CHAPTER 1: Living A Lie

It was a dimly lit room with no furniture or any decorations, for that matter. Even the table that had been her sole companion in the basement had been taken away- sold, when the harshest of winters hit them that year. The floor was dusty, but she knew her father would no longer ask her to sweep it clean. In fact, he would not be asking her for anything any more.

Normally she would use the task as an excuse to come downstairs again to this place. A place that held so many memories she cherished. Faint scuff marks were scattered around on the ground- the only visible reminders of how she regularly crossed blades with her mother. Kallian flipped the blade over in her hand. Her fingers traced the elvish markings on its surface: Inethas. Fang.

The polished metal glinted in what little light there was in the room, reflecting the outline of a pale face. Dark eyes stared back, haunting and almost sinister in the shadows beneath brooding brows. Hair flowed down past her shoulders in elegant waves, styled to perfection. Fine powder smoothed out the skin. Kallian glared at the image in disgust and flung the dagger at the wall, not even bothering to hang the target up. She stood there watching the handle vibrate wildly. The action almost calmed her, as if the oscillations reminded her that it was still possible to live. To live without feeling, because the world went on regardless. She lived and she breathed. Wasn't that enough?

"Kallian?" called a muffled voice from the level above.

The elf sighed and wrenched the dagger free, sheathing it. She left the room and walked upstairs. Shianni was waiting for her when she got there, hands on her hips.

"Were you down there again?" she asked, tutting.

"Just for a minute," replied Kallian, smoothing out the wedding dress to hide the weapon.

Her cousin regarded her sympathetically before taking her arm. "Come on," she said, pulling her to the door. "Soris is waiting outside."

Shianni pushed open the door for her and Kallian stepped out onto the path. The faint smell of waste ridden water irritated her, but not to an unbearable extent. Years of living in this place had trained her senses to ignore this. Instead, she turned her gaze to the two people standing there. Soris grinned at her and waved her over.

Kallian drew near and tried not to step on the hem of her dress.

"Finally!" he said. "You look great, Kallian. What happened to you?"

Shianni made a disapproving noise. "What are you implying, Soris? She's always been this way."

"Just kidding," said her cheeky cousin. "Of course you always look fabulous."

Kallian wasn't really sure if this was sarcastic or not.

"And I bet someone else here will appreciate it- this is Nelaros, your betrothed," said Soris, gesturing at the elf next to him.

Kallian forced her lips into a smile at the smooth faced youth. Shianni wasn't lying. He was handsome with his sandy hair and sculpted features. But they did nothing to stir any emotion in her. He held out a hand. "So we finally meet. It is a great pleasure to meet you," he said, giving her a charming smile.

She raised an eyebrow. Good manners at least, she thought grudgingly.

"The pleasure is mine," she replied, albeit without enthusiasm. There, father. You would approve of this I hope.

Nelaros' smile stretched further. He offered her an arm and she hesitated before taking it. Soris gave her a wink as Nelaros took her on a brief walk through the streets.

"I have to say," he said, voice as smooth as his face. "I was nervous before arriving here. And now… let's just say I'm even more nervous to have met you in person."

"And why is that?"

Nelaros hesitated before answering. "You are… pleasing to the eye," he said, giving her a quick look of admiration. She wasn't sucked in by this so easily.

Wonder how many girls you've said that to.

"Trust me," she said wryly. "It's the make-up. And the hours my cousin spent trying to perfect my hair."

Kallian grimaced as she remembered waking up to see Shianni holding up her wedding dress. She had wanted to go straight back to bed.

Nelaros laughed. "Even so, I'm sure make up doesn't make everybody pretty," he said, blushing slightly. He continued to lead the conversation, talking about insignificant matters that she tried to give reasonable answers to. Kallian had to confess that he was charming and relatively easy to converse with, if a little long winded. But she had to give him points for the impeccable manners and flattering speech.

After a while, the small talk was beginning to try her patience and she fought down a yawn.

"I admit, I did have my doubts," he continued. "And I've thought about many things during the travel here. But… I just hope that I'll be a good husband for you."

Kallian stopped and studied him. Well… that was nice. But then again, she thought wearily. He probably thinks I'm some fragile girl who needs his protection. Maker's breath…

She resisted the urge to roll her eyes.

"I don't know what the definition of a good husband is," she said. "But… I think you'll be alright."

"Well," said the other elf, shoulders relaxing. "That makes me feel better. I'd hoped I would make a pleasing first impression."

