It was Day 4 of Weirdmageddon. Inside the Fearamid, the Ciphers were still celebrating Bill and Bonnie's wedding. Bonnie was currently in the tip of the Fearamid, enjoying herself in her newfound luxuries.

Some time later, Bill tapped on a gold statue with a fork. "Ladies, gentlemen, that creature with like eighty-seven different faces," he said.

"Eighty-eight different faces!" a hideous Cipher corrected.

"Whoa-ho, sorry," Bill said. "Touchy subject. Anyways, it's been fun turning Gravity Falls inside-out, rounding up all its terrified citizens, and then stacking them into this massive throne of frozen human agony." He sat on the throne. "Don't worry. They're not conscious anymore. Probably."

As if on cue, a female version of Samuel Wentworth unfroze. "Uh... My omelettes," she muttered. "They- They have friendly faces."

"Whoops," Bill said. "Hehe, back- back you go there." He nudged the woman back into place until she turned back to stone.

"But Gravity Falls is just the beginning," Bill continued. "It's time to take our chaos worldwide!" He proceeded to create a large hole in the Fearamid. "Alright boys, to the corners of the Earth. Set the world aflame with your weirdness. This dimension is ours!"

All of the Ciphers flew out through the hole and into the sky. "Ah, global domination," Bill said aloud. "I could get used to-"

BONK!

That was the sound of the Ciphers hitting an invisible shield, causing them to fall back into the Fearamid. "WHAT?!" Bill exclaimed.

The triangle Cipher went up to the sky and poked midair, revealing an invisible shield surrounding, containing the rift and the Ciphers' chaos. "Hmm... This might be more complicated than I thought," Bill realized.

"I think I broke something," a blackish-dark green Cipher named Paci-Fire complained.

"Walk it off!" Bill snapped.

Meanwhile, inside the prison bubble, Marcus, Patterson, Oinkers, William, and Salls were walking around inside an empty nothingness. Dana was nowhere to be seen.

"Okay guys, Bill has taken over the town," Marcus said. "If his weirdness spreads, he's gonna take over the whole world. Our first step to stopping him is rescuing Dana, but he's got her trapped in this strange prison bubble."

"You don't have to remind us," Patterson pointed out.

"What is this place anyway?" William asked.

As if on cue, the ground started cracking with cyan-colored fractures. The group screamed as they fell. After a while, they landed in...some kind of cushioned alley?

"Do you hear 80s music?" William asked.

"That's not any 80s music," Patterson said. "That's The Feeling of Heart by Louie Whois and the Word. And that can only mean one thing..."

The protagonists stepped out of the alley, only to see a surprising sight. They saw a future-retro city with holographic signs, flying cars, and so many hoverboards. The wardrobe style that the locals wore was downright tacky and the city's signature feature was a courthouse.

"What is this new world?" Salls asked. "Shining, shimmering, splendid!"

"It's Towards the Past!" Patterson said, smiling wide. "In fact, this is an exact recreation of 2015 Mill Galley. I remember Dana saying tell me this was her favorite setting in the entire franchise."

"Wait, so how could this be Dana's prison?" William asked.

"I'm not sure," Marcus said, clutching Oinkers' leash. "This world was created by Bill. It was probably made out of blood and ground-up bones. He's using Dana's own fantasies as some sick trap. We need to grab her and get the hell out of here."

"Then I think I know where Dana is," Patterson said. "Her favorite location in the setting: Cafe Retro."

"So you know where it is?" Marcus asked.

"Of course I do," Patterson answered. "If I'm right, she's sitting at the cafe sipping on a bottle of Peepsi Perfect."

It took a while, but the group managed to arrive at Cafe Retro. It was an 80s-themed diner with computer monitors as the servers and 80s music playing in the background.

"So Patterson, you like Towards the Past as much as Dana," William said. "Will she be wearing a special outfit?"

"Obviously," Patterson replied. "She's going to be dressed like Michael McFennek, so be on the lookout for a girl wearing a neon-rainbow hat, a maroon jacket with a red t-shirt, light blue jeans with the pockets turned inside-out, and white self-lacing sneakers."

