A/N: Ugh, I am so sorry guys. I've been meaning to post this, but life has been NUTS lately. I got an actual adult job! So that's kept me very busy and cut into my writing time. I'm slowly developing a balance though, so hopefully I won't take as long next time.

Chapter 4

She scales the fire escape back to the roof as soon as she gets outside, mind already whirling. It hadn't gone according to plan, but the wheels are still in motion. They agreed to help her; so what if it had gone a little awry along the way? Making amends was always the first thing she intended to do when she returned, but now, with everything going on, it can't be her first priority. Maybe, after all this is through, after her mother and Sara are safely home, she can try to explain and earn back the trust she's lost.

Or maybe she should leave it alone. She isn't the same woman Oliver loved, and she's pretty sure he is now a different man. Is he seeing someone? Does he want to be? Sara once told Felicity that, even if the timing had been such that they could have attempted to reconcile when Sara revealed herself to be alive, she and Oliver wouldn't have worked. The two are shrouded in darkness, unable to pull themselves out of it, let alone each other. Now, Felicity is falling victim to the same blackness, slowly tumbling down into the shadowy depths, unable to grab hold of anything to climb back out. Does that mean she and Oliver no longer work? Will the people they are now mesh as well as the people they were? Perhaps she sacrificed any chance of them being together when she disappeared in the dawn without a trace.

Shaking her head, Felicity pulls herself the rest of the way onto the roof and pauses to get her head back in the game. She needs to focus on the problem she can do something to solve instead of wasting time trying (or perhaps it's wanting) to be the woman Oliver and Diggle remember. She has to embrace who she is now, because that person is the one who will save her mother and Sara. Decision made, she takes a running start and leaps across the gap between buildings, disappearing into the night with single-minded focus.

They board the plane in the harsh light of day, giving Felicity enough time to thoroughly second guess her decision. What if they could have found another way? What if leaving like this is premature? What if Ra's wouldn't have come for her loved ones? What if-

"Stop overthinking it," Sara instructs, eyes sliding in every direction all at once. She's assessing their surroundings yet still manages to pick up on Felicity's doubts, which, yes, is pretty damn impressive. Maybe the League will teach her how to do that…

The thought sobers her. "Overthinking what?"

Sara shoots her a look out of the corner of her eye. "What's done is done. It's too late to back out now."

Felicity heaves out a breath, hiking her duffel bag higher on her shoulder. They'd stopped at her apartment to grab some necessities, half of which Sara informed her were not actually necessary. In the end, she left with some jeans, sweats, jackets, underwear, and tank tops, along with a few toiletries such as toothpaste and deodorant. And Oliver's sweater. She blatantly refused to leave that behind.

"Ra's would have come for him, Thea, Diggle…" Sara trails off, stopping their trek through the bustling airport after dodging a family of four. Her blonde hair whips around with the momentum and Felicity stops short. "Your mother would have been the first one he went for. Ra's may operate under a code that spares innocents from harm, but there are ways around that. He may not have physically hurt her, but he wouldn't have left her alone. You're doing the right thing."

It takes her a moment to absorb what Sara's saying, but once she does, Felicity swallows thickly and nods. She's right. Of course she's right. This is the only option if she wants to protect the people she loves.

"Detective Lance," she calls out, stepping carefully into the nearly deserted precinct. It's so late, or perhaps early, that she would be surprised to find him here if she hadn't staked the place out the past couple of nights to get a feel for his routine. The lone occupant's head snaps up at the first indication of her presence, the man half-risen from his chair already. She's glad she divested herself of the wig and mask prior to calling out, unable to bear it if his eyes had lit in recognition of who he thought was his daughter.

"Miss Smoak," he exhales, dropping into the chair and leaning back. His fingers lace over his slightly pronounced stomach as he waits for her to explain herself. "Haven't seen you in a while."

She shifts, uncomfortable at the attention he's drawing to her absence. "I've been… away."

"With my daughter, it seems."

Felicity flinches as he gestures to her leather costume. "Yes."

The tense silence she's growing used to settles between them until Lance breaks it by leaning forward and propping his forearms on the desk. The movement brings his graying hair, thinner than the last time she saw him, into focus. "What's happened to her?"

Felicity blinks. "What do you-"

"Don't play games with me," he snaps, pushing himself to his feet. "I'm not stupid. You both disappear a little over a year ago, not a trace, and suddenly you pop up, wearin' her clothes… and you expect me to believe everythin's fine? Where is my daughter?"

So no skirting the issue, then. "I don't know."

Lance's face falls right along with Felicity's gut at the admission. She had one job, one thing to do for Sara in return for everything her friend has done for her, and she failed.

