And boy, was Sean an idiot. Before the man could advance two steps in their direction, Leonard roundhouse kicked him in the head, effectively landing him on the ground and knocking him out. Leonard took a deep breath, centering himself, and turned to the petrified Jocelyn. "I guess it's time for us to leave now." Leonard said, rubbing his left cheekbone. He'd have some light bruising, but luckily no black eyes or a bloody nose. He never was very easy to bruise, thank god. "His head will hurt pretty bad when he wakes up. You can keep him here or take him to the hospital. He should stay in bed and rest for several hours after waking." Leonard said, but Jocelyn just gaped at him.
Leonard bent down and hugged Joanna, who held onto him tightly. "I love you daddy, no matter what." She said, before whispering in his ear, "Thank you for putting him in his place." Leonard smiled and rolled his eyes, even though she couldn't have seen that. He kissed her cheek and let go of her.
"I love you too, Jo-Jo. Be sure to video call, a lot." Leonard said, and she nodded avidly. He turned to Jocelyn while Joanna rushed over to say her goodbyes to Spock. "Goodbye, Jocelyn." He said quietly, and she nodded.
"Goodbye, Leonard." She answered quietly. Leonard nodded and turned around. Joanna hugged Spock suddenly, and the poor Vulcan didn't really know what to do before he hesitantly hugged her back. Leonard snorted and went to the door, avoiding the man on the floor. Spock joined him shortly, and they exited the house.
After a silent trip back to their hotel room, Leonard sat on the bed and sighed. "That... felt good."
"No, it did not." Spock said shortly, standing in front of him. Leonard glared up at the Vulcan.
"What's your problem? It turned out okay in the end." He said, but Spock shook his head.
"He hurt you." Spock said quietly, and Leonard continued to glare.
"He hurt YOU!" He said louder, and Spock held his gaze.
"It wasn't necessary to be violent." Spock said, making Leonard sigh. Again.
"He made it necessary. He hit you, and I wasn't going to let him get away with that, damn it!" Leonard argued and stood up, heading for the bathroom. "I'm going to take a hot shower." He grumbled, closing the door behind him.
The water felt good on the places that he got hit, and he let out a deep breath. Did he do the right thing? Maybe. Did it feel good? Definitely. Even though he was hurting, even though he'll have at least a couple of bruises on his face and on his knuckles, he still felt good. Before he could justify his actions by thinking of his feelings for Spock, he thought about how he'd do the same thing if it were Jim. Wouldn't he? ... No. No, he wouldn't. In fact, there had been several occasions where Jim had gotten into fights, and Leonard had either waited it out (harmless drunken brawl), or just took Jim away from the area completely. He usually tried to avoid fights, being a doctor and all that.
Maybe he finally found someone worth risking his safety for.
Or maybe he was trying to defend his pride. Yep, it was pride. Definitely.
He got into bed, feeling infinitely tired, and fell asleep quickly. Shore leave wasn't supposed to be this stressful.
Leonard woke up to the room filling with sunlight, and opened his eyes to (predictably) find his and Spock's noggins pressed together. He sighed quietly, and got up as quiet as he could. He was still tired, but he didn't think that he could go back to sleep. He just headed down to the hotel's lobby to see if they had any breakfast down there.
And so shore leave ended a few peaceful days later, with no significant events whatsoever. Spock continued to be quiet and thoughtful about everything, and Leonard continued to stare at the rear ends of waitresses and glare at anyone who looked at him.
"Holy mother of Jesus Christ what in the hell happened?" Jim said as soon as he saw Leonard on the ship. The doctor snorted and shook his head.
"Nice to see you too, Jim. Got into a scuffle the other day. I'm not talking about it." Leonard grunted, walking towards sickbay. "Gotta check in, make sure everything's in order. When do we take off?"
"Five hours. I'll see you later!" Jim called after him, but Leonard just rolled his eyes. After so long away, he was ready to get back to work and get some distractions. Shore leave was just a little more than he could handle, especially since Spock pretty much stopped talking to him by the last day. The bastard.