Is that modesty, or is he being serious? "You don't need to worry about that. My cousin Shianni was gushing about you nonstop," she said. "And my father mentioned you were a smith. Tell me about that."

The elf was predictably eager to discuss his work, explaining some of the methods he used, the new materials he was trialling out and so on. Now this was more like it- she listened more attentively.

"So... Red Steel would have better armour penetration than Veridium."

"Yes," said Nelaros, nodding. "But when choosing swords there's something equally as important."

"The harmonic balance. It prevents the transmission of shock down to the wielder's hand. Am I correct?"

The male elf blinked. "You are indeed." Then he smiled widely. "I had no idea you were so interested in weapons."

They were near the vhenadahl now, and she frowned as a pair of elves smiled at her. She didn't know them, but the woman waved to her.

Nelaros followed her gaze and stopped. "It seems they want to talk to you… I won't take more of your time. We'll have plenty later, I suppose. You should spend it with others before… before we take our vows," he said with a quick smile.

Kallian nodded uncertainly, her attention already fragmented.

She walked over to the couple, wondering who they were. At the same time, she considered her betrothed seriously. The idea of marriage was beginning to feel like less of a dooming fate. Nelaros was nice enough and if he didn't treat her like a piece of pottery on the verge of shattering... it would have to be sufficient.

It was her father's expectation for Kallian to settle down at this age. Nelaros was the 'perfect' match for her- the son of a respected family, an accomplished smith, handsome and well mannered. The words had stuck in her throat at the suggestion- she could neither accept nor refuse. Her father had taken that for acceptance.

Furthermore, he was convinced that the union would tame the fiery nature in his daughter and squash that "unwomanly" gravitation toward violence.

"Well, it's the lucky bride herself! Hello, dear," said the woman when she arrived.

Her husband tutted. "Now, now, love. She probably doesn't remember us."

The woman gave her an apologetic look. "Oh! Of course. I'm Dilwyn, and this is Gethon. We were friends of your mother's. We haven't seen much of you since she…well…"

Kallian struggled to maintain a neutral expression. She angled her head, trying to remember. "Father never mentioned you."

Gethon grimaced. "No, he wouldn't, I suppose."

What is that supposed to mean?

"Adaia was beautiful and full of life," said Dilwyn, smiling. "And… a bit wild."

Her husband looked at Kallian sympathetically. "She wanted you more than anything. It's sad to see she never got to see you all grown up."

Dilwyn nodded. "We just wanted to see you today, and express our good wishes."

Kallian felt a familiar pang in the centre of her chest. She thought talking about her mother would be easy for her now, after so much time. To hear her name again caused a host of emotions and memories to surge up in her. She swallowed, nodding.

"Any friend of my mother's is a friend of mine."

"We're glad to have seen you, dear. Seeing you happy would be like seeing Adaia happy. You look so much like her… you have her eyes and her smile."

Gethon pulled something from his belt. "We've…saved a bit of money for this day. We'd like you to have it. To help you start your new life."

Kallian nearly choked. She couldn't breathe.

"I… I can't accept this."

"Please, take it. It's the least we can do for Adaia. To see you well supported would mean the world to us."

"Thank you...thank you for this."

"You are very welcome, child. Very welcome.," Dilwyn said, eyes soft.

"We hope you have a wonderful life with your husband. Maker bless you," said Gethon before walking away with his wife.

Kallian stood there for a while, staring at the pouch of coins in her hands. Life in the squalid conditions of the Alienage was a struggle every day. In the hovels crammed together, flanking the streets slick with mud, reeking of stale water and dung… there wasn't one family that didn't face the challenge of having to scrape together a few pennies to feed mouths. And this couple had saved these hard-earned coins… for her.

Suddenly the marriage meant more than a simple union between two strangers- it was a privilege. One of the few things in this forsaken place that was celebrated with such excitement and preparation.

Kallian walked along the streets, subdued. It was only until Soris tapped her on the shoulder that she came back to reality.

"Woa," her cousin said. "You alright? You look like you've been to the Fade and back."

Kallian shook her head. "No, I just… met some people who knew my mother."

The cheeky grin slipped off his face. "Your mother?" he asked, frowning.

She held up the pouch. "They gifted this to me."

Soris looked at it quietly before nodding seriously. "Must have been good friends, then."

Kallian nodded slowly. "Sounded like they knew her well."

He worked the muscles of his face, trying to drag his lips up into a smile for her. "Well, I'm happy for you cousin. You'll be needing this."

