A/N: Ok, so just a couple of notes before we dive in. As I'm writing this, I'm realizing that Oliver's chapters will be more focused on the present day while Felicity's will contain more flashbacks. Mostly because Felicity's flashbacks are more interesting, but also because there's more story to tell on Felicity's end in the flashbacks. Most of Oliver's conflict will be in the present, brought on by Felicity's return, while the majority of Felicity's emotional turmoil in the present is a result of everything she's been through in the past, if that makes sense. So, there won't be as many flashbacks in these chapters as there will be in Felicity's.

Secondly, there will purposely be threads left dangling and unexplained from time to time, but they will be picked back up later. There's one in particular in this chapter that I'll talk more about at the end.

Also, in one of the reviews, it was suggested I include a summary of The Storm after the Calm (hereafter referred to as SATC) since it's been so long. That is an excellent idea, so here it is!

So, essentially, SATC observed canon up until 2.07 in regards to the Olicity relationship. I'm taking some license where Sara's relationship with the League is concerned. The timeline was set up so that Felicity's father was believed to have committed suicide six years ago, around the end of Oliver's first year on the island. He was supposed to have faked his death on the plane Fyers planned to blow up, but Oliver stopped the explosion, and thus Felicity's father was forced to fake his death through suicide. This puts SATC picking up seven years after Oliver was lost on the island.

Over the course of SATC, Team Arrow worked to dismantle a human trafficking ring that was revealed to be a cover for a larger cyber-crime spree. This spree was eventually tied to Isabel Rochev and her plans to dismantle Queen Consolidated. Along the way, Team Arrow fought against Isabel's cyber-crony, The Ghost, who was revealed to be Felicity's not-so-dead father. Turns out, he faked his death on Isabel's command and joined the League of Assassins to get trained. This meant he had a debt to pay off with the League.

His deal with the League permitted him to work with Isabel, but he had to stay in hiding. Felicity's association with the Arrow, though, brought him out of hiding to warn her away. He wanted her to work with him and Isabel, to be a part of the family he was building with Isabel. This prompted Sara to appear, assigned by the League to recapture their now-rogue asset. Sara deferred to Team Arrow's mission, to the League's chagrin.

Felicity convinced Isabel she was on board with the plan to dismantle QC behind Oliver's back, but she couldn't convince her father. Felicity and her father ended up in a cyber battle for control of the Queen Consolidated database. Felicity won and they assumed all was well. Until she and Oliver went back to the Queen Mansion to find out Felicity's father kidnapped Thea. He wanted a trade: Felicity for Thea. The team orchestrated Thea's rescue, pretending to play into his plans. They saved Thea, but Isabel showed up, having tracked Felicity's father's location. She plans to shoot Felicity, thereby removing the blood loyalty in her father's life. Instead, Felicity's father saves her by taking the bullet. He dies, and Felicity is left to figure out how to deal with the grief all over again. She doesn't get much time, though, because Nyssa appears with League force to tell Felicity her father's debt is carrying over to her. She must go with the League or they will take her by force. Despite their efforts to skirt around the debt, Felicity caves and disappears in the middle of the night to go to Nanda Parbat.

Wow, written out like that, SATC was one twisty, dramatic orgy haha.

Anyways, read on!

Chapter 3

To say he's floored is an understatement. In fact, he's about to ask her to repeat the words, to be sure he heard them correctly, when Roy beats him to it.

"What's a Ra's al Ghul and why does it want you dead?"

In any other situation, someone would have cracked a smile. As it stands, their faces remain immobile, Felicity shifting uncomfortably and looking as though she wants to be anywhere else. She's gotten steadily less controlled since she removed the mask and he isn't sure what to make of it. Her aloof demeanor is cracking, but there's no way of knowing what hides under the surface. She's unpredictable, and he hates unpredictable variables. There's too much potential for chaos and he's finally back to stability, or as close to it as he'll ever get.

In his panic, he failed to check his phone, but he's berating himself for that oversight now. His nerves are frayed as he powers on the device, waiting none-too-patiently for the messages to register.

His heart soars at the indication of a voicemail message, but the feeling quickly dims as he listens to what she left him with. The choked apology dashes his last hope that she didn't do what they've been fighting against. She gave up. She left him.

Anger overtakes him, and he hurls the phone at the wall with a roar, the device shattering against the concrete. It lays broken on the ground as he collapses into Felicity's chair and resigns himself to the realization that it's all over.

