Chapter Twenty-Eight

I kicked off my shoes when I got back upstairs. Ready to do some serious thinking. I was exhausted. Between being off caffeine and pulling all nighters with Ranger, I was going to need a nap just to keep going. Especially given that I was most likely in for another long and satisfying night. Laying out my clothes was probably a good idea. Just in case I overslept. I went into Ranger's closet to get my laundry basket.

It was empty.

Oh boy.

I looked around Ranger's giant walk-in closet. It was usually a cascade of black. Black t-shirts and linen dress shirts and Armani suits and black on black striped ties over hanging black cargo pants and slacks. All perfectly organized and lined up by purpose, and all very very black. Now there were flashes of color, too. Little hints of red and white blouses peeking between the linen dress shirts. Jewel bright sleeves of girly t-shirts and blue jeans mixed in with the Rangeman uniforms. Even my red dress with the swirly skirt was hanging with the Armani.

Omigod. I really was living with Ranger.

I found my black pencil skirt hanging with Ranger's slacks and selected a white silk blouse to go with it. Trying very hard not to think about how I felt. If it was as terrifying as it should be, I might freak out. And what if it wasn't? What if I felt differently when the shock wore off? What if I felt that warm fuzziness in my chest that I do about Morelli? That would be like asking for a broken heart.

I blew out a sigh and set the clothes aside with a pair of black pumps. Then I climbed into Ranger's bed. Snuggled down into his soft, Bulgari scented sheets. It's too bad Ranger never wanted to get married. I could totally get used to this.

When I was finally dragged awake with the knowledge that I wasn't alone, there was no moment of panic. Just a low burning anticipation. Ranger slid under the covers and leaned over me, gently kissing every inch of my exposed skin in an effort to wake me up. His hands searching under what little clothes I was still wearing. I felt him grin against my throat when I responded. Yep. I could definitely get used to this.

Ranger left me on his bed when he went to get dressed. Took me a minute. I was more quivering mush than woman. I was surprised to see Ranger in a nice dress shirt and slacks when he came out of the closet again, a sports coat in one hand. I didn't think it was just because we were having dinner with my parents. Ranger didn't care very much about the impression he gave off. The first time he came to dinner, he was dressed like a street thug. Wearing enough gold chains and swagger to not just secure bail for murder one, but to look like that might be a necessity. Since then, he's mostly gone with the body guard look. "Does this mean you're coming to the viewing with us?"

"It's not exactly my idea of a good time, but I figured it was smart to leave the option open."

"So it's not to impress my mother?"

I heard him chuckle. He entered my airspace from behind and zipped up the back of my pencil skirt. Laid a warm kiss on the back of my neck. "Anthony Thumbelli runs the mob in Trenton. His brother was a trigger man for Grizzoli, but he was still family. His viewing will likely be a who's who of the Trenton mob scene as they pay their respects. It's a gesture I would usually make in private, but considering the circumstances I might make an exception."

"The circumstances being the gang thing? Or the circumstances being me?"

"Both. It's not a secret that you're a close associate of mine. If you attend an event like this, it might be assumed you're representing me."

"And that could go either way, right?"

He smiled.

I didn't see any backup when we parked the Cayenne in front of the little row house my parents lived in, but that didn't mean anything. Thanks to Nollen, I knew there was likely a small army of highly trained soldiers watching our backs from some covert location nearby. Ranger's eyes scanned the street when he got out of the car and walked around to my side.

Grandma was standing at the screen door. "Well, don't you look nice?" she said to Ranger. "This one cleans up real good."

"You should see him in a tux," I told her. Almost as good as him in nothing at all. Ranger put a hand on my back and I caught the smile he was trying to hold in. He was reading minds again. Or maybe he'd just had the same thought. It had been less than twenty minutes since I last saw him naked.

My father glanced up from the television when we came in. Just a cursory once over that said That guy again, huh? And then he went back to his show. No muss. No fuss. That was the nice thing about my dad. He didn't sweat over little things like his daughter bringing Batman home for dinner.

My mother, on the other hand, was not as easy going. "Stephanie, could you help me in the kitchen please?"

Uh oh. This had trap written all over it. Unfortunately, knowing that didn't get me out of it.

Her back was to me when I braved my way into the kitchen. "Would you ladle the gravy into the gravy boat for me?" A reasonable request. That would hold me down in one place for interrogation because denying a daughterly duty wasn't an option. I resigned myself and got out the gravy boat. "So. You're spending a lot of time with Ranger lately."

"We're working a case together. My FTA is a key witness in his fugitive investigation."

"But you brought him home for dinner."

"I've brought him for dinner before. We're friends. I bring friends to dinner all the time."

"Friends don't go to Hawaii together."

"That was work too, remember?"

"I just don't understand why you'd break up with Joseph for a man like him."

"I didn't break up with Joe for Ranger. Joe and I agreed things weren't working and we needed some space. End of story."

Grandma came in through the kitchen door. "Ranger's a hot one, but he's not much fun. He wouldn't tell me about the head he found in your fridge. Said it was part on an open investigation."

My mother made the sign of the cross. "You never had body parts in your refrigerator before you started working for your no good cousin Vinnie."

"Yeah, and remember how boring that was?" Grandma said. "And now she gets to have all kinds of adventures and hang around with hot guys. Admit it, Helen. That Ranger is real handsome."

"Like the devil himself."

This conversation was making my stomach hurt.

"You know, Mona Torelli's son just moved back from managing a project oversees. Isn't that exotic?"

Yep. Hurting big time. I hurried with the gravy and handed the boat to Grandma. "I'll be right back. I've got to freshen up before we eat."

