I froze. I couldn't run and hide. The bartender was still making the drinks. I glanced over my shoulder for my friends and realised that they were too busy dancing to a song I'd never heard before. They hadn't noticed. I glanced back and realised he was gone. Had I been hallucinating or something? It was my third drink...

'Hey, Lucy.' His voice made me tense and I watched as he moved from behind me to join me at the bar.

The barman placed one drink down in front of me, moving onto the next one and I willed him to work faster. I wasn't cared about how shaken the cocktails were. I wanted to make a break for it. I'd done so well at the Victoria's Secret show, managing not to have a conversation with him backstage or at the party afterwards. And now, out of all of the bars in New York city, he'd decided to come to a hip bar in Brooklyn, not far from Brooklyn Bridge. Seriously?

'How are you?' He asked with a friendly smile. I glanced over his shoulder. Usually he had a girl with him these days. Why didn't he tonight?

'I'm good. You?' I replied, casually. I was hoping it wasn't going to be another repeat of the conversation we'd had in London on the last night of Nathan's tour. I thought of Nathan's twinkling eyes and his adorable smile and it relaxed me. A little.

'Yeah I'm not bad.' He replied with a shrug as the bartender returned with another one of the cocktails. 'Enjoying New York?'

'Yep, it's just as magic as I remember.'

'No Nathan?' He asked with a raised eyebrow.

'No, he's been planning his new album.' A strand fell loose from my bun and I tucked it behind my ear.

'Didn't have the time to come out and support you, huh?'

I looked over at him with narrowed eyes. 'No, we're both busy. You know how it is.'

'I would have made time for you.'

'Yeah and any model ex-girlfriend that came your way.' I responded, bluntly. His eyes widened and then he looked hurt, which just irritated me. He was the one that had cheated, not me. He had no right to look hurt.

'It was a mistake and it wasn't supposed to happen. It hasn't changed how I feel about you. None of it has.' His eyes looked sad and I broke eye contact with him as the bartender returned with the third cocktail. One to go.

'Tried to keep you close to me, but life got in between.' Nathan's voice filled the bar and Ed frowned in response.

'How many times can I apologise? What can I do? Because I'd do anything to make this right.' Ed continued, reaching for my hand but I pulled it away.

'You can't make this right, Ed. You broke me. You hurt me. And now I've moved on and I'm happy.' The bartender returned with the final drink and I passed him the money.

'But I'm your soulfinder.'

'Not anymore you're not.' I replied and he reached for me again.

'What's taking so long?!' Taylor said, appearing behind me with the other girls. 'Oh. Ed.'

'Taylor.' He said, giving her a smile I knew as false. 'How are you?'

'I'm great thanks.' She said, warily. I passed the girls each their drinks and Taylor squeezed my side. 'Come on, Lu, let's hit the dance floor.'

Ed left the bar soon after that and I hoped that soon he would realise that he needed to give up. He'd broken my heart into tiny pieces, he'd broken his promise not to hurt me. And he'd lost his chance at a happily ever after with me. It was over and the sooner he realised that, the better.

The flight to LAX airport was fairly early the next day, so I spent the flight catching up on sleep and sleeping off my headache from the night before. Luckily, by the time I arrived in Los Angeles, I was feeling more alive than I had been before. Eric had flown out the previous day, so it was just Matt and I piling into the car that had been sent for us at the airport. Like an excited child, I watched the buildings and palm trees pass by the windows as we drove along the streets of Los Angeles, city of the Angels.

'Where are we going?' I asked Matt as we headed through a gated residential area. Surely there weren't hotels up there, were there?

'Didn't Eric tell you? He rented a house as it was more cost effective.' Matt replied from the front seat. 'I'm in the guest quarters in the garage so I won't be in the way.'

'And where's Eric staying?' I said, holding my breath.

'A hotel in town.'

I exhaled, relieved I wouldn't be stuck in some stupid house with Eric. 'Thank god.' Matt chuckled in response as we pulled into a small driveway. The gate opened and the driver drove through it, parking the car in front of the building. I climbed out of the car, feeling the humidity straight away. It was already pretty warm, one of California's warmest Aprils in about ten years.

The red wooden house was in Silver Lake Hills, nestled into the hillside. The driver passed me a key, before moving to the trunk to take out my bags. Matt nodded at the door and I walked over to open the main building, which looked nothing like I expected a Los Angeles house to look like. It was cute and not modern at all. The only modern-looking bit was the small detatched garage, which had been converted into a small studio apartment. I turned the keys in the door, unlocking the building, and then I stepped inside. I found myself in a living room with polished wooden floors and a large grey rug. There was a stone fireplace, not that I needed one, and ceiling fans. The furniture consisted of two teal-coloured sofa beds and a flat-screen television attached to the wall. That was when I noticed the large, glass windows with a view. I watched over to them, pulling apart the glass french doors in the middle. There was a beautiful view of the lake from the decking, where there was an outside dining table and barbecue. I walked across the terrace and spotted a small swimming pool at one end, with sunbeds next to it. Then I spotted the Hollywood sign and I smiled. House with a view for sure. Heading back inside, I came across the kitchen-diner. The white counters were covered with black, shiny granite, the only modern part of the house, and there was a small, round, wooden table with four chairs.

Walking back into the reception area, I realised there were white railings over-looking the living room, and then I spotted the ladder-style steps. I climbed it carefully, finding myself in the loft bedroom. There was a large, comfy-looking bed decorated with white covers and teal cushions. There were mirrors lining one of the walls, hiding the walk-in closet. On the other side was a small door leading to an ensuite bathroom. It felt more homely than a hotel and that thought made me smile. It was going to be a nicer place to stay. It was just a shame that my band weren't going to be joining me in California.

After unpacking, I settled down in the living room with a sandwich I'd made using the filled fridge and cupboard. I pulled up my schedule on my laptop, the one Eric had sent over that morning.

Friday 25th April- Flight to LAX Airport, Los Angeles

Saturday 26th April- interview on Jimmy Kimmel

Tuesday 29th April- Photoshoot and interview with Vogue

Wednesday 30th April- UNICEF Charity Ball

Saturday 3rd May- Performance at Disneyland

Monday 5th May- 'Made in the USA' video shoot

Tuesday 5th May- 'Made in the USA' video shoot

The schedule ended with a 'TBC' comment and my eyes widened as I ran back over the events. For one, I had some free time, and for two... Disney? I was performing at Disney? There was an email from Eric, so I opened it, scanning it.

