Chapter IV:

Sandal Wood

My eyes blurred in the photograph.

I shook the darn thing until cleared to realize that everything else came out fine other than my eyes.

My mother came around to rest her hand on my shoulder.

"It's fine dear. Now sit down." Her boisterous voice never seemed to get stale with me.

The glass table breathed old memories as we sat down.

"Michelle?"

"Yes?" My eyes stared into her ageless face.

She slouched in her chair.

"Your father...is." Her face contorted as she struggled to speak.

"Was barely here for you." She searched my face as she spoke.

Silently she shifted. "And I know how difficult it was for you to get over it, but your brother never let it go unsaid when he voices it."

"I know."

"And the feeling that formed within him stood timeless within his visage."

She laughed lightly as she straightened her back.

"And I have not let it go unnoticed whenever he follows me around like a lost dog..."

Her eyes looked downcast.

"But even though he is unwell just promise me you'll take care of him. Though he has not the ability to function properly within society..."

...

"He is still like your father no matter what shape or form he is. I know I can't be here forever to take care him, just promise me Michelle."

The bags under her eyes welled.

"Promise me."

I woke up wanting to just disappear so no one else can see me.

I wanted to just never ever wake up.

I wanted no one else to see my shame.

Days passed as I attended school.

Wondering when Aldo will come again to interfere. Wondering when I have to endure another stream of nonsense thrown my way. Wondering when my emotions will hold on enough to endure the eventual breakdown of my sanity.

Wondering when the pain will cease.

Arbitrary nonsense.

My modest attire rarely changed throughout the year. The same brown hair and plain face, lightly tanned skin; a pale Asian woman with no defining features.

Class has begun, the substitute already calling out names for roll call. He does it to see any change in preferences.

"Beans."

"Changed today again it seems Giovanni."

The child in question sheepishly smiled as he scratched his head.

"I'm sorry I can't decide. My mom's cooking is just the bomb ya know."

"Well I guess I'll have to ask you if I could try some of your mom's cooking one of these days. Hmm."

The boy blushed as he avoided his piercing eyes. "I-I..guess."

"Mhhm, now I will go as fast as I possibly can everyone. Shout it loud and quick as I go. Okay?"

"What?", a number of people shouted as he proceeded.

"Fiona Samuel, Suzy."

"Dragon, turnips, pineapple"

"Abbey, Jason, Weston"

"Celery, oranges, potato"

"And April."

"Cabbag-wait."

Everyone just looked at him.

"I'm sorry. April is the last one here who got here on time. Everyone else is either tardy or...just that tardy."

Many of them already dished out excuses as he said this.

"Quiet down...I know it may be hard for some of you to come here on time because of band and the upcoming assembly, but that is no excuse. I know my class isn't boring."

An awkward silence filled the room.

"Is it really that boring?"

Several girls chattered to each other before one of them spoke up.

"Not really. Though I really hate it when you make jokes about seven ate nine and pi."

"Eh? I thought you guys might like that stuff."

Laughter filled the space.

I really want to just curl up and forget about what it means to be me.

...

I only want to know the memories my mother shared with me and nothing else.

School day ends.

"Have you ever heard of the witch Michelle?"

"But mom I already know what a witch is."

She paused and then resumed to elaborate.

"When I was younger parents used to tell stories of a witch to their kids to scare them."

"Why?"

"We did not have enough food for everyone from where I grew up, so we salvaged what we have."

My eyes widened when I looked at her.

"We were punished if we did not finish everything on our plate..."

...

"For us waste was not an option."

This time Nick picked me up to drive me home. While he was on business with other tenants I was eating my leftovers from when we went out to eat.

When I was almost done I suddenly felt the urge to not eat anymore. I stood up and traveled over to the garbage can before stopping.

Waste is not an option.

I steeled myself before I sat back down with the plate in my hands. I began to shovel food into my mouth and swallowed everything I had to spare. I felt nausea climb into my throat, but I was done. I washed my plate and went back to my room to read.

