His fucking kisses.

That was always Roman's kryptonite. Even when he was mad at Dean or maybe just a little pissed off at something he'd do, Dean could kiss him and every single time, Roman would fall victim to those beautiful lips. Those soft, wet, pink, inviting oh-so-tempting lips. That carried Roman's pleasure and ultimately his pain.

That's how he wound up in this current situation. With Dean kissing his neck, and Roman letting him. His eyes were closed and his whole body felt like it was catching fire from the intensity Dean put in each kiss. Wet lips cascaded across his skin as Dean held Roman's hands suspended above his head. His pale fingers kept them there as he very slowly... worked his way down his body. The toxic dose of his love mixed with whiskey told Dean to keep going and told Roman to let it happen.

"Dean please." Roman let out the most pathetic whimper. His mind fought against what is heart was saying. That this needed to stop, he couldn't let Dean have him again.

"What? Do you not want me?" The fucker had the nerve to say it as he kissed each of Roman's abs, and then he softly licked around his belly button, that seductive tongue sucked around it then, once more he was back on those perfect lips. He nipped at Roman's playfully and Roman couldn't help but to kiss him back. His heart was winning again, letting it takeover for his brain, for just one more moment he was Dean's. And it was so wrong.

So so wrong.

"You know i want you." Roman's eyes slowly opened after a couple of kisses. He breathed softly, and watched as blue eyes stared back at him. "But i don't want you like this." You can say that it was pure courage spiraled through Roman as he spoke, and he could tell, drunk or not Dean was definitely paying attention. "And i know, you don't want me while you're drunk either." Roman softly pushed Dean on his back so he was on top. The former lovers stared at each other for a small while before Roman softly cupped his face. Dean's blue eyes filled with tears and Roman could tell he was hurting just as much as he was.

"Roman..." Dean looked up at him as Roman wiped one of his tears away. "I..."

"Shh. Don't." Roman softly kissed Dean's tear stained mouth. "We can talk about it in the morning."

Dean kissed him back while holding onto Roman for dear life. His kiss, like Roman's love was temporary, Dean knew. But it wouldn't stop him from enjoying in it for now.

After all, now was all they had.

xxx

When Dean woke up, he didn't expect Roman to be there. He didn't expect last night to be anything but a dream to be honest. But as his eyes opened, he felt strong arms surround him, and heavy breathing near his neck. It was so familiar, and so very comforting. Dean even thought about going back to sleep just so he could have a few more hours with Roman. More hours to cuddle, laugh, kiss.. love. But this wasn't a fantasy, this was the real world and in the real world, he broke this man's heart. Maybe too many times.

And he didn't know if he could ever mend it.

Roman mumbled something unintelligible in his sleep and Dean just listened softly. He had a killer headache and the light peeking through the window was making his eyes hurt but, the still of Roman's heart and the warmth radiating off his body was making Dean feel at home. Maybe a little too much. Dean softly caressed the small hairs on Roman's arm and it caused Roman to giggle in his sleep.

"Monkey! stopppp, i'm sleeping." Roman whined to him, unknowingly pulling Dean in closer to his body.

"Ro..." Dean turned in his arms, shifting their positions so he was on top and he could see that handsome face. He couldn't resist watching Roman's lips part as he slept, those beautifully plump pink clouds that looked so very kissable right now. He remembered kissing them last night while crying, and god he missed those lips. He missed this man period. His pale hand landed on Roman's chest, and softly he played with some of his chest hair while he watched him breathe in, and out. in.. and out. Roman ended up smiling with his eyes still closed. "Ro? Are you awake?"

"Mmm." Roman smirked, his big hand landing on the small of Dean's back, right near the curve of his ass. His eyes crept open and there he saw those beautiful blues that Dean called eyes. Roman would never forget how beautiful this man was for the rest of his life. He touched Dean's bottom lip softly, causing the younger man to smile. "There it is.. that smile.. it's the perfect way to start a day." Roman admitted shamelessly, watching his ex blush furiously, "Hey."