Again, Kallian nodded absent mindedly.

"But that aside, how was your little walk with your betrothed?" he asked with a sly grin.

"He's nice."

"That's it?" said Soris incredulously. "Geez, what does it take to impress you?"

"Someone who has substance," said a teasing voice behind them.

Kallian turned to her red haired cousin.

"Maker! When did you get here?" said Soris, jumping.

Shianni ignored him. "But really, Kallian. You are so lucky! I wish I could have a husband like him."

"That's easy for you to say… I've known him for what, a few minutes?"

Soris laughed. "True, but that's the point- you'll get to know him in time."

"That's the part I don't like."

"Ah, you think too much. Just go with the flow. Besides, he seemed pretty into you. What's the problem?"

"The problem," said Shianni. "Is that she doesn't give her heart away to just anybody."

"Yeah, I figured," snorted Soris. "Wait…" he said, eyes widening. He leaned in close, lowering his voice. "You don't happen to have a… lover, do you?"

Kallian shook her head. Not since a long time ago…

"Well, what is it then?"

Shianni rolled her eyes in exasperation. "Come on, Soris. We've already been through this." She gave him a meaningful look.

He caught the expression and opened his mouth. "Ohhh, right. That," he said awkwardly. "But come on, at least he's attractive. That will make it more bearable."

Kallian laughed humourlessly. "It's not that simple."

"Leave her alone," said Shianni, tutting. "It's hard enough for her now as it is."

Soris shrugged. "Alright… but hey, I was just curious." He held up his hands in surrender when the two of them glared at him. "Look, after this we'll drink away the marriage blues. What do you say to that?"

Kallian couldn't help it. She smirked. "Fine. But you're paying."

Her cousin grinned back. "That was my plan all along."

The three of them laughed and chatted as they always did. It suddenly occurred to her that it would be the last time they would be talking like this, together. She would be leaving for Highever and begin her life as a dutiful wife. But for the moment, she found herself forgetting about the wedding as they bantered. It was just her, Shianni and Soris enjoying another day, out in the sun.

"By the way…" she said to her cousins uncomfortably. "Just... don't mention what we were talking about to my father, alright?"

It was Shianni's turn to look at her incredulously. "Are you crazy? Better you tell him than us. Besides, it won't matter anyway… you're still getting married, right?"

Kallian nodded. "Yeah… I suppose I am."

Then the three stopped in their tracks abruptly. A group of shems stood smiling nastily on the path up ahead. The tallest one was garbed in a rich doublet, smooth pants and polished leather boots that were probably worth ten times more than her house. He was grappling with Nola, one of the bridesmaids.

This sort of display wasn't uncommon in the Alienage, and they were distasteful methods of demonstrating dominance typical of shems. But they had rarely been done in the case of an important event- least of all a wedding. Kallian stiffened, her blood hot with anger. Seeing the man grope Nola like that brought back memories of something painfully similar from years ago…

The girl made desperate noises of struggle and pulled herself away from his grip.

"Let go of me! Stop, please!"

The human gave the group of elves a look of disdain. "It's a party, isn't it?" He glanced at his two other companions and smiled. "Grab a whore and have a good time!" he said, laughing.

I'll show you what a good time looks like you bastard, she thought, but Shianni seemed to know and put a hand on her arm.

"Savour the hunt, boys," drawled the man. "Take this little elven wench here…" he said, and Kallian felt her insides freeze as he gestured at Shianni. "So young and vulnerable."

Before she could even take a step forward, her cousin eyed him disgustedly. "Touch me and I'll gut you, you pig!"

A by-stander held up both hands in an attempt to pacify them. "Please, my lords! We're celebrating weddings here!"

The shem leader quickly approached the elf in two long steps. "Silence, worm!" he snarled, striking his face with a heavy hand.

There were startled cries from the group as the girls watched in horror. Kallian held shaking fists by her sides. Soris noticed her expression and the clenched fists. He sidled over to her.

"I know what you're thinking," he whispered. "But maybe we shouldn't get involved."

Kallian didn't look at him, keeping a seething gaze on the shem. "I can't let them abuse us like this," she hissed in a low voice.

"Fine. But let's try to be diplomatic, shall we?"

The shem was turning away from the fallen elf now, walking towards Kallian.

"Ah, what's this? Another lovely one come to keep me company?"

Kallian's fingers closed around the hilt of her dagger hidden at her hip. She gave him a cold smile. "We both know that's not going to happen. Or maybe you don't know what a wedding dress looks like? I'm not surprised… your brain must be smaller than a rat's."