"Don't forget about her ponytail," Marcus added. "She's always seen with her hair tied up in a ponytail. It's kind of her trademark feature."

But after a quick scan of the diner, they couldn't find her. "Weird," Salls said. "Maybe she isn't-"

Suddenly, a girl entered the cafe. She wore a fitted dark pink dress with poofy sleeves and a diamond row going across the torso section. She also wore silver sandals and her brown hair was curly and long enough to reach the floor, completing the look with a silver tiara. She smiled as the locals looked at her in awe. She walked over to the bar and sat on a stool. She was so beautiful and princess-like, which was very out of place regarding the atmosphere's future-retro setting.

"Welcome back, your highness," one of the computer servers said. "Would you like the usual?"

"Yes," the girl said, speaking in a familiar high-pitched voice. "But throw in a slice of dehydrated pizza. I kinda skipped lunch today."

"Very well," the computer server said. "Anything for you, Princess Dana."

Within a few seconds, a bottle of Peepsi Perfect popped up from the table and the computer server brought out a slice of pizza. As the princess enjoyed her meal, Marcus, Patterson, William, and Salls were shocked.

"That's Dana?" William asked, sounding disgusted. "She looks so...girly."

"It can't be her," Salls said. "That girl doesn't have any bangs and her forehead is blank."

"Unless this is part of the illusion," Marcus concluded.

"Then we have to get her out of here," Patterson said. He stepped forward. "Hey Dana!"

Dana dropped her pizza onto the plate in shock. She slowly turned around, only to see her friends and brother. "No..." she whispered, terrified.

Patterson walked over to Dana. "Come on, Dana," he said, placing his hand on her shoulder. "We're here to rescue y-"

"No!" Dana exclaimed, pulling away from Patterson. "Leave me alone!"

The others approached Dana. "There's no time to explain!" William said. "We gotta hurry!"

"You don't understand-" Dana began.

"Don't worry, Dana," Marcus said. "We'll get you out of this!"

Without saying another word, Dana snapped her fingers. Suddenly, an invisible force pushed the protagonists away from the former tomboy.

"Dana, what are you doing?!" Marcus asked. "We're trying to save you from this prison!"

"This isn't a prison!" Dana insisted. "This is paradise! My heaven! This is my home now! I don't want to be saved!"

Marcus, Salls, William, and Patterson were shocked. "Say what?" Salls asked.

Dana ate some of her pizza. "It's complicated," she said after swallowing the bite. "After Guardian told me I'm part of some big prophecy regarding the Ciphers' defeat and I was somehow a reincarnation of Graunt Silvia, I wanted to leave this town and my whole life behind forever. But after I blacked out, I woke up in a place that gives me exactly what I wanted: a perfect paradise where I'm the town's precious princess! Best of all, I finally have my own identity."

"Snap out of it!" Marcus exclaimed. "Do you know what I went through trying to save you?! My favorite shirt has been stained with blood!"

"I don't care about that!" Dana insisted. "I honestly wasn't expecting you guys to show up. I'm surprised Seb didn't find you."

As if on cue, a dark-haired man wearing a white suit entered the diner and approached Dana. "My apologies, Dana," he said, speaking in a British accent. "I wasn't expecting anyone to intrude on your paradise."

"Dana, who is this guy?" Patterson asked.

"Allow me to introduce myself," the man said. "I am Seb, and I'm head of the Nethersphere, a place where those who have died come to live out their afterlives in happiness."

"What?" William asked.

"It's not all that complicated," Seb said. "Basically, Ms. Pines died when she fell off a cliff, and she chose to live out her afterlife in a recreation of 2015 Mill Galley from Towards the Past."

"Seb's right," Dana said. "He said I died falling off a cliff, so that must have happened to me. Besides, I'm so much happier this way. I'm finally a beautiful girl and everyone in this world loves me for who I really am." She took a sip of her Peepsi Perfect.

"Dana, listen to yourself!" Marcus said. "This is crazy! I'm sorry things aren't great for you right now, but that doesn't mean you should stay in here forever!"

"But this place is perfect!" Dana insisted. "And if you let it, this world could make all your dreams come true as well."

