Hey guys, sorry this fanfic is so long! I did not expect it to go this way. I probably should have split it up into several shorter stories, sorry….
Jo was back in less than two minutes, sporting a small first aid kit. "Alright, shirt off."
"Sweetheart, if you want me naked, all you have to do is say so."
She glared at him. "Shut up. You're still in trouble."
He reluctantly rolled up his sleeves.
"Hey, what did I just say? Shirt. Off."
He fidgeted. "Why? You saw the cuts, they're just on my arm."
"You're a horrible liar. I saw your chest last night, Dean. I know you cut there too."
"Maybe I didn't this time." Dean prayed that she wouldn't push it. His stomach was where the worst cut was. He didn't want her to see it.
"I'm not stupid. Take of your shirt. Come on."
He sighed, and grudgingly obeyed. Jo inhaled sharply as she saw what he had been hiding. "Dean…."
The cut was about four inches long, spanning across his abs. Dean cursed himself. He couldn't even say it was an accident. He'd meant to cut that deep. The gashes on his arms were just practice. They would only need a few stitches. This one however…he probably should have gone to a hospital. It had bled for hours.
"You didn't even take care of it. You could have at least put some gauze over the top." Jo's tone was accusing. "I can fit my whole finger in there! Jesus, Dean….any deeper and your guts would be falling out."
"Sorry," He mumbled.
She threaded the needle and began to prepare to stitch him up.
All of a sudden, the door swung open. "Hey, I saw Jo carrying the first aid kit, and-OH!" Ash stood in the doorway, eyes wide as he took in the scene before him.
Dean and Jo sat on the edge of the bed, Dean's cuts and scars painfully visible.
Ash walked over. "Man, what did you pick a fight with?"
"Nothing. It's nothing." Dean hurriedly picked up his shirt and tried to hide behind it.
"Don't be a pansy. Let's see what you got." Ash swatted his hands away, but froze when he saw Dean's wrist; dozens of horizontal cuts in a pattern. Straight, deliberate lines which could only mean one thing.
"Uh, Dean-O…you know that's bad right? Like, really bad. They lock people away for shit like that." Ash bit his lip.
"I know." Dean said flatly.
"Shit, man." Ash looked uncomfortable, scratching the back of his head. "If you ever wanna talk about it…you know I'm game."
"Thanks."
"Does Sam know?"
"Unfortunately."
"Hate to break it to you, bud, but that's probably a good thing." He paused. You're not gonna…you know…are you?" He made a gun with his fingers and pretended to blow his brains out.
"Ash!" Jo glared at him. "Could you be more insensitive?"
"Sorry." He shrugged.
Dean winced as Jo cleaned the area around the wound on his stomach, getting ready to sew it shut. "No, Ash. I'm not gonna kill myself."
"Good. Don't know if you noticed, but there's an apocalypse going on. We could sure use your help."
"Yeah."
"And Dean?" Ash licked his lips. "Seriously, don't go checking out on us. You're family, okay? You're like my brother. And Jo is like your little sister…"
He trailed off as both Dean and Jo exchanged glances and burst into laughter. "Oh God, you're not- you didn't….you did, didn't you?" He seemed both flustered and amused. "Ellen is gonna kick your ass."
"Please don't tell her." Jo begged.
Ash put his hands up. "God, no. She'd probably shoot the messenger." He turned to walk out, but paused. "Please tell me you're using protection. Last thing we need is a baby Winchester."
"Yeah. Wrap it before you tap it, bro." Dean nodded.
"Good. Alright, I'll leave you two to play doctor." He winked, and left.
Jo was quiet as she stitched up Dean's cuts. He gritted his teeth, letting only small noises of pain escape his lips.
When she was finished, she sat there, running her fingers over his many scars.
"Hey," he said softly.
She looked up, tears in her eyes.
"I'm okay. Please don't worry about me, Jo."
"You're not though! You are so far from okay. Look at this!" She held up his wrist. "You are going to kill yourself!"
"No I'm not."
"You keep saying that, but I don't know anymore."
Dean looked down, not knowing what to say.
"We have something special, Dean. At least, I'd like to think so. You can't leave me, asshole." She tried to smile, but there was a pleading undertone to her voice.
"Come here." Dean kissed her forehead, and gently pulled her onto the bed with him. He wrapped his arms around her in a comforting embrace.
"I think I love you." Jo blurted out. She bit her lip, looking nervous.
"I love you too." Dean grinned, and nuzzled her neck.
They lay there unmoving for what seemed like forever.
There was love, but there was also so much pain...