"Never mind," muttered Soris.

"Hah!" scoffed the noble. "Do you have any idea who I am?" he said, taking a step forward menacingly.

Soris shook his head desperately at something past her and Kallian frowned. She turned her gaze to the right and glimpsed a blur of white as Shianni hurled a pot at the man's head. It shattered and the shem's head bled like a fountain. He collapsed to the ground, unconscious.

Another shem hurried to his side and gaped at them. "Are you insane? This is Vaughn Urien, the Arl of Denerim's son!"

Shit.

"W-what?" said Shianni, staggering backwards. She covered her face with her hands. "Oh, Maker!"

"Then his father should have taught him some manners," said Kallian, eyes flashing.

The remaining human glared at her. "You've got a lot of nerve, knife ears! This'll go badly for you!" And with that, the two heaved Vaughn onto their shoulders and left.

The crowd of elves dispersed, tutting and sighing. A deep sense of foreboding churned in Kallian as she watched them go.

Shianni shook her head as she turned to her cousins. "Oh, I really messed up this time," she groaned.

"Once again… your actions never fail to surprise me," said Kallian dryly.

"It'll be alright," said Soris, though he looked uncertain. "He won't tell anyone an elven woman took him down."

"I… I hope so," said Shianni weakly. "I should get cleaned up."

"I'll come with you," offered Kallian, but her cousin shook her head.

"No, you should go get ready for the wedding. I'll join you soon."

Kallian sighed, seeing her cousin's slumped shoulders as she walked away.

"Just what the hell were they doing here?" she growled, stalking off to the central square. Soris followed her, shaking his head.

"Don't let your father catch you doing that," he said.

"What?"

"You know, walking like that. Marching."

Kallian gave him a withering look. "Do you think I care about that right now?"

"Okay, you're right." Her cousin sighed. "But what can we do? We've always known they would brew up something here sometime in the future."

"But at a wedding? They really have to stoop down that low?"

Soris' face hardened . "I have to agree with you on that… it seems we're dealing with shems that don't care, one way or another." Then he slid to a stop.

Kallian glanced back at him quizzically.

"Uh… don't look just now, but we have another problem."

"What now?"

Soris' eyes narrowed. "Another human just walked in. Could be one of Vaughn's… or just a random troublemaker."

Kallian didn't waste time following his advice. She turned her gaze to a tall figure behind the trunk of the Vhenadahl. He was armoured with a heavy breastplate, gauntlets and a long sword strapped to his back. His skin was dark, long black hair tied back into a warrior's tail and his face was disturbingly composed- he had practised this for years. The shem scanned the area and caught her looking. Kallian jumped reflexively, as if burned with fire. She quickly averted her eyes and strode away.

The crowd there was larger now, and she felt herself stiffen from nervousness. Soris walked beside her, patting her shoulder.

"If it's any comfort," he said, voice low. "I'm as anxious as you, cousin."

Kallian nodded, swallowing.

Before she could get to the crowd, however, she heard Valendrian call out to her.

"Ah! Kallian, my child. I just wanted to introduce you to our guest here."

The elf stopped, turning to meet the weathered face of the Elder. He laid a hand on her upper back, guiding her towards- to her shock- the Rivaini human. She exchanged a bewildered glance with Soris but had no choice in the matter. When they reached the shem, he turned those unsettling dark eyes on her. She met them with a guarded, simmering gaze of her own. After the run in with Vaughn, the sight of another human made her sick.

"This is Duncan, head of the Grey Wardens in Ferelden."

"Pleased to meet you," said the Warden, his voice mild and polite. He stretched out a hand but the elf didn't take it.

"You'll excuse me, Warden," said Kallian stiffly. "We've just had… an unpleasant encounter with one of your kind. I can't say your presence is welcome to me."

To her surprise, the hint of a smile crossed his lips.

Valendrian gave her a look of disapproval. "Kallian, the Grey Wardens are deserving of respect, no matter who wears their crest."

Duncan held up a hand. "It is quite alright, my friend. You were not exaggerating when you told me of her fiery temper. I can see it in her eyes."

The Elder sighed. "Yes, well… she can be a difficult student to control."

Kallian rolled her eyes at her tutor. "Only when you make me read fragmented elvish."

Valendrian shook his head. "We can only do the best with the resources we have."

"Yes, I know… But tell me," she said, turning to the Warden. She crossed her arms and regarded him challengingly. "Why are you here?"