"Ra's is…" Felicity pauses, mulling over the best explanation for the man who ruined their lives. "I owed him a debt, but I ran before it was paid in full. Now, he's sending the League after me and everyone I love. He's already gotten to my mother and Sara. I can't let him hurt anyone else."

She looks to him beseechingly, real, true emotion in her eyes for the first time since her reappearance. There's no wall up, no guard keeping her at least partially in check, no barrier between them. She's looking at him almost like his Felicity used to, only with a greater edge of desperation. Whatever is going on, Ra's has her well and truly terrified. But still… her explanation leaves a lot to be desired. For instance…

"Where have you been all this time?" Oliver demands, his voice harsh even to his ears. "You said on the roof that you were only with the League for eleven months."

Felicity's flinch is barely contained and her eyes slip away from his, settling on the floor. "I was… Sara and I were on the run. She came to me before our last mission for the League, told me that Ra's planned to kill me once I'd outlived my usefulness. She said she wasn't going to let that happen, that we weren't returning."

She falls silent for a moment, seemingly lost in thought as she runs her hand lightly over the surface of the table she's leaning against. The way she's staring at it is almost as though she can't believe it's solid under her fingertips. Oliver has to fight the urge to reach out to her, to bring her back to the present. He's spiraled in his own thoughts far too often not to understand what's happening right now.

She comes back to reality with a visible start, scanning the foundry with alarm before relaxing back into the table with a cringe. "Sorry. Where was I?"

"You and Sara ran from the League," Diggle supplies, eyebrows drawing together.

Felicity nods, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth. "Right. We ran once we got out of Nanda Parbat. The plan was to get as far away as possible before they realized what we'd done, and then to leave the barest of trails to our location. It worked, for a while at least. We kept them focused on us, following our movements. Sara figured if they could track us, Ra's wouldn't resort to any… extraordinary measures."

"What changed?"

Felicity inhales deeply, eyes clouding over. "I'm not sure. One day, they were hot on our trail, the next… Just when they were closing in, they backed off. Sara was convinced they were going for our families, so we got back to the US as fast as we could."

"And you separated," Oliver surmises, accusation at the fringes of his voice.

She swallows thickly. "Sara- we thought it was best. We could cover more ground if she went to look in on Laurel while I went to check on my mother. When I got to my mother's… the place was trashed. I was too late. And then Sara…" she pauses, her eyes starting to water before she takes a deep, fortifying breath and pushes the emotion aside. "We planned to meet in Starling three days ago, but she never showed."

The gap between Digg's eyebrows has all but disappeared by this point. "And you think Ra's took them."

Felicity nods. "It's the only thing that makes sense. He wants a trade."

The words hit Oliver like a punch to the gut, his eyes flying to meet hers. He just got her back and she's already talking about trading herself away once again. Trading her life for her mother's and Sara's isn't like committing to a year-long debt. This is permanent. If she does this, she'll die.

"You can't," he blurts out before he can control himself. Try as he might to stay closed off, the thought of her walking calmly to her death isn't one he can entertain.

She holds his gaze for a solid thirty seconds, surprise at his impassioned outburst breaking through the walls she's still trying so desperately to prop up. Eventually, she tears her eyes from his and lowers them to the floor once more, ashamed. "I'm not."

The statement jolts him back to reality. Felicity is always the first one to walk into danger for the ones she loves. The whole reason they're in this position in the first place is because she refused to let him take on the debt himself. The Felicity he knew would never place her life above the lives of others.

It's a stark reminder that this is not his Felicity. His Felicity left him and, regardless of these brief glimpses of the woman beneath the surface, she isn't coming back. Truthfully, he isn't sure he even wants her to. She left with no more than an agonizing voicemail. She destroyed him in a way no other woman has managed to do, in a way he isn't sure he can recover from. He can't forget all of that just because she's popped back up and announced she has a price on her head.

"Wait, back up a second," Roy intervenes. "This Ra's al Ghul person kidnapped your mother and Sara and wants you to trade your life for theirs, and you aren't gonna do it?"

"When we left… Sara made me promise that, no matter what happened, I wouldn't turn myself over to Ra's," Felicity explains morosely, pushing off the table and starting to pace. "She said it would all be for nothing if I turned myself over. I called her, after I realized my mother was gone. I was ready to return to Nanda Parbat right then, but Sara... We had a plan. Ra's had me working on some stuff and Sara was convinced we could use it against him so I didn't have to turn myself over."

