Kai.
...
Come on, talk to me.
Like that even matters to you.
It doesn't but that doesn't mean that I can't at least try to comfort you.
This sucks.
What sucks?
Feeling like... 'this'. I need to go to the counsellor.
But your not going to.
I know. But it helps thinking about it.
Look in the mirror and what do you see?
I see me.
Yep. Sad little you who's so scared of the world and what he's becoming.
I'm not becoming anything.
What, you think this is just some teenage hormones acting up?
Yes.
Oh please, you have a voice inside your head.
An annoying voice.
And here I thought I'd try to help.
All you do is make me hurt myself.
I haven't done that.
Mentally. You make me hurt myself mentally.
At least people on the outside won't see it.
But that just makes it worse.
Do you want them to see it.
Yes... well, no but sometimes it's hard.
How can it be hard, you've gone through most of your life faking a smile and now you wanna say it's hard.
Before, it was different. I didn't have a voice that drags me down inside my head. I didn't have as much stress from projects and tests-
Haha, that rhymes.
Forget it.
Your showers running a bit long don't you think.
Who cares.
You still need to fix your face so it doesn't look like you were crying.
Why can't I let them see?
Because, if you do then they'll all know. 'that's stupid' 'what's wrong with you? ' 'you know you can tell me anything.'
It's better than talking to a made up voice.
Is it?
Argh. My eyes are red, how am I gonna hide that?
Wash your face with cold water and if they ask, which I doubt they will, then say you got soap in your eyes.
Both of them.
Yep, you're pretty terrible in washing yourself.
Ok, now what.
Your face looks horrible. Smile.
...
No, it looks fake. Try again, smile with your eyes.
...
That's better. Now try speaking.
"Hey, how you doin'"
No. Your voice cracked, try it again and act like your happy.
"Hey, how you doin'"
It's better.
Okay, now what?
When you walk out then walk with your head down. But not too low or they'll suspect something but low enough that you can hide your face.
Okay. I'll try.
Wait, you didn't tell me a story yet.
Oh, umm, which one.
Remember the one that you read ages ago, the one with the boy.
Yeah...
That one.
Ok.
But say it out loud.
"Oh, little Suicide boy.
Suicide boy, did they even know your name?
Suicide boy, they act like you put a bullet through your head for fame.
Suicide boy, the ones who you thought never noticed you are now wearing all black.
Suicide boy, you've done something you can't take back.
Suicide boy, the doctors did all they could.
Suicide boy, your room is being boarded off with wood.
Suicide boy, I wish I could have saved you.
Suicide boy, could I even if I'd wanted to?
Suicide boy, your name is all over the news.
Suicide boy, you're now the broken boy with a permanent blues.
Suicide boy, you're floating through my dreams.
Suicide boy, no one could hear your screams.
Suicide boy, everyone is starting to move on.
Suicide boy, I'll never be the same now that you're gone.
Suicide boy, you'll never get to grow old.
Suicide boy, you could never fit their mould.
Suicide boy, they're saying you were a lost cause from a start.
Suicide boy, how could a broken home ever heal a broken heart?
Suicide boy, your ending is bittersweet and you're just a statistic now.
Suicide boy, the curtains are closing and you're not here to take a bow."
You know you can always cut your leg's instead...
Go to sleep!