The nurses were already putzing around the sickbay, organizing things and making the sure the area was neat and tidy. M'Benga was overseeing the installment of some new equipment, to which Leonard headed over to watch. "Ah, Dr. McCoy! Nice to see you back." The man eyed Leonard's slightly bruised face, but chose not to comment. Smart man. "This is the newest and best machine for tissue repair." Leonard snorted.
"Yeah, they keep inventin' machines like this and they'll put us outta our jobs." Leonard grumbled, and walked off. He'd read the instruction manual for the new machine later. Right then, it was time to get everything back into order, just the way it was.
After a long day of preparation and making sure people were still healthy, Leonard left work and went to the mess for a late meal. He ate really lightly before trudging back to his quarters. He was already quite tired from the sudden stress of getting back to work. He was beyond ready to go to sleep for the night.
Leonard snuggled his head against the pillow, pulling the blankets up to his chin. He couldn't help but feel a little cold, now that they were in space, it was sort of inevitable... Even though it was winter on Earth and he never really got cold while he was there. He sighed, trying to clear his mind.
After flipping and tossing and turning and sighing for at least an hour, Leonard groaned loudly. What the hell?! He'd been able to sleep fine for the past few years, what changed now? He hit his head on the headboard, and it clicked. Spock. Waking up with their heads together had become so normal, and the heat beside him in the bed was a comfort. He glared inwardly. Did he really enjoy going to sleep with another man? Couldn't he just hypo himself into sleeping? But that wasn't healthy. But flopping around all night wasn't healthy either.
Before he could talk himself out of it, he forced himself out of bed. He snatched up his pillow and trudged out of his quarters, rubbing his eyes along the way. God he was so tired. His bruises were mostly small and faded, but now he had bags under his eyes and messy hair.
Leonard suddenly got self-conscious, but he pushed the thought away. Spock was the one who was usually on him about being more intimate, he could deal with it if Leonard wasn't as pretty as he usually was. Was he being too unreasonable?
Where was he? He felt like he walked the whole way with eyes closed, but Commander Spock's door was there. He knocked quietly, knowing that the Vulcan's super-hearing would prevail. Spock appeared at the door, eyebrow raised. Leonard just looked at him, not knowing how to form his thoughts on why exactly he was there. Spock looked the man up and down, saw his pillow, and stood to the side to let him in. Leonard smiled tiredly, and walked in while rubbing one of his eyes.
They both got into bed, Leonard shoving his pillow next to Spock's and laying down against it. The bed was much smaller than the one at the hotel, though, so they were much closer together. He didn't turn over this time, though. He and Spock just stared at each other silently, until Leonard closed his eyes and fell asleep immediately.
They woke up, heads together as usual, the alarm beeping at them. Leonard groaned, and Spock shut off the alarm.
"Time's'it?" Leonard slurred, rolling away from Spock and the godforsaken object that woke them up.
"It is 05:00." He heard Spock say, and he made a face.
"Jesus Christ why'd'you get up so fucking early?" Leonard groaned again, trying to bury his face in the pillow.
"Go back to sleep. I will wake you when I am finished getting ready." Spock said, and Leonard sighed. He might as well obey that order...
...
"Leonard, it is time to wake up." Spock said quietly, a hand on his shoulder. Leonard sighed, rubbed his race tiredly, and rolled over. It was 05:30 now, but he felt like it had only been three seconds. He sighed again, and got out of bed.
"I didn't even bring any of my clothes." Leonard scolded himself, facepalming. Already dressed, Spock just raised an eyebrow at him.
"You may borrow my clothes, if you wish. I cannot imagine that our clothing sizes are quite different." Spock suggested, and Leonard narrowed his eyes at him. First sleeping in his bed, now borrowing his clothes? Wasn't that a bit overboard?!
"Yeah, okay. Thanks, Spock." Leonard said, and Spock gestured for him to go at his drawers. He did so, and the Vulcan lit some incense. Morning meditation, huh? Ever the peaceful, sentimental being. Damn hobgoblins...
