Top of the morning to you! Real quick, I don't own SOA stuff, Kurt Sutter does, I just own my own characters, Esther, Jack and Everett, Sailor and her daughter Madison. And I hereby lay claim to Kary even if I hate her, because she's important... Boo Kary!
He had to lay extremely low. And he knew that very much. He was dying to see his daughter, but if he was even seen by Esther, he could kiss his daughter goodbye for good.
When he got to Sailor's house, Victor was already there, he came by motorcycle, Happy was unannounced, as always, he still didn't have Sailor's phone number. The kid was playing alone on her swing, she looked pretty dejected of being alone, laying belly first on the seat and swinging back and forth unconvincingly, her feet never leaving the ground.
-Hi, Happy.
Damn, she even sounded beyond dejection and boredom, did that kid still nap in the afternoon? Maybe this one just needed a few hours of sleep.
-Hey, Knightess of Chaos. What are you doing, all alone?
-You gonna sit with me?
-Mom home?
-Inside, with daddy. Sit with me?
He didn't really want to, but he popped a toothpick in his mouth and sat right on the ground against the fence after getting in the perimeter, Madison turned her head towards him, she managed a smile.
-You want to play?
-Not really. Mommy was sad.
-Why?
-Dunno.
He tried his hardest not to laugh as she has a really over-exaggerated sigh, she stops her swinging back and forth, flops onto her back and tosses her arms over her head, sighing again.
-What the heck is wrong with you?
-Everything.
-What are you, three?
-And a half. Mommy said no for a puppy.
-Why not?
-Because there's going to be a new baby.
-Where?
-I don't even know anymore.
Happy frowns, that kid is so dramatic. And he feels pretty ridiculous for trying to pry information out of a three years old, who's clearly acting distraught because baby and no puppy. Guess that the Kartrashian clone Sailor hates so much is knocked up.
-I would have loved to have a little brother or sister. In a sense, I got plenty of siblings, it's just that we don't have the same parents. You're going to have a sibling, it can't be that bad. Maybe when your dad's baby's older, you can get a puppy?
-Daddy has dogs. I want mommy to get a dog.
-Why couldn't your mom get a puppy if your da...
He pauses, like it's been uploading in his head so far, and finally he had all the data. Madison has another sigh as he's quiet for five whole seconds, it's timed just so to mean something like "Yeah, finally, you get it", but she's way to young to have such timing on purpose.
He pulls himself up, tosses the toothpick towards the curb and goes for the front door, lets himself in, he's got cold shivers in his arms and spine, goosebumps as he crosses to the kitchen.
"Maddie, baby, shut the front door, please."
Did he not shut it? Guess not, he's just wanting to get to Sailor, and get the truth from her.
In the kitchen, Victor and Sailor are sitting across from each other, each with a coffee mug in front of them, between them, the phone book, Victor sees him first, clears his throat and says he'll go outside with Madison, it makes Sailor raise her head from the phone book she was searching in.
-Wait, where are you going?
-It's not my business anymore, Sail.
-What do you mean it's not your b...
Her cheeks flush when she sees Happy, he is now close enough to see what she was searching in the phone book. Abortion Alternatives. Just the idea that she would consider that makes him want to murder her. Her mouth gapes, her can see the hair rising on her arms.
-Listen, you bailed on me last weekend, and I had no way to reach you. I didn't even know if you'd come back at all, and there's so many hoes out there aborting that there's a four week waiting list. I just wanted to be on the list in case. And Victor was just helping me consider my options, in case you wouldn't com...
-Is it mine?
She's quiet for a second, rubbing her tongue against her palate, he notices she got her tongue pierced.
-When I see someone, Happy, I don't see anyone else. And before you, I'd been alone for a few months. So yes, it is yours. I'm not five months pregnant, I'm only a few weeks along. You look like you could punch me in the head.
He points the phone book, before grabbing it and chucking it out of the closed window, it shatters it, making Sailor scream as she's pulling herself up, she's got a look of disbelief on her face.
-Why the fuck d'you do that, man? I'll go to your house and bust your damn windows!
-You're not getting on any fucking abortion lists until we talked this through. Is that clear?
-If we talk about it for four weeks, Happy, I'm gonna be too late, if we decided we're not having this baby together. And it's not a decision I'm gonna take lightly. You're here two nights a week for the fucks, man! That sure as shit don't mean we're meant to be parents together, and I'm pushing 37, man! I ain't raising another kid by myself. Third time ain't a charm. I raised one for seventeen years, man, all on my own, and look how badly it ended.
-That wasn't your fucking fault, Sailor! If you raised your older kid like you're raising Madison, it sure as hell ain't your fault. As far as I can tell, you're a good mother.