"Actually, Dana, I agree with Marcus on this," William said. "Gravity Falls is in trouble and I really think-"

HONK HONK!

"And I believe that's your cue, Mr. Corduroy," Seb said as he opened the door.

William looked outside, only to see Trisha, Taylor, Liz, and Natalie in a monster truck. The red-haired teen was surprised. "Wha- Guys?" he asked. "You're safe!"

"We've got a monster truck full of fireworks, fake IDs, and pranking supplies," Liz said.

"Wanna drive this truck to the high school and glue this plunger to the principal's head?" Natalie asked, holding up a plunger.

"Yes," William replied. "Yes I do." He looked back at the group. "Sorry guys. I always wanted to do that. I'll be back in just a few minutes."

And with that, William got in truck and it drove off. "William, wait!" Marcus called out.

"Don't worry," Salls said. "There's nothing in this world that could break me from our mission."

"I wouldn't say that," Seb said.

Sure enough, two people entered the cafe, one male and one female. The female bared a strong resemblance to Salls. "Hey there, champ," the male said. "We're back."

Salls was in awe. "Holy- Whoa, whoa. Mom? Dad?"

"We know we treated you like garbage because you're a lesbian," Mrs. Ramirez said. "But as long as you're in this world, we can finally be a happy family."

"You're perfect!" Salls happily said.

"It's a trap!" Marcus said, armed with his grappling hook. "Don't go with them, Salls! No matter what they offer you!"

Mr. Ramirez held up a ball and a baseball glove. "I can finally teach you how to play baseball," he suggested.

"I'm sorry," Salls told Marcus. "Even if it is all a dream, I've gotta spend some time with my folks." And with that, she left the diner with her parents.

Marcus looked over at Dana. "This has gone too far!" he said. "You can't honestly think these fantasies are good for anyone!"

"But Marcus, people are happy here!" Dana said. "Seb's Nethersphere has something for everyone. Even you and Pattersion. In fact..."

"Ah, yes," Seb said, looking at a clipboard. "Patterson Southeast, your parents are waiting for you by the clock tower. I have modified them so they actually notice you. And Marcus Pines-"

"Nope!" Marcus said, clutching his broken headphones. "Whatever it is, I'm interested!"

Back in the Fearamid, the Ciphers all groaned, having been using their own bodies as battering rams to break through the barrier.

"Alright," Bill said, pacing back and force. "Can anyone explain to me why, even with our newfound INFINITE POWER..." He made lightning strike the walls. "...NONE OF US CAN ESCAPE THE BORDERS OF THIS STUPID HICK TOWN?!" He sat back down on his stone throne. "There's some kind of force field keeping us in, but who would know how to fix it?"

Bill held up his golden statue, and he had a sudden thought. "Hmm... Maybe someone needs to come out of retirement..." he realized.

Back in the Nethersphere, Dana had finished her meal at Cafe Retro. At the moment she was riding on a diamond-studded hoverboard around the pond. She smiled wide, happy with her new life. In Mill Galley, there wasn't any stupid prophecies. She could finally be her own person.

"Dana, we need to talk."

Dana halted her hoverboard and faced William. "Oh, hey, William, what's up?" she asked. "I thought you were embracing your perfect paradise."

"Yeah, that got old quick," William said. "And this 80s music is really starting to get on my nerves."

"It's all part of my perfect paradise," Dana said. "After all, The Feeling of Heart is the unofficial theme song of the Towards the Past franchise." She thought about it for a while. "Well, that and Go Through Time, which is also performed by Louie Whois and the Word."

"Dana, this isn't like you," William said. "Bill must have brainwashed you into becoming this ultra-feminine princess."

"William, being a tomboy who likes Mysterious Sciencey Screening 1000 is one part of my personality," Dana said. "You just have to accept that there's more to me than that. After all, we are unofficially married."

"Yeah, about that..." William said, looking at his ring. "I'm starting to realize that you were better off as just my friend. I mean, you're my dream girl, but what if I do something bad to you? I'm so much older than you."

"It's okay," Dana said, looking at her own ring. "I've been questioning our relationship ever since that road trip. I only agreed to date you because I thought no other guy would like me."

