I came home bone ass tired as usual. Nothing new about that. When you wake up at dawn and do countless tasks at work, don't eat as much and trudge on to do everything else, it really gets to you.

My migraine's kicking up again. I get home to my mom on the computer. It's Facebook marathon for her 24/7. My dad and brother are asleep because they work during night shifts. Guess I'm not in the mood to cook. Maybe I can just take a nap first.

I wake up and it's dawn already. Again? I think my body's giving up on me. I check my messages and see some texts.

Sugar Motta: Hi Britts, get together soon. Miss you girl.

Sam Evans: Hey, hope you're doing great. I miss your messages.

I met Sam when I went to this seminar thing I was sent to last month. I actually like him, since he's really nice and good looking. I think we have this connection. This is normal for me. I like guys and girls. When Sam got my number before I left his town, I didn't hesitate. I was single. I didn't notice Santana's gorgeousness back then. But that all changed when I went back and gravitated towards Santana.

Admittedly at first, I didn't think the office had so many hot people. Maybe because I had my eyes set on Sam even though it was a long distance thing. But it was like a fog was lifted from my eyes when I took notice of Santana. Everything changed. I wasn't so into Sam. I wasn't rushing to my locker to get to my phone to text him but instead, I was rushing there to see her.

That's why I feel guilty when I see Sam's message. I just don't know if I'm guilty cause I'm not replying to him or I'm guilty cause I have or had this thing with him while I somehow like Santana. Either way, Santana doesn't even see me as her friend yet.. I think. So why am I so keen to be available for her? Ugh. I'm hopeless.

I get to the office with my earphones blasting a sexy rap song. Yeah, I wanna get in the zone before I start my day with some hot lyrics coursing through my body, sue me. Nearing my locker, I get looks from the others. Hmm. Wonder why? Is it my music? Oh, okay.. I'm wearing my new skirt. You see, since a few weeks ago, I started getting skinnier. Maybe it's the stress or the lack of time to eat but I bought new skirts and pants to fit me better.

I start my day with frantic phone calls to tardy and absentee employees while computing everyone's attendance bonuses. I assist applicants and do some more paperwork. I also get to work on the fun things like talking with employees who have offenses- Yay. Not. I get to make people miserable. This job is taking it's toll on my morale.

I take my morning break. It's only 15 minutes but I'll take what I can get. I head to my locker in search of my phone. It's another text from Sam. Hmp. I feel heavier. Should I just ignore him until he leaves alone?

I head to the comfort room to wash my face. I'm getting sleepy already. I open the door and bam! It's Santana fuckin Lopez. Checking her beautiful beautiful face. I scurry over to the stall. I'm not ready to talk to her yet!

When I've calmed myself down. I walk to the sink slowly and say "Hey." I know. Very original. She says hey back. Then I notice my hair in the mirror. Jesus Christ! I can see new white hairs sprouting all over.

"More white hairs! Great." I say forlornly and she laughs adorably.

I smile because of that. She takes one more look at her plump lips in the mirror and leaves. It takes me a few more seconds to snap out of my Santana induced daze. This girl is really something. Just one laugh of hers gets me all giddy and awake.

I go back to work for a little bit before my lunch break. I'm trying to finish up preparing for our company's upcoming event. We'll be going bowling. I know we work hard but we also have these kinds of events that lets the employees relax. Well, they relax while I fuss over everything.

Lunch time comes and I see her in the pantry eating her packed lunch with a few seats on her left and right unoccupied. I think the others are definitely intimidated with her. I mean, who wouldn't be? She's really smart and pretty. Brains and beauty right there. I can also guess just from how she acts that she's a nice person. Total package.

Anyway, I walk over to this little corner of mine on the left side. It's always been my seat since I don't really like to be disturbed too much. So she's just over there doing her thing, using her phone. Maybe texting her boyfriend? Cmon, someone that beautiful must have some people wanting to be committed to her. Another opportunity missed as I really don't have the courage to come up to her and just talk. She leaves but then someone sits beside me.

One of her closest friends, Quinn Fabray, plops down to my right and begins eating. We're really not that close but somehow she had begun talking to me a few weeks before. I think it's weird how she likes to always talk to me and constantly badgers me with questions. Anywho, she's friends with Santana so I'll just take what I can get.

As Quinn is asking me about something, she pops up the golden question: "Hey, would you like to have a smoke break?"