Lucy,

We will have lunch at my hotel tomorrow to discuss the plans for the performance at Disneyland at the end of the week, as we will need to decide the Disney songs you are performing so you can rehearse. I also have some outfits on hold for you to try on for the UNICEF ball, so we will sort that out too.

Eric

I glanced at the clock on the wall. It was still early. Would Nathan be up? I turned on Skype, surprised that he wasn't online on there or Facebook. I sent him a quick picture of the view from my terrace on Whatsapp and then I changed into my bikini, making the most of some relaxing time in the sunshine. Maybe LA wasn't going to be too bad.

An afternoon of sunning myself and swimming in the pool was relaxing and I noticed that night that I had a slight glow to my skin, my freckles starting to make a small reapparance. I ate my dinner on the terrace, watching the sun setting in the sky. I let out a sigh; the view was beautiful. It was just a shame I had no one to share it with. I checked my phone again, surprised that I still hadn't heard anything from Nathan. He was completely awol. Feeling alone in a beautiful city, I had an early night.

The meeting over lunch with Eric didn't last long the next day. He simply gave me a list of the Disney songs I would be covering and that was it;

Kiss the girl- The Little Mermaid

Let it go- Frozen

Tale as old as time- Beauty and the Beast

I see the light- Tangled

I knew three of them, so it wasn't going to be too challenging, but either way, I spent the rest of the afternoon on the terrace, learning the songs over the backing tracks I had been given by whichever band would be performing with me at Disneyland. I was halfway through learning 'Tale as old as time', when the doorbell rang. Was Matt after some company? I didn't blame him if he was. I'd told him he was welcome to hang out in the main house with me and I'd told him he could use the terrace, but he'd said he was quite happy on his small patio area. I pulled my t-shirt back over my head, so that my exposed bikini top was covered and I walked inside to the front door. I opened it cautiously, my eyes widening in surprise.

'Hey princess.' Nathan said with his familiar smile that made every girl's knees weak.

I wrapped my arms tightly around him. 'What are you doing here?!'

'Surprising you.' He said, his arms wrapping around my waist. 'Have you lost weight?'

'I think so.' I replied, giving him back his personal space. The gym sessions and running seemed to have paid off.

'You didn't need to lose weight.' He frowned. 'You have a lovely figure.'

'Not according to my manager.' I glanced over his shoulder at the swanky, black Chrysler Sebring Convertible in the driveway. 'Is that yours?'

'Yeah, it's my rental car.' He grinned. 'Need one to get around LA.'

I spotted the suitcase and bags in the back. 'Where are you staying?'

'Probably my favourite hotel downtown but I'll sort that later.'

'Nonsense, you can stay here.' I smiled. 'It's pretty lonely up here anyway.'

'Are you sure?' He asked, his mouth turning upwards in the corners.

'Of course. Now come on in, I'll give you a tour.'

Nathan loved the view as much as I did and he made himself comfortable, hanging his clothes in the closet beside mine and raiding the pre-packed fridge. I felt bad leaving him behind to go to Jimmy Kimmel, when he'd only been there a few hours, but I went and did the interview and headed straight back afterwards.

'Hey.' I said, walking back through the door. I tossed him the spare pair of keys I'd managed to have Eric pick up from the letting agent. 'Here, these are yours.'

'Thanks.' He smiled, stretching out on the sofa. I sat down beside him and he pulled me onto his lap, wrapping his arms around my waist. 'Great interview by the way.'

I blushed and bit my lip. 'You watched it?'

'Of course I did.' He smiled, kissing my cheek. I turned to face him and he kissed my lips gently, smiling against them. 'Mmm I missed you.'

'I missed you too.' I said, returning the smile. He reached out, tucking my hair behind my ear in an affectionate gesture. 'So you've not told me your plans for this week.'

'Well,' he said, his hand returning to my waist, 'I've got a princess to take to a ball on Wednesday, haven't I?' His eyes twinkled as they looked at mine.

'How did you know?'

'I got an invite too.' He grinned. 'I just wanted to surprise you. What's your schedule like? I might get some recording done for the album whilst you're busy.'

'I'm working Tuesday, but then it's the ball and then at Saturday I'm performing at Disneyland.' A lightbulb went on in my head. 'Oh my goodness, you have to come! I'm performing at 10.30am in the morning to start their Star Wars weekend but I've got a pass for the whole weekend and I'm staying up there too in their Grand Californian Hotel.'

'I'll be there.' He kissed my cheek. 'Seeing as how Disney is our thing. What have you got to perform?'

I reeled off the songs, pausing for the last one. 'I have to sing 'I see the light.' Hey... you should totally sing it with me. It's supposed to be a duet anyway.'

'Think they'll mind?'

I thought of the fans that were loving Lathan, even if they weren't sure if we were actually an item or not. 'I don't think they'll mind at all.'

When I woke up the following day, Nathan was in the kitchen, making sandwiches and packing them into a picnic basket. I raised an eyebrow as I stood, silently watching him for a moment. The room was boiling and I'd woken up because I was so hot. I turned on the fan, glad to let some cool air in.

'Hey.' My boyfriend smiled, looking at me stood in the doorway. 'It's really hot today.'

'Are California having a heatwave or something?'

'First heatwave in twelve years apparently.' He replied, wrapping tin foil around the sandwiches and putting them into the picnic basket. 'I thought it would be perfect weather for a day at the beach.'

'I have this awful feeling that the rest of Los Angeles might agree with you. I'd love to see Venice Beach, but it's going to be crazy busy and I can't wear sunglasses the whole time because I'll look like a panda.'

'You'd be a cute panda.' He walked over and pressed his lips to my forehead. 'But don't worry, we aren't going to Venice.'

'Then where are we going?'

The drive took an hour and I was thankful for being in a convertible as the breeze was refreshing. Nathan's concentration face was cute as he sped down the highway and I couldn't help but glance at his arm muscles, obvious in the blue v-neck t-shirt he was wearing with his chino-style navy shorts. I'd opted for a navy strappy lace dress, thrown on over the top of my light pink ruffle Seafolly bikini set. Soon, we entered an area called the Crystal Cove State Park and Nathan turned down a dirt-track into an almost-empty car park. There was a tiny cafe, where two people were buying an ice-cream, and he pulled up outside it, parking the car.

