Sailor Moon - The Order of Black

Chapter Twenty Two: Picking Up The Pieces

Originally published 09/08/2015

Gods, what a night. Rei slipped into the shrine's bathhouse quietly, careful to make as little noise as possible. Her grandfather had incredibly sensitive ears, even at his age, and she really didn't feel like talking right now. She stopped over the washbowl and stared into the mirror above; her own eyes stared back, splotches of blood staining the her skin around them. The Hunter's blood.

…there was a sound like the crack of thunder and the woman's head exploded in a wet mess of blood and tissue. It splashed against Rei's skin, warm and sticky, as the rest of the Hunter toppled into the water below…

A chill ran down her spine as she dipped a washcloth in the water and began dabbing at her skin. All but a few more stubborn spots were gone, cleared away by her previous attempts, but that didn't stop her stomach from performing another somersault as she relived it all again; she'd seen a lot of nasty things in her life, but watching as another human being's head exploded ranked right up there with the worst.

Rei couldn't blame Rinjirou for his actions, though. The Hunters obviously intended to kill them, making it a clear case of self-defence. Even his execution of the second wasn't entirely without reason. It kept her identity a secret; something she really didn't want the Order of Black to uncover. There was no doubt in her mind that the Hunter would have followed through on his threat, or how she would have fared if he had. No, what gave her pause was the way in which Rinjirou killed him. His cold, detached admission that he felt nothing when he pulled the trigger? It scared her.

She sighed wearily as she leaned forward to splash more water on her face. It didn't help; sleep was all she craved now, the only thing that would make her feel better. The cool night air hit her skin as she crept through the door once more and back into the courtyard, heading stealthily for her own room. She just needed to rest; put everything out of her mind for a few hours.

"At least it's over for now," the miko murmured, as she reached her door. "I can finally-" She spotted a familiar blonde sitting on her bed and groaned. "Oh, come on! What are you even doing here?"

"I was worried," Usagi hissed, covering a yawn with the back of her hand. "So I thought I'd wait here and make sure you made it back okay!"

Luna stepped out from behind her, looking just as sleepy herself. "You are okay, I trust?"

"Oh, yeah, I'm great." Rei managed to suppress her annoyance; Usagi was just being a good friend. "I am super tired though, so if you don't mind-"

The blonde sat upright, immediately alert. "Something happened, didn't it?"

Oh, damn it all, Rei thought sourly. I just want to sleep…

"Come on, Rei." Usagi's voice held just a hint of impatience, perhaps even an air of regal authority; she clearly wasn't about to just let this go. "Talk to me."

Rei sank down on the bed with an irritable sigh. "Fine. I found Rinjirou."

"And? That's a good thing, right?"

Funnily enough, now that she'd started it seemed she did want to talk after all. "The Hunters found us. They attacked us, and…and he killed them."

Usagi's face remained impassive but Rei was sure she heard a note of concern in her voice. "Oh."

"There's more, isn't there?" Luna asked. "Killing is unpleasant, yes, but you've all had to do so in the past...even if it was a last resort."

Rei nodded glumly. "You're right. It wasn't the fact that he killed them. I mean, of course it shocked me, but…" She could still scarcely believe it, even now. "It was the way he killed them. Especially the second one. Rinjirou was just so cold, so emotionless, he…he isn't the person I thought he was."

Luna was evidently unimpressed. "Well, we knew from the start he could be dangerous. Perhaps we should end our dealings with him? We hardly need a wanton killer in our midst."

"He's not!" Rei cursed her response immediately. It was too loud, too fast. Despite everything she'd seen that night she knew Rinjirou wasn't that; she could feel it in her heart. I have to clarify what I'm saying...but somehow take the focus off me again. "The Hunters knew who I was. They knew I was Sailor Mars."

That got their attention, Usagi in particular. "What? How?!"

"I guess they were there for a while, watching us while we talked." The miko swallowed awkwardly, her throat suddenly dry. "One was killed instantly, the other incapacitated. He told Rinjirou and I he was going to report in if we let him live…and give the Order of Black my name. My location. He said they'd use me to find the rest of you."

Luna's face fell. "Rei…"

"That's when Rinjirou did it. He just stepped forward and shot him. Twice. No hesitation. No remorse. Nothing."