When I was young I believed princes were only reserved for those who dream. Elegant, beautiful, extravagant, graceful, and enduring. I have never seen any man like that in my life.

For a real man was not processed and void of imperfection. A man is whoever he wants to be; brawn, brutal, passive, or sensitive. They all come in many forms.

I cannot lie when I say I once fawned over a beautiful face. Though any beautiful face can be deceiving and cunning as they are pompous.

I'll never hold a light to such individuals unless their insides prove their kindness and honesty.

My dream is changing every second I spend asleep.

The streets flooded with rain water as it poured.

"Hey princess don'tcha think this is kinda getting old! My uniform is getting all dirty from running away from you", he said as his shoes slapped the road as he ran.

No matter what he pulls, he won't change my mind.

I ran with my pajamas not caring if lighting would hit me. He will not be forgiven.

He dipped into an alleyway as I struggled to save myself from falling.

No!

I bared the weight of the impact with my arms before getting up to catch up to him.

I will catch you.

When I have covered enough distance to keep him in sight he turned around to face me as he jumped through an opening in the brick wall.

"Bye, bye girly." He smirked as he descended into blackness.

I bolted in whether or not if I will feel anything solid on the ground.

I felt myself grip onto his shirt as I fell in.

Before I can even reply he responded.

"Wow kid. Congratulations."

And as he said this I was engulfed by blinding light.

When I woke up I didn't find myself within a bed or anywhere remotely near my home. My eyes were flooded with the sight of grass and newly budding trees.

Where am I?

"Ah, have you perhaps fallen victim to the spring ma'am?", a young man said as he stood near me.

It is strange to find men wearing kimonos nowadays.

I stammered. "N-no sir."

"Ah well. A beautiful young lady like you looks like the type who would spend hours watching nature till the sun sets. My mistake", he said whimsically before walking off.

My eyes shot off in alarm as I called after him. "Wait!"

"Slow down dear. What makes you so antsy to call me back? I'm quite a busy man if I may add." His eyes gleamed playfully as he walked back to where I sat.

I struggled with words. "Ah um..Do you know where this place is?"

He stood there for a few seconds as he smiled. "From what I've heard it's on land, a place near a really good onsen, and home to a really powerful shinobi", he said quickly before turning away again to walk off.

He really likes avoiding the question doesn't he.

"Ah, wait sir! That really doesn't answer my question."

He turned back to look at me. "Of course it does. Now I must be off. I have to go off to my construction job, my break is already at it's limit already. See ya."

"Hey!"

He doesn't bother to look at me be as he speedily paddled off with his sandals.

"I'll talk to you another time girly. Have a nice day." His voice waned the further he walked away.

My outstretched hand faltered as I tried to grasp onto what little information he left me with.

Shinobi?

I was mesmerized by my surroundings as I walked.

My head kept on listing off things as I examined the people around me. Oddly I did not feel any fear as I strolled.

"Shinobi? The ninja?"

The fresh scent of sandal wood filled my nose as I looked into each establishment. "Japanese, feudal era, no industrialization, sanitation would most likely contain old world practices." My mouth murmured as I pensively looked down at my clothes. Intricate patterns of gold and red outlined the scattered marigolds woven into it.

The laughter of kids tinged the old world feeling.

I never thought I would ever experience the change of placement.

I walked into what seems to be a store.

I finally recovered resolve to ask. Whether or not this is a ploy from Aldo. Whether or not my sense of reality has finally broken.

"Hello there. I have an array of herbs and medicine to satisfy anything you desire. Do you need of my assistance young lady?", the old shopkeeper said with a clear English voice.

I haven't even realized it, but a Japanese man during this period of time has no need to speak English, because it has not entered the period where there has been any knowledge of such speakers.

"Yes sir..I want to know what this place is?"

He stopped in thought for a moment before answering. "It's a family owned medicinal shop. From what I remember he made the sign big enough for passerby's. Darn...maybe Daisuke didn't do the sign right...Daisuke!"