Sailor takes a deep breath, no ok, it is cold in here, she's got the AC cranked so high that it feels like a refrigerator in this place. He can't hide his shivering.
-You want a sweater? I got hot flashes from hell.
-Yeah, if you don't mind.
She goes and gets a sweater form her room, gives it to him, and pulls him into a hug once he puts it on and zips it up.
-I'm sorry. I just... I wasn't going to do it without talking to you first, but... There was the consideration that maybe you weren't coming back.
-You want to marry me, Sailor? And we can have this kid together. It's here, now. And I'm here, now.
She doesn't move, doesn't reply, she's just cuddled against him, and he doesn't have a clue himself where this came from. He never saw himself married, not even to his exes; even now that he asked, it didn't really occur to him how they could make this work. He lived and worked in Charming. She lived and worked in LA, and she had a kid with a guy from LA.
-I can't earn my living, pregnant, Happy. And I'm an independent contractor, I can't benefit from unemployment. If we keep this baby, you'll have to fully support me, financially.
-Do me a favor. Get Madison a puppy.
-I'm not going to get married shotgun again, Happy. I was miserable. I didn't know my first husband when I married him, and it was the most miserable years of my life. I need a way out, if things don't work out, and I don't have the savings for a divorce. I put Minnie through that, I'll be damned if I ever put Maddie through that. I don't know you well, Happy, and I don't know how we'd be, together.
That is fair enough. They haven't even known a month, yet, and she's got a very valid point. If they loved each other, it may be different, but this wasn't a young adult, a 23 years old without a clue. That was a woman who has two kids, two marriages, and nearly twenty years of adult life and experiences under her belt. And little she did know about him, pushing 50, enforcer for an MC, just did nearly a decade in jail, yet she would still give him a chance to be in this kid's life? Would she?
-You're gonna let me be that kid's dad?
-If you're a good dad, I will. But I promise you, you ever raise a hand on that kid, or be neglectful or abusive, you will never see me or him or her, ever again, Happy. I never tolerated that from Minnie's genitor, I would never tolerate it from Victor, and I will never tolerate it from you either.
-I would never harm any of my kids, not Everett, and not this one. I've gotten her a lawyer. Same lawyer that you got your older kid to terminate your first husband. I'm going to try and get her custody, Sailor. I want to be a father for Everett, but my ex won't let me.
-That's so wrong.
-I know. I have to sneak around to see Everett. She texted me this week that she wanted to see me this weekend, but she sent me another text that since her mother's husband split, she never had a single second to herself, her mother's smothering her, she can't even call that lawyer.
-What does she have this weekend?
-Soccer game, tomorrow.
-I can go. Tape it for you, so you can see it.
-You'd do that?
-On one condition.
-What?
-No sneaking around. It can look very bad on you, if you get caught. You need to gain official visitation through lawyers. Get your lawyer to call her lawyer and Esther's lawyer.
-I don't know who Esther's lawyer is.
-They will contact Esther, and tell her to get one. That's what happened with my ex. Don't sneak around, Happy. It's dangerous, and it can hurt your case.
-Ok. What if she calls me?
-it's better if you two have no contact for now. Once Everett is in contact with your lawyer, they can state their intention of establishing a contact with you, I guess. Then you can talk to her on the phone.
-You know so much stuff.
-I've just been a parent longer.
-If I asked you to marry me so Everett had a safety net if something happened to Esther or me?
-Now you're just playing with my heartstrings, Lowman.
-Nice dress, wanna fuck?
She laughs, shakes her head, no, she doesn't want to fuck right now, even if she finds it funny. And she's not letting go of him, she's still hugging him, she wasn't so cuddly the last weekends he was here. Then again, everything has changed once again. He rubs her back, takes his whole life and what he knows of hers into consideration, tries to find a way. There has to be a way.
-You know, I wanted kids, before. Like twenty years ago, with one of my exes. And I realize now, as much as I wanted kids with her, the concept of family never alluded me.
-How can you want kids with someone without being a family?
-I'm complicated like that.
-Do you want a family, now?
Pushing fifty, and including his new baby mama's ex-boyfriend and their daughter? The transgender dead kid. The distance between Compton and Charming. Everett and Esther.
Sailor is a good mother. Her kids come first, he has this feeling about that. Did she not contract a sham marriage in order to afford the kid she had? She got big money out of it, shame she lost it to a Ponzi scheme, but she has it in her to take care of her kids the best way she ever learned how.
-I don't have money like Victor does. My income comes from a bar I never visit, a part-time job in a tattoo parlor, a part-time job in a garage and being an enforcer for the Sons.