'It's boiling hot and this place is empty. What gives?' I asked, surprised. I looked around and realised we were stood on top of a cliff. Looking into the distance on the left, I could see the highway bending towards the sparkling blue ocean.

'I came across this once by accident.' Nathan grinned. 'It's a secret beach.'

'I raised an eyebrow. 'By accident?'

'I had songwriter's block and I wanted to be inspired so I drove down towards Laguna and then I spotted the cafe at the end of the track and there you have it. I found Treasure Cove.' He grabbed the picnic basket, his rucsac and a bodyboard, throwing the bag over his shoulder and tucking the bodyboard under his arm. I reached for my beach bag too and he locked the car, before leading the way down the beaten footpath. We walked down some steps built into the cliff face and I froze. Down below us was a golden sandy beach, where blue waves gently lapped against the sand. There were three families scattered around the beach, but other than that it was empty. The cove was closed off by large rocks either side of it, making it the perfect place to relax. Nathan walked us across the sand to the other side of the cove, away from the families, and he laid out the beach towels on the sand.

'So what do you think?' He asked me, pulling his t-shirt off and revealing his toned chest. I wanted to make a comment of what I thought of his chest but I decided it would be completely inappropriate.

'It's perfect.' I replied, referring to the beach, but also to his chest. Maybe. I nervously pulled my dress over my head, revealing the bikini I had treated myself to in New York. I caught Nathan watching me and I blushed, lying myself down on the towel so that I could enjoy the view of the ocean.

We spent the day sunbathing, chatting, trying to build sandsculptures and swimming in the sea, with Nathan even trying to teach me to bodyboard. It was perfect.

'Thanks for a great day.' I said to Nathan as we walked up to the car as the sun disappeared on the horizon. I pulled my jumper around myself, surprised that the air could be so cool after such a hot day. A breeze came and I laughed as my hair covered my face, giving off my best Cousin IT impression. Nathan smiled, pulling me close and pushing the hair out of my face. He closed the gap between our lips, pressing his gently against mine, sending electricity flowing through my body. It was a perfect kiss and it made my knees weak. Then he pulled back from the kiss, resting his forehead against mine.

'You're welcome.'

Monday was spent checking out the sights in Hollywood, from the Hollywood sign to the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Nathan had even joked that one day we might even make it there. Tuesday I had my photoshoot and interview with Vogue, which went well, and then it was Wednesday, the day of the UNICEF ball. I'd spent the morning rehearsing for Disneyland at a recording studio space downtown, with the band who had been playing at Disney for years, apparently, often playing in the parades. Then, that afternoon, I was sent off to a beauty salon to get ready for the ball.

'So is this your first time in LA?' The beautician, Sally, asked as she threaded my eyebrows. I felt glad that the waxing of my legs was over and moisturiser had been rubbed onto them, cooling them down.

'Yeah it is.' I replied, trying not to wince as I knew that would lead to half of my eyebrow coming off.

'And do you like it?'

'It's lovely.' I smiled. 'The weather has been great too.'

'It's usually not this nice for April.' Sally laughed. 'But hey, means you don't need a fake tan for today, right?' She was right. My skin was sunkissed and glowing, my freckles standing out on my face thanks to the time I'd been spending in the sun. 'Right, your eyebrows are all done. I'll do your nails next and then we'll sort out your make-up.' She glanced over at the clock. 'Your car is coming at six, right?'

'Yep.' I smiled.

'Phew. We've got plenty of time.' Sally gave me a manicure with a pale pink base and glitter against the cuticles. Then she moved onto my make-up, giving my eyes a silvery make-over with different shades of silver, winged eyeliner and thickening mascara. My lips were kept natural with a colour only one shade brighter than my natural colour and the foundation and blusher made my cheek bones more prominent. My hair too, was left natural, falling in loose curls, my fringe framing my face perfectly. 'Right, we have fifteen minutes. If you get changed then I can check I haven't missed anything.' Sally told me.

I grabbed my dress bag, slipping into the spacious ladies bathroom. I unzipped the dress bag and smiled. I'd tried on a load of dresses but Eric had had the final say. And, thankfully, he had chosen my favourite. The dress was by a designer called Jovani and it was a very light blue dress, one which reminded me of Cinderella. The dress was strapless with a beaded bodice which covered my bust and then showed my middriff and back underneath the beading because of the sheer detailing. At the waist, the dress fell outwards in a long, flowy skirt. It was a dress fit for a princess and I felt like one in it. I zipped the side up carefully and slipped my feet into the silver heels with the bow detail on the front. Then I grabbed the silver clutchbag, placing my phone, keys and purse into it. I looked at myself in the full-length mirror and smiled, pleased with my appearance. I felt like a million dollars. I placed my original clothes in the dress bag, ready for them to be sent back to the house and I stepped out of the bathroom.

Sally and her two colleagues stood together, applauding and squealing with excitement. 'You look fabulous!' Sally cooed.

'Just like Cinderella!' Rhea added.

Sally walked over to me, quickly spraying some more product in my hair and checking my make-up. 'Yep, perfect. Definitely my favourite client yet.' She snapped a few photos for the website and Facebook, promising not to release them until later that night.

The bell on the door chimed as it opened and I looked up to see Nathan stood in a navy, well-fitted suit, a white shirt and a tie the same colour as my dress. His jaw dropped and then he smiled at me, his eyes twinkling. 'Wow Lucy, you look so beautiful.'

The salon girls sighed as they looked at him and I blushed, fiddling with my clutch bag. 'Thank you.'

'Shall we go?' He said, leaning against the doorway as he often did. I glanced over at the beauticians and realised they looked like they were going to faint from swooning.

'Thanks so much girls.' I said with a smile to them and they nodded, still looking at Nathan. I reached him, tapping him on the shoulder. 'Come on, let's go.'

My insides buzzed with excitement as the driver drove us towards Beverly Hills. Nathan reached out for my hand, interlocking my fingers with his. 'You really are a princess tonight.' He whispered, his eyes meeting mine. 'My princess.'

I smiled, colour rising to my cheeks. 'And you make a pretty good prince charming.' He squeezed my hand. 'The press are going to have a field day when they see us turning up together.'

'I think you're right about that.' He grinned. He lifted my hand to his lips, kissing it softly as the car slowed down.

'We're here.' The driver announced, coming to a stop. 'There's just two cars in front.'