She ignored the Elder's sigh of exasperation.

At this question, Duncan's composed face slipped into grim lines. "The worst has happened," he said in a heavy tone. "A Blight has begun."

Kallian's brows climbed in surprise. "A Blight?"

She had only read about this in her books and the stories her father retold at the dinner table. Swarms of armies, Darkspawn teeming like ants across the land… wiping out villages, killing them. This couldn't be the Blight. The Blight that everyone feared.

Duncan nodded. "King Cailan summons the Grey Wardens to Ostagar to fight the Darkspawn horde alongside his armies."

Maker…

"Yes… I had heard the news. Still, this is an awkward time. There is to be a wedding… two, in fact," said the Elder.

"So I see," said the Warden. "By all means, attend to your ceremonies. My concerns can wait, for now."

Valendrian nodded, turning to Kallian. "Child, I want you to treat Duncan as a guest," he said, giving her a warning look. "And, quickly now, take your place." He left to join the crowd.

Kallian gave the Warden a stiff nod and followed him to the wooden platform. As she did, Shianni winked at her and smiled.

"You look gorgeous in that dress, cousin."

"Urgh," said Kallian, grimacing. "This better be the last time I'm wearing one."

As she took her position beside Nelaros, she saw her father's proud, smiling face in the crowd. She tried to return it but failed.

"Are you ready?" asked her groom, giving her an encouraging smile.

His expression worsened the guilt squirming in her- the guilt that despite any ring or declaration, she was going to be living a lie.

But she nodded. "Ready."

"Looks like Valendrian and the Revered Mother are here. Time to face the music," said Soris.

The Elder stepped forward to face everyone gathered, walking along the edge of the platform.

"Friends and family," he started, deep voice ringing in the air. "Today we celebrate not only this joining, but also the bonding of kin and kind …"

The rest of his speech passed through her ears, scattered and disjointed as Kallian felt the reality of what was happening.

This is it, she thought. It's really happening. I'm going to be married… leaving father, Shianni and Soris and Denerim… to live with someone I don't even know.

She spotted her father again, giving her an approving nod. She had to do it. She had to do her duty.

"In the name of the Maker, who brought us this world, and in whose name we say the Chant of Light, I-"

Kallian was jolted out of her reverie at the sound of heavy footsteps. What she lifted her head to see made sweat break out on her forehead.

"M-milord," stammered the Mother. "This is an unexpected surprise."

Vaughn strode purposely up the steps with a group of armed soldiers in tow.

Bloody hell… you can't be serious.

"Sorry to interrupt, Mother. I'm…" he laughed harshly. "I'm having a party, and we're dreadfully short of female guests."

The Mother shook her head angrily. "Milord! This is a wedding!"

Vaughn laughed again. "If you want to dress up your pets and have tea parties, that's your business, not mine. And don't pretend this is a proper wedding."

He turned to place his filthy hand on Kallian's shoulder. She wanted to smack it away.

"Now…" he said, smiling evilly. "We're here for a good time, aren't we boys? Let's take that one, and the one in the tight dress. And where's the bitch who bottled me?"

Kallian's fingers curled into tight fists. No. Not Shianni you mongrel.

Her cousin struggled and pulled away from one of the shems. "Don't touch me you son of a-"

"Oh! I'll enjoy taming her!" said Vaughn, laughing again. "And… the pretty bride," he added, giving her a lustful glance.

Kallian felt her gut twist horribly. She wanted to vomit.

Nelaros turned to her, determination in his eyes. "Don't worry, I won't let them take you."

"I can't let him take Shianni," she hissed.

"Ah yes, such a well formed little thing," the noble drawled, turning to Kallian.

"Get away from her, you villain!" shouted Nelaros as Vaughn drew near.

"That's quite enough. We don't want any further… unpleasantness."

Kallian thought about taking her dagger out. She would wipe that smirk off his disgusting face.

"If you lay one finger on me," she said through gritted teeth. "I'll skin you alive."

"Oh, this one has spirit," he said. Then the shem's eyes hardened and he raised a hand to strike her. His expression switched to surprise when she dodged it and smacked his arm down at the bone.

"Argh!" he growled, doubling over.

Kallian punched him in the face and tried to kick him, but the dress was a limiting factor. She felt hands grab her roughly and she snapped her head back. One pair of hands fell away and she heard a pained groan. The elf tried to twist out of their grasp…

And then, the last thing she saw was a gloved hand coming full speed at her face.

Everything went black.