"Leonard! Great to see you!" Christine smiled broadly at Leonard as he walked into Sickbay. "Sorry I couldn't catch you yesterday, I was busy attending to other things. Did you have a good shore leave?"
"Yeah, it was alright. Aside from a few little things. Got to see my daughter, and she finally got to meet Spock." Leonard said, heading to his office, knowing Christine would follow.
"Oh, you spent your vacation with Spock?" Christine asked, sounding somewhat distant. She stood across from him at the desk, and he nodded at her in affirmation. She suddenly gasped and lifted his chin up with her hand. "You're bruised! How'd that happen?" She asked worriedly, and Leonard snorted and moved across the room, trying to busy himself with other things.
"I just got into a fight- nothing to worry about." Leonard answered, shaking his head.
"A fight... with Spock?" Christine spoke quietly, and Leonard turned around quickly to look at her incredulously.
"What? No! I mean, Spock was involved, but only because I was tryin' to beat the ass of some guy who punched him. Damn psycho..." He grumbled, and turned back around. Things around there really got disorganized fast, with all the hype of any emergencies and all that. It was a wonder that they didn't CAUSE any emergencies...
"... So you and Spock are together? Actually together? Still?" Christine asked quietly, and Leonard sighed. He turned to face her again, but he stayed like that this time.
"Yes, we're still together. We may do absolutely nothing that would make us a couple, but yes, we are together. And..." He hesitated, but Christine held his gaze with a kind demeanor. "When you and I would get together in Ten Forward... I had a lot of fun. And you're incredibly beautiful, Christine. I would've loved to spend more time with you. But I can't let that continue if you think that there's something still going on between us. It's time that I actually face the music with Spock-"
"So you love him?" Christine interrupted, and Leonard scoffed at her.
"Is that all you got from that?! Jesus..." Leonard shook his head. "Let's actually get to work, now, Nurse." He said, giving her The Look, and she nodded at him. She did look pretty disappointed, and she didn't quite treat him the same way as she used to, but they'd both have to deal with that.
A few people had gotten mildly sick over the leave, so Leonard treated them as quickly and efficiently as possible. Then some were feeling a little space-sick, where Leonard could definitely sympathize. The transition was always the hardest. It usually got better in a few days.
During lunchtime, their little group of friends all sat together, Spock and Leonard sitting together as usual, but this time it actually felt natural. Jim kept trying to make conversation with people (trying to see if anyone got laid), but most kindly ignored him. Leonard just flipped him off and continued with his food.
"What DID you guys do over break?" Jim asked, throwing up his hands.
"I helped out at the Academy. They paid me to give crash courses on the grammar of different languages. Easy money." Uhura said with a shrug. Leonard snorted. It was always business with her.
"Hikaru and I went to Vegas to see ze sights... and stuff." Chekov said, shoving spoonfuls of soup in his mouth.
"Leonard and I visited Joanna in Georgia." Spock supplied, and Jim nodded at him.
"How'd that go?" He asked, and Leonard glared at him.
"So you don't even respond to anyone else's shore leave experience but ours?" Leonard asked, and Jim grinned.
"Well they didn't return to my ship with bruises on their faces, did they?!" He asked, trying to seem good-natured. Leonard just rolled his eyes, got up, and left. He needed to call Joanna, check up on how things were going now that he was a safe distance away from Earth.
Once he got to Spock's quarters, he let himself inside to use the computer. The Vulcan wouldn't be offended, would he? But then again, who cared? Leonard wasn't going to walk all the way to sickbay to call his daughter!
The video call started, and Joanna popped up, sitting in her room as per usual. "Hi dad! How're you? How's Spock?" She was bombarding him with questions already, making him smile and shake his head.
"I'm okay. Spock... I can imagine that he's doing well. How are you?" He diverged from talking about his and Spock's feelings, since both were locked away securely.