Usagi squeezed her forearm gently. "I'm sorry, Rei. That must have been an awful to watch."

"It was," she agreed, strangely relieved to have spoken about it, "But maybe it was best I see this now. I'm not so sure it was ever going to work out between us…"

The blonde's right eyebrow rose slowly. "Oh?"

Rei froze up. Her slip was clearly not lost on Usagi at all. "Er, by us I obviously meant the group. As in, all of us. The Sailor Senshi as a team!"

Usagi raised a trembling finger towards her face. "Minako was right; you do like him!"

"She told you that?!" The miko's fingers clenched into a tight fist. "I'm going to kill her…"

"Do whatever you think you have to. It won't change the fact that you have feelings for Rinjirou!"

Luna sighed exasperatedly. "Usagi..."

"I…" Rei had denied it to this point, even to herself…but it seemed pointless now. He was gone, and after her reaction at the docks she doubted he was coming back. "I do. At least, I did...before all this. Now, I don't know how I feel."

Usagi nodded mutely and motioned for her to continue.

"I don't know why. He literally makes me sick with his presence and yet, now that he's not here...I miss him. Perhaps I just got used to having him around or…" Rei trailed off, unable to finish as she stared back at Usagi in genuine confusion. "What I saw, how we left things; how could we ever come back from that?"

"I can't tell you that," Usagi admitted, chewing on her bottom lip thoughtfully. "It was hard for me when we lost Mamoru to Beryl...and he did all those awful things. I guess I just remembered why my love for him was so strong and-"

"I never said anything about love, Odango," Rei muttered defensively. "That was all you."

"Fine, fine. Like then."

"There's a pretty big difference either way," she countered. "Mamoru had been captured by the enemy and brainwashed. He wasn't himself. Rinjirou, he…he's-"

Titus landed on the windowsill beside the bed with his typical silence. "Not like you."

Rei jumped, immediately embarrassed by her reaction. Still, it could have been worse; Usagi fell off the bed with a frightened shriek. "Damn it, Titus! What have we told you about sneaking up on us?"

Luna shook her head in apparent disgust. "Idiot."

"That's right," Usagi grumbled, before groaning painfully. "Bad cat!"

He ducked as one of Rei's loose shoes hit the wall by his head. "By Selene, why must everyone insist on throwing shoes of late?!"

Rei was dubious. "Everyone?"

"Oh, he's exaggerating," the blonde muttered, eyeing off another shoe. "Minako threw both of hers the other day when he wouldn't shut up."

"Ami, too," Titus said quietly, with a twitch of his tail.

Usagi's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "Why? What did you do now?"

"That's not important," Rei growled, before turning to Titus. "And you! Why are you even here?"

"I simply wished to confirm you'd returned home safely," the cat said, somewhat evasively. "Once outside, though, I couldn't help but overhear your conversation and I must say, as infuriating as Rinjirou can be, I don't believe you're being entirely objective in your response."

Rei held out her hand. "Usagi? Shoe."

His ears pricked up in surprise. "Now wait just a moment! All I'm saying is, while you all have my utmost respect, you can be somewhat…naïve."

"We'll throw together," Usagi declared, pressing a heel into her palm. "On three."

"I'm trying to help here!" he protested. "People die. It's unavoidable. I know you find that distasteful but it's a fact of life. There are certain moments, certain situations where you cannot save everyone...and you entered one tonight."

That's not it at all, Rei thought bitterly. He's missing the point just like Usagi and Luna.

"It isn't that he killed someone," Luna countered. "He executed them!"

"Yes, he did. Rinjirou effectively committed murder." Titus' tail twitched a second time. "So what? He protected Rei's identity from the Order of Black in doing so and that of Usagi and the others...however indirectly. I can't say I'll lose any sleep over that."

Luna's tail puffed up dramatically. "So you're saying he was right to kill them?!"

"I'm saying nothing of the sort," he retorted, with a dismissive snort. "This isn't about right or wrong, Luna; it's a matter of choice. Cause and effect. Somebody was going to die tonight and I won't feign sorrow at the fact it was an enemy over a friend."

"You're all wrong." Rei fell backwards onto the bed behind her with another weary sigh. "I don't care that he killed them. Not anymore. That part makes sense. It's his lack of reaction that worries me. I just wish...I wish he'd felt something. Given some sign that he's still actually human on the inside and not just some puppet of Chaos."