"But that was before Sara was taken as well," Digg points out.

"That's why I'm here," she admits, fingers twitching toward her collapsed staff nervously. "We planned to find you guys after we checked up on my mom and Laurel, to figure out the best course of action to take Ra's down, but with Sara gone… She'd kill me before Ra's has the chance if I turn myself over now, and I can't do this alone. I need your help." She stops, turns to face him. Her eyes are once again completely open, pleading. "Please."

"How are we supposed to help you, exactly?" Roy wonders, drawing her attention away from Oliver. "I mean, I'm sorry, but if two of its members can't even escape the League, what chance do we stand?"

"A better one than if I go it alone," Felicity responds softly, eyes falling to the ground once more.

His head is spinning, never managing to land on one thought for long before bouncing on to the next. A couple of hours ago, he was going through the motions, taking part in his daily routine, existing. Now, his entire world has been upended and thrust back into chaos.

"Hey, man. What time did you guys get in?" Digg's voice breaks into his stupor and Oliver's eyes snap up to his friend. He doesn't know. "Oliver?"

He tries, but can't quite get the words out. Once he says it aloud, it's real.

"What's going on?" Digg probes, stepping toward the computer desk. The man takes in Oliver's slumped form, the broken phone in the corner. "Where's Felicity?"

Oliver's eyes fall to the floor, staring but not seeing. Everything is a blur, Felicity's choked apology ringing in his ears.

"She's gone."

"Look, I'll give you guys some time to think it over… talk about it," Felicity says, shifting her weight.

The awkward tension returns at her acknowledgment that she has no place in their decision. Last year, she would have played a key part in deciding their next course of action; she would have come in with the information and they wouldn't have questioned it. Last year, things were vastly different.

But that doesn't change the fact that people are missing. Felicity's mother. Sara. He can't let personal injury stand in the way of helping people who need it.

"Felicity," he bites out before she can take more than a couple of steps to the exit. She swivels her head back to him, the smallest glimmer of hope in her eyes. "We don't need to think about it. Your mother and Sara need help. We'll help them."

Her eyes fall shut and her shoulders slump as though invisible strings holding them taut have been cut. "Thank you."

His eyes find Digg's and the other man nods to him in affirmation. They're on the same page with this, at least.

That settled, he turns to Roy and runs a hand through his hair. "If you don't want to be involved in this…"

Roy doesn't even let him finish. "I go where you go."

The statement is so simple, so matter-of-fact, that Oliver has to take a second to absorb the true meaning of the words. Somewhere in all of the growing pains they've experienced since Felicity left and Roy joined the team, the kid has grown to trust and respect him. He's willing to follow him into this storm even though he's expressed his doubt about their success against the League.

"If you want out-"

"I won't," Roy cuts him off resolutely, crossing his arms over his chest.

Oliver nods in acceptance at the young man before turning to snatch his street clothes off the back of Felicity's computer chair. He's never quite been able to stop referring to it as hers, even after Diggle took up her position behind the monitors. It still surprises him when the chair swivels to reveal his burly brother instead of his… Felicity. He wishes it would stop hitting him like a punch to the gut but it never does.

Clenching his jaw, he pushes all thoughts of the past year away and heads back to change out of his Arrow gear. Before he can get far, his eyes catch on Felicity where she stands halfway between the table she'd been leaning against and the staircase. She looks uncomfortable and out of place, two things he never thought he'd see in connection to her down here. No matter what was going on, the foundry was always the one place she appeared completely unguarded. Yet another thing that's changed.

"It's late. We'll start fresh tomorrow," he decides. "Get some sleep. All of you."

Her eyes flick up to meet his and he catches the repressed scoff in them. He understands the instinct to mock an order to sleep after you've been through hell. The simplicity of the command grates on the nerves, like going to sleep is so easy. After living nightmares every day, the last thing you want is to close your eyes and fall captive to them in your dreams as well. His own nightmares have been plaguing him worse than ever since she left. It's gotten to the point that closing his eyes is something he once again dreads rather than welcomes. Given her reaction, she feels the same way. Neither of them will be getting much rest tonight.

