When it all falls apart
Chapter Seven
It takes Derek about a week to gather enough courage to actually approach Stiles about the Scott issue.
It's not that he thinks Stiles is going to hit him or something, but, being completely honest with himself, the thing is that he's never been close to Stiles, ever – sure, they saved each other's lives for a while, but that's the extension of their interactions up until the day the man became Laura's teacher.
How can you just barge the life of someone you have no intimacy with and ask them to give an old friend a chance to explain why their friendship is dead and buried? He's not that good at talking – sure, he's better than he was at it ten years ago, but still.
He promised his Beta he'd do it, though, and he has to keep his promise, not only because he's trying to be a good Alpha, but also because Scott is a good man who has suffered too much, and lost too much for him to not even try.
Maybe what he needs is a true way to move on – even if he and Stiles end up not being friends again, this time Stiles will have all the facts before he decides to not have Scott in his life instead of just thinking his then best friend cast him out just because.
It would do both of them some good, all things considered.
He wakes Laura up and gets her ready for the day, taking in deep, calming breaths – by the end of today, he'll approach Stiles about it.
X
"You do not need a house with six bedrooms, Lydia" Stiles sighs when he says it, because they're having this discussion for the past fifteen minutes, and he has the feeling Jackson will start growling at any time now, "Because it's impractical. You have already said you want just the one kid. You and Jackson will have one room, and one room for the kid you'll eventually have, and one for guests, and, really, why do you need any more than that?"
This time, Lydia almost growls at him, and Stiles stops listening, like he learned to do all those years ago, when he still tried to rationalize Lydia out of some idea by arguing with her on the spot. It's just not done.
He lets her speak for a while longer, messing with his kitchen, trying to find something edible, but, truth be told, he has nothing in the house. He will have to order pizza again, and soon enough he will be the one with the strict diet if he doesn't start exercising soon with the way he's been eating.
Lydia, apparently, has given up on arguing with Stiles and has turned her ire on to Jackson – who, really, should have been her target all along, seeing as he is the one who'll live with her, not Stiles – and Stiles says his goodbye and hangs up before things get ugly, as they tend to do between the two of them.
God, he even misses their fights.
He orders the pizza, takes a quick shower as he waits, and settles on the couch, trying to find something to watch on TV – his lesson plans for the week are done, and there's no work to be done tonight, which is amazing because he's dead tired and it's only Monday. He's on his way to his fourth piece of pizza when his doorbell rings and he goes to get it, thinking it's probably his dad – the Sheriff has taken to showing up in the early evening when he can. They chat, watch some TV, talk, all in all it's pretty nice.
He totally isn't expecting Derek Hale at his doorstep.
Again.
"Uhm, hi" he greets awkwardly, staring at the man who looks as if he doesn't want to be here either – which doesn't even make sense, seeing as he came to Stiles's place.
"I was hoping I could talk to you" Derek gets out in a rush, as if he has rehearsed the sentence, "It's nothing bad, but I promised I would talk to you, so I came to… talk. To you."
The man actually looks embarrassed at the halting way he's speaking, and Stiles fights a small smile.
"Sure. Come in" he invites, closing the door behind Derek when he gets in, "I was just…" he trails off, gesturing to the pizza box and the TV and Derek nods at him.
"Sorry I caught you at a bad time."
"Not bad. It's okay. Is everything okay with Laura?" he's actually a bit concerned as he sits down and Derek takes it as a cue, sitting across from him on the couch.
"No, she's great. Nothing wrong with Laura. I…" the man takes in a deep breath before going on, "Look, I know I was not very good at being an Alpha when you left the pack. I made mistake after mistake, and it was hard, but I learned some things along the way, and Scott is my second in command. He's like a brother to me, and all I want is to make my pack happy – usually, that is an easy task, but Scott asked me… Actually, I offered to come and talk to you about him."
"I'm going to stop you right there, because first Melissa, and then my dad and now you. Why doesn't Scott come and talk if he wants to?"
"Because chances are that you are going to react badly to him, and… I didn't know anyone else had already talked to you about it. It's just… he wants to talk to you, Stiles, he was hurt when you stopped being friends."
"Oh, yeah, because I was just great when that happened. Listening that I was useless, that I was no good for the pack I risked my life for daily, truly, one of the high points of my High School years" he shoots back angrily.
