonight's story! In case you didn't go back and read the first seventeen chapters here's a quick recap:
The story began with the death of Clare and Drew's infant son. Both had trouble coping and grieved in their own way, both teetering on the edge of sanity. After months of struggle they agreed to divorce and move on with their lives.
Clare moved out into her own apartment and then found out her cancer had relapsed. When Drew found out he ripped up the divorce papers and vowed to be with her. They have now reconciled but Clare is facing a long road of treatment and just had surgery to remove a tumor.
As per usual my Tuesday was very busy and it's on the short side.
Ch. 18 Like the Petals of a Flower between the Pages of a Novel
(CLARE)
I feel tired and heavy but I hear Drew's voice calling to me, "Pretty Eyes open those gorgeous sparkling blues and look at me."
Hearing my husband's voice calling to me I try to open my eyes. They flutter and I squeeze Drew's hand holding mine. When my eyes finally open the very first thing I see, the thing my eyes focus on is my husband's grin. I try to smile back but my muscles don't want to cooperate yet. I see Adam, Paige, Mom, Glen, Audra and Omar in the room watching me.
"The surgery went great; they were able to remove the tumor without complications. It's just the first step on a long road but you came through it without complication or problem," Drew says to me.
"I'm tired," I tell them with a scratchy throat.
"You probably will be for a couple of hours," Adam says.
"The doctors should be in shortly, stay awake long enough to talk to them," Drew encourages me.
I look around the room and now I notice that Owen, Ash, Jenna, K.C. and Eli are also in the room. I smile at them and they smile back, a few come over and squeeze my hand. The people in the room begin talking softly and I almost drift to sleep again but then the doctor comes in the room. He tells me pretty much what Drew said, the surgery went well and there were no complications. He tells me a few other things about my recovery time and after care before he leaves. A few moments after the doctor leaves I fall asleep again.
When I wake up again I see Jake and Katie in the room, I say hi to them and we talk a few moments before I fall asleep again. I'm not sure if the drugs or the whole experience has me tired but either way I drift in and out of sleep all day. I wake up and talk a few moments before falling asleep again. People come and go all day as I drift in and out of consciousness but there's always at least six people in the room with me and Drew is always there. In the late afternoon I fall asleep and stay asleep a few hours before waking up at dusk and the only person in my room is Owen.
"Not that I'm not always happy to see you but where's Drew?"
"He went to get some dinner with everyone else. I said I'd stay with you but I can call him if you want."
"No let him eat, he needs to eat and he needs to get out of here sometimes. Make sure he gets out of here sometimes or he'll go crazy in here. He needs to find a job, make sure he finds a job," I request of Owen sleepily.
"We will, all of us, we'll make sure he gets out and finds a job and we'll make sure someone is always here with you," Owen assures me I give him an appreciative smile and then we're silent for a few moments.
"Owen I'm terrified," I whisper.
He comes over and takes my hand sitting on the bed, "I know Clare. Drew is terrified too and so am I we all are. I'm terrified of losing my close friend and watching one of my best friends watch his wife die. If Drew loses you I don't know that he'd make it through. We're all terrified Clare but we're all here for you and Drew and each other and giving each other strength."
"Owen I love you," I tell him with a yawn and he smiles, "as a friend," I add and he laughs.
"I love you as a friend too Clare," Owen grins and I start to fall asleep again.
I stay asleep until later that night and when I wake up there's only one person in my room but this time it's Drew. He's lying on the bed and seems to be watching me sleep.
"I love you Drew," I whisper against his chest.
"I love you too Clare," he whispers back.
"Should I be this tired?"
"The doctors said that was normal you should have more energy tomorrow. If you're tired go back to sleep I'll be with you here all night," Drew assures me.
"I can't believe I can be so tired after lying in bed all day."
"You've been through a lot and your body has been through a lot and a long surgery. You go back to sleep and I'll see you in the morning. I'll be here holding you all night," he says and kisses my forehead.
"I love you Drew, I need you more now than I ever I'm so scared," I whisper against his chest as I begin to drift to sleep again.
"I love you more than anything Clare, I always have and I always will," Drew says kissing my forehead and I smile drifting to sleep once more.
(DREW)
"Alright Clare I know you've been through this before and we've discussed the course of treatment before but do you have any questions?" Dr. Shaye asks as he sets up the chemo machine. I remember seeing the chemo machine in Clare's hospital room when she was sick the first time. I didn't know what it was for but I only saw her in the hospital a couple of times. That was before I really knew her and before we were in love.
"No I know how this goes, I feel okay during the treatment and then I get terribly sick and feel like dying after," Clare says and it breaks my heart hearing the defeat in her voice.
"Your diet and other therapies will help with that and we will be monitoring you closely. We can add other supportive therapies if necessary. Are you ready to begin Clare?"