The realization jars him, even though it shouldn't, and he tears his eyes away from hers. She looks outwardly the same, but the little things like the look in her eyes and her instinctual reaction to the unexpected keep proving that the Felicity he knew, the Felicity he loves, is gone. He can't stand to keep looking at her when he can't really see her.

When he gets to the washroom in the back, he splashes some water on his face, trying to calm himself. The eyes staring back at him when he looks in the mirror are swirling, too conflicted to settle on one emotion for long. Taking a deep breath, he pushes his emotional reactions aside. She's thrown him for a loop, but it's time he reigns himself back in.

The feat is made easier when he emerges from the back to find only Diggle and Roy left in the foundry. His gut clenches despite his resolve to stay unattached.

"Where's Felicity?" He asks, trying to keep his tone neutral. His voice cracks on her name, though, earning him a longer look from Diggle than is strictly necessary.

"She headed out," Roy answers, pulling at the ties and zipper of his suit.

She's only been back in his life for a few hours and she's already left without a goodbye. Again.

"Hey, man. How are you taking all this?" Diggle asks, eyeing Oliver from across the table. The two men have been silent since Roy left, Diggle refusing to leave even though Oliver insisted he should.

"I'm fine," he bites out gruffly, scrubbing aggressively at a blood stain on the arm of his Arrow suit. Diggle doesn't reply, just studies him with a raised eyebrow and crossed arms until he cracks. Letting the suit fall to the table, Oliver sighs. "I'll be fine."

"You sure about that? You look like you've seen a ghost."

Oliver scoffs. "I have."

"Isn't that a bit… drastic? We didn't think she died when she left, Oliver."

"But for all we knew she could have!" He snaps, clenching his hands into fists. "When she didn't show back up after the year…"

He doesn't have to finish the sentence for his friend to know what he's getting at. They both thought it, even though they never spoke of it. He's sure Roy wondered what was going on when the year came and went and the two of them got increasingly on edge. With each passing day that Felicity failed to reappear, they lost more and more hope that she was ever going to return. Eventually, they settled into a routine, accepting that she likely never would.

And now she's here, and he has no idea what to do with that.

He stays at the foundry for three days straight, trying to convince himself that running searches for her isn't fruitless. She'll crop up; he and Diggle will track her down and stop her from making this huge mistake. They'll go somewhere Ra's can't find them, just the two of them. They'll escape before the League has a chance to tarnish her. They'll…

"You can't keep doin' this to yourself, man," Diggle interrupts, startling him. The very fact that Digg can get the drop on him speaks to how far gone he is. "You have to go home, get some sleep. Thea's probably worried about you."

Oliver nods without really agreeing. Anything to put a stop to this conversation he doesn't want to have. He won't admit it. He can't.

"Oliver, we've been looking for three days and the only thing we turned up was the video of them entering the airport. We need-" He stops himself from finishing the sentence but Oliver still flinches. They need Felicity. "We have to accept that she's gone, and she doesn't want to be found."

Eventually, Oliver makes it back to the mansion. It's nearly five in the morning, so he'll only be able to grab a couple of hours' sleep, but in the grand scheme of things that's all he'd be able to manage anyways, so it doesn't really matter. Of course, that's assuming he's even able to get his mind to shut down long enough to fall asleep. Hopefully his wind-down work-out was enough to exhaust him into dreamless peace.

"Ollie?" Thea's sleepy voice doesn't manage to startle him, but the fact that she even heard him come in does surprise him.

"Speedy! What are you doing awake?"

Thea cocks an eyebrow, managing to exude sass even half-asleep. "I could ask you the same question."

"I was… working late," he supplies, sure he isn't convincing in the least.

As expected, his sister rolls her eyes. "Sure you were. You know, when I said I hoped losing Felicity didn't turn you back into your old self, I didn't mean I hoped it would turn you into someone else entirely."

Oliver's fingers twitch, rubbing together in agitation. He is not up for this conversation right now. "Speedy…"

Thea holds up a hand to stop his warning. "No, I know, we've had this talk before. I just wish you weren't still so consumed by this."

"It's not that simple, Thea," he snaps, pinching the bridge of his nose. It only takes a couple of seconds to apologize, citing his exhaustion for his unusually short fuse. His words are defeated, shoulders slumping and drawing closer scrutiny from his sister.

"Ollie… did something happen?"

