"OH SHUT UP TOBIAS!" A cold female voice voice rang through the house as if it was enchanted.
"I didn't say anything!" Severus' father replied, he too was shouting.
"No, you're just sat there, mumbling." Eileen sniped sarcastically, "I'm so fed up of you muttering under your breath. If you have something to say then why don't you just say it?" She hissed as a shopping list flew from cupboard to cupboard while a quill took note of the missing items.
"I'm not-"
"I'm going out, I'll be back later. Take care of my son while I'm out." She interrupted as if he hadn't been speaking. Her tone was demanding, but not cruel, and the lack of resistance from Tobias highlighted that this was merely part of an ongoing argument. Severus tried to stay out of it, but it wasn't that easy.
Every morning while he ate his breakfast his mother would tell him how narrow-minded his father was, how he used to be more fun when they first met and of course she would share tales of the selfish and spiteful things he had done in the days before. Then every evening his father would come home from work just after his mother had left for what she told him was a knitting circle (she instead met with the local witches and no doubt spat more venom about her husband) and proceed to rant on about how much simpler life was before he met her, how she was incapable of doing anything without using her magic and how she never did anything useful.
Downstairs the door slammed into the wall as Eileen swung it open.
"After all I do everything else." She mumbled barely audibly as she swept her dark hair from her thin face and stormed out of the door.
There was a haunting silence in the house after she left. At first Severus just lay there in bed, but he soon realised he couldn't stay there all day. He cleaned his room, got dressed and went downstairs to find his father on his knees in the kitchen practically growling to himself. He pulled his head out from the depths of a kitchen cupboard, looked up and tried to smile convincingly as Severus walked in. Tobias looked like an older, greyer version of his son, with the same hooked nose, sunken cheeks and greasy dark hair. He was fairly well-presented, unlike Severus, with roughly ironed and coordinated clothes. Though the creases in his trouser legs were just off centre, which combined with his tall, thin figure made him look a little crooked.
"Morning, your mum's-" his father started as Severus entered the kitchen.
"Yeah I know."
"Alright then, best get some food." He sighed and continued to rummage through the kitchen cupboards and drawers.
Severus wandered into the living room. The walls of their house were an unpleasant shade of eggshell blue that had faded to almost grey over the years and clashed horribly with their tattered beige sofa and chairs which had very obvious patches sewn on in various shades of brown. There were clothes, dirty and clean, strewn all over the furniture and floor where no-one had bothered to put them away. Used plates and mugs littered every flat surface and the ripped, discoloured curtains were drawn to shut out the rest of the world. This may have been their house, but it was no home. Most of the house could be easily cleaned with a little magic, even Severus knew that, but his father would have none of it.
"Damnit Eileen!" Roared his father's voice from the kitchen.
Severus collapsed on the sofa next to a torn pillow and lay his head on the back of the seat putting his head at almost 90 degrees and screwing up his eyes until he could see little stars dancing in the darkness.
"Where does that damned woman put everything?" his father growled.
Severus sighed heavily as the banging and crashing from the kitchen grew louder and his father began swearing loudly. Severus rose to his feet, slowly and effortlessly and strode past the kitchen and out of the back door.
"I'm not hungry father. I'm going to the park." He called as he left.
His parents had been arguing a lot more recently. Not just about magic anymore either, although it had been steadily getting worse as Severus got older and more capable to control his talents. The reality of Severus' inevitable future was slowly dawning on his father, he could no longer ignore the fact that his son was a wizard. Severus believed that their main issue was communication – or lack of it. He just kept his head down, and spent most days out at the park from the moment he was dressed until it was time to head back for dinner. He couldn't bear listening to each of his parents arguments.
He spent each day simply sitting, waiting behind that same flower bush. Though what he was waiting for he wasn't quite sure, Lily had made her intentions painfully clear. Due to this inarguable fact, and his dulled sense of rationalism, Severus had decided that he was not waiting.
He was merely escaping.
It was peaceful, and most days he would simply toy with the fallen flowers behind the bush. Perching them delicately in the palm of his hand he would cause them to open and close repeatedly, just as she had done. It was truly astonishing to him how such a commonplace piece of magic had entertained her. Of course he could do it with ease, on particularly slow days he would cause a multitude of these flowers to whorl around above his collapsed form.
Open and close.
Open and close.
He knew he could show her so much more, more wonders than he was sure she could ever imagine.
The days were getting hotter, and he found sanctuary in the shade of the bush that he had claimed as his own, without notice or dispute from the rest of the world.
One particularly hot day, as he lay within the cover of his now homely bush watching a single, bright flower rotate slowly he began thinking; maybe she would come back, maybe she would realise the error of her ways. She had acted very irrationally after all.. He had only tried to help her understand herself, to let her know that she wasn't some freak of nature.
She wasn't alone, he wasn't alone.
Her and her sister had made a fool of him, acted as though he had insulted them – well he had insulted that unbearable Petunia girl. He felt no regret of that, but Lily should have been pleased! Instead she had been utterly ungrateful, disrespectful and downright rude to him. Of course he would tell her all of this when he saw her again – if he saw her again. He closed his eyes and let the gentle summer's breeze envelop him, he was just beginning to drop odd when a shrill voice slashed through the warm summer's air.