'Are you ready princess?' Nathan asked, rubbing the back of my hand with his thumb. I nodded, mutely, a smile playing on my lips and the familar nerves of the red carpet sinking in. The car moved forward and the driver got out, moving round to open Nathan's door. Cameras flashed and crowds cheered as Nathan carefully got out. He turned back towards the car, holding his hand out for me and I got out of the car slowly, holding my beautiful dress, only releasing it when I was stood on the red carpet.

Nathan moved his hand to the small of my back, guiding me up the red carpet. We reached the press and we posed for a few pictures together, casually.

'Nathan, are you planning a tour of America now that you've finished in Europe?' A reporter asked as we posed for a few pictures, individually.

'I'd like to but at the moment I'm getting my new album ready. Maybe when the new album comes out.' My boyfriend replied with his signature smile.

'And will Lucy be joining you as your support act again?'

'Well that would be great but I think Lucy is ready to headline, don't you?' He grinned at me and I blushed.

'So are you two actually an item?' The question caught me by surprise and I wasn't sure what to say or how to act. We should have discussed this. It was bound to come up in conversation, especially with the prying press.

Nathan's eyes met mine and he smiled again. 'As a matter of fact, yes. Yes we are.' His hand reached out for mine and he pulled me towards him. 'Aren't I lucky, huh?'

The camera flashes went off and more questions were thrown our way, this time about our relationship.

'How long have you been together?'

'How did you meet?'

'Why have you kept it a secret for this long?'

Nathan chuckled, resting his forehead against mine, his smile meeting his beautiful eyes.

We didn't stay on the red carpet too long, much to the disappointment of the press. Instead, we headed inside, where I stood gawping at the spectacular ballroom in front of me. It reminded me of the ballroom from Beauty and the Beast, only with round tables scattered around, buffet tables and a stage, where the acts would be performing that evening. Nathan grabbed two glasses of champagne from a passing waitor, handing one to me.

'I hope you didn't mind that little announcement.' He said to me as we walked through the mingling crowds, towards the table we were going to be seated at for the evening.

'Of course not.' I replied with a small smile. 'I thought you didn't want the press to know.'

'Maybe I changed my mind and want to show you off to the world.' He smiled, kissing my forehead.

The ball started with a buffet dinner, where everyone ate happily, whilst chatting to the other people on their table. We found ourselves with Selena, which was good as she was a familiar face, Nick Jonas and their dates for the evening, who I didn't know. Then the live music started and I almost squealed when Michael Buble walked onto the stage. I'd seen him once, at the o2 arena with my mum, but we'd had a rubbish view because we'd got the last two seats, which were right up in the heavens.

He opened the evening with 'Save the last dance for me' and people moved to the floor straight away, dancing Salsa-like routines, whilst others headed to the bar. I sipped at my champagne, tapping my fingers in time to the rhythm on the table. I knew salsa wasn't for me. I'd been to a class once before with Willow, just for a giggle, and I'd been an absolute disaster. Selena and her date slipped away, leaving me alone with my date.

I glanced over at him and realised he was watching me. 'Don't tell me I've got cheesecake round my face or something?' I asked, my eyes wide.

'No.' He laughed, kissing my forehead. 'I just like looking at you.'

I raised an eyebrow. 'Why?'

'Because you're beautiful and I'm very lucky to have you.'

'I still think you need to go to Specsavers.'

'I still think you do.' He laughed, his fingers interlocking with mine. 'I'm surprised you're not stood at the front of the stage! Don't you love a bit of Mr Buble?'

'I don't think standing at the front of the stage, cheering is socially acceptable at these kind of things.' I replied with a playful smile. 'Needless to say that my mum would do that anyway.'

'Oh baby won't you save the last dance for me

Oh baby won't you promise that you'll save,

The last dance for me

Save the last dance, the very last dance for me.'

The song finished and we applauded as Michael Buble took a sip from his bottle of water. A familiar piano intro started up and Nathan held out his hand. 'May I have this dance, princess?' I laughed, accepting his invitation as he led me to the floor.

'I can hear her heart beat for a thousand miles

And the heavens open every time she smiles.'

He took one of my hands in his, placing his other hand on the small of my back as I placed my other hand on his shoulder.

'And when I come to her, that's where I belong

I'm running to her like a river's song

She gives me love, love, love, love, crazy love

She gives me love, love, love, love, crazy love.'

We swayed in time to the music, Nathan's eyes locked on mine.

'She's got a fine sense of humor when I'm feeling low down

And when I come to her when the sun goes down

Takes away my trouble, takes away my grief

Takes away my heartache in the night like a thief.

Give me love, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme crazy love

Give me love, love, love, yes sir, crazy love.'

He gently twirled me around in the instrumental, dancing with me hands on my waist, my back against his chest.

'Yes, I need her in the daytime

Yes, I need her in the night

But I want to throw my arms around her

Kiss her an' hug her, kiss her an' hug her tight

Kiss her an' hug her tight, through the night.'

He turned me back to face him and planted a kiss on my forehead. I looked up at him, and his eyes met mine, twinkling as he smiled.

'And when I'm returning from so far away

She gives me some sweet lovin' brighten up my day

It'll make me feel righteous, make me feel whole

Make me feel mellow down into my soul.'

We danced quicker this time to the music as the beat kicked back in.

'Give me love, gimme love, yes sir, crazy love

Give me love, gimme, gimme, gimme, crazy love.'

Nathan lifted me as we spun and I laughed as he did it. Were we in Strictly Come Dancing now or something?

'I said she gives me love, love, love, aww, crazy love

She gives me, yeah, crazy love

I said give me love, love, love, love, crazy love

She gives me love, love, yes sir, a crazy love, one more time

She gives me love, love, love, love, she gives me crazy love

She gives me love, love, love, yes sir crazy love.'

The song ended and Nathan's lips crashed against mine, in a kiss filled with emotion. He pulled back, pressing his forehead against mine as the guests applauded Mr Buble.

'I've always wondered if you take dance lessons.' I said, playfully as the intro of the next song started up.

'You have to learn to dance in theatre school.' He explained. 'Even if you just want to do the music, you still have to learn to dance. It comes in handy though, huh?' He grinned.

'Oh absolutely.' I laughed as he started to move us in time to the music, once again.

The atmosphere changed later on, when Swedish House Mafia changed the music over to a DJ slot, playing funky music that had everyone dancing and grinding and anything else you expected in a club, which looked a little weird when everyone was dressed in Black Tie fashion.