"Duh. Let's go! I've been itching to have someone to smoke with. Though I'm trying to quit, the stress is about to kill me." I eagerly replied.

It seems that we have the same lunch break so we take advantage and quickly go down to have that smoke. She tells me about her; how she's gay and it turns out that we went to the same college. How awesome is that? She's a whole lot older though so I'm not familiar with her batchmates.

I asked if she likes anyone in the office and duh, she said that long time ago she had the hots for Santana. I didn't get the chance to question her more cause our time is up.

As we're going up the elevator, there is just one thing running through my mind. Is Santana gay? Well, it doesn't mean that if Quinn liked her before that she's gay. Lesbians have straight girl crushes all the time. It's one of the unfortunate curses of liking those beatiful creatures called women.

Even if she is a lesbian, I wouldn't have a chance with her. I mean, have you seen her? Like today, she's wearing the standard office provided top. But we're allowed to wear whatever pants or skirt (in accordance to company colors) that we like. She makes that top look like it came from a magazine. We're wearing the same top, how the hell can she do that? She's wearing this black mini skirt with flowy things until an inch above her knee. She has black strappy heels adorning her ankles that makes me want to untangle each and every one of those. She's also wearing her sexy as fuck glasses today that makes her look like a sexy librarian with a bad attitude. And don't get me started on her hair, just don't. It's one of the things (besides her killer smile) that just ugh! It's really long and silky, okay? Can I just go over there, run my hands through it, maybe smell it a bit and just walk away? Creepy alert.

Wait, is that her coming this way? Shit. Shit. I'm not ready. And where the hell are my shoes? Just when I thought to slip it off to relax my feet. Shit. Imma look retarded with my bare feet all about this place if she wants to talk to me.

Oh... She wants to use the phone. Okay, yeah. Sure. Just smile and don't make it seem you're disappointed she didn't talk to you. Don't be weird Britt. Argh I can't concentrate knowing she's just a few steps away from me. Should I just pretend to type away? Hold some papers or something?

She's done now. She left. Why am I so disappointed that she didn't talk to me? The phone is there for everyone's use. It's not my own phone. She doesn't need my permission.

Hey, she's heading back over! Aaaaand, she's making a call again. Be cool, Britts. She walks out but sends a smile my way. Oh, my heart. It's tripping all over this girl. Please make hundred phone calls. Use my computer. Can I be your personal assistant? I can do your work, or massage you? Or just be your personal sex slave? Oops, too far. Back to work Britts. Boss lady is giving you the stinky eyes again.

Since our office is designed to have 2 wings with an open area with sections, our boss lady and Rachel is just a few steps from me. We also have Mercedes and Shelby from Finance nearby. Speaking of Rachel, she's speaking with Santana's boss, Kurt. He is admittedly 100% gay and sort of a bitch. He likes to shout and boss around people so much that everyone is a bit irritated and scared of him at the same time.

He comes up to me and asks "Sooo, you have a boyfriend?"

"Hello Kurt, nope. I'm single."

"I don't believe you even for a second. Bet your fine ass has someone. Or wait, are you part of our club? That's why you don't have a boyfriend?"

"Huh? What club? Mile high?" I mused.

"No, you dumbass. We have an unofficial LGBT group of friends here. Me, Quinn, San, and some of the others from the other wing." He clarifies slowly. And with that, I have my answer. Holy hell, it's like there is a door for my love Santana and I that just opened in my head and a song is playing. I am so gonna have my happy dance when he leaves.

"Is that a yes, Britt? So what are you -gay, bi, trans, confused? Are you like one of those who don't have a sexual preference? Cause let me just say, that's just sad Brittany." By this point, boss lady and the whole gang is staring at me. Oh no, I haven't outed myself in my work so officially before.

"Yup, Kurt. I'm bi. I actually had girlfriends and a boyfriend before." I cautiously said with a hint of a myboss and the others' reactions.

"Score! Welcome Britts. Quinn's les, Blaine's gay, Santana's bi but she has a girlfriend now, and some others you'll find out yourself."

And with that, it's as if all the happiness from finding out I had a chance with her got sucked out of my body. I couldn't even reply to Kurt which actually doesn't matter cause Rachel was so busy kissing his ass.

I go home with a heavy heart that day knowing that I won't ever mess up a relationship cause that's just selfish. I don't want to be like other people who cheat or wreck relationships. That is if I even have the slightest chance with her. If I do, well..that would be like the most delicious sin ever.