What's Real

~Chapter 7~

At some point during the story, the pair turned onto their sides to face each other, their bodies so close that Katniss could feel the heat radiating off of Peeta. She wanted so much to feel him hold her, get closer to him and wrap herself in his arms, but she knew that she probably shouldn't. Not while she was telling him this story. He stayed silent as she spoke grasped her hand in his when she hesitated on telling him about how he'd saved her before the games and how she'd kept noticing him after that. And he never let go.

Her hands got sweaty with nerves as the story progressed and she felt that she would lose him if she said anything odd about her thoughts on him- her feelings for him- but he kept her eyes locked on his, and this encouraged her to speak the whole truth, to show him just what happened to her.

She thought it must be scary for him to listen to what she was saying. No normal person would have to deal with a delusional girl who was confessing her undying love to him through a story of a life that she created inside of her head. But he hid his apprehension well, seeing as he didn't look the slightest bit concerned over the parts about their 'love story.' Towards the end of her tale, he looked to be split between smiling warmly and watching her with despair in his eyes. She'd stuttered over the fact that they'd had two children and grew redder than she ever thought possible when he'd asked her what their children's names were. And when her story was finished, she didn't know what else to say to the boy who was watching her so intently.

Slowly, Peeta untangled his fingers from hers and lifted his hand to brush her fly-away strands of hair behind her ear. She sighed as his fingers brushed across her cheek, down her jaw and finally settled his fingers beneath her chin, using his thumb to brush the skin of her bottom lip. The breath caught in her chest.

"That must've been difficult to go through," he finally said, his voice barely louder than a whisper. "And waking up after going through all of that must've been just as terrifying."

Katniss felt her bottom lip tremble beneath Peeta's thumb as her eyes began to water. "It wasn't fair! After all that we'd gone through, after all the hoops we jumped through to be together, it was all for nothing. Because you weren't there and you didn't even know me-"

"But I did know you. We've shared classes since we started school in Kindergarten. I'd say we were pretty good friends."

Katniss blinked, mulling over the new information. "We knew each other?"

Peeta nodded.

"So, you do sleep with the window open?"

"Yes."

"You're an artist? Don't take anything in your tea?"

"Both correct."

"Double-knot your shoelaces?"

He looked over to his shoes. "Check."

She bit her lip. "Favorite color is orange?"

He grinned widely. "I would've thought you'd ask that first."

Katniss blushed bright red as Peeta's hand trailed down her arm and back into the grasp of her own. She squeezed his hand as he smiled back at her.

"I'm so glad I haven't scared you away," she breathed.

"You could never do that, Katniss."

They stared at each other. The sun sunk lower, and when it was halfway below the horizon, Peeta spoke up once more. "We should get you home."

Katniss' heart fell. For some reason, she was hoping that he would want to be with her after she told the story. She'd hoped that he was just hiding his feelings for her, confused on whether or not he had a chance.

"Okay," she whispered.

After a moment, she grabbed the remnants of their picnic and placed them all in the basket. With Peeta's help, they were walking back to her home in no time, the silence between them slightly tense. Katniss felt like she'd ruined the atmosphere they were able to build between themselves. And really, the fact that she was so disappointed could only be blamed on herself. She shouldn't have expected anything different to occur between the two of them. She shouldn't have hoped for a kiss or a confession of his deepest feelings for her. It was just a story that she made up, a romance that she herself longed for over the years. It had nothing to do with his actual feelings. Nothing would change if he didn't feel the same for her.

However, as they walked, she noticed that he was a bit too quiet. Usually, their silences would only last a few minutes, some conversation weaving its way between silences here and there. However, they were about halfway to Katniss' house and he still hadn't said anything. He was obviously thinking about something- about what she said. Maybe he really was freaked out about her dream.

By the time the pair reached her front door, Katniss was in full panic. She couldn't stop the barely noticeable shake in her hands and her fingers toyed with her brained uncontrollably. All she wanted was the disappear inside her room and wallow in her misery. She wouldn't be able to show her face in front of Peeta for a couple of days without getting flustered. She wondered if he would notice if she ignored him.

Peeta cleared his throat and Katniss turned to face him. They were standing in front of her door, Katniss' hand frozen in place hovering above the doorknob. He looked nervous, his cheeks heated red. His mouth opened and closed, not a sound coming out. She grew concerned as this action carried on a few more times. Peeta always knew what to say, so why was he struggling so much?

He cleared his throat again and bit his bottom lip as Katniss' hand fell back to her side. Her body turned fully towards him and she cocked her head to the side as if asking silently what was on his mind.

His hands reached forward and grasped her own, pulling her closer to his body until she could feel the heat emanating from him. His voice was raspy when he spoke, "you said that in your dream, you loved me?"

Her eyes widened at his question. With a tight voice, she answered, "real."

He took a deep breath and nodded, his eyes never leaving hers. "And your feelings now…?"

Katniss' cheeks grew dark and her eyes darted down to their feet. "They're the same as then."

Peeta let go of one of her hands and used his free fingers to gently nudge her chin up so that she was looking into his eyes. "Good. Because they're real for me."