"Ollie!" Thea chirps, nearly skipping down the hall to meet him, flowered skirt swishing around her legs. "I thought I heard you! It's been awhile, big brother."

She says it suggestively, complete with a wink and a nudge, but Oliver can't muster enough emotion to even try to play along. He has no effort left to fake it for her sake.

Thea frowns at his lack of response. "Everything OK, Ollie? You look like shit."

That gets a small huff of the barest amusement. "Don't sugarcoat it, Speedy."

"I never do!" She admits breezily. "Seriously, though, what's going on? Where's Felicity?"

"Gone."

His sister stops in her tracks, hand flashing out to pull him to a stop as well. "What?"

Sighing heavily, he half-turns back to her. "She's gone, Thea."

Admitting it out loud hurts far more than he thought it would. Invisible knives are stabbing into his gut, destroying him bit by bit. She's gone, and for all he knows she's not coming back. After everything, she made this decision for both of them and dropped off the map.

"Where? Why?" Thea demands, her fingernails biting into his arm. He can barely feel the pain. "I don't understand, Ollie."

He manages to muster one more half-truth for her sake. "She has some… family stuff to take care of."

"Ok, so she's coming back, then."

Oliver swallows thickly. "I'm not so sure about that."

Her brows tug together. "What do you mean? None of this makes any sense."

Exhausted, Oliver finally surrenders. "I'm tired, Speedy. Can we talk about this some other time?"

He isn't sure if it's the look in his eyes or the slump of his shoulders, but Thea nods, releasing his arm and allowing him to retreat to his bedroom. Once he closes the door behind him, the first thing he does is light a fire. Eventually, he drifts off on the floor in front of it.

"Why would you ask that?" He asks, stalling.

His sister's eyes narrow as she crosses her arms. "You seem… off. Plus, you're evading the question. What is it?"

"Nothing, Speedy. I'm just tired."

"Well, you should be, considering you've been out all night." She sounds like their mother right then and Oliver nearly teases her about it, but her next words take the playfulness out of him as soon as it appears. "But that's not it. You're always out late at night, but you never come back looking or sounding like this. Something's gotten you shaken up."

Suddenly, Oliver is exhausted. He's tired of it all: of lying, of keeping everything bottled up. He just has to say the words, to let someone know his world has gone spinning into chaos once again.

"Felicity's back."

Thea blinks, her head snapping in obvious shock. "Back?"

He nods, shoving his hands in the pockets of his khakis.

"She just… showed up?"

"Yeah, at Verdant."

"She just… popped in? No warning?"

Another nod.

"What did she say? Did she explain why she's been gone so long?"

"Yes."

"And?" Thea pries.

"It's not… it's complicated."

"No, it's not," she scoffs. "She ditched you last year with no warning and no contact. You had no idea where she was or when she was coming back. It's not "complicated" when she shows back up. It's simple. Either her explanation was worth it or it wasn't."

Oliver flinches at his sister's harsh outlook. Part of him knows she's right, but at the same time, she doesn't have the full picture like he does. Felicity may have put him through hell this past year, but she's been lost in a hell of her own. It is complicated, no matter how simple the circumstances may seem.

"Ollie…" Thea pauses, her voice softening as she reaches out to squeeze his forearm. "You're my big brother, and I love you. I'll always support you. But Felicity… she destroyed you. I've never seen you like this over a woman. Hell, I haven't seen you like this since you came back from the island. I don't want to see you like this ever again. If getting involved with her is going to inevitably throw you right back into the spiral you're only now clawing your way out of, steer clear."

It takes him a second to digest what his sister just told him, but when he finally does, he can't help the defensive instinct. "I didn't say anything about that."

"No, but I know you, Ollie, and I know how happy she made you. You loved her. You still do. But is it worth the pain if she leaves again?"

"It's way too soon to be thinking about any of that," he deflects, her words hitting too close to home. "She just got back, and there's no telling where her head's at. I don't even know where my head is at."

His sister's smile is sympathetic when she finally relents. "Fine. Just… think about what I said, OK? Promise me you'll be careful?"

"Always, Speedy."

With that, Thea heads back to her room and he proceeds to his. When he closes the door behind him, the first thing he does is light a fire. In time, Oliver manages to drift into an uneasy sleep on the floor in front of it.

A/N: once again, thank you for your support and continued reviews! I've been terrible at replying to them so far, but I will try to make a better effort because I really do appreciate them!