In moments a maroon haired boy popped up from the back room.

"What granfather?", the boy inquired.

"You didn't do the sign right", the old man bellowed.

"Of course I did. It's almost covering the entire portion above the the door!"

The old man grumbled before replying," then tell me how come this beautiful young lady can't even tell what this place is?"

My face blushed. I thought the first guy was being sarcastic.

The boy looked at me as he fidgeted in place. With a bright blush on his face he bowed. "Sorry ma'am."

My face scalded in embarrassment as I fought a strong impulse to slap myself.

"No, no it looks fine. Actually I thought it was very pretty. I just wanted to know the name of the place I' m in."

He mulled over my words and turned to an even impossible shade of red. "Th-thankyou. I-I really don't have special skill in writing at all really...Um this is the S-senju v-village...ehehe.I thought..you would have known that from coming here."

I stood still unable to make up a proper response. Now I understand this is the same place from that one show.

"Maybe she just was told something different. Country folk are no good with giving proper names. Please may I ask..Is that what happened by chance young lady?"

Having no other way of saving myself I tried to keep myself from him catching on to me.

"Y-yes a man traveling with a band of people told me this is where I would find medicine for my sick brother."

"Oh I'm quite sorry to hear that. Is it just a bad cold?"

"Yes."

He went back behind his counter and fished out a bag and stuffed it with a few herbs. He waved me over and handed me the bag. "This should do it", the old man said as he smiled.

Fighting my mouth to keep quiet, my lips moved almost as if on instinct.

"Don't I have to pay for this sir?"

"Yes, if it was a crabby customer, but since we are in a time of desperation I wouldn't mind giving it to you free just this once since you came all this way to retrieve it."

I hate lying to this man.

I held it in my hand as I looked at him.

I really wanted to fight my tongue.

"I'm sorry sir I don't have a place to stay. Could allow me to stay for a few days? If that is no trouble to you if I may ask."

He stood in thought before he reached out to clasp my hands.

"You poor thing must be tired. I have an empty guest room on the second floor if you need it. I don't know if it should be good if you made your brother wait, but I guess you...you can stay for a bit", he said with a gentle smile.

I bowed low enough that I had a hard time keeping balance. "Thank you so much."

My room was bare of anything else other than a small writing desk and chair with a futon rolled up on the wall.

The sparse room gave me a sense of emptiness for the few seconds I stared at the room's expanse.

Though it's not so bad.

"Hey ma'am it's time for dinner", Daisuke said as he came from the room,"I guess we are sharing the same floor for a few days."

I sat down in a plain wooden chair while the clatter of pots and pans filled the room. Eventually everyone sat down minus the old man.

A young woman with black hair sat up from her chair and set plates in front of me and Daisuke.

"It's a shame he couldn't join us for dinner", young woman said as she sat back down in here chair.

"He's working himself into the night again."

Daisuke popped up from his chair and tried to grab onto his mother's arm as she reached for her chopsticks. "Mama he's okay. Grandfather is just doing what he does best."

"But what he does best is exhausting him to no end. We may be common folk, but it's not like his herbs are the only thing that's out there. Those Senju guys could just lay off his store every once in a while in the least." She creased her brows as she picked at her food.

Daisuke settled in his seat as we silently ate in peace. Finally the woman's head perked up as she looked at me.

"I'm sorry if I ignored you for a little bit back there. I feel bothered that's all."

I wiped my mouth before straightening my back.

"It's okay ma'am. I don't really mind."

...

"So where you from?", the lady asked.

"Ah I'm from a little village far from here. I don't think you would be interested in it, barely anyone knows about it."

She smiled. "No, no tell me. I hailed from a small village too and came here with my family to aid with the Senju. It's a long story but I think the benefits of coming are paying off."

"It's called the Antelope Valley."

"That's no real name for a village. Is there any real reason behind it?" She leaned into her chair as she looked at me.