"So how about we end it before either one of us gets hurt?" William asked.

"I was thinking the exact same thing," Dana agreed.

And with that, the two friends took off their rings and threw them into the pond.

Suddenly, there was a bit of a scuffle nearby. Dana rode her hoverboard over the the ground as William followed her. The brunette girl gasped, seeing her own brother being tackled by guards.

"You are hereby accused of breaking the Nethersphere's one rule: mentioning reality," one guard told Marcus. "Prepare to be banished from this land FOREVER."

Marcus looked at Dana. "Dana, you're smarter than this!" he exclaimed. "Bill has you hypnotized or something! Are you really gonna let them banish me?!"

"Guards, as the princess of this land, I won't let you banish my own brother," Dana ordered. "There has to be some other way."

"Very well," the guard said. "If Marcus Pines wishes to stay, he must plead his case in the ultimate trial of fantasy vs. reality."

And so, the locals gathered in the courthouse. Salls, William, Patterson, and Oinkers were sitting in the crowd, with Dana and Marcus sitting at a table near the front.

"I can't believe you're letting them take our argument to court," Marcus said.

"It's not my fault," Dana said. "I didn't make the rules of this world."

"All rise for the honorable Judge," a policeman said.

A cowboy corpse-like ghost emerged from the ground and floated up to the judge seat. "Order! Order!" he said, speaking in a strong southern accent. "This trial begins right now! We are here to trial Marcus Pines in the case of fantasy vs. reality. If Marcus wins, Princess Dana will return with him to the real world! But if he loses, he will be banished forever! The final decision will be made by a jury of your peers."

Dana snapped her fingers, and six brightly-colored ponies appeared in the jury stand. One was orange, one was light blue, one was white, one was pink, one was yellow, and one was lilac.

Marcus glared at Dana. "Just to be clear, this whole thing is ridiculous," he said. "But if winning a trial is what it takes for you to come home, then fine."

"I'm sorry, Marcus, but I can only speak through my legal team now," Dana said.

As if on cue, Seb entered, carrying a black briefcase. "Let's hear openin' statements," the Judge said.

"Your honor, townsfolk, jury ponies, my case is simple," Seb said. "This broken young man thinks reality is better than fantasy. But in Princess Dana's words, reality is cruel, unforgiving, and miserable."

"Yeah right," Marcus said. "Reality isn't that bad."

"Oh really?" Seb asked. "Allow me to show you this reality that Mr. Pines loves so much, and show you how it has wronged my client during her entire life." He took a book titled 'Dana Memories' from the briefcase and opened it. "Second grade, October 10th. Photo day." The book created a holographic image. "It started off as a typical day for the young princess. She was ready to have her picture taken. But the unthinkable happened."

A younger Dana, who was wearing a light grey t-shirt, dark blue pants, and red sneakers. Unlike today Dana, she did not have any bangs and her hair was loose. She was walking over to the school gymnasium, but she was abused by a group of girls.

"Hey!" Dana exclaimed.

"Oh, be quiet, Dipper," one girl said tauntingly. "We're just reminding you that you're a freak." She took out a pair of safety scissors. "And freaks aren't allowed to have such nice hair."

Dana's eyes widened at the sight of the scissors. "No!" she cried out. "It took so long for me to have perfect hair!" But not seeing that the girls were going to let go, she closed her eyes, knowing she was never going to have perfect hair again.

"Princess Dana wanted to have such pretty hair, but in reality, it was all chopped off that day, leaving her bald," Seb said.

"Objection!" Marcus exclaimed. "That did not happen!"

But Seb ignored Marcus. "But that wasn't the only bad day Princess Dana had," he continued. "February fourteenth, fourth grade. Valentine's Day. The day that changed her relationship with her brother."

A young Dana and Marcus were in their classroom. Dana wore a black Towards the Past t-shirt, a red jacket, cargo pants, and light grey sneakers. She had her bangs and her hair was tied up in a ponytail. Marcus wore a pink collared shirt, blue jeans, and cyan sneakers.

Marcus had a bag full of Valentine's cards. "How many valentines did you get, Stargirl?" he asked.