Usagi offered a sad smile. "Are you sure he didn't?"

"He admitted it right to my face, Usagi. He said he used to feel a long time ago…but not anymore."

The room went silent. Even Usagi had nothing to say, no words of encouragement or cheer. Rei was hardly surprised; what could you say to that? Rinjirou made it clear he felt nothing. It's as simple as that.

Reassurance eventually came from a surprising source, however; Titus. "Perhaps, deep down inside…he did."

Rei's breath caught in her throat. "What do you mean?"

"I...have some experience with such matters," he admitted. "You'll recall when we first met I was rather more...evasive."

"As opposed to now?" Luna grumbled.

"I was Queen Serenity's spymaster for many years. That required certain sacrifices on my part, morals chief among them. When I awoke in this time I set about preparing for the Revenant Knight's arrival the only way I knew how; getting Corey ready. I placed a memory block in his mind, effectively silencing the part of him that was Corval. I did a similar thing to Minako without hesitation or remorse. I lied to you all when we first met, then continued to do so more times than I care to admit. I even lied to Corey, a man I consider my best friend, for more than three years without so much as batting an eyelid. All because I thought it was necessary, that the mission demanded it." The cat was strangely vulnerable in the moment, a far cry from his typical smug self. "Of course, I was eventually proven wrong which made it all the worse...but that's beside the point. I mean to say with enough effort, enough dedication...you can learn to block out almost anything. Even your own conscience."

Rei sat up slowly, considering his point. "So you're saying...what? Maybe Rinjirou did feel something...but he's convinced himself he didn't?"

"I'm saying nothing of the sort," Titus replied, a faint smile flashing across his face. "I'm merely suggesting you might keep an open mind. After all, nobody is entirely what they seem. Nobody."

"Wow." A smile blossomed on Luna's face. "First Minako and now Rei? Twice in one week?" It quickly gave way to a suspicious frown. "Why are you being so nice lately?"

Usagi joined her in staring him down. "Yeah, it's a little weird."

"I…I'm not!" he argued. "I just...don't want to lose access to Rinjirou, that's all! He's a valuable source of high-priority intelligence, and if continuing his association with Rei keeps him happy I think we should seriously consider it!"

Rei was torn. He had been nice – nicer than usual, anyway – and given her some good advice. At the same time, she wasn't quite as impressed with his follow-up. "So, what? I'm some kind of prostitute now?!"

"I, er…" The cat stared at her in abject terror…and dove through the window, disappearing into the black of night without another word.

Luna sighed irritably. "He really is an idiot."

"Oh, he's not so bad," Usagi countered, with a casual shrug, "When he's not being a pompous jerk, at least."

Rei nodded as she closed her eyes. "He's given me a lot to think about, at any rate." She stifled a yawn, raising her hand to her mouth automatically. "Gods, I'm so tired."

The blonde pushed off the bed quickly and gestured to the door. "Right. Time for us to go, Luna."

The cat flashed Rei a gentle smile of her own. "Do try to get some rest. This will all work itself out in time, even if it doesn't seem that way right now."

The miko nodded wearily. "Thanks."

"I'll stop by tomorrow," Usagi called, as she slid the door open. "Just to check in. Okay?"

"Uh-huh." Rei lifted her hand and waved briefly. "Usagi?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you for being here tonight. It turns out I did need to talk after all."

"Don't mention it," Usagi replied. "Goodnight."

The door slid shut behind her...and Rei was finally alone. Rinjirou still dominated her thoughts but she was too tired to even try to deal with it now. She managed to unbutton her jeans and eventually kicked them off with far more effort than she was happy admitting. Her whole body felt heavy and lethargic; she couldn't even be bothered to finish changing before she slid under the sheets. A final yawn followed as she snuggled into her pillow before sleep claimed her at last.

Her final thought was one of concern. Are you struggling with this as much as I am?

Rinjirou took another swig from his stolen bottle of whiskey as he stared out at the sun, watching it rise behind Tokyo's unfamiliar skyline.

"Using Shadow Walker for petty shoplifting," he muttered. "Now that is something Mother would be ashamed of for sure."