-It's not about money. A baby is not as ridiculously expensive as it appears to be. Shit, we were broke as a joke during my first marriage, but Minnie always had everything she needed but a decent father. The no sleeping part is worst than the no money part.
-I want to be a family. You, me, Everett on weekends, Madison and our baby.
-Did you mean it, Happy? Getting married to have a safety net for your daughter?
-If I get my paternity recognized, and something happens to me or her mother, Kary gets my daughter, I'm sure. I would rather take my own life than have Kary Lamontagne raise my daughter.
-I want a prenup, Happy. One that says that if I need out, you'll let me go.
-We don't need a prenup. I'm not a monster. If you want to go, go. But just don't keep our kid from me.
-I wouldn't. Ever. As long as you were good to him or her.
There's nothing left to discuss, at least for Happy. They're keeping the kid, they'll get married eventually, to nip Esther's plans of raising a man-hating cunt, and they'll do their best to be a happy family. Whether it be in Charming, Compton or to include a lot of traveling remains to be decided, it can't be decided until the lawyers are involved, but he has a feeling Sailor's going to try and facilitate as much as she can.
-What's for tonight?
-There's nothing going on until you fix this damn window you just busted, man! And you pick the glass up, before my kid slices herself on it.
Oh, the want to hurt her, ever so present. Happy hates being told what to do by women, aside form his mother, and Silk because she was blind. But he is the one that broke the window throwing a phone book through it, when he could have tossed it in the living room, or the hallway.
She's helping him picking up the glass when Victor comes back in the house, to check on Sailor, make sure she was fine before he left with Madison, it took everything he had in him not to snap at Victor that it was his job to look after her now. But he couldn't do that. Because they had history. A lot of history, and a kid, together. Their friendship, if he understood correctly, goes back at least a decade.
-We're taking off, Sail. You're fine?
-Yeah. Happy got mad at the phone book.
-Come on over here.
She drops the broom, and goes to get herself a big bear hug and a kiss on the temple, Happy hears Victor say that if she needs anything, she better call, no matter the time. Damn, is that guy doing it on purpose?
But Sailor turns her head towards him, he's stubbornly looking down at the floor not to send anyone murderous stares, she has a smile in her voice.
-You know what? I think Happy's going to have me covered all weekend. It's just a window.
-Alright. Have a good weekend, guys.
-Wait! Send Maddie inside? I don't want to go out there, I'll want to die from the heat.
-Yeah.
Victor leaves, closes the door behind him, he bites his lips shut a second longer.
-Thanks. For that.
-We still have plenty of talking to do, but I meant it, Hap.
-So did I.
-What do you m...
Interrupted, by her daughter barging in, screaming that she would never leave her without saying I love you, that kid is so dramatic. Guess she takes it from her mother, who puts a comparable amount of drama on to nearly scream that nothing can keep them apart, nor hot flashes or traffic, and that they will always belong together for the happy ending. They hug, Madison turns to leave, before running to Happy, he raises a hand to keep her at a safe distance, there's some glass on the floor, still.
-Careful, I broke the window.
-Are you staying with mom?
-Yeah.
-Ok. Make sure she doesn't cry because I'm gone.
-I'll do my best?
-Ok. Bye!
She runs off, Sailor had sat against the table, she watches her daughter leave, before upping the drama.
-Oh! Ah! Be still, my broken heart! I'm dying! What a world! Urgh! Argh! What a slow and painful death!
-Stop being such a drama queen!
The door slams, there's a heavy two second of silence after Victor yelled as loud as he could before slamming the door hard, and both her, Victor and Madison outside burst into laughter, he decides to join in, ok, that was funny enough.
-Is it always so dramatic in here?
-Oh, yeah. The house is going to be dead quiet, I'll be reading in my bed and Maddie's going to be watching TV, and she'll scream, like a freaking banshee. "Oh, God, why are you SO weird!", and I better find something witty to reply, and fast, or else she's getting all huffy.
-What would you answer?
-Anything, really? One time, I neighed like a horse. That made her laugh. You know, my second husband always used to say, "We're happy. Bitches hate that." That or "I cut an inch off of every straw I see, just to make the world suck a little less."
-Did he?
-Oh hell yeah. It used to drive me nuts, I would find inch-long pieces of drinking straw everywhere, all the time. He read that in a Jarrod Kintz book, and he loved how it sounded.
-You loved your second husband?
-We got along. He was different. And he always treated me really well. I was never in love with him. It was clear, you know, green card and business opportunity.
They're quiet, for a long while, until he's done patching up the window, she made dinner, they ate quietly, and she turned down the AC after her hot flashes passed, and she asked they went and laid down together for a while. Maybe have sex a little. Maybe get to know each other a little better.
Thought?