"I'm good! Mom and Sean had arguments for a few days after you two left, but they're good now. Sean even apologized for causing a scene. He can be nice when he wants to." She explained, babbling on. Her face suddenly got excited, as if she remembered something. "Oh! Also, I had been waiting until things calmed down at home to open Jim's box, so I did yesterday, and..." She moved off the frame, and heaved the box into view. "He got me all kinds of cool stuff! Seriously!" Leonard snorted.
"Jim? Cool? You sure?" He asked, and she giggled.
"Yes, I'm sure. Look." Joanna started pulling things out of the box. "Some of this stuff is totally random, like little knick-knacks from different planets. But look at this." She heaved a thick book, and opened the cover to pull out a letter. "He left this note: 'Dear Jo-Jo... Can I call you Jo-Jo? Bones calls you that. Anyway, I've never met you, but you sound like a pretty great kid. I feel like we're close because of how much Bones talks about you, so I started grabbing these because they reminded me of you. It started with just a tiny book, but eventually that wasn't enough, so I found this giant one on Anaria III- a really tropical, gorgeous planet. Hope you like it!"
Joanna giggled, put the note back under the cover, and opened the book from the middle. "See, he left these!" She showed Leonard the content, which was page after page of pressed leaves and flowers. "Not only just the flowers and leaves and stuff, but he also left notes on every page about what plant or tree or bush it was from, what planet, what happened on the mission, and all sorts of stuff! I can't stop reading it. I get to learn so much more about your life, Jim, Spock, and your crew... It's amazing!" She grinned, and Leonard couldn't help but smile. That Jim was such the romantic bastard...
"How does he even think of these things?" Leonard laughed, shaking his head. Joanna just kept grinning, and pulled more things out of the box.
"No idea, but... There's all sorts of exotic items in here: statuettes of planet rulers and deities, children's toys, books in different alien languages- even a mini set of tridimensional chess!" Joanna exclaimed, holding examples of each item up as she said them. At the chess set, Leonard snorted. Jim just kept getting weirder and weirder in his mind. "There's also some gorgeous pieces of jewelry in here." She pulled out a smaller, engraved wooden box and started showing the different rings and necklaces and bracelets and earrings. "I'm going to try to convince mom to let me get my ears pierced so that I can start wearing these." She smiled, looking at all the wares.
"He really spoiled you. I'll have to tell him how much you're enjoying the gifts-"
"So much! I'm enjoying them a lot! Please tell him thank you, thank you, THANK YOU! Please, dad." Joanna begged, and Leonard laughed again.
"Of course I will, honey." He reassured her, and she smiled back at him. They continued to talk for a long time, until eventually she had to go to bed. Leonard had no idea how much stuff Jim had accumulated for Joanna over the years. The man really did care...
Spock didn't arrive for another hour, so Leonard debated his options. Go back to his own room to try to sleep alone, or stay here and try to get away with having Spock share his bed again? It's not like it was a bad thing to stay, right? It didn't mean anything. It just meant that he was cold. Nobody can sleep while they're cold!
After brushing his teeth and stripping to his (Spock's) undershirt and boxers, Leonard reduced the lights to fifteen percent and slipped into bed. Maybe Spock just wouldn't notice he was there... He closed his eyes and drifted off.
Leonard woke up to a slouch in the bed, and he opened his eyes to see Spock settling in beside him. "I apologize, ashayam." He whispered, facing him. Leonard narrowed his eyes at him.
"What's that mean?" He asked, and Spock stayed silent as the tips of his ears turned green.
"It is Vulcan for 'beloved'." He answered, and Leonard nodded. That made it feel very real, though. Suddenly the significance of their relationship came crashing down on Leonard. The bond, their time together, That Night... "Does it trouble you to think of such things?" Spock whispered, no doubt knowing Leonard's thoughts.
"Do you regret it?" Leonard asked suddenly, referring to That Night. Their drunken stammerings, heavy sex, the stressful consequences. Spock didn't answer for a while, almost making him worry.