She nods and he turns on the machine, medicine starts flowing and Clare shivers. I cover her with a blanket and get on the bed to hold her. She's been recovering from surgery for several days and begins her treatment today. She's already had radiation implants where the cancer was growing near her kidney. Tiny implants about the size of a grain of rice to release radiation near her kidney and spine to keep the cancer from growing and invading those areas. The implants are temporary and controlled and will be removed when the cancer cells have died or shrunk to a point the doctors are no longer concerned about it. Several of our friends and family will be by this evening but Clare didn't want anyone here but me during her first treatment.
"Are you okay?" I ask when the doctor leaves.
"This part isn't so bad it's later that I will fell sick and terrible and it only gets worse," she says.
"I'm here just tell me what you need," I tell her.
"Just hold me and distract me. Can you put on a movie please?"
I kiss her temple and let go of her temporarily to put on a movie. Then I get back in bed and wrap my arms around her once more. After an hour Dr. Shaye comes back in and unhooks her from the machine he asks her how she feels and tells her to rest and that someone from her care team will come in to check on her throughout the day. It's after nine now but Clare doesn't feel like eating, I am hungry however so they bring me some breakfast.
For a while things are peaceful and quiet, Clare watches another movie while I eat and then hold her in bed again. Then she suddenly pushes me away hopping out of bed and running for the washroom. I follow her to the washroom, she's kneeled on the floor hunched over the toilet and vomiting into it. I sit next to her rubbing her back, she vomits several more times, seems like she vomits everything she ate in the last three days. When she's done she tries to get up but she's sweating and shaking. She looks pale and I start to panic that something is very wrong. I pick her up and carry her back to the bed pressing the button for the floor nurse. Instead of the nurse Dr. Reddington and Dr. Sander from Clare's care team come in.
"Is she supposed to be shaking like that? And sweating like that? Should she be so pale?"
"It's side effects from the chemo as is vomiting. I know it's scary to watch but I assure you this is normal. We can give her some things to help with the nausea. Are you experiencing any pain Clare?" Dr. Sander asks.
"No just feeling ill I remember this feeling," she groans curling onto her side.
"Alright we'll give you some things to help with the symptoms and someone will come back to check on you shortly," Dr. Reddington tells us.
They leave the room and come back after a moment and have Clare swallow a few pills. She lies down again looking at the TV but not really watching, she's curled on her side and I get in the bed with her. I take her in my arms and hold her tight kissing her temple and stroking her back. After a while she stops shaking and sweating and gains a little color back. By evening when people start showing up for visits she looks like she's fine again and you'd never know she was so ill.
Adam and Paige show up first, followed quickly by Owen and Ash and Eli who will be in town another couple of weeks. Jenna and K.C. come at the same time as my parents, Jake and Katie and Clare's parents. Jake and Katie will be leaving Friday, my parents and Clare's parents will be leaving Sunday. Everyone brought something to eat and Clare says she can eat a little. I make her a small plate and she begins nibbling at it while the rest of us dig into all the good food.
"We'll be in touch every day and we'll be back if you need us Clare. Of course we'll be back to visit as often as we can," Helen tells Clare.
"The same goes for us we'll be back as often as we can and if you need us call us and we'll be here," Mom says.
"Thanks," Clare smiles.
"It will be harder for us to come back out from California but we will be in touch," Jake comments.
"It's okay I know we'll have a lot of people here to support us," Clare replies.
"And we'll be in touch and thinking of you and sending good thoughts," Katie adds.
"All good things," Clare grins.
"I'm still in town a couple weeks working on a film and I'll be here as often as I can," Eli remarks.
"That's good you can read to me like last time," Clare says.
"I have an interview tomorrow for a possible job so someone should be here with her. I'll be gone from about two to four or five," I announce.
"You didn't tell me you had a job interview," Clare remarks taking my hand.
"I didn't want to get your hopes up it's just a pre-interview."
"We'll be here with Clare," Mom tells us.
"Us too," Helen nods.
"I can probably be here by two," Adam speaks up.
Clare doesn't eat very much but she does eat; everyone who has work tomorrow leaves early to drive home. Jake, Katie and both sets of parents have rooms at the hotel and Jake and Katie are staying in my room. I've spent every night in Clare's room and that's not going to change anytime soon. Just before Clare's second treatment of the day everyone else leaves saying goodnight. Clare changes into pajamas and gets in bed, shortly after which a nurse comes in to administer the treatment. She shivers when the medicine goes into her body and I put on a movie then hold her tight. She falls asleep in my arms and the nurse comes in to turn off the machine Clare is still asleep. I fall asleep with Clare in my arms and wake up when she tries to push me away, I let go of her and she jumps out of bed but before she can run to the washroom she collapses to her knees and vomits on the floor, she vomits once and then again and again and again. When she's done she's not only shaking but she's sobbing. I press the alert button to get someone in the room and then go over to her putting my arm around her.