"Lily! LILY! Wait for me!"
Before he knew it Severus was up on his knees, with his pale face brushing the leaves and his dark eyes desperately searching the landscape for that familiar glimmer of red. It was only at that very moment, as his eyes began to focus, that he realised just how busy the park had gotten today. It was as though the world had been un-muted. The delighted screams and laughter of children filled the air while what felt like hundreds of figures danced around the playground.
"C'mon Tuney! Keep up!" giggled a familiar, sweet and satisfying voice.
There was no chance that he could spot her in this crowd, even with her distinctive dark red hair. He couldn't even tell what direction her voice was coming from through all this commotion. Once he had resigned to this fact Severus slumped, sulkily sitting with his back against the bush, fiercely trying to once again drown out the sound of the commotion behind him.
Maybe he should just go home. What was he even doing here? He could hardly confront her today at any rate, not with all of these people around. It had been bad enough when it was just her sister who was there. He didn't think he could handle the ridicule of all of those children. He looked solemnly down at his once again mismatched clothes, he couldn't even bare to be seen by them like this, never mind speak his thoughts to Lily – not in front of all those muggles.
Why had he ever thought that she would be any different, anymore understanding than any one of them? She practically was one of them after all. She'd find out soon enough, when her letter came, then she'd be sorry. Sorry for how unreasonably she had acted, sorry for how she had treated him. How she looked at him.
When she came to him wanting answers, needing him, maybe just maybe he wouldn't be there. Maybe he'd just look at her like she was crazy, and walk away with his head held high. Maybe-
"Hey" came a hushed whisper.
Was that? No- he looked around, he was totally alone. As usual. He laughed at his own foolishness. Merlin's beard he hoped he wasn't going to start hearing voices. He can't be crazy. No he isn't crazy. It must have just been th-
"Hey! I know you're there." That time he was sure he had heard it, sweet and faint. But it was there, and familiar.
"L-Lily?" He asked quietly, surely he wasn't crazy.
"Of course, silly" she said with a giggle, a little too light-heartedly for his liking.
He spun around on the spot desperately searching for a glimpse of her auburn hair, any sign of her. To his dismay he was surrounded by the same solitary landscape he saw every day. How dare she come to him after what she did? How dare she disturb his peace, all to mock him again? Her amusement caused resentment to surge through his body. Now was his chance to tell her how foolish she was, how much he hated the way she had looked through him with her deep emerald eyes.
How insane the sound of her stupid, girlish laughter made him feel.
How her voice was like melted caramel and made his stomach feel like it was full of chocolate frogs – No, he was upset with her and he would let her know. She was no different to them. His cheeks began to glow once again.
"Oh.. Hey" rumbled his feeble voice. Though he wasn't quite sure where it had come from.
No! That wasn't right, he was supposed to be making her feel as small as they'd made him feel.
"What do you want?!" he snapped suddenly. Great now he did sound crazy.
"I'm sorry fo-"
"Don't be sorry you're not disturbing me. I'm sorry for snapping." No he wasn't.. Why should he be sorry, SHE had disturbed HIM.
Why had he said that?
"No. I mean, I'm sorry about how me and Petunia acted last time I saw you"
Of course! Of course that's what she meant. He should have let her finish, she had realised that she'd been foolish, just as he had predicted. Though now he looked like the fool. He was a fool.
"Oh right, erm, yeah sure."
'Ugh you sound so pathetic' sneered his subconscious. 'Tell her! Tell her that it's still not okay. Tell her how unreasonable she was.' But he couldn't stand the thought of upsetting her again.
"Wait. Wh-where are you?" That was a start. He finally felt he was regaining a little control over his own words.
"I'm right behind you Severus."
When she said his name, the rest of the world felt so far away. He felt his cheeks flush brighter and his throat constrict. He liked the way his name sounded when she said it.
"That is your name right?"
"Erm..." his voice was croaking, and cracking. He cleared his throat. "Yeah, I- Yeah that's my name"
Her silky laughter cut through the air.
"Are you sure? You don't sound very sure.." She was smiling, he could hear it. If he closed his eyes he could see it too. "Anyway, I just came to let you know we're sorry." She chimed cheerfully before he had chance to reply. At the recollection of the last time they met he felt a flush of anger once again.
"If Tuney is so sorry then why isn't she here too, any why are you hiding that you're talking to me?" he spat.
"Okay. I'm sorry. But I'm sure I'm sorry enough for both of us. Anyway, you're the one that's hiding." She justified. He could feel her tone dropping, her smile fading, he shouldn't care. No he didn't care.
"Well?.."
"Well what?" He asked, confused but still trying to sound stern. He'd just regained control of himself and he wasn't willing to lose it now.
"Apology accepted?" She hesitated.
'Right, of course.' He thought,
"Yeah, sure. I forgive you." He replied hastily, but making sure to add emphasis, he had no reason, no intention of forgiving her muggle sister. But Lily was special, like him.
"Good." Her reply sounded strained, as if it was fading.
He spun around as quickly as he could, catching his face on a branch as he did. But she was gone, or.. Had she ever been there? Or was this heat truly driving him crazy?