"Where are we even going?" She asks, hurrying to catch up with Sara. For having such short legs, the woman can move. She's grateful Sara at least made her ditch the heels she'd been wearing.

"To a private hangar."

"A private- The League has its own hangar?" The information shouldn't astonish her, but it does. She barely catches the amused tilt of Sara's lips when the other woman glances back at her. "So, what, we just get on Air to the Demon and take off? How does that even work? Aren't there, like, flight itineraries and passenger manifests that need to be turned in?"

Sara's lips grow into a full-on amused smirk now. "You're cute."

Nyssa is waiting for them at the gate, fingers knitted together. She looks almost… regal. At any rate, at least she ditched the League garb in favour of dark jeans, a tank top, and a leather jacket. "You are late."

Sara rolls her eyes, coming to a stop in front of the woman. "By three minutes."

"It does not matter. Late is late."

The two women stare each other down for a solid minute, Felicity holding her breath the entire time. She'd be lying if she said the tension isn't making her anxious. Nyssa is a formidable presence, but Sara is matching her bit for bit. Sometimes, it's too easy to forget that Sara is a trained assassin just like Nyssa. Soon, she will be, too. The thought terrifies her on multiple levels. She has no idea what she's really in store for, but she's about to immerse herself in the world her father was lost in. He drowned in the League for Isabel and, if he's to be believed, her. What if Nanda Parbat does the same to her, systematically stripping away everything that makes her… her? She isn't sure she can stand facing Oliver, Diggle, Thea, and her mother in a year if she's unrecognizable.

She's starting to understand her father a lot better already.

A movement draws her out of her internal spiral and her eyes flick up to see a smile breaking out on Nyssa's face. Alarmed, Felicity looks to Sara to see her also giving in to a smile. Apparently, this is some sort of private joke between them, and not an actual conflict.

"Hey," Sara says to her quietly once Nyssa disappears inside the plane. "I'm going to take care of you, Felicity. You'll be ok."

Sucking in air, Felicity nods. "Sara, tha-"

"Don't thank me," she cuts her off, anticipating Felicity's next words.

"Then I'll take care of you, too," she says instead, pausing before shaking her head. "I realize that doesn't mean much since I'm, you know, me… but I've got your back."

Sara smiles, reaching out to squeeze her hand. "Don't sell yourself short. You're strong, Felicity. You're a fighter, and you're going to survive this. Trust me."

"Detective Lance-"

"It's Captain now," he informs her, looking off to the side and scrubbing a hand over his jaw. "So you're tellin' me my daughter's missin'?"

Felicity's eyes flutter shut and she huffs out a slow breath. "Yes. She, um… we were supposed to meet in the city but she never showed. She didn't come to visit you at all?"

Lance takes a second to reply, lost in his own thoughts. She can't blame him. The revelation that the daughter he thought dead until almost two years ago is now missing isn't one she really wanted to deliver, but it had to be done. Finally, he recovers enough to shake his head, his eyes misting over. "N-no. I haven't heard from her since she left last year."

"Dete-" She takes a step toward him before stopping to correct herself. "Captain."

Lance's eyes find hers, lost and anguished, and Felicity recoils. Where she instinctually moved forward to comfort him a moment ago, she now stands awkwardly, fists clenching by her sides. She isn't really sure what to do. The woman she was a year ago would have closed the distance and offered Lance a hug, or squeezed his forearm, or done anything to connect him to the present when he's clearly lost in the past, but this Felicity can't do that. It's not even her place to try. She is the reason he's in this position to begin with. Sara wouldn't be missing if not for her. This is her fault.

Felicity's eyes squeeze shut against the guilt assaulting her. By the time she looks back up, Lance is staring into the distance, still just as lost. She tries once more to reach out to him, but falters halfway through the gesture. Instead, she settles on, "I'll find her, Captain."

He says nothing until she's almost out the door, his voice making her freeze even though she doesn't turn. "Alone?"

The concern in his voice nearly breaks her. Even after everything she just dumped on him, he's still worried for her.

"I won't be alone." Even though the words come out of her mouth, she doesn't feel the truth of them. She may have help from Oliver, Diggle, and Roy, but that doesn't mean she isn't alone. She's never felt more alone than she does right now.

Nanda Parbat is… different than she expected. The way Sara talked about it, she pictured bleak, barely lit hallways and cold, stone dungeons. Instead, the candlelight gives off a warm glow that seems almost… intimate. There's red everywhere, which should be morbid, but it only adds to the effect. It's oddly beautiful.

"Ra's al Ghul will see you now," Nyssa tells her, claiming her attention from where she's gaping at her surroundings.