Derek's eyes flash briefly, but Stiles doesn't back down, he waits.
"It did get better since then, didn't it? You didn't have to risk your life. Your dad was safe. Lydia was safe, Jackson was safe. Danny was safe. Do you really think Beacon Hills just… got better all of a sudden? Do you really think nothing else ever happened here?"
"Well, if it did, it was your pack's problem, wasn't it?"
Derek sighs and runs a hand on his face, clearly looking like someone who really doesn't want to be having this conversation at all.
"No, Stiles, it wasn't. I lost count of how many times we had to stop things from going after Jackson because of what he had done back then, what he was before he turned right. How many things wanted to use Lydia for her ability, her immunity. How many things came after you because you were with them, or because they knew you were the Sheriff's kid. Hell, how many times Scott pulled an all-nighter to keep an eye on your dad, so he wouldn't get caught up in our fight when things got bad. Things didn't magically get better, Stiles. It took time and effort, and it cost us all a lot – but not as much as it cost Scott. I lost everything already, from that time to now it only ever got better, because I have my pack and I have Laura, and I never thought I would have any of this, but Scott lost everything but his mother. He did what he did because he wanted to keep you safe."
Stiles shakes his head then, not knowing what to think.
"So, what? He hurt me to keep me safe? Is that it? And I'm supposed to accept that?"
"He never thought you would accept that. He thought he would keep you away until the whole mess with the Alphas was definitely over, maybe a week or two, but, well, you moved on and he lost you. Sure, he and Boyd and Isaac are friends, but they are not you. They weren't there with Scott before he became a werewolf, they weren't there when his dad left" he makes a pause then, sighing deeply and looking away, "When he told us he wanted to keep you away, we started to keep an eye on you, the four of you, always. We protected you throughout High School, and then I actually though Scott would have a shot at being happy, because, well, he didn't have to see you being happier with Lydia and Jackson and Mahealani and then, a few years after that, Allison left and I swear to God I thought Scott wouldn't pull through. If it wasn't for his mother he wouldn't have. He lost everything but her, Stiles. I'm not asking you to be his best friend again, I'm not asking you to invite him into your life and pretend the last ten years never happened, I'm not even asking you not to be hurt – I'm just asking that you give him a chance to talk to you. To let him explain himself, at least."
Stiles is already shaking his head at that, and Derek looks exasperated.
"You're not even going to let him tell you why he did it?"
"It's not that simple."
"Of course it is! Let him explain himself to you, Stiles."
"That's not it, okay? You don't know what it was like back then, what I was losing. Do you really think I didn't consider calling Scott? Or that I didn't miss him? Or that I somehow wondered if he hadn't done any of that just to get me out of the line of fire? Of course I did, Derek, I'm not stupid! But things aren't that simple, okay?"
"Then explain it to me."
"I don't have to explain myself to you" he tells the Alpha very calmly, "We weren't even friends back then. I don't even feel that I have to explain myself to Scott who was actually my best friend, why would I have to tell you anything?"
"Because if you actually make sense, I promise you, I swear to you, I won't let Scott bother you. Just give me a reason, a good, tangible reason for it."
"And if I tell you this, you'll leave me alone?" he asks, his tone disbelieving.
Derek nods at him, his face serious.
"I swear to you."
Stiles takes a deep breath, thinking about a way to put into words how all those things felt so long ago, but, again, his doorbell rings, and he doesn't even have to the time to get up and answer it when his dad barges in with the key Stiles left with him, for emergencies.
The Sheriff looks at him and Derek, and then takes a look at the half eaten pizza in front of them and arches an eyebrow.
"Am I interrupting your dinner?" his voice teasing and Stiles shakes his head fast, as Derek gets to his feet.
"No, sir. Actually, I interrupted his dinner about, well, just, school things. I'm going to go now."
He nods at Stiles and leaves so fast Stiles is surprised there isn't a trail of smoke behind him, like in the cartoons.
However, Derek's retreat leaves Stiles with a smirking Sheriff.
"You won't talk to Scott but you'll talk to Hale?"
"He came by to talk about Scott. Apparently, he has a whole lot of people ready to come to his defense."
His father raises his hands in a surrender gesture.