"It is illogical to dwell on the past." Spock said, and Leonard glared at him. "However..." He continued, making Leonard's glare go away. "Regardless of logic, I do not regret it. I find that I would rather have ended up bonded to you than any other person that I have encountered thus far." At that, Leonard... what did he do? Nothing. He was speechless. It was definitely not the reaction that he was expecting. "Do you find yourself regretting 'That Night,' Leonard?"
"Uh..." He hesitated, putting a lot of thought into it. He wasn't afraid of being harsh, so he just said what was on his mind. "Yeah. In the beginning. But... I can't really, I don't know... Picture a life without you?" He swallowed down his fear and apprehension, and changed the direction of the subject. "I mean... That Night... tell me about it. I know we melded, so we both remember it, but tell me from your perspective."
"We partook in violent intercourse." Spock said bluntly.
"That's all you associate that night with?" Leonard asked, since he knew that he personally tended to think of other things as well.
"Was it not the most significant part of the night?" Spock asked, and Leonard bit his lip.
"I guess it could be, but don't you ever think about the other more... intimate parts?" Leonard whispered, and Spock considered for a moment.
"I hadn't really thought the idea of inebriated actions to be very sincere." He answered, turning onto his back and breathing deeply.
"It's not like we weren't ourselves." Leonard countered, turning onto his back as well. He felt like the tables had turned- he was the curious one and Spock was the evasive one.
"I don't like to think that it takes a different state of mind to be romantic with someone." Spock said, talking bluntly again.
"But we weren't even together then-"
"However, sometimes I wonder if you would need to be drunk in order to simply look in my direction." Spock interrupted, and Leonard looked over at him. His jaw was clenched and he was staring up at the ceiling. "I wonder if I only matter to you when I am in danger- like when I was stabbed, or when Sean punched me. I wonder if you have any respect for me, staring at women when we're together and dining with them when we're not."
"I... You..." Leonard tried to say something, but he just didn't know what. "I'm not-"
"You are not homosexual, you are not used to being with men, you have never- dare I say- really been with a man." Spock kept going on, Leonard wanting to interrupt. "You want the perfect heterosexual life, with a loving wife and children who-"
"Shut up, Spock!" Leonard demanded, getting out of bed and walking to the door. He heard Spock get up as well.
"I have been nothing but patient with you, Leonard! While you decided to go out with Nurse Chapel multiple times, I did not interfere!" Spock yelled at him, making him turn around so that they could face each other. "While you speak of only ever loving Jocelyn, I stood silently in the other room! While you were staring at women in public, I was staring at you!"
"What do you want from me, Spock?!" Leonard yelled back, taking a step forward.
"I want you to love me like I love you!" Spock shouted, before looking down at the floor. He took a deep, jagged breath, and covered his mouth with his hand. Leonard's heartbeat picked up as he moved closer to the Vulcan. The man looked close to tears, and Leonard remembered that other than their relationship issues, Spock had a lot to endure. Had he been holding in too much hurt?
"Spock..." Leonard started, but the Vulcan shook his head.
"Don't... I don't want to break apart in front of you." Spock said quietly, turning his back on him. Leonard frowned, worried even more. He tried walking around Spock, but the man kept turning his head away. "I have to be a Vulcan, and compose my emotions. Please."
"Spock." Leonard said again, walking around Spock and making him look at him. "You don't have to be anything for me. Just be you." Tears slid down Spock's face immediately at those words, and Leonard wrapped his arms around him. They embraced each other tightly, Spock crying quietly. Leonard just held onto him, rubbing his back gently, trying to show him that he cared.
After a short while, Spock took a deep breath, and wiped away his tears. "I'm sorry," he said quietly, and let go. Leonard shook his head.
"Never be sorry for showing your emotions, Spock." He answered, nudging him to the bed so that they could both lay back down. "I'm the one who is truly sorry." He said while they got under the blankets.
They faced each other again, and Leonard put his hand on Spock's cheek. He wiped away the last tear from under his eye, and leaned forward. He hesitated, since the other man didn't lean forward with him, but he pressed his lips to Spock's anyway. His heartbeat sped up significantly, and he pulled away to look at the Vulcan. They stared at each other for a long time before falling asleep in peace.