The ball ended around 1am and we headed back to the house merry from champagne. I kicked off my shoes straight away, my feet feeling sore, and Nathan disappeared into the kitchen to make us each a cup of tea, something I still had without fail when going to bed. I sat on one of the sunbeds, looking up at the Hollywood sign, still glowing in the light. The stars shone overhead, and I could see Orion's belt clearly, as I was far enough away from the city lights.

Nathan walked out onto the decking, also having ditched his shoes and jacket. He placed the cups of tea on the glass side table and looked at the pool. 'Nice place you've got here.'

I laughed. 'Sure is. Maybe when I've got enough cash I'll buy myself an apartment with a pool somewhere hot. Then I can go on holiday whenever I want.'

'Yeah, it's a pretty sweet feeling.'

I looked over at him with curiosity. 'You have a holiday home? Where?'

'I've got a place near Barcelona.' He replied, casually. 'It's a great city, I'd love to take you there sometime.'

I smiled at that. 'Let me guess, a villa by the sea with a swimming pool and some epic pool parties?'

'The odd one sure.' He grinned. 'Though there's something I've always wanted to do, but I never have.'

'Oh?' He scooped me up into his arms and walked towards the pool. 'Oh, no, no, no!' I squealed as he held me over it. Then he did what I thought he was going to do; he threw me into the cool water, in my beautiful formal dress. He jumped in beside me as I smoothed my wet fringe out of my eyes.

'I've always wanted to wear something fancy and jump into a pool.' He grinned from beside me, completely drenched in the neck-deep water.

'You are completely insane!' I told him, splashing him and he splashed me back. 'Ugh, I bet my make-up is currently running down my cheeks. Not attractive.'

He walked over to me, cupping my face with his hands. 'Even soaking wet, you're beautiful.' He whispered before pressing his lips gently against mine. The kiss deepened and I wrapped my arms around his neck as his lips moved against mine. He grabbed my thighs, lifting me so that my legs were wrapped around his waist as I kissed him, soaking wet in a beautiful ballgown. It was the kind of moment Nicholas Sparks would write about and, despite the cold, it was perfect.

The next day, magazines and the worldwide web were buzzing with excitement that 'Lathan' was official and it had even been made Facebook official too. My mum had sent me a text telling me she was happy for me but to be careful. Everyone else seemed to be loving 'Lathan' and there were pictures of us outside the ball and then dancing together inside which just made my heart melt. We were a cute couple, there was no escaping it.

On Friday evening, we packed our weekend bags and cases into Nathan's rental car and headed off to Anaheim, to Disneyland. The journey took just under an hour, which was pretty good going considering we were travelling through rush hour and the heatwave had stopped, so it wasn't too hot in the car. Nathan parked his car in the car park when we arrived at Disney's Grand Californian Hotel and Spa, and we took our bags to reception to check-in.

'Hello Miss May and Mr Jones. What a pleasure!' The receptionist smiled, a huge Disney smile. He typed in our details into the computer system and grabbed our keys. 'Now your room is on the sixth floor and you are staying in one of our Premium View rooms with a wonderful view.' He grabbed an envelope marked with my name on it. 'This has a park map, your VIP wristbands and your meal plan card in it to allow you all inclusive access to food in the hotel and in the park and you've been requested for soundcheck in the park at 8am tomorrow before the park opens to guests.'

'Okay, great.' I smiled, tucking the envelope in my bag.

'If there's anything you need at all, just ring the lobby and we can sort anything for you.'

'Great, thank you.' Nathan nodded.

'Not a problem. I hope you enjoy your stay.'

We took the elevator to the sixth floor, turning down the offer of a bell-hop service. Our room was tucked away, right down the end of the corridor. Room 609. I opened it with the keycard and we stepped inside, closing the door behind us. The room was pretty spacious with a king-sized bed, brown sofa, table and chairs, flatscreen television, dressing table and a balcony, which overlooked the pool and the Hollywood tower. After unpacking, we grabbed dinner downstairs and then turned in for an early night, watching Tangled on the flatscreen as we fell asleep.

My alarm sounded at 6.30am the following morning and I groaned as I got out of bed, making my way to the bathroom. I showered and plaited my hair to the side. Then I threw on my sweatpants and a tank top, as Nathan had done, and we headed down to breakfast. By 7.30am, we had eaten and we had changed into our outfits for the day. I stepped out of the bathroom and laughed when I saw Nathan in khaki chinos, a white shirt with rolled-up sleeves, boots and a dark green waistcoat, with a satchel over his shoulder.

'You look just like Flynn Rider!' I laughed and he grinned.

'Wasn't that the idea, Rapunzel?' He gave me his best 'smoulder' impression, which was surprisingly good. I was wearing a lilac shirt dress with ruffle front and a bow around the waist, with lace cream brogues on my feet and flowers tucked into my braided hair. We'd decided we'd join the Disneybounding craze, dressing up as Disney characters. 'You look beautiful by the way.' Nathan added with a crooked smile. I blushed and he walked over to me, kissing me softly on the lips. 'Come on, we'd better go. The car is probably downstairs waiting for us.'

We got to Disneyland just before eight and it was weird just how empty the park was. There were people walking in, ready to start their day of work, but that was it. The rest of the park was just scarily empty. Nathan held my hand as we followed the 'cast member' up Main Street to the stage, which was just in front of Cinderella's castle. 'May the Fourth Be With You' was written on a banner across the back of the stage, making it clear that they were celebrating the Star Wars weekend.

'What the heck are you wearing?' Eric frowned as we reached the stage.

'Sweet disneybounding.' A castmember commented as he passed us.

'Disneybounding? What the hell is disneybounding?'

'An outfit inspired by a certain disney character, without breaking the Disneyland rules by actually dressing up in a costume.' Nathan explained with a sarcastic grin, which Eric didn't seem to notice.

'I thought you were going to wear one of those new tight-fitting dresses I sent over.' Eric said, glaring at me.

'I'm at Disneyland! Not a burlesque show!' I said, returning the frown. 'In case you forgot Eric, there are going to be kids here.'

'You're going to ruin your image.'

'Oh please, it's Disneyland. If anything, I'll be widening my fanbase to cute, small children and their parents.' I sighed. Eric, looking frustrated, walked off and Nathan squeezed my hand.

'Ignore him. Don't let him ruin your day. I think you look beautiful.' He shot me his best Flynn Rider smoulder and I giggled.