"Not saying anything. Especially not saying anything if you let me have some of that pizza, seeing as I have a night shift."
"Again?"
The Sheriff sighs, sitting down and picking up a piece.
"Vanessa is at the house today, she just had to take the rest of her stuff, and I think she doesn't want me around, but she wouldn't just tell me to leave, so…"
"So you're avoiding the problem until it goes away."
The Sheriff doesn't answer and Stiles smirks, patting his dad on the back.
"I taught you well" he says, a proud tone in his voice, which gets him a push from his dad.
He'll think about whatever Derek told him later.
X
In true Stiles fashion, he tries to ignore the whole Scott thing for a while, hoping it'll go away, but, of course, he's not that lucky, because he's back in Beacon Hills, and Beacon Hills is not exactly the luckiest place for him in the world.
Lydia and Jackson come to town on Wednesday, finally deciding on a house – a four bedroom place, in the richest neighborhood, just far enough from both of their parents' place that they won't go crazy, but close enough that they are still in walking distance.
As Stiles lives literally ten minutes from his dad, he's not pointing any fingers.
He goes with them to take a final inspection of the place – and mostly field Lydia's dad's questions about the whole thing, seeing as the man hates Jackson and adores Stiles, something he takes great pleasure out of, and he has to admit it'll look pretty amazing once it's decorated.
The parents eventually leave, and the three of them are left alone, sitting in a big empty living room, with a large window looking out on the small garden on front of the house.
"So, how are things here?" Jackson asks, sitting cross-legged on the floor, one of his hands in Lydia's hair, the other supporting his weight as he leans back. Lydia has her head on Jackson's lap, and is lying with her eyes closed, but Stiles knows she's listening.
"Weird."
"How weird?" she finally asks, cracking one eye open.
"Well, I told you about the freak out Derek had about Laura's sleepover. After that, well…"
"What, Stiles? Spill it out."
"Melissa McCall came to see me, asking me to talk to Scott."
"Argh, so typical, you move back and they think you have to go back to the same friends you had back then" Lydia huffs.
"Well, my dad kind of told me to give him a chance too."
"Your dad doesn't know the whole story. Your dad doesn't even know about werewolves, Stiles" Jackson points out, and Stiles sighs.
"Derek came to see me too. He made it sound so much… bigger than it is. I mean, come on, it's been so long, why would Scott even want to talk to me in the first place? It's been, what, ten years? How can this be such a big issue for him?"
"It's an issue for you too, clearly" Lydia points out, and Stiles sighs.
"Kind of, but not in the same way. I don't like it that they're trying to get me back or whatever it is. I don't like being used; I don't like being second place for someone else. I don't want to feel like I used to feel when I was still in their pack. Or when I thought I was in their pack. I'm pissed that they are making such a big deal out of this for him, as if I'm the bad guy, as if I'm breaking his heart or something."
The couple is silent for a few seconds, and Stiles rolls his eyes.
"Oh, please. Not you too."
"Look, God knows I don't like it. For years I resented them for everything that happened to us, but, look at it this way, okay?" Lydia starts, sitting up. Jackson is frowning, knowing he's not going to like this, "We moved on, Stiles. We're back because we want to be. We had the option of going, and we had each other through it all. We had fun at college, we despaired at our life choices at one point or another, we freaked out when nothing seemed to work, we got homesick, we missed our parents, we partied, we got sick, we crammed and we suffered and it was amazing, and in the end, here was still the place we wanted to live, to really grow our families in. But we left. We're here by choice, and in the end, we lost very little."
Stiles stares at her for second and Jackson is the one to put a hand on his shoulder, pulling him closer, comforting him.
"Little?" he asks, his voice a bit rough, his eyes itching.
"By our choices? Little. We lost a whole world with Danny, and you know better than anyone else how much we all miss him, but, Stiles, it was an accident. Not a werewolf, not a hunter, not him leaving us because he wanted to. Of course we lost, but we lost Danny to fate. Scott lost you because he was stupid, and he lost Allison because she wanted to go. He hasn't changed, he hasn't moved on, he's still here, trapped, even working at the same place, even if now he's a partner instead of an assistant, but, well, maybe you are all hope he has for moving on. Maybe he doesn't even need you to be his friend again, but he needs some closure, any kind of closure – even if it's just finding out you two will never be friends again."