And along with those words that made her heart flutter came a kiss.

Real or not real

The rest of her night passed in a daze. She barely listened to anything her parents said and Prim was trying to tease her about her time with Peeta. She barely registered a thing they said, sighing quiet, one worded responses to their questions. And she could see the way her family was grinning at her- as if they knew something that she hadn't told them about- but she didn't feel the need to ask them why they were acting that way. She was comfortable with her thoughts and the lingering feeling of Peeta's lips on hers.

As she was laying in her bed to sleep, Prim quietly made her way into Katniss' room after switching on the light, bouncing onto the older girl's bed with a large grin on her face.

"So how was it like?" Prim asked, eyes glowing with curiosity.

Katniss folded her arms behind her head and raised an eyebrow at her younger sister. "What do you mean?"

She giggled. "The kiss!"

Katniss' eyes widened as she sat up onto her elbows. "You saw it?"

Prim's cheeks flushed red. "We all did. We were going to open the door to let you both in, but…"

Katniss groaned and fell back onto her pillow. She buried her face into her pillow as she felt her face heat up. "Why did you keep watching?"

"It was so romantic!" Prim sighed. "It's like your dream of being with him is turning into a reality!"

"Prim, go away."

"But you need to tell me how you know him! I didn't know you two were so close! I want to know why you never told me of your crush on him."

Katniss sat up and turned to her younger sister, resting her back against the headboard. "Maybe I didn't know about my crush until I was in the coma."

"Or," Prim grinned, "you were just denying it until you couldn't."

Katniss rolled her eyes.

"So tell me," Prim giggled, "how did it feel? Is he a good kisser?"

"Prim!" Katniss' face burned hotter than she'd ever felt.

Prim laughed and jumped up from the bed. "Think about it and tell me tomorrow on our way to school!"

And with a final laugh, Prim was out of her door and the light was switched off once more.

Katniss sighed as she flopped onto her back and pulled up her blankets to beneath her chin. He thoughts wandered back to the time she'd spent with Peeta that afternoon, to the kiss they shared just before he left. His lips were soft against her own. He was warm and smelt of cinnamon, dill, himself. She wanted to kiss him again and again. It was even better than kissing him in her dream. Her heart thundered at the thought of his lips on her own, his arms wrapped around her body. She sighed as she closed her eyes and willed herself to fall asleep to the thoughts of Peeta and his perfect kisses.

Real or not real

When she made it to school the next day, Peeta was waiting for her by her locker. His cheeks were flushed and Katniss could feel the color marking her own as well. She smiled at him shyly as she unlocked her locker and began replacing the books in her bag with those she would need for the next few classes. As soon as she closed the door, Peeta gently took her hand and walked with her to their first class.

He stood beside her when she sat at her desk, biting his lip whilst shuffling nervously on his feet. He looked as if he wanted to say something and Katniss felt like she knew what he wanted to talk about. However, just as he got the nerve to open his mouth, the bell rang and students began to fill the empty seats of the classroom.

Peeta sighed, his brows furrowing into a scowl. Katniss couldn't repress her smile at the sight; he looked so odd with any expression that even slightly implied negative emotions. She reached out to one of his clenched hands and squeezed it gently in hers. "We'll talk during lunch?"

Peeta looked up at her with gratitude laced in his features. He nodded and awkwardly shuffled to his seat. As he sat, the final bell rang and Wiress began their math lesson a few moments later.

Real or not real

Whenever classes switched, Peeta took it upon himself to walk her to class. They even sat together- sometimes in complete silence- when they shared the class and there was no need for Peeta to rush away. Katniss wondered why he didn't just talk to her in class when they were doing group work, but she figured Peeta didn't want to take up her study time, something she desperately needed, since she had so much to catch up on from the past few years.

Peeta proved himself to be an amazing tutor, as he helped Katniss with what she didn't understand whenever she so much as paused to stare at her work. His patience with her slow progress impressed Katniss, and she could only be happy that he was turning out the way she always thought him to be.

And, once in a while, he would hold her hand, his fingers gently caressing hers as he moved himself closer to her. She felt her heart flutter every time held her hand, and although he never held it for more than a few minutes, she felt as if she were in heaven.

When lunch finally rolled around, they decided not to head to the cafeteria, opting to sit outside on one of the benches lining the back fields of the school. They sat right beside each other, practically no space in between them. For a few moments it was silent, the pair taking a few bites of their lunches before bringing up the topic that so needed to be talked about. It was Peeta who was able to bring up his courage first.

"I really liked kissing you."

He stared at her in horror, his face burning bright red while Katniss flushed and laughed awkwardly.

Peeta stuttered, "I mean- I didn't mean to-! Well, I did like kissing you, but I didn't mean to say that!"

Katniss bit her lip, the corners of her lips rising into a smile. She placed her hand onto his and murmured, "calm down and try again."

Peeta wove his fingers between hers. "I meant to say that I really like you."

Katniss looked down at her lap and smiled. She took a deep breath and looked up at him from beneath her lashes before she responded, "and I like you."