'Right Lucy, we're ready for your soundcheck.' A stage manager called out, giving me a thumbs up. I nodded and followed him up onto the stage.

After soundcheck, Nathan and I had half an hour until the gates opened for guests, so we wandered around, posing for pictures whilst a castmember snapped away on my phone and a professional camera. We posed in character at first and then we moved onto some cute, fun, couple photos, Nathan twirling me in front of Cinderella's castle, him giving me a piggyback, and even just a cute one of his arms around my waist as he kissed my forehead. Then we headed backstage with a bottle of water, hiding from the guests as the gates opened.

'Showtime in five.' The stage manager told me after the microphone had been tested one last time. 'The Circle of Life' was playing in the background and you could hear the loud voices of guests gathering in front of the stage.

'Very good turnout.' The guitarist told me with a nod, after coming off of the stage. 'It's completely packed.'

I had butterflies in my chest and Nathan looked over at me, squeezing my hand. 'We've done arena shows with 20,000 people in it. You're going to be great.'

'I think I'd be less worried if they were my songs.' I replied, my eyes meeting his. 'These are very famous songs and they're pretty hard to cover. I hope everyone likes them.'

'They will.' He smiled.

A sound tech guy came over with my ear piece and mic pack. 'Sorry to interrupt but we've got two minutes to go.' He set me up and I took a deep breath, having a sip of water. My band for the day walked onstage, along with the castmember who was introducing me.

'Hello Disneyland California!' The castmember called out, her voice a southern twang. 'Welcome to our Star Wars weekend of celebrations.' The crowd, young and old, cheered. 'We have some great events planned this weekend including live performances, our Star Wars parade and of course our spectacular firework celebration. Now to kick off the weekend, we have a very special guest here ready to perform some Disney classics for you. Girls and boys, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage Lucy May!'

The crowd cheered and Nathan gave me a thumbs up as I walked onto the stage, taking my place in the middle where my mic stand stood. The castmember gave me a thumbs up and walked off the stage.

'Hey California, you're looking magical today!' I said, hiding my nervousness behind a smile. I was getting good at doing that. I looked out at the crowd, stretching back into Main Street. There were kids on their parent's shoulders, some dressed as Disney princesses and other characters. 'I hope you don't mind but I thought I'd try out a bit of Disneybounding myself today.' I smiled, signalling to my dress and a few people cheered and called out 'Rapunzel.' 'If you know any of the words, please sing along.' I encouraged as the video camera in front of me zoomed in. I nodded to my band and they started the introduction to my first song.

'There you see her

Sitting there across the way

She don't got a lot to say

But there's something about her

And you don't know why

But you're dying to try

You wanna kiss the girl.'

The performance moved by quickly and the crowd sang along and clapped in time to the music. In 'Tale as Old as Time', children watched in awe as Belle and the Beast joined me onstage, dancing behind me as I sang. Then, my rocked-up version of 'Let it Go' went pretty well too, with fireworks going off from the castle everytime I sang 'let it go'. And then it was time for my performance with Nathan, which they knew nothing about.

The song started as normal and I took my microphone, walking across the stage with it as I sang.

'All those days watching from the windows

All those years outside looking in

All that time never even knowing

Just how blind I've been

Now I'm here blinking in the starlight

Now I'm here suddenly I see

Standing here it's all so clear

I'm where I'm meant to be

And at last I see the light

And it's like the fog has lifted

And at last I see the light

And it's like the sky is new

And it's warm and real and bright

And the world has somehow shifted

All at once everything looks different

Now that I see you.'

'All those days chasing down a daydream.' Nathan walked onto the stage and the crowd screamed, making me smile. 'All those years living in a blur

All that time never truly seeing

Things, the way they were

Now she's here shining in the starlight

Now she's here suddenly I know

If she's here it's crystal clear

I'm where I'm meant to go.'

We met in the middle of the stage, singing together. 'And at last I see the light.'

Nathan took my hand in his. 'And it's like the fog has lifted.'

We smiled at each other, our eyes locked on each other. 'And at last I see the light.'

'And it's like the sky is new.' His smile gave me butterflies as I sang.

'And it's warm and real and bright

And the world has somehow shifted

All at once everything is different

Now that I see you

Now that I see you.'

We finished the song and the crowd cheered wildly. I smiled. 'Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, give it up for Mr Nathan Jones.' They cheered and Nathan took a bow.

'And give it up for Miss Lucy May.' He grinned and I curtsied.

'Thank you so much for singing along and I hope you have a fantastic time at Disneyland.' I said into the microphone. The crowd cheered again and we made our way into the wings.

I laughed as Darth Vadar and the Storm Troopers passed us, dancing onto the stage to 'Can't touch this'. I pulled out my earpiece and untaped my mic pack, handing it back over to the sound tech guys.

'See you were great.' Nathan told me, pulling me towards him and pressing a kiss to my forehead.

'Right, I'm outta here.' Eric announced, not that anyone cared. I waved at him and he disappeared, leaving me with Nathan and Matt, who was watching cautiously from a distance.

'So... we're in Disneyland. Let's head on out.' Nathan smiled, squeezing my hand.

Matt kept close by us as we moved through the crowds, stopping to take a few pictures with kids that wanted us to do, and a few teenagers who wanted photos with my very good-looking boyfriend. We spent the day going on all of the rides, from Splash Mountain to the Mad Tea Party, only stopping for a quick lunch. We decided to beat the crowds with an early dinner so we headed to Blue Bayou, a restaurant in the Pirates of the Caribbean ride.

The room was dark with lanterns hanging across the ceiling. It was a pretty romantic setting, considering that it was in Disneyland. We were led to our seat and I was suddenly glad I'd packed a cardigan in my bag as it was pretty cool. I slipped my arms into my cardigan after ordering and then I took a sip of my beer.

'Are you having a good day?' Nathan asked, his face hopeful.

'It's been wonderful.' I replied with a smile.

'Good.' He reached into his satchel and pulled out a box. He pushed it into the middle of the table, a nervous expression on his face. 'I got you a present.'

'You have to stop buying me presents!' I laughed.

'It's nice having someone to treat.' He shrugged with a small smile.

I reached for the box and opened it carefully. Inside were two bracelets made of brown leather. One read 'To infinity' and had a Minnie Mouse symbol, the other read 'and beyond' and had a Mickey Mouse symbol. 'They're so sweet.' I smiled. I put out the Mickey Mouse one, carefully fastening it around Nathan's wrist. He did the same with me, but with the Minnie Mouse one. 'Aren't you a soppy romantic?' I teased with a playful grin and he smiled back.