Dana shook her bag, but only one card from Marcus came out.

"Hey, everyone!" a fat kid exclaimed. "Dipper barely got any valentines!"

The other kids proceeded to laugh at Dana, who looked so upset. "Hey, come on, sis," Marcus said, placing his hand on her shoulder. "It's not that ba-"

POW!

The laughter stopped. Dana's sad expression became that of anger, her fist still clenched. Marcus was shocked. His sister never hit him before. "Dana..." he said softly.

But Dana got up from her seat and ran out of the classroom. "Geez, I can't believe that freak's your sister," the fat kid told Marcus.

"What's the point of all this?" Marcus asked. "That was in the past!"

"But Princess Dana's life isn't any better now," Seb said. "Family heartbreak, disaster, a horrible prophecy... That's the kind of reality she has. Out there, it's nothing but tragedy. But in here, the young princess is happy. She can be her own person and live out her own life."

"Well, I think we're ready for a verdict," the Judge said.

"Wait!" Marcus exclaimed. "I haven't even presented my case!"

"Do you even have a case?" the Judge asked.

"Yes, I do, your honor," Marcus said. "I call as a witness: Dana Pines!"

"I'll allow it," the Judge said.

Dana walked up and say in the witness chair. "Stargirl, listen," Marcus said. "I might not have all the answers. I'm not smart, I'm not interested in the same stuff you like, and I know we have fought a lot in the past. But I know one thing well, and that's you. And I know that although you might act like it, you don't wanna be in this fantasy world."

"Well that's a lot of bologna," Dana said.

"You're rejecting the reality that you're a reincarnation of Graunt Silvia and that you're part of this prophecy regarding Bill's defeat," Marcus continued. "And who could blame you? You spent your entire life trying to find your own identity. You just couldn't handle the truth."

"Technically that's true," Dana said. "But it still doesn't change anything!"

"Real life stinks sometimes," Marcus continued. "But there's a better way to get through it than denial, and that's with help from people who care about you. It's how we got through life together. Just look." He grabbed the book from Seb and resumed the Photo Day memory.

"Leave my sister alone!"

The girls looked up, only to see a younger Marcus, who wore a light pink t-shirt, purple-pink shorts, and dark pink sneakers. "Oh great," the head girl said. "It's the freak's twin brother."

"My sister is not a freak!" Marcus exclaimed. "She is the prettiest and most special girl in the world! If you don't see that, then you're probably just a dumb-head!"

"Whatever," the head girl said. "Let's just go." And with that, the girls left.

Marcus walked over to Dana and helped her get back on her feet. "Are you alright?" he asked.

Dana felt her hair. "Good, it's still intact," she said. "But..." She noticed the safety scissors on the ground, and she picked them up.

"Dana?" Marcus asked.

With her free hand, Dana grabbed the front portion of her hair. Taking a deep breath and closing her eyes, she cut that portion short, giving herself bangs. She dropped the loose hair to the ground.

"Dana!" Marcus exclaimed.

Dana opened her eyes and forced a smile. "It's okay," she said, tears forming in her eyes. "Now people won't make fun of me anymore. E-Even if it means I won't have perfect hair anymore..."

Marcus didn't like seeing his sister getting upset, so he had an idea. He took off one of the rubber bands he had on his arms and used it to tie Dana's hair in a ponytail. When he did, she let out a soft gasp. He then took out his compact mirror and opened it, allowing his sister to see his handiwork.

"It's a ponytail," Marcus explained. "A lot of pretty girls have them, so I figured it would look nice on you."

Dana looked up at Marcus and smiled. "Thank you," she said. "I look prettier than before."

"That's the idea," Stargirl," Marcus said.

"Stargirl?" Dana asked.

"'Cause you're a girl with pretty stars on your forehead," Marcus explained. "At least it's better than Dipper."

"I've always been there for you," Marcus said. "Even after we started having frequent fights."

Patterson stood up and walked over to Marcus. "Don't forget about me," he told Dana. "If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have been able to become a better person. I'll never forget those kind words you told me that night. And remember what Doc Blue said: Your future hasn't been written yet. It's whatever you do with it, so make it a good one."

