Chapter 3

Interrogation chamber located within the Star Killer base.

What I told him was true. As he heard my permission for him to end my life, Ben completely sobered up from his unpredictable outrage and stared at me with a solemn expression. His face conveyed a mixture of disbelief and disappointment, further fuelling the turmoil inside of me. He was in no position to disapprove my choices after making the wrong ones all of his life.

The glowing red saber, which was pointed at my abdomen, was hastily deactivated by Ben and returned to his pocket. My body remained pressed backwards against the steel bench in anticipation for his next move. It was likely that he would take pleasure in torturing me before he showed me the mercy of putting me out of my misery.

"Why do you no longer value your life, Ana?"

Just hearing my name leave his lips caused me to scoff.

"I never gave you permission to call me that." I uttered, mocking his new identity and hatred of his own true name.

"Do not undermine me Ana. Your pathetic attempt at avoiding to answer my question doesn't satisfy me. What caused you to become so suicidal?"

"Why don't you just read through my mind again? I'm sure you will find the answer there!"

"You've stopped eating as well. Do you hope that after all the effort I have gone through to keep you alive, I will let you starve yourself to death?!"

"You want the truth! That's what happens when you are locked up and kept captive by a monstrous psychopath! I would rather be anywhere in the galaxy right now, as long as I'm not somewhere near you!"

I growled in frustration, forced to remain immobile when the only thing I wanted to do was strike Ben across the face with as much strength as my weak body could manage. My heart was pumping loudly from stress and caused my breathing to become ragged. Sensing my resentment, Ben paused and allowed me to calm down before resuming our conversation.

"I can't kill you Ana. You don't know how much I wanted to moments ago, but something was holding me back. You're the only link I have left to the light side; my only vulnerability. And I hate you for it."

His words weren't said with loathing or anger. Instead they were spoken innocently and honestly, like what he had told me was a terrifying secret. They gave me hope that Ben was still trapped inside somewhere, waiting to be broken out. In a moment of revelation, I found myself opening up to him as well.

"I hated you for months, maybe even years, for what you did to me on Chandrila. Even now as I look at you, I know that Kylo Ren is only a way for you to try and hide away Ben Solo. There is still a chance for you to redeem yourself Ben, just let the light in!"

He looked torn and defeated after hearing my small speech. I knew that I would never be enough to bring back the Ben I once loved. A stray tear fell down my cheek, causing me to look away from Ben in an attempt to hide my saddened thoughts. The click of his mask being reattached to his suit drew my attention back to him. I was left staring at an emotionally detached façade he had created to become a ruthless soldier.

He reached a hand up to his earpiece and contacted an officer in his electronically altered voice. "Return prisoner A13620 to their cell, pending further questioning at a later date." My eyes looked at him in horror as I realized that I would be thrown back into my insignificant chamber and left utterly isolated for another long period of time, before I would be returned to the clutches of Kylo Ren once again.

I squirmed against the straps in protest. This was his punishing way of spiting me for my plea that he should return to the light side. The agony which spread throughout all of my limbs didn't tire me from trying to escape incarceration on this deadly space station.

"Please Ben! Don't make me stay in that cell anymore! There is no torture like the isolation I have endured over the last 3 days! I can't stay locked up in there forever!"

My desperate begging did nothing to affect his decision. The barrier covering his face prevented me from seeing his reaction to my feeble appeals. Despite this, I did not give in, hoping to chip away at his armour that covered his true emotions. Even when the two Stormtroopers which he had summoned arrived in the room, I continued to kick and hiss in protest as they unstrapped me from the table and grasped my shaking form.

"Ben!" I yelled desperately, wanting to cause a scene and stop him from letting me return to the cell. I kicked against the door and screamed at the top of my lungs in determination. I stared at Ben with a wounded look in my eyes as I was hauled away. Tired of watching me wrestle his guards, he levitated his arm towards me and used the force to send my body into an unconscious slumber.

I awoke feeling dazed and stared into my room with blurry vision. As the image around me focused, I noticed a medical droid positioned to my right, feeding liquid supplements into my arm. The nourishment had returned most of my strength and cleared my head. I felt a sense of rejection as I realized that Ben wasn't concerned that I was being treated like a filthy inmate aboard his ship.

A few minutes later, my door opened as a guard entered the room to collect the robot which had been nursing me. I had no idea how long I had been out cold for, and no sense of time. It could have been hours or even days since my confrontation with Kylo Ren. I knew for certain now that the person I had just met was not the Ben Solo I once knew.

My closest friend would have never locked me away in a prison cell. Instead, he would have cared for me and protected me with his life. I would have always done the same for him too, without a second thought. I was reminded of the time we visited Felucia and were exploring the vast jungle.

"Come on Ben! I'll race you up this huge tree here! Loser has to give the winner 100 credits!"

I excitedly began to climb up the tall tree as fast as I could. Looking down, I could see Ben catching up with me and I started to scramble up the trunk even faster. My grip on the tree had loosened, but I didn't care, too busy focusing on beating my best friend to the top. I laughed in delight as the peak of the tree came into view, knowing I would win the race.

But as I grabbed onto a small branch a few feet away from the highest point of the tree, my footing slipped and I lost my hold on the jungle bark. My body began to hurtle towards the ground at an alarming rate. I screamed in dismay as I watched the soil below me grow closer and closer. Just as I was about to collide with the surface, my free falling came to an immediate stop. I glanced up at Ben, who had a look of concentration on his face, his arm outstretched towards me.

It was that careless day spent adventuring on the lush planet, that I learnt that my best friend had the powers of the force. We were both mere 13 year olds, unaware of the capabilities Ben possessed in his hands. Looking back at the event, it was shockingly evident how much his new – found powers had consumed him. I always wondered that if Ben wasn't a force user and just a regular human like me, would he have still been attracted to the merciless first order.

Beliefs such as that had always given me hope that Ben would have returned to the resistance and to his family. Now all I saw was the brutal persona of Kylo Ren, destroying any of his past self. I was the only thing left as evidence for his previous life, which was what caused him to despise me. It hurt to know that someone I used to love so much, was now sickened by my presence.

My heart was slowly becoming blackened by Kylo Ren. The only reason for living anymore was to prove I could survive his constant torment. Being alive was the only piece of power I had over him; my only source of defiance. I glowered at the oppressive wall which sealed me away from everyone, deliberating how many other prisoners had been confined in this tiny cell.

It wouldn't be long until the other generals caught on that I was actually of no use whatsoever to assisting the first order. I was unsure of what influence Kylo had over them, but knew that Snoke would likely have the last word over any of Kylo's activities. I dreaded the idea of the supreme leader becoming aware of my existence, knowing that it would make my time so far on the Star Killer feel like nothing compared to the suffering he would make me go through. I just had to pray that no generals would go behind the back of Ren and inform him.

Still exhausted from the insomnia I had tolerated on the ship, my eyes began to slowly lower, whilst I was still trapped deep in thought. My body relaxed onto the hard surface I was lay on and started to drift away into a deep sleep. The last thing I saw before my eyes completely shut, was the large cell door, which kept me in my enclosure like a zoo animal.