A little over an hour before he'd lost the only person left in his life, the only one who was even remotely close to a friend; Rei. He wandered the city after leaving the docks, lost in a veritable sea of despair. After a brief pit-stop at an all-night liquor store he'd finished up here, atop a random apartment building. It seemed like as good a place as any to wallow in self-pity.

Rinjirou didn't drink often - and he wasn't drunk by any stretch of the imagination – but the whiskey was proving to be a great help in taking the edge off his pain; physical and emotional. He didn't want to feel and at the time alcohol seemed like the easiest way to accomplish his goal. Unfortunately, it wasn't doing a thing to stop him thinking about it all. It just hurt a little less.

First he lost Megumi, one of the only pleasant memories left from his childhood. Worse still were her words as she walked away; they left little doubt that she considered their friendship over. His ribs still ached from her earlier assault, a painful reminder of the arrogance he'd displayed. I thought it would be so easy, he thought bitterly. I was going to just walk back in there, expose the Watchful Eye...and all would be forgiven. But even Megumi wouldn't hear me out. I was a fool. A sad, naïve fool.

Then there was Rei. If Rinjirou was really, truly honest with himself…he did care for her. Losing her after all that turmoil hurt almost more than he could bear. I don't care that she's a Sailor Senshi. I don't care how annoying she can be. I'd give anything for just one more chance to talk to her, to tell her how I feel…but she made it clear she doesn't want to see me again.

He leaned back against the wall behind him and closed his eyes, trying to will the pain away. I just want to forget it. All of it.

It came as it had twice before now; a soft, almost imperceptible whisper. "You have nothing left…"

"Leave me be." Rinjirou had zero interest in dealing with it again. Even if it was right.

"Nothing…but vengeance."

"Vengeance?" It was an interesting notion. The Order of Black had taken everything from him, every last person he cared about...but would he really go to war with them?

"You've tasted my power. We could tear down the Order of Black, you and I. Haim, Harcourt, and the Watchful Eye itself; we could destroy anyone who's ever hurt you."

There was one immediate problem with that line of thinking; Megumi. He didn't want to hurt her, even after everything that had happened that night. I wronged her, he told himself, regardless of intent. I was insensitive, I didn't notice her feelings. Perhaps I even drove her straight to the Watchful Eye. The former Paladin took another swig from the bottle but it had little effect on the resurgent guilt swelling in his chest; her face sprang up in his thoughts and he knew it was impossible. I can't fight her.

"She is the enemy now. You heard her, Rinjirou; don't be a fool. She won't hesitate the next time you meet." It was growing stronger; he was certain he could actually hear it now. "She calls you a traitor but she was the one who turned on you. Her and the rest of the Order."

"No, I…" It was odd but the longer they spoke the more sense it seemed to make. Perhaps he should wage war on the Order. Vengeance was as good a purpose as any to fill the void in his heart, and the second Chaos Sliver would make him virtually unstoppable.

"Yes," it called. "You begin to see the possibilities at last. You just have to let me in, Rinjirou. You just have to accept the gift I offer…"

A new voice interrupted them. "No! You offer nothing but pain and misery, creature, and you'll not have him. Begone!"

"He is MINE!"

"Not yet!" A flare of brilliant light followed her reply…and the voice was silenced.

Its presence withdrew like a numbing cold; he wasn't even aware it was there until it was gone. Then, a familiar hand brushed his cheek. It couldn't be her, though; he didn't believe in ghosts.

"Rin? Look at me."

He opened his eyes almost reluctantly…and found himself staring up at his mother's smiling face. She was just as he remembered her. Tall and slender, her long black hair tied back in a ponytail...save for two thin strands that framed her face. Her smile was what he remembered best; he'd seen it countless times since her passing in his dreams.

"Look at you," she whispered, cupping his cheek. "You're all grown up now…and so handsome."

"Mother?" Rinjirou glanced down at the bottle in his hand and tossed it aside. "But, you...you're dead."

"Hush." She dropped to her knees and wrapping him in a warm hug. "Don't trouble yourself with such thoughts. You needed me…and I'm here. Isn't that enough?"

She was right. It was more than enough; even if he was just hallucinating. "I never stopped needing you, Mother."

"I know, Rin. I know."

"I've lost everything," he confessed. "You. Dad. Megumi. Even my very purpose. Those bastards took it all."

"I had hoped you wouldn't follow in my footsteps," she said softly, "If I'd had more time to prepare, to warn you of what I'd learned before they..."