"Got a do your business, huh?" Grandma asked. "I hear ya. You want us to wait on you?"

"No." Jeez. "I'll just be a second. I swear."

I hurried up the stairs. My parent's house was built shotgun style. A living room, dining room and kitchen all lined up with three bedrooms upstairs. Perfect for young couples or retirees. That also meant there was only one bathroom, on the second floor. This was good news for me, since it gave me an excuse to get away. I thought the pain in my stomach would stop after I made my escape. It didn't.

Turns out, it wasn't just the conversation. It was cramps. The official not pregnant signal from God. Hallelujah! I don't think I've ever been so relieved to get cramps in all my life. I made use of what I'd left behind on previous visits with my parents and went back to the dinner table.

When I got downstairs, Ranger was sitting in the chair next to mine having an honestogod conversation with my father. How weird is that?

What was even weirder was the tiny little hint of regret that I couldn't explain. It's not like either of us wanted me to be pregnant. Ranger was keeping a close count on the days because he was responsible and cautious. Fully aware of his culpability. Ready to step in out of duty like he did with Julie. Financial support. Protection. But he wasn't interested in a real relationship. The price was too high. Ranger couldn't do emotional intimacy. Or offer stability or any kind of commitment.

And I'd just realized I couldn't keep doing whatever this was without it. It was too risky. If I had been pregnant, life as I knew it would have been over. I would have been launched over the abyss with no promise of solid ground on the other side. And no parachute.

Stupid heart. Why did it have to have needs? Why couldn't it just let my body enjoy Ranger without having to get all attached? Things would be so much easier if it was just sex. If I was capable of taking the gratification and moving on when it was over.

But I wasn't.

Truth is, I loved him. Because I was an idiot. The kind that doesn't know how to let go of the hot pan before getting burned.

My mother and grandmother brought out the last couple dishes and took their seats. Surrounding the table on all sides. This presented a dilemma. I knew Ranger would want to know that I was officially not pregnant. But I didn't see a way of telling him without the sharp-eared spectators catching wind. It would have to wait until we got to the viewing, when Grandma would be too busy to notice a little private conversation.

By the time my mother served the pineapple upside-down cake, I was ready to start biting my nails. Not Ranger. He was perfectly at ease. Like he was everywhere. Drinking his coffee with a little smile that said I was amusing him. His arm around the back of my chair. Finally, Grandma put me out of my misery. "We better get going if we wanna get good seats. This'll be a big one, what with it being a murder and all. Those always get real crowded."

"You are responsible for her," mom said to me. "Do not let her cause another scene like she did last time."

"Last time wasn't my fault," Grandma said. "That lid sprang open all on its own. It was fate."

"It was you with a nail file. You can't do that. It's upsetting. They have closed casket funerals for a reason."

"People feel deprived when they don't get a chance to see the deceased. How are we supposed to know who's in there? It could be anybody. How do we know they're even dead?"

My mother made the sign of the cross again and cut her eyes to me. "Keep her under control, or I'm not making another pineapple upside-down cake for a year."

I thought this was an overestimation of my abilities, but there was no point in making that argument. I tried to hold in my sigh and failed.

Ranger nodded to my father, politely thanked my mother for the meal, and then stood so he could pull out my chair. He thought this was hilarious. Ranger had an odd sense of humor.

He let us into the Cayenne and drove to the funeral home. I wasn't the least surprised that a black SUV pulled away from a spot right up front when we got there. I was betting there was a pretty decent Rangeman presence. Grandma was beaming.

"We should do this with Ranger more often," she said to me on the sly. "I can't remember the last time I got to park so close."

"He has good parking karma," I said. I didn't think it was smart to let Grandma know what a big deal this was. She might get ideas. Ranger pulled into the spot.

Then his phone started buzzing. He looked at the screen. Might as well have frowned. "What is it?" I asked.

"Break in. Looks like multiple locations." He hit a button and pressed the phone to his ear. After a moment, the frown became more pronounced. "Have we confirmed the breach?" Another moment. "Redirect whatever resources are necessary without breaking protocol. Lock it down. I'm on my way in." He hung up. "Change of plans, Babe. I have to head back to Rangeman."

"How many locations are being hit?"

"Six."

"Oh boy."

"Yeah. Someone's trying to stretch my resources thin. Could be it's a test run to clock response time, but there's a small chance this might precipitate a move on Rangeman. Scatter my forces to make the building vulnerable. I'll leave a couple guys to watch your Granny, but we need everyone else to cover all bases."

"I understand. We'll be fine."

Ranger turned to look at me. "Babe. I'd be happier if you were at Rangeman with me."

"I can't. I promised my mom I'd look after Grandma."

"Babe."

"We'll be fine. Promise," I said. I spotted Pritchard outside the front door with Carson and a few other men that had Fed written all over them. Must have been because of the mob connection. I caught sight of a couple local cops, too. "Look. Both FBI and DEA are here. And that's Morelli's SUV parked right over there. This is probably the safest place to be tonight next to Rangeman."

Ranger wasn't convinced. I cut my eyes to the rearview mirror to remind him Grandma was watching with baited breath. It would make it more difficult to drag me off. Difficult, not impossible. But that was enough trouble that he didn't have the time to afford it. He opened the glove compartment. "You're familiar with the panic button. Keep it on your person at all times. Not just in your purse. Got it?"

"Got it." I took the device and stuck it in my bra. A little light sparked in his eyes. If Grandma hadn't been in the car, he might have hauled me into his lap and gotten a little more creative about where to put it.

He smiled. There he went, reading minds again.