Felicity blinks, looks to Sara.

"You will go in alone."

She tries not to panic at that statement, but she must fail miserably because Sara reaches out and clasps her hand firmly. "You'll be fine."

She takes a deep breath, squares her shoulders, and returns the pressure to Sara's hand to signify that she's ready. Before she can talk herself out of it, she strides purposefully into the chamber to meet her fate.

"Miss Smoak. I am glad you have decided to join us."

"Hey, thanks for letting me use your shower," Felicity calls out as she exits the bathroom. She has a limited supply of clothes, but the fresh jeans and dark purple tank top help her feel more grounded in the present.

"No problem. Any friend of Sara's..." comes the reply. Felicity spends half a minute towelling her hair off before Sin comes to lean on the doorframe. "Sorry the water's not great. The Glades suck."

Felicity shrugs, moving to fish her brush out of her bag and dropping the towel on top. "It's no big. I've spent the last year taking lukewarm baths in candlelight. A shower is… great."

Sin studies her for a minute, brows furrowing, before finally asking, "Where were you and Sara? I mean, she's told me bits and pieces of her life outside Starling, but she never goes into detail."

Felicity tries to smile but it comes out more of a grimace. "There's a reason for that."

The two fall silent, Felicity dragging a brush through her hair and sticking contacts in without looking in the mirror while Sin busies herself opening a drawer and shuffling some clothes around. Finally, Sin pauses and looks back up at Felicity, the younger girl's eyes betraying her anxiety. "Sara's… she's the only family I've got. You'll find her, right?"

She hasn't given Sin the details, just a vague outline that Sara is missing. Even telling her that much isn't what Felicity intended when she first returned, but the girl happened upon her in the clock tower her first night in town and mistook her for Sara. She had to say something. Plus, Sin is one of a few people Sara would risk exposing her presence to, a fact which couldn't be ignored in the search for the other blonde. Unsurprisingly, Sin is eager to help, wanting to do anything she can. In order to keep her out of it, Felicity bargained for the use of the girl as her eyes and ears in the Glades on the off chance something is mentioned regarding Sara. Hopefully, it keeps Sin out of the line of fire yet satisfies her need to feel like she's doing something to help.

Felicity nods, stopping short of reaching out once more.

Sin gives her a forced smile, trying to lighten the mood. "No leather get-up today?"

Grasping the branch the younger woman is extending, Felicity pastes a grin on her own face. "Afraid not. I'm meeting with some... associates to figure out our next move. I don't think that warrants wearing a mask."

"So you're meeting with Roy and the Arrow," Sin guesses, nodding along. "Good."

It surprises Felicity that Sin seems to know a lot more about Roy's night life than she suspects Thea does. Then again, Oliver has a say in what Roy tells Thea, but he has no place to force Roy to keep quiet around Sin. The kid probably needs someone outside it all to talk to.

"I should get going," she tells Sin, zipping the bag and slipping it over her shoulder. She snatches Sara's leather jacket from its place on the bed and folds it over one arm; it's too warm for a jacket right now. "Thanks again, Sin."

"Anytime," the younger woman responds, shoving her hands in the pockets of her skinny jeans and looking at the floor almost bashfully. "You know, if you want... You could crash on my couch. It's gotta be better than the clock tower."

This time, the smile on Felicity's face is genuine but filled with melancholy. "I wish I could take you up on that, but I would never put you in that kind of danger. The people coming after me... I would never forgive myself if something happened to you because of my choices."

Sin chuckles without amusement. "That's what Sara used to say."

By the time she gets to the foundry's entrance, she's forgotten about the lock. She tugs on the door in vain before finally giving up and pulling a burner phone from her pocket. Her thumb hovers over the buttons for a brief moment, trying to decide who to call to let her in. She has the tech to hack the keypad, but there's a reason she's being kept out, and she'd rather not stir things up by forcing her way past Oliver's guard. Eventually deciding on Diggle, she keys his number into the phone from memory and hits send.

Two minutes later, the door clicks open to reveal him dressed, as always, in a leather jacket and jeans. At least that hasn't changed. Neither has his proclivity for few words, as his only invitation inside is a jerk of the head and a step back. Taking the hint, she follows him down the stairs to see Roy and Oliver sparring on the mats. Where she would have stopped and taken the sight in before, now she walks right past it, not distracted by the sounds of grunting and whacking as she once was. Sparring was a regular occurrence in all areas of Nanda Parbat, and she learned quickly to ignore it if she meant to get any real work done.

She bristles at his words. "You speak as though I had a choice in coming here."