"I can't believe you're actually encouraging him to talk to that potato head" Jackson tells his fiancée angrily.
"I can't believe you're a Lawyer and is actually calling someone a potato head."
"I'm lowering the IQ of the conversation so Stiles will get used to his new best friend's vocabulary."
"Oh my God, Jackson, shut up. Even if I do end up agreeing to talk to Scott, it doesn't mean we'll be friends again. And even if we do eventually start talking again, he's not going to be my best friend" Stiles turns to Jackson, staring right into his eyes, "It's been ten years, Jackson. You're my best friend, you've been it since the day you called me to let me know Derek had looked for you to get you back in his pack, and you told me you had friends, and included me in it. He can't replace you."
Jackson fights a smile and huffs.
"Of course he can't replace me. As if McCall of all people could ever replace me in anything."
Stiles pushes Jackson to the floor with that, and Lydia gets up, muttering about stupid men who refuse to grow up.
Stiles feels better than he has in a long, long time.
He missed this.
X
Thursday afternoon, Derek actually apologizes for bothering him with the Scott thing when he picks Laura up at school, and Stiles just smiles and tells him it's fine.
He also tells Derek he's thinking about it.
The smile Derek gives him makes his heart jump in his chest in a way it hasn't since… well, in a long time. He definitely is ignoring that for the moment, seeing as he's doing the grown-up thing and dealing with the Scott thing.
The fact is that it has been ten years. That is a long time to hold a grudge for a High School fight, and he certainly doesn't intend to be dragged around in crazy, potentially life imperiling situations. He's an adult, he has a house – he teaches kids, for crying out loud.
Talking to Scott is not going to change anything, unless he wants anything to change.
Ten years. Ten years and it still kind of hurts every time he thinks about Scott dismissing him like that, and it still hurts when he remembers the way it felt to know he was being pushed aside for Allison and Isaac.
Maybe he too needs some closure to move on.
By Friday evening he has made up his mind. He calls his dad, who calls Melissa, and makes both of them promise they won't say anything, gets Scott's number and sits by himself on his living-room, thinking about the right way to do this.
I'm texting Scott he sends Lydia and Jackson.
Good luck it's Lydia's response.
Got your English to Dummy dictionary on you? It's Jackson's.
He smiles at his phone and then takes a deep breath.
Want to come over for breakfast tomorrow? 9 is fine.
He hits send and puts his phone in the bedroom, not wanting to keep watching it, like he knows he'll do if it's near him.
Que sera sera, right?
X
Work at the clinic is always a bit hectic, because Scott doesn't possess the ability of not caring about stuff. He gets emotionally involved, and then if something happens to the animals they are taking care of, he gets upset and nervous and has a breakdown when he can't get them back to their little feet – it's all very funny for other people, but to Scott it is extremely upsetting.
On Friday, he's actually feeling pretty good about himself – he and Deaton saved a Siberian Husky that afternoon, and no other major cases showed up, so they are mostly doing some paperwork, which is supposed to be evenly split, but he always gets the feeling that Deaton somehow slips him more than he should get. He doesn't really complain though, being the younger partner and all.
Plus, Deaton has saved his ass so many times he can deal with a little extra paperwork for the man.
His phone beeps suddenly, and he frowns, not expecting anything. He talked to Derek that afternoon, his mom and him are having dinner in a couple of hours, Isaac has left just a few minutes earlier, and Boyd is, as always, buried in work.
It's a bit sad, but there really isn't anyone else who'd text him.
Want to come over for breakfast tomorrow? 9 is fine.
He stares at his phone, checks the message again, and his heart is beating so fast he starts to wonder if it's possible for a werewolf to have a heart attack.
Slowly, a small smile starts spreading on his lips, and he literally pumps a fist in the air, leaving his small office.
"Allan, can you cover for me tomorrow morning? I know it's my weekend, but—"
"Stiles finally agreed to talk to you" Deaton completes with a small smile, and Scott nods, feeling really happy.
The man smile at him and nods.
"You can work the next two weekends, no problem. Good luck."
Scott nods his thanks, and gets his things to leave, too excited to just sit there and write anymore.
Now all he has to do is convince Stiles they can be friends again.
Should be easy, right?