"Patterson..." Dana said, giving him a glossy-eyed look of admiration.

"Besides, we've traveled to hell and back to get you and we're goin' back together," Marcus said. "Leave this fantasy world. Let's beat Bill so you can decide your future."

"What about the Guardian?" Dana asked.

"Who cares what that alien lady says?" Marcus asked in response. "You decide your life, not some prophecy. Awkward sibling hug?"

Dana smiled, tears of joy coming from her eyes. With a small sniffle, she tackled Marcus for a hug, happily crying. Marcus responded by patting Dana on the back twice.

Suddenly, a flash of blue light appeared, changing Dana back to her usual tomboy self. When the twins parted, Dana was smiling wide. "That's more like it," she said, adjusting her ponytail. "Now come on, let's go home."

But when Dana snapped her fingers, nothing happened. "Why isn't this working?" she asked.

"Yeah, about that," Seb said. "The Nethersphere isn't actually a paradise. Bill knows you're the Hybrid. He knows the mistake he made thirty years ago. So he trapped you in a prison, whether you want to stay here or not." He clapped his hands twice.

Suddenly, chains appeared on Dana's wrists, chaining her to the ground. She tried to struggle, but it didn't work. She was still chained.

"Come on, Dana!" Salls said. "You're stronger than this!"

As Dana struggled, yellow glowing energy began to swirl around her. "Holy smokes..." Marcus muttered, clutching Oinkers' leash.

The glowing energy was released like a massive explosion, dissolving the chains. "Come on!" Marcus said, helping Dana get back on her feet. "We have to get you out of here!"

As the group ran away from the courthouse, the whole world started to fade away as various Cipher creatures chased after them.

Eventually, the group reached the bubble's edge. "Sorry Nethersphere," Dana said, clenching her fist. "It's time to burst your bubble!" She jumped up and punched the bubble as hard as she could.

POP!

The group managed to get back to the real world. Dana breathed heavily, still surprised that she activated her Hybrid powers again. "Is everyone alright?" she asked.

"Oh Dana!" Marcus exclaimed, hugging his sister. "Welcome back!"

Dana chuckled. "You must have gone nuts while I was gone," she said, noticing Marcus' broken headphones, blood-stained shirt, torn shorts, and slightly longer hair.

"Yeah, I know," Marcus said, rubbing the back of his head. "I'm probably due for a haircut at this point."

"But seriously, how much damage could Bill do?" Dana asked. She looked the other way and saw Bill's damage. "Oh boy."

The group walked through town. "Figures," Marcus said. "Bill captured most of the residence the last time I checked."

"The town's deserted," William said.

"Did Bill already win?" Salls asked.

"Come on, guys," Dana said. "Let's see if we can still go hide out in the hut."

Sure enough, the Surprise Hut had remained the same. "Yep," Dana said. "Same old hut."

"Oh, man, this is the first time I've ever felt happy going to work," William said.

"Hello house," Marcus said, slowly getting back to his old cheerful self. "Hello porch. Hello wads of gum I left stuck to the couch."

Dana reached for the handle, but she stopped when she heard scuffling. "Wait, what was that?" She picked up a golf club as William aimed his crossbow, Salls held up her fists, Marcus held up his grappling hook, and Patterson readied a karate move.

"Let's get 'em," Salls said.

Dana kicked open the door, allowing her, Marcus, Salls, William, Patterson, and Oinkers to run in.

But inside the hut, the group was in for a shock. The hut was already inhabited by the good-hearted unicorn, Theta the Manicur, two random townsfolk, Cameron, Gary, Chief Blubs, Old Woman McGucket, Daniel, and some gnomes. The Guardian was in front of that group, readying her Sonic Cane.

"Guardian?" Dana and Marcus asked.

"Kids?" the Guardian asked.

Suddenly, .GIFfany, who was still inhabiting the cheerleader animatronic, emerged from the bathroom. "Excuse me," she said. "We are out of toilet paper." She looked over at Dana, Marcus, Oinkers, Patterson, Salls, and William. "Oh, hey Salls. Long time, no see."