'Do you like it?'

'Of course I do.' I smiled, interlocking my fingers with him to show I appreciated the gesture.

We watched the fireworks that night and then left the park, heading back to our hotel where we watched a late night viewing of Beauty and the Beast on the 5th floor patio, wrapped in blankets and drinking beer. It was a wonderful end to a wonderful day. The following day was spent at the California Adventure Park, riding the thrillseeker rides and meeting any characters we hadn't managed to pose for photos with the previous day. Then we headed back to our hotel, grabbing our belongings and we drove back to my house in Silver Lake.

It was irritating waking up at 8am the next day, but I reminded myself that I would be filming the video for 'Made in the USA.' I didn't know much about the video, but what I did know was that there were two fairly well-known American actors in it, acting as the couple, which saved me having to be all soppy and romantic with someone like Tyger again. It still made me shudder when I watched the Heart Attack music video. I slipped into my denim shorts and a baggy t-shirt, grabbed my bag, and headed out, making sure not to wake my sleeping boyfriend. I wasn't sure why they needed me the whole day. I spent the day just sat around, watching the male actor (who I recognised from 90210) and the actress being soppy and romantic towards each other, whilst I twiddled my thumbs and had a go at writing a few songs in my songbook. I wasn't needed, so it seemed, until the sun had gone down that evening, when we changed location for the third time.

When we got to the carnival we were filming at, I was ushered straight into hair and make-up, my curls being straightened and smokey-eyed make-up being applied to my face. Then I was sent to wardrobe, where I changed into brown cowboy boots, denim shorts which only just covered my bum and a white, lace crop top. Bracelets were piled up on my wrist and then I was sent out into the carnival, feeling a little cold and underdressed now that the sun had left the sky in darkness. The carnival around me was lit my stage-lights, which would be kept out of camera shot, and then the light bulbs stringed across the carnival, between the tents.

'Okay Lucy, our first shot is just going to be you walking into the carnival, alright?' The director called, making Eric look up from his phone.

'Okay.' I replied. Easy enough. Just a shame that I'd wasted a day sat around not doing anything when I could have been hanging out with my boyfriend.

'And action!'

I walked into the carnival, looking around, as I'd been instructed to do.

'Cut! Nice work!'

Nice work? I'd just stood there really. It had been easy.

'Okay, now we want you to sing the first verse as you're walking in exploring the carnival.' The director instructed. I nodded. 'Okay, action.'

'Our love runs deep like a Chevy

If you fall I'll fall with you baby

'Cause that's the way we like to do it

That's the way we like

You run around open doors like a gentleman

And tell me, "Girl, every day you're my everything."

'Cause that's the way you like to do it

That's the way you like.'

'Great and cut! This is going to be easy!'

The rest of the videoshoot when just like that, moving from myself to the actors, all of us being given simple instructions to follow. It was so simple that it almost felt boring. I just hope the director knew what he was doing. At least I'd gotten to play my guitar in it. That had been pretty sweet. It wasn't a wrap until 3am, and I was only still awake because of the crazy amount of coffee pumping through my veins.

'Nice work.' The director said to me, shaking my hand. 'We don't really need you at the shoot tomorrow for the last few bits. It's really just the actors so you can have the day off.'

'Okay.' I yawned, feeling relieved. I was pretty sure I wasn't going to get out of bed until lunchtime at least.

The car dropped me home and I snuck into the house quietly, trying not to disturb Nathan. I was surprised to see that he was still up, strumming on his guitar.

'You're still up!' I exclaimed, surprised, as I walked into the living room. I glanced over at the clock, which read almost 4am.

He looked over at me with a lopsided smile. 'As are you.'

'I had no idea I was going to be there almost twenty four hours and I wasn't even filming until sunset.' I groaned, placing my bag down on the side.

'Are you tired?' He asked, putting his guitar down and standing up.

'Not really. I've had too much coffee.'

'Good, because there's something I want to show you.'

As we drove up Mullholland Highway, I suddenly became aware of where we were going. The Hollywood sign stood on the hill behind us as Nathan parked the car, the roof coming back over the top of it. We both got out and he locked it as I threw on my baggy jumper over my leggings and t-shirt outfit combo. Even at night, the Hollywood sign looked lovely.

'It's just so cool.' I smiled as his fingers wrapped around mine.

'That's not the best bit.' He replied. 'Mind a little walk?'

'Not at all.'

We walked along the dirt track carefully, following the light of the torch Nathan had thankfully brought with him. It was fairly steep and it twisted around the corner. Then he stopped and I saw why. From where we were, high up in Hollywood, you could see not only the Hollywood sign but, if you turned around, Los Angeles was visible in front of the glowing horizon, where the sun was ready to rise. The buildings rose up, skyscrapers into the sky, and they were lit in the disappearing darkness. Nathan laid out a blanket and we sat on it, protecting our clothes from the dusty ground. He wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me closer and I rested my head on his shoulder.

'It's so pretty.' I whispered, in awe of the incredible view.

'It is.' He whispered back as the sun started to emerge, causing the sky to turn into a slightly orangey colour.

I moved my head so that I was looking at him and he smiled in the early morning light. I leant towards him, gently kissing his lips and he smiled into the kiss, cupping my face and making the kiss more passionate. He moved his lips urgently against mine and then slipped his tongue into my mouth, his tongue almost dancing slowly with mine. I moved so that I was straddling his lap, still kissing him and he pulled back slowly, breathless. He rested his forehead against mine as he let out a deep sigh.

'Are you okay?' I asked him.

'I'm better than okay.' He replied, with a smile, pushing my hair out of my face. He kissed my nose gently as his thumb caressed my cheek in an affectionate gesture. He looked like he was about to say something else, but he stopped himself. I climbed off of his lap, turning back around to look at the sunrise. It was so beautiful. I pulled my phone out of my pocket, snapping a quick picture of it. Then I turned back to Nathan, who was watching me intently.

'What?' I asked with a grin and he smiled, kissing my forehead.

'Nothing.'

We didn't wake up until the afternoon the following day and I spent my time lounging by the pool, checking up on social media and uploading my photos from LA so far, whilst Nathan sat trying to finish a song for his new album. I quickly checked my e-mails, unsurprised that I had e-mails from Leanne and Willow.

