Physical Affection
Touko had learned a lot about N since they first began dating. His likes, dislikes, taste in music, ability to perform complex math problems in his head in seconds (he immediately became the one to figure out tips after first displaying this talent on their first date to a nice restaurant). But one trait stood out above all the rest.
They hugged each other at every meeting and separation and plenty of times in between. They could more often be found holding hands than not. They had kissed, several times. But never once was N the one to initiate the contact.
Touko was the one to reach for his hand. She stood on tiptoes to pull him down and kiss his pale pink lips. She was the person to run up to him and the first to wrap arms around the other. She played with his hair and leaned on him in café booths and at musicals or movies.
Never did N grab her hand or lean over to kiss her, nor did he go out of his way to touch her unless necessary.
That wasn't to say that N didn't return her affections. Quite the contrary.
He melted into her hugs, holding her tight against his body. He gently and hesitantly kissed back, lack of experience and innocence adorably obvious in his awkward but tender attempts at mimicking her more aggressive kissing style.
When her small hand slipped into his large palm and she threaded their fingers together, he gave her hand a soft but firm squeeze in recognition. When she played with long strands of his hair or ran his fingers across the locks on the top of his head, he leaned into her touch and allowed her to play with it as she wished with only a smile on his face. When she leaned on him, an arm snaked behind her back and pulled her slightly closer.
If it had been any other boy, Touko might have been concerned with the lack of initiation on his part. She might have taken it as a sign he wasn't as interested in her as she was in him, or that she was being too needy.
But this was N, a boy whose experience with human affection had probably amounted only to occasional hugs from the women who had kept him company all those years in that castle. It didn't surprise her that he wouldn't feel comfortable being the one to start any form of contact.
And what he lacked in physical contact, he made up for with smiles, and laughs, and rushed and half-mumbled declarations of love that had him blushing in his cheeks and across the bridge of his nose. He lavished praise that was completely genuine, and listened to her every word, even if she was just thinking aloud about topics that didn't hold significance even for her.
He would never make the first move, but he always treated her with loving care, and that was good enough for Touko.