"I told you it would get nasty," Clare sobs trying to brush the vomit off her arms.
"It's okay, it's the side effects of the chemo," I say rubbing her back and then a nurse comes in. "She didn't exactly make it to the washroom," I explain.
"That's no problem I'll get janitorial to clean this up. It looks like you need to clean up in the shower," the nurse comments.
"Come on Pretty Eyes let's go shower I'll wash you," I tell Clare picking her up.
I carry her into the washroom, she's still sobbing and shaking and now she's sweating and looks pale again. I set her down and turn on the water and when I look back at Clare she's getting undressed. She's still shaking so I help her off with her pajamas. I get out of my boxers and pajama bottoms and bring her into the shower she gets under the water rinsing off and I pick up the body wash. When she turns around I wash her off and she rinses off again and then turns around putting her head on my chest.
"I want to fight Drew but I don't know if I can do this. I'm already feeling so sick and weak," she cries running her fingers on my chest like she's trying to grip my chest.
I wrap my arms around her and hold her close to me without hurting her, "I know Clare. I know you're tired and weak, I know you've been through so much and you have another fight. It's going to be hard, it's going to be a long road but you're not alone and when you feel like you can't fight any more you have all of us to lean on."
"I'm tired can we go to bed now?"
"Yeah," I nod letting go of her to turn off the water, "you dry off and I'll grab you another pair of pajamas."
She nods and starts drying off while I grab a towel and wrap it around my waist. I get her a new set of pajamas and panties for Clare and a pair of boxers for me. After drying off and putting the clean things on we get back into bed. She curls into me and falls asleep again after a short time. She wakes up early and when she stirs it wakes me up, I kiss her forehead and hold her until Dr. Shaye comes in to administer her morning treatment. It's a lot like last night and yesterday morning, she's very calm and lying in bed and she's okay for about an hour after the treatment and then she becomes violently ill and I follow her into the washroom. When she's done vomiting she leans against me, I hold her a moment before taking her back to the bed. She doesn't want any breakfast again but I do eat. Shortly after breakfast the parents show up with Jake and Katie and just after 1:30 I go to my room and get ready for the interview. I return to Clare's room when I'm ready to kiss Clare goodbye.
"Good luck I love you," Clare says giving me a soft kiss.
"I love you too."
Everyone else wishes me luck and Adam comes in just as I'm leaving. I get in my car and drive to the school I'm interviewing at. It's an elementary school and I go to the office, it's middle of summer but they have a summer camp here and the office is open.
"You must be Drew Torres I'm Principal Jennifer Davis," the tall woman with dark red hair says shaking my hand.
"Yeah it's nice to meet you, thanks for seeing me on such short notice," I reply with a smile.
"It was quite serendipitous actually because one of our first grad teachers had twins, she was going to stop working but she wants to stay on part time so we need someone else part time. You came highly recommended; I heard nothing but glowing reviews from your last school. I know you taught kindergarten but first grade isn't much different. It would be part time like I said Thursdays, Fridays and every other Wednesday. On the first day of school you'd be teaching together to meet the kids."
"It sounds like I already have the job I thought I'd need to interview," I say cautiously.
"Under normal circumstances you would but Alexia Lucas from your old school sent a glowing recommendation as did your old Principal. I also know what you've been through Drew, losing a child and now your wife is sick with cancer. I lost my son to cancer a few years ago. This isn't a pity job don't think that but I really don't think we could possibly find anyone better for the job."
"Thank you this is wonderful, I thought we might get to a basic interview today but knowing I have a job is a huge load off my mind. Clare, my wife will be so relieved when I tell her."
"I have some forms for you to fill out and some stuff to go over with you but Alexia sent us over a lot of stuff as well."
I spend the next half hour filling out forms and then Jennifer goes over some stuff with me. Tells me when the first meeting is I need to be at and then gives me a tour of the campus. I return to the clinic a little after 4:30 and go straight to Clare's room.
"How'd it go?" She asks. She looks a lot better, she's sitting up in her bed, Adam sits at the foot of it and she seems to be talking with everyone.
"It went great I got the job, I didn't even really have to interview I got such a great recommendation that they gave me the job. It's part time so Thursdays, Fridays and every other Wednesday switching off with a teacher that had twins."
"That's great and a relief that you have a job at least that's one thing we don't have to worry about," Clare smiles.
"Yeah and if money becomes a problem I can always get some tutoring work," I comment.
"I don't want you kids to worry about money you have enough to worry about. They're going to bring Clare dinner soon I think the rest of us should go down and get some dinner. We'll bring it back and eat together," Dad speaks up.
"We'll bring you back something Drew and give you two a few moments alone," Adam tells me as they leave.
"We don't have to worry about me getting a job anymore. I know we have a long road still but I think everything is going to be just fine," I tell Clare and give her a loving kiss.
The update next Tuesday will have more of Clare's treatments, people visiting her and maybe a different pov.