10:02. Riley sits in her bed, trying to contain her breathing. She's about to tell someone she barely knows something that is so personal to her it made her shut everyone out. She can do this. She takes a deep breath.
Where is he?
Right when she thinks this, she hears a tap on her window and looks over to see Lucas standing outside. She gets up and opens it for him, watching him crawl in. She turns around and walks slowly to her bed, steeling herself for what she is about to do. She sits down and pulls her knees up to her chest curling over them. Without any prompting from Lucas, she begins speaking.
"I was a freshman in high school and at the time, you wouldn't even recognize me. I wore skirts and colors and floral. I never wore make up. I was always happy and twirling around everywhere. I don't even know where that girl is anymore, or if she even exists.
"I was always insecure, though I hid it well. I never was as pretty as my best friend, or as funny. Anyway, one day, this senior boy named Tyler came up to me at my locker and started talking to me. Me being my naive little self, I was so excited that a cute senior wanted to talk to me, some awkward, geeky freshman. The captain of the football team, he could have anyone he wanted, and he picked me.
"After a while, he asked me out and we started dating. I went to his football games and we went on a few dates. One night after a football game, there was this party and he asked me if I wanted to go. I wasn't really feeling up to it, but I knew he wanted to so I went with him. Realize this was my first high school party and I thought all those stories they told us in middle school were lies to scare us out of having any fun. How bad could it be, right?
"We got there and I was just hit with the warmth and the smell. Alcohol smells gross, did you know that? It just hit me in the nose and I thought I would be sick. But I still stayed. Oh I wish I hadn't stayed." Riley closed her eyes and took a deep breath. This is where it got bad.
"He went and got me a drink. Even at this party, I was still a good girl, refusing to break the rules. I pretended to drink it, dumping a little any chance I got. Tyler kept drinking more and more and started to get a little drunk. I eventually just walked him outside and started to walk him home. It was late and there was no one else around in the street and he started to get a little more touchy. I had never even kissed a boy and he was suddenly trying to grope me. I tried to shove him off but I'm a very weak individual and he was a football jock, obviously he was stronger than me.
"He had moved out of his parents house right after he turned eighteen but I had never been to his apartment because my parents wouldn't let me. I finally got him to stop touching me and I walked him back to his apartment. I laid him on the couch and turned around to leave, thinking he had passed out but he reached out and grabbed me. He... He tried to..." Riley can't finish as her lower lip starts quivering. Lucas puts a comforting arm around her and she takes a cleansing breath, trying again.
"He tried to rape me. Luckily for me, I managed to run away and lock myself in the bathroom, sneaking out in the morning. Only problem was that i was covered in bruises. When I got home through my window, I jumped in the shower and tried to wash the feeling of him off of me, but I couldn't. I basically fell into a depression and my parents started asking questions when I stopped eating. I finally gave in and told them, though I didn't tell them it was Tyler. I didn't want him getting in trouble for something he wasn't in control of. After that, I stopped being so happy and colorful. This made Tyler break up with me, saying I'd changed. I knew he didn't remember what he did, but it still hurt.
"My dad said not again because, yes, it happened before and he had seen the bruises. He knew what I did last time it happened and I think I scared the living daylights a out of him when you showed up carrying me." Riley finally looks up at Lucas to see has reaction, having stared at the floor to tell the whole story. She expects to see pity and perhaps disgust at her. Who would want damaged goods? But that isn't the expression she sees. She sees what she can only describe as a rage. A jolt of terror runs through her and it must show on her face because he immediately softens. He pulls her in for a hug and she realizes she hasn't felt this light in forever.