"I cannot believe you Stunned me."
"Don't be such a baby. You're fine, aren't you?"
"That isn't the point! It's the principle of the thing. You don't just go around Stunning people, especially not when they're all loopy on pain potions!"
"But I Stunned you because you were all loopy on pain potions."
"Merlin help me, Potter, I swear I will rip off your dick and make you eat it."
"...Surprising."
"What?"
"I thought you'd be a prude about all things related to sex."
"Seriously? Why?"
"Well, because you're from a huge pureblooded family, and you had your weird pureblooded family rituals and shit, and I thought that such talk was frowned upon in polite society."
"It is. But who cares? If I want to talk about my sex life, who's going to stop me?"
"You can't talk about something that doesn't exist, Draco."
"We were just talking about your dick, though."
"...Low blow."
"You started it!"
"Yeah, and I can finish it, too!"
"Potter, what would Charlie think if you punched poor, bedridden torture-survivor Draco Malfoy? He'd be so disappointed!"
"...I hate you."
"Love you, too."