"Antelopes used to live there. It's kind of a desert area, though it's surrounded by low rising hills."

I cannot reveal more than I can chew.

"Wow! I have never heard of such a place. Antelopes are creatures? What do they look like?"

"Deers with horns."

Daisuke finally looked up from his food, his mouth filled with rice. "What! Do you know some more stuff like that?", he said as food flew out of his mouth.

Just as I was about to answer a booming voice shattered the warm ambiance.

"What did she say that is getting you so excited Daisuke?", the old man's gruff voice asked.

"Antelopes", Daisuke said as he rocked in his seat.

"Why I have never heard of a fruit making my grandson getting excited over", the old man said with a smile.

"Young lady wherever you got this fruit from please tell me. I am planning to make a visit to an old friend of mine."

"Wait I have never heard you tell me this."

The old man looked at her. "Because I have never told you. Now, now sweet berry don't tell me things I've never did."

"Dad!" the woman fumed.

"What? It's true. Like the time you told me I didn't stock the shelves, but...I in fact did."

"Grrr"

"There's no need to stock shelves at midnight my dear. Or do you have customers that come at night?"

"Dad that's ridiculous."

"My sweet berry don't be shy to tell me that you serve ghost customers." The old man paused to mimic a ghoul.

"Boogah boogah! Aiiiii~"

"Grandpa stop it. Ha. You're making mama mad", Daisuke said while laughing.

"I suppose so...Boogah boogah!"

"Dad! Go sit down."

I could see the veins forming on her head.

"Alright, alright."

A few minutes passed.

"So I see my grandson has taken a liking to you."

The women had already left to retire in her room.

"I guess so."

Daisuke went to retire in the living room.

"Woman pretty as you don't come by often enough."

"Y-you really think I'm pretty?"

"Of course that's all Daisuke says when you're not around."

Of course my mom always says that to me, but this man-

"If I could I would let you stay longer, but my daughter, Kotoka, always yells at me when I have guests overstay their welcome...And I never asked your name have I? No matter, what is your name young lady?"

"Michelle."

"Never heard of it. It sounds pretty. What does it mean?"

"From what I know it is a question." I scratched my cheek as he leaned in his chair.

"Well a question will always have an answer. So go on spit it out." He smiled as he egged me on.

"Who is god?"

"Hmmm. Who is god you say? I guess I'm the god of the herbs..I suppose and Daisuke is the god of his own mind...And Kotoka is the goddess of my affection. Quite a peculiar name." His chair creaked as he sat up from his chair.

"Anyway I have to go off to bed now. An early riser like me can't let himself stay up late like this when we have customers."

He stopped at the doorway as he turned to look at me.

"Goodnight bean root. Hwe that's not a good nickname...See you tomorrow missy", he mused as he walked away.

I guess beans have their roots.

I sat in my futon wondering whether all of this is real.

Hopefully he won't visit me in my dreams tonight.

My eyes grew heavy until sleep took over me.

It rained. It rained heavily on the pavement.

I see no one there. No crowd. Not even Aldo.

"You never seem to get it sweet flower." I heard his voice cooed in my ears.

"Catching me will never suffice."

I wish this guy would stop all of this nonsense.

I wanted to just put on my slicker before I get terribly annoyed.

"You're playing games again." My voice chipped icily through the freezing rain.

"You're never gonna learn." His voice bugs me.

My eyes searched through the watery mess, but I still couldn't see him.

"Growing up is something that comes through you're hardships. That's why this is not the end."

I felt a phantom's nose poking my ear.

"You chose to keep chasing me so I allowed you to catch me."

There was a streak of thunder stretching across the sky.

"An adult who never grows up is still a child without hardship. Eventually you'll have to come to terms with this kiddo."

Shut up.

"You'll never breathe without me. I'm just helping you take another step that's all."

I felt a taller figure hug me from behind.

"Stop fooling yourself my dear Michelle."

I woke up and saw morning light pour through the window. My futon still resting against me as the day before.

I'm not a fool.