Cuz,

Could you have warned me before going public with your relationship with Nathan Jones?! All the women at work are quizzing me about him and suddenly I've become crazy popular which is freaking me out a little. Apparently they're more Team Nate than Team Ed, not that it bothers you of course, but hey, your taste in men has improved, right? My manager wants an exclusive on the Lathan relationship just to warn you, but I've told him I can't get involved. Anyhow, when am I meeting him and checking he's good enough for you?

Missing you and hope you're enjoying Hollywood,

Willz

P.S That dress from the UNICEF ball was fabulous. I must borrow it sometime, if I ever go anywhere fancy enough.

I laughed and quickly typed her a reply before opening my email from my other best friend, Leanne.

OMG FACEBOOK OFFICIAL! AND MEDIA OFFICIAL?! All the magazines have you on the cover, even Hello Magazine (but don't worry, all the pictures they've used have been nice ones). There's even some articles about Ed being jealous because he keeps rolling out from nightclubs with girls on his arm, but hey, if that's his way of coping then whatever. Shouldn't have fucked with your mind in the first place, right? But seriously, you two are really cute, just take things slow because I don't want to be picking up tiny pieces of your heart again. That was awful. When are you home? We must have a girl's night!

Love you,

Leanne

I replied to her and re-opened the Facebook window, where friends requests from unknown people were coming in and my photos had finally uploaded. I looked at the ones of Nathan and I at Disneyland and smiled. They were very cute. But then all of the photos of us from Hollywood were. I changed my picture to one of us dancing together at the Ball, deciding that was my favourite as I liked the way he was looking at me.

'Aha! I've finally finished it!' Nathan called out, triumphantly.

'Well done.' I smiled at him. 'I wish I could finish the one I've been trying to write for the last month and a half. I think it would be pretty good too.' I sighed in frustration, closing my laptop.

'Can I have a look?'

'Sure.' I grabbed my guitar and songbook from the outside table and sat down beside him. 'This is what I have so far.'

I strummed the introduction before making a start.

'I'd like to say we gave it a try

I'd like to blame it all on life

Maybe we just weren't right, but that's a lie, that's a lie

And we can deny it as much as we want

But in time our feelings will show

'Cause sooner or later

We'll wonder why we gave up

The truth is everyone knows.'

I stopped playing and looked over at Nathan, who was biting his lip. 'Is it really bad?'

'Not at all.' He gave me a small smile. 'Is it about Ed?'

'No,' I replied, truthfully. 'It's really a song about every break-up when everything fit perfectly. Like Daisy's relationship with Jake. They hooked up and then they ended it and then now they're officially an item.'

'So you and Ed weren't the perfect fit?'

'No.' I replied, looking up at him. 'If we'd been the perfect fit then he wouldn't have cheated. But I'm glad he did because otherwise I wouldn't have met you.'

His lips turned up into a smile. 'This reminds me of my parents actually. They were together and broke up, but then they realised they were meant to be together, you know?' He strummed on his guitar and looked thoughtful for a moment. 'Almost, almost is never enough, So close to being in love.'

I nodded and scribbled down the lyrics as the next lines came into my mind. 'If I would have known that you wanted me

The way I wanted you

Then maybe we wouldn't be two worlds apart

But right here in each other's arms.

And we almost, we almost knew what love was

But almost is never enough.'

Nathan nodded. 'That's good.' He grabbed my pencil, circling the lyrics we'd just decided on together. 'So that can be the chorus. Can you play the chords for the verse again?' I did as he asked and he continued to sing. 'If I could change the world overnight

There'd be no such thing as goodbye.'

An hour later and he'd helped me finish the song. I'd pulled him into a hug and kissed him on the lips, pleased that we'd sorted it. 'There, all ready for your next album.' He said with a smile. 'Do you want to do a run-through?'

I bit my lip. 'I actually think it would sound better as a duet, you know?' I scribbled on 'Nate' over one of the verses, writing our names to make it clear who was singing what. 'What do you think?'

'It's up to you, it's your song.' He said with a lopsided smile.

'Well I think your voice works well with it.'

'Then let's give it a go.'

The next day, Eric had organised a photoshoot with the aim of having some good album artwork for Made in the USA, although he also wanted to update the photos on my social media websites, as well as my own website. Nathan had decided to tag along as he'd finished the last song he needed for his album. It meant at least I had someone to talk to in between shots, although I worried what outfit Eric had instore for me.

We met at Eric's hotel, where my hair was curled and scrunched with product until it had a beach-babe vibe to it and my eyes were given their usual smokey-eyed make-over. I changed into the denim mini-shorts they had for me from the music video shoot, as well as the cowboy ankle boots. Then I slipped into the off-the-shoulder cream crop top, which had large angel wings marked onto the back of it. With a dangling silver necklace and some bracelets and a ring, Eric gave his nod of approval and we headed off to the first place we were taking photographs, which happened to be the Hollywood sign.

'Okay Lucy, the first photo I'm thinking is of you facing the Hollywood sign.' The photographer told me. 'Arms out, looking excited.' I did what I was told, listening to the camera clicking away. 'Yep, perfect. Can we add in the guitar?' My guitar was placed beside me and I held it in place with my hand. 'Yeah that looks great. Okay, Lucy, turn around and have the guitar in the middle of you. Yep that's perfect. Smile. Now pout. Yep the camera loves you.' I laughed at that bit as Nathan rolled his eyes. It was something photographers said far too much.

The photoshoot continued and I posed in the trunk of a chevy (of course), lying down and then with sunglasses on. Then I was directed to the front, leaning against the open bonnet of the car, which seemed weird to me. Then they said something which caught me by surprise.

'Nathan, can we get you in some of these photos?' Eric asked after talking in private with the photographer. My eyes widened and I glanced over at my boyfriend, who looked as surprised as I was. 'I'll send them over to your manager before actually publishing them.' My manager added.

'Sure, I don't see why not.' Nathan shrugged, sending me a lopsided smile.

The photos started off simple, with a close up of our hands intertwined and then our hands making a heart shape. Even the photo of us stood in front of the Hollywood sign, backs turned with me looking over my shoulder was alright. Then he wanted the mushy stuff and I felt like I was back filming Ed's music video in Nashville again. It felt awkward posing, almost-kissing, in front of the cameras and I wished they weren't there so that I could relax. But then Nathan looked at me, his eyes soft and kind, and somehow it made everything better.