They smiled at one another, sitting in silence as they enjoyed the feel of the others' hand in their own. This time, it was Katniss who spoke first: "I have a question."

Peeta blinked. "What is it?"

Katniss bit down on her lip. "Well, I know that I'm not exactly the easiest person to be around… Especially since I'm still trying to figure things out here. But, I know how I feel about you; I've known since I lost you the first time."

She looked up at him, trying her best to keep eye contact with him. Peeta looked dumbstruck, his cheeks still pink from his admission earlier. However, she could see something warm and hopeful in his eyes and she felt that was a good enough indicator that she should go on.

"I just," she stuttered, looking down at her knees and kicking her feet, "I want to be with you. And I want to know if you… want to be with me?"

It was silent for a beat before Peeta's incredulous voice was heard. "You mean as a couple?"

She whispered, "yes."

She didn't know how long the silence went on, but she felt her heart break with every beat it took without his reply. Eventually, she became so overwhelmed with her fright that tears began to well in her eyes.

"Hey," Peeta crooned, raising a hand and rubbing his thumb beneath her eye, "don't cry. I'm just overwhelmed. I never thought that the Katniss Everdeen would be asking me out. I never thought I'd have a chance with you."

She looked into his eyes and blinked. "What?"

Peeta's cheeks flushed slightly and he rubbed the back of his neck with the hand he'd used to rub her cheek. "I've always wanted to ask you out, but I never had the courage. Before your accident, we'd barely known each other."

Katniss clasped her hands together in her lap. "But we did know each other."

Peeta smiled. "Yeah." He looked down at his lap as he spoke. "Right before your accident, we were partners in a school project. It was the first time that I actually talked to you. We got along pretty well and I thought that I had a chance if I could get the courage to talk to you. But I guess I waited too long…"

Katniss grasped his hand and he looked at her with hopeful eyes. "No," she said, "you're just in time."

Real or not real

The two held hands the entire way to Katniss' next class. Katniss tried her best to ignore the stares- she'd never be used to the way people would watch her when she walked through the halls- and she pretended she couldn't see the angry glare that Glimmer sent her way as she passed her and her group of friends. Peeta squeezed her hand and gave her a reassuring smile, and Katniss was able to return the girl's glare with a hard look as they continued towards the music room. When the two got there, Delly was waiting outside for them, looking at the pair with a look of melancholy.

"So I guess you did it," Delly said as they stopped in front of her. "You got the girl."

Peeta's answering grin was bittersweet, "you knew how I feel about her, Dells."

Delly shrugged. "I know." She flung her arm around Katniss' shoulder and pulled the girl away from him, "But we'll still be best friends! Right Kat?"

Katniss bit her lip as she glanced back at Peeta. Things couldn't have gone any better.

Real or not real

To say that class was easy would be a lie; especially since Glimmer was trying her best to make Katniss' life a living hell. She didn't understand why the girl had to make things so personal. These were feelings that couldn't be denied any longer. Katniss and Peeta were supposed to be together, especially if their feelings outlasted a five year long coma and a world Katniss was stuck in within her head. She'd been waiting to be with Peeta for months after she woke up in a hospital bed with people telling her her husband didn't know who she was. And she finally had him. She wasn't about to let him go.

When the bell rang, she ran out of the room, waving to Delly and calling out her good-byes to the girl. She beat Peeta to the door of his classroom and pulled him into a chaste kiss before dragging him down the hall towards the entrance to the school. She waited with him impatiently for his brother before telling them to hurry up towards the middle school so they could pick up Prim. And when they got there, Katniss ran straight to Prim and squeezed her in a hug.

"I have so much to tell you, Little Duck!" Katniss breathed, smiling brightly at her younger sister.

The girl scrunched up her nose. "Ew, don't call me that! That was for when I was a kid!"

Katniss grinned. "Not a chance."

Katniss and Prim walked ahead of the two boys, discussing everything that happened since she woke up from her coma. They talked about the nightmares she sometimes still had, the euphoria she felt now that she was with Peeta, how overwhelmed with the world she felt when she was relearning her life in those first few months of wakefulness.

"Honestly, sometimes I wished I were still asleep, in my own little world," Katniss admitted, squeezing Prim's hand in hers. "I wanted to be with my Peeta so badly. I missed him. I couldn't sleep without him, live without him… I barely survived that first week without him."

Prim gave her a strained smile. "I'm glad you did."

Katniss looked back to see the boys laughing behind them. Peeta caught her eye and sent her a wonderfully beautiful smile. Katniss grinned. "Me too. It's like another chance. To do it all right."

Prim bit her lip. "But what if it doesn't work out in the end?"

Katniss looked to her feet and smiled warmly. "I know it will. I won't let us fall apart. I couldn't. Not again."

~Chapter 7 End~

Next chapter will be the epilogue. I believe I've done all I wanted with this fic and it definitely took much longer than I thought to get it finished. Sorry for the long hiatus in the middle; life got to me and I should have at least given all my readers a heads up. The epilogue will be up next month, so keep an eye out for it.