"Before they murdered you," he murmured, a familiar pain in his heart. I first felt it when I was eight...the day she died. "I feel so stupid now. So used."

His mother held him tighter, stroking his hair gently as she had when he was just a boy. "You aren't the first to be taken in by their lies, Rin, and you won't be the last. The Order and those who lead it are masters of deception; it's how they've managed to survive for so long. They appear noble, even righteous on the outside…but they are only human at the end of the day. Flawed and imperfect just like the rest of us." She paused a moment, and her voice returned stronger. "But Earth needs better. It deserves better."

"There's nobody like that left," he muttered bitterly, gently pulling away.

"No? Are you telling me you no longer care?"

His eyes widened. "Of course I care, but it's hopeless! I'm just one man. Without the Order, I'm-"

"Don't you dare give up, Rinjirou Payne!" A hint of steel underscored her words; the same voice she'd once used to scold him as a child. "I didn't raise you that way and neither did your father."

It felt like she'd slapped him across the face. "But-"

"You told me once you wanted to protect people," she said, with a sad frown. "Was that a lie?"

"No, but-"

"You say the Order took your purpose? Take it back!" Her eyes narrowed in determination once again. "You say you have nobody left? Find someone new to fight for!"

Someone new? Rinjirou found a familiar raven-haired girl popping into his thoughts. "Rei…"

"Rei?" his mother repeated, a faint smile playing across her lips. "Rei is…a girl?"

"Yeah." Somehow, he was embarrassed.

Her own smile was just as radiant as he remembered. "There's a girl you like?"

"There was," he admitted, suddenly deflated, "But I doubt she wants to see me again. I…I did some things, killed two Hunters. She was...upset. Disappointed in me and...I lost her."

His mother squeezed his shoulders gently. "Is she worth fighting for?"

The answer was clear right away. "She is. I don't know what I feel exactly, but Rei is…special. Even if she hates me right now."

"It sounds like you have more left than you realised. A girl and a purpose; more than many have in their lives." She ruffled his hair good-naturedly the way she used to. "So, come on, then. No more moping. You have more important things to do."

"You're right." He glanced at his discarded bottle of whiskey and grimaced. Never again. "Even if Rei just wants to yell at me…at least it means we're speaking again."

"That's the spirit," she said happily.

Rinjirou smiled up at her, dreading what he knew was coming. "I don't know if this was the alcohol or the blood loss…but I'm glad I got to see you again, Mother. Thank you for setting me straight."

"How could I stay away knowing the pain you were in?" She hesitated briefly, but finally leaned in to hug him once more. "Be strong, Rin. Pick yourself up the way I know you can. Regain your purpose. I can't say more, but…we may be able to meet again once you do."

"Mother?"

"There's a…an interested party who wants to meet you." Her sudden evasiveness was confusing. "It won't be easy but...when you're ready? They may be able to help you."

His brow furrowed in confusion. "You're not making any sense."

She began fading away before his very eyes. "I've said too much already. Just know that you are not alone, Rin, no matter how bleak things look. I'm watching over you…and I love you."

Rinjirou blinked and she was gone, leaving him alone on the rooftop. "I love you too, Mother." She'd left him with a lot to think about…even if he still wasn't entirely sure she was real. The voice was real though, of that he had no doubt. This was his third encounter with it and he wanted nothing more to do with its schemes. The Sliver rested in his back pocket, heavier than it had any right to be. Perhaps it would have been better to leave it on the pier but it seemed irresponsible at the time. It was dangerous; that was painfully obvious to him now.

"A purpose," he murmured. "My purpose was always to protect Earth. Perhaps that doesn't have to change. I'll need weapons, though, if I'm going to continue fighting. Armour." His gaze turned westward, towards the Order safe house he'd visited the night before. "And I think I know just where to get them." Some said returning to the scene of the crime was a classic mistake...but the Order would never expect such a move.

Real or not, his mother was right; he had to fight for what he held dear. "I'm done being a victim. Now it's the Order's turn."

