The next few days went too fast. Regina and Emma loved to talk about everything and nothing. They didn't talk much about Regina's early years because Emma could feel she is not completely comfortable with it. And that is alright with her, she knew Regina eventually would come around when she felt safe enough. Regina on the other hand had the feeling that she held back, she Emma knew was a young woman who probably was sexually very active in her past and is now holding back. So she thought about it a lot when they just sat there snuggled together on the big sofa in Emma's room and watched movies.
"A Penny for your thought" Emma asked.
Regina felt trapped and she often thought about it "I thought a lot about …you know… I can't promise you when I will be ready to be completely with you" and with that said her face was red again. Regina didn't want to talk about sexual desires, in a way she was a virgin.
"Honey it's alright I will wait for you…can I ask you something?" Regina nodded "Sure". "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to…have you ever …you know…slept with someone?" Regina blushed and felt ashamed "I...it's …how…I …" but Emma interrupted "Hey its okay you don't have to tell me, I don't want to make you feel bad, I was just curious you know…"
She collected all her strength – this was Emma, her Emma and she knew she could trust her. "I want to tell you Emma but it's not something I'm proud of. I haven't slept with someone." Regina told her and pronounced the word slept very thoughtfully.
"There was never the right person I felt comfortable with sharing my secret. Sure I had boyfriends in the past but they all were just for the public. I had a girlfriend once Danielle but the moment I told her I'm a transwoman, she freaked out and left. She was about to blow everything for me but my agent called her off with the right amount of money and a new start in another country. She took the money and I never heard from her again, it makes me even stronger in my opinion to never fall in love. Till I found you"
Emma watched her in admiration. She was so strong and so vulnerable at the same time. Squeezing a little closer Emma hugged her tightly.
"A few years back I was in Thailand for the first time during break from Happy Endings. There they are used to girls that have a penis. I hooked up with some girls who didn't know who I was, but it was nothing more than a blow job. I couldn't. It didn't feel right" and with that revelation Regina started to cry in Emma's arms.
"Psssttt, baby its okay don't cry, please you are such a strong woman. I adore you and I will be honored if you ever choose to want to sleep with someone and that someone is me."
"It will be you Emma but I just can't right now"
"It's okay honey I told you I will wait because you are worth it. You are worth everything"