Ra's smiles, or as close to it as she imagines he ever comes. It's too malicious to be considered a true smile, and it raises goosebumps along her arms. The effect is only compounded by his voice when he replies, "Oh, yes, you did. You could have chosen death, like your father. Instead..." He pauses, gestures around the room with spread fingers, palms raised to the ceiling. "You are here."

Felicity swallows, or maybe it's gulps. She wishes Sara were here, but that's not going to happen. She really wishes Oliver were here, but that's definitely not going to happen, so she'd better just suck it up. Time to pretend this man (is he a man?) isn't intimidating her in the least.

"So, now that I am... What next? Why did you want me here?"

"I did not simply want you here, Ms. Smoak. I require your skills."

"For what?" She snaps, irritated at the pains he went through to make the distinction. It's as though he believes that makes it alright to implicitly threaten her loved ones.

"In time, you will know, Ms. Smoak," he replies cryptically, his eyes focused on where his fingers run down the polished, wooden armrest of his... throne? "First, you must train."

She speaks out on impulse, trusting her instinct to make this particular clarification. "And my training... that's included in the debt, correct?"

His fingers still and he looks up at her, all laser focus and intensity. "I do not understand your meaning."

"The debt starts now, right?" She asks, nerves threatening to break through. "Not once I'm trained to your standards."

Ra's lifts a single eyebrow. The expression adds another layer of menace to the man she didn't think was possible, the opposite effect of when Oliver does it. "That is not our usual practice."

"This is not your usual circumstance," Felicity retorts, finding her backbone once more.

"How so?"

"You need me for my skillset. You said it yourself. My combat skills have no impact on my abilities with a computer. I can do what you need me to starting right now, so I see no reason to delay the beginning of the debt. Besides, I already possess intermediate hand-to-hand skills."

She stops herself before she can say too much. Her mouth could get her into a lot of trouble with these people, if it hasn't already. By the way Ra's is staring her down, unblinking, she fears she might have overstepped a bit, but she had to try. The thought of being gone longer than a year does not sit well with her.

Finally, just when she's starting to squirm uncomfortably under his scrutiny, Ra's laughs. Booming, raucous, full-belly laughter. Felicity tries to control her reaction, but fails as she stumbles back half a step in shock. Ra's al Ghul is... laughing at her?

When he manages to calm himself, amusement lingers around the corners of his mouth and crinkles his eyes, both terrifying and strangely innocent.

"Very well. Your debt begins right this moment," he acquiesces before all traces of amusement vanish from his features. He leans forward, turning Felicity's blood cold. "However… The very fact that you believe yourself to possess intermediate ability in combat proves how naive you are, Ms. Smoak. You will be cured of that before you leave here. I promise."

Striding purposefully to her computer chair, she ignores John's gaze cautiously tracking her across the basement. The presence of Roy's suit across from Oliver's still surprises her, as do the new processors attached to her babies. She hadn't noticed them last night.

"You guys upgraded?" She asks Diggle. Roy and Oliver didn't break a stride when they entered and don't seem to be pausing now, either.

He nods, crossing his arms. "Lyla scored them from ARGUS."

Felicity nods appreciatively, eyes raking over the connections out of habit. Everything seems in order. "Nice."

The approval eases a bit of the tension lingering between them, as though Diggle was worried she might be angry they changed her system. Of course, there's still the huge elephant in the room that neither of them want to address.

She opens her mouth to say... something, but snaps it closed when a thought occurs to her. Tilting her head, she studies her friend. "Who's running it?"

He doesn't even flinch. "I am."

That shocks her. "What? Why?"

"I'm scaling things back. Taking fewer risks."

That doesn't sound like the John Diggle she knows. Or is it knew?

"Yeah, fatherhood turned him into a softy," Roy chimes in through labored breath. She glances over to see him squirting water alternately into his mouth and all over his face when his words fully register.

"Wait, what?" She demands, snapping back to Diggle. "You're... Lyla...?"

She isn't sure if he tries to control it, but a slow smile spreads across Diggle's face as he nods. "Yeah, Lyla and I have a baby."

Felicity blinks, more than a little overwhelmed. Diggle has a baby. Diggle is a father. One of her best friends had a child and she missed it. The entire thing happened while she was gone. If she hadn't come back, she wouldn't have known at all.

"I..." She stumbles around something to say. "Wow. That's... unexpected."

Diggle snorts. "For you and me both. Less so, now that I've had eleven months to get accustomed to the idea, though."

It's a joke. An honest attempt to lighten the mood when it should have automatically darkened. In this moment, as her lips stretch into a genuine smile, she loves John Diggle more than words.

"Congratulations, John."

If any of them notice that she doesn't reach out to hug him, no one says anything.

A/N: Hopefully worth the wait?