Another Kind of Wedding Night – Come closer

Kate's tears finally stopped. She felt so safe in Caroline's arms and had allowed herself to wallow in thoughts and feelings she'd suppressed for quite a while. Not being able to give Richard the one thing he had so desperately wanted had always played heavily on her mind, even after they were divorced. She had been angry, very angry with him for constantly telling her that the problem had to hers; but he told her so often that ultimately she just believed him.

She stroked her kicking baby and for the first time felt a peace; at last carrying a child to term and hearing what she'd just heard.

"Kate, it seems there's a lot about each other that we still don't know."

"Yes, I suppose there is, but I've always wanted to leave the rough stuff alone, Caroline. I'm so happy when we're together that I've never wanted to sour that with bad memories."

"That's understandable; but for example it just occurred to me; I have no idea what your married name was."

"McKenzie. I didn't change it; partly because I wanted to keep my own name and partly because as I told you, Richard and I used to work at the same refuge and it was just easier."

"So what's his name?" Caroline had an ulterior motive for wanting this information.

"Cox, Richard Cox."

"Right; does he keep in touch with Greg?"

"No way; Greg couldn't stand him; he hated the way Richard treated me about the miscarriages. I often think that might be one reason he was so willing to help us. He's a good man Caroline and despite your initial feelings about him, I know you'll come to see that in time."

Caroline eased herself alongside Kate; "Come closer, come as close as we can." Love making came gently and it was soothing and warm and in the midst of it Kate knew that nothing Richard could say; nothing from the past was beyond Caroline's healing touch. Feeling whole again, she fell into a deep sleep.

"Can I help you Dr McKenzie?" the desk clerk asked. Caroline thought of correcting him and insisting on her full name; but thought better of it. The task at hand was more important.

"Would you mind ringing Mr Richard Cox, a guest here, and asking if he would mind meeting me in the foyer?"

"Certainly." The clerk rang through and fortunately Richard answered. "He says he'll come straight away." Caroline nodded in thanks and then made her way to a large armchair to wait for him.

As he approached, she stood up. "Thanks for agreeing to see me Richard; can we go into the garden?" Richard agreed and they took residence on a bench that was out of earshot of the others.

"I'm not sure if Kate will love me or kill me for this but I really wanted to talk to you."

"Where is Kate?" "Oh she's asleep; as you can imagine, the combination of the massage and the bombshell would be enough to knock anybody out; especially at her stage of pregnancy." There was no need to include the rest.

"Yes, yes I suppose it would. I really didn't want to hurt or upset her Caroline. I have been telling myself since finding out about my problem, that I really ought to try to make amends for what I put Kate through. Strangely I also thought that she still had time to have a baby and might try again if she knew she wasn't the one with the problem."

"I understand that, and I appreciate what you've done. However, you must realise that making a choice to try again was not without its problems for Kate; well actually for both of us. That's stuff that neither she nor I want to keep revisiting. We're ecstatic about this baby; it will mean the world to Kate. I already have two teenage sons."

"Really, I had no idea. How is this relationship for them?"

Caroline stared hard at him; pulling back on the outrage she could feel building. Calmly but firmly she responded. "I'm sorry but that's not something that you and I need to share; Kate wouldn't want that either. We have no need to intrude into our respective private lives."

"No of course, I'm sorry. I suppose I can see how happy Kate is and dare I say it, how in love you are; I felt a twinge of jealousy if the truth be told. There was a time when Kate and I were in love too and I married her with the intention of being with her forever."

"Yes well I know that feeling; but sometimes life throws us a curved ball and we have to carry on. I'm just very blessed that Kate came into my life. She's everything I've ever dreamed of and more. So I guess what I'm saying Richard is that now you've told Kate, please let her be. If there's any fallout, she and I will deal with it together. We should just go our separate ways now. I hope for you and Sally that you will find a way to have a family. It isn't impossible; we managed it."

Richard could feel a lump in his throat. This wasn't the ending he wanted. He wanted to get Kate alone and talk with her. However, he could see that it just wasn't going to happen; certainly not this weekend.

Caroline stood up and for some reason found herself squeezing his arm as she wished him well and walked away.

Kate stirred as she heard Caroline come into the room. "Where've you been?"

"I've been talking to Richard."

Kate sat bolt upright. "You've what?"

"I'm sorry if it's not what you would have wanted, but I just felt I had to."

"Well what did you both say?" Caroline relayed the conversation almost verbatim and as she did she could see Kate softening. "Wow, that was something Caroline; what made you want to do that?"

"Well a couple of reasons. We know how hard it can be when an ex inserts himself into the new equation whether it's wanted or not. I had a feeling watching him earlier that he was on the verge of wanting to reconnect with you. In a bizarre way, maybe try to experience the pregnancy vicariously; you know as if it were somehow something to do with him."

"That's very insightful Caroline; however it could also be psychobabble." Caroline looked somewhat startled by this remark. Kate pulled her close and kissed her deeply. "My hero." She whispered; Caroline heaved a sigh of relief.

As they approached the dining room for dinner, both women noticed Richard and Sally at a table in the far corner. Kate whispered something to the waiter and he guided them to a seat as far from them as possible. Out of the corner of her eye, Kate saw Richard look over at which point she reached across the table and put her hand over Caroline's. She had come to the conclusion that Caroline's approach was a good one and that she would keep her distance.

While they waited for their meal, Kate began to regale Caroline with stories of her childhood; things she had never shared before. It had touched a bit of a raw nerve when her wife had said that there were lots of things they still didn't know. Caroline roared out loud at some of the goings on; then grieved for Kate as she told her of initial racial taunts when she started primary school.

Caroline responded in kind and it soon became clear that Kate's childhood had, on the whole, been more relaxed and happy than hers. They found themselves almost setting goals for how they would keep their little girl feeling loved and happy. The evening passed leisurely and Kate suggested they go into the bar for half an hour so that Caroline could have a night cap before they went to bed.

Half way through Caroline's whiskey, Richard and Sally walked in. Richard looked longingly at Kate but she simply waved and turned back to Caroline, again taking hold of her hand and leaning in to kiss her on the cheek. Caroline watched as they turned on their heels and left the bar.

Climbing into bed, Kate sighed; "God what a day; such an unexpected day. But you know darling, I feel that it's been good. A weight has been lifted from me; like being found not guilty of a crime that you were suspected of committing. I looked at Richard tonight and I felt a deep sorrow. He did love me I know that; but it wasn't just about not having children; we were in trouble for other reasons."

She turned to Caroline and ran her fingers softly along her cheek, following it with the lightest kisses. "We've got so much going for us; so much to look forward to."

"We have my darling; we have."