Megumi ducked under the police tape with a nod to the nearby officer. He was an Order operative, the first to arrive on the scene. She wore plain clothes now – a black blouse and jeans under a long coat – and her ID marked her as a TMPD detective. She walked over to the first body and cringed as she looked him over. There was a gaping hole in his chest and another where his face should have been. Two rounds from his own revolver, she decided. What a way to go. Her head turned slowly, surveying the surrounding area; a small spatter pattern marked a likely point of death for his partner. From her own experience she guessed headshot - probably a third round from the same weapon - but she was no forensic specialist.

She was, however, a Black Paladin and a loyal member of the Watchful Eye; she had a job to do. The Order's contacts in TMPD would take care of any paperwork and destroy all traces of the armour, masks and weapons. Megumi's task was simple; retrieve the Chaos Slivers and any intel they may have on their person. She sighed as she tugged up her jeans and dropped into a crouch over the corpse. There was only one likely perpetrator. Rinjirou. It must have been him. He told me the Order sent the Watchful Eye after him...but I wasn't sure I believed him. Until now. They must have tracked him here after our fight in the alleyway…and tried to finish him.

That left her with mixed feelings. Her father had said nothing about their presence when he granted her leave to come to Tokyo. He'd said nothing about Rinjirou being alive, either, come to think of it…but he must have known. Why wouldn't he tell me? Why wouldn't he warn me what to expect? At odds with that was a faint sense of anger; two proud Paladins gunned down like common criminals. What had Rinjirou done to earn the Order's ire? Why did he deserve such treatment? And how could he murder his own so easily?

"I suppose it doesn't matter why they were here," she murmured. "Only those deserving are silenced." It was a grim task to end a fellow Paladin's life...but one that was not taken lightly.

Megumi didn't hate Rinjirou, despite her earlier words. She couldn't. She'd loved him for such a long time that it wasn't that simple. She was hurt, though. Hurt and betrayed. Seeing him with the red Senshi, the way he looked at her, the worry in his eyes? He had betrayed the Order of Black...and her as well. The truth was Megumi regretted ever coming to Japan in the first place...even if it had taught her a valuable lesson. Somehow, Rinjirou had uncovered the truth about the Watchful Eye…and his hatred of them was clear. If he couldn't understand, there would be others. Many in the Order, in fact, that would leave or even rebel. It would tear itself apart, a tragedy that would leave Earth at the mercy of the Moon Princess and her Sailor Senshi. That meant one thing, and one thing only.

"I made the right choice."

She drew her knife from the small of her back and cut into the corpse without further hesitation. The Chaos Sliver was easy enough to find if you knew what you were looking for…and with this brother dead it would do him no harm to remove it. It may well be a nasty business but it was a necessary one; one another brother or sister would perform on her the day she died. Such was the oath she'd sworn, the duty she'd vowed to uphold.

"After all…" she said softly, as she tugged the small, black stone from his flesh. "I live to serve the Black."

AN: So this was a really long wait between chapters, much longer than my usual, and I apologise. Lots of real life getting in the way along with a (un)healthy dose of writers' block made this one tricky to get right. I think I finally managed to get everything the way I wanted, so I hope it entertained. If the Rinjirou scene seemed a little weird it was by design; if he's not sure his mother was real then you guys certainly don't get to know either, lol.

Rei's scene was tricky once I remembered she outright killed Sailor Pain in Act II of Last Guardian Knight. Then, I realised she didn't have to be upset about the actual act of killing someone; she was upset at the complete disregard Rinjirou showed for life with his emotionless execution of the Hunter. Once that settled into place the rest of it just sort of wrote itself, including Titus' little moment of vulnerability. He does that every now and then; just writes himself and demonstrates he's not just some arrogant little douchebag. At least not ALL the time ;-)

Lastly, I finally got a moment to get into Megumi's head post-fight and explore where she's at. Unfortuntely, her and Rinjirou are sort of opposite sides of the same coin. The realisation that the Order was willing to kill those who served faithfully AS WELL as innocent people drove him away...while Megumi's sense of honour and duty allowed her to see things in a more pragmatic light. Rinjirou feared he drove her to the Watchful Eye and he may have done just that with the revelation he's alive. Either way, she's turning out to be a lot more complex in her motivations than I originally planned and I'm having a fun time writing her.

The wait wasn't a complete waste, either. I got a rough outline down of my major plot-points moving forward - at least a few chapters' worth - which hopefully means we won't hit another two-week wait for a while. As always, many thanks for your reviews and feedback as we enter the second act of Order of Black.

Lisseas