"Hey." Dean already felt weak under that intense gaze. Roman just had that affect on people. He never noticed it though, but Dean always did. His eyes would trap you in, and once locked, you would be his, it was like a spell, except the only magic being used was his natural charm. Roman ran several fingers through Dean's blonde hair and all Dean could do was close his eyes at the feel. He missed this, all of it. Fucking hell how much he missed him. "That feels good." Dean finally said with a smile.

"Yeah, you always did like this." Roman of course smiled too, his fingers finally removed themselves from Dean's beautiful blond locks and he sighed gently, watching Dean reopen his eyes slowly. "Dean.." Roman tried to mentally prepare himself for the conversation they were about to have. It was nice to just lay with Dean and pretend everything was okay for a moment, but... they had to talk about what happened last night. Even if it did end up in a fight. They needed to clear the thick air fogging between them. "What were you doing here last night?" He asked hesitantly. "You said something about... Cody?"

"I'm sorry." Dean replied right off the bat, holding Roman's gaze. "I know i promised to leave you alone. I fucking promised and i broke it. I'm sorry that i came here so damn drunk and forced myself on you last night. I'm a real asshole." Dean chastised himself.

"Yeah you are." Roman replied honestly. "Why didn't you just come here sober? We could've talked about it. You could've gave me a chance to explain instead of just assuming shit and getting drunk off your ass Dean."

Dean laughed at how right Roman was. They use to talk about everything when they were together. Now? Things had changed so much that Dean had lied to himself and told himself that Roman would be different, that he wouldn't care. Oh how wrong he was. "Honestly? I didn't know how to face you sober." Dean laughed humorlessly. "I drank and drank some more trying to fucking forget about seeing you and him kissing, but the more i drank the more i felt.. drawn to you. Apart of me was screaming to just go home, but another kept telling me to go to yours, and confront you. I listened to the latter and i as soon as i saw you my heart... Ro, you don't even know what just the sight of you does to me." Dean blushed, and as they locked eyes again the soft bite to Roman's lip was not missed by Dean. "I was angry at you and jealous.."

"Of me and Cody?" Roman asked him, cutting him off.

"Yeah." Dean nodded. "Once i saw you two together at Lily's, i froze up. I could barely breathe. Seeing the guy I'm in love with, kissing another guy, it just.. made my heart sink."

Roman looked up at the ceiling at that and contemplated what Dean was saying for a minute. "Why do you keep saying that?" Roman turned to look back at him, eyes filled with wonder and a little confusion.

"Saying what?" Dean was confused too.

"That you love me." Roman said it almost like a question, "You don't love me Dean."

"Umm what?" Dean was getting offended, "I do love you."

"No you don't."

"Ro i do."

"No." Roman said for a final time, his voice eerily calm. "You don't. You know how i know you don't? Because you hurt me. You've hurt me more than anyone else I have i come into contact with my entire life, Dean. Then you come back years later, only to hurt me all over again. When you're in love with someone you don't hurt them. You don't treat them the way you treat me. And that's all you've done to me, Dean. Hurt me." Roman sighed then looked up at the ceiling once again. "So please, don't tell me you love me, when i know the truth. You can't love me because you don't know how to love someone without hurting them."

Dean really didn't have a response to that. He loved him, that's for sure but Roman was right, all Dean ever did was hurt him. He looked at Roman for a second then looked up at the ceiling along with Roman. He could tell Roman was hurting, trying not to show it. But Dean was always good at reading him. He wanted to just take the pain away, be the guy Roman needed and stay out of his life for good. Let him be happy with Cody. But his heart was selfish. It told him stay. To try and think about was how to fix them. But how could he fix what was already broken?

"Renee is pregnant." Dean just spit out, outta nowhere. It was the reason why he couldn't ever be truly happy with Roman. It was the reason he lied and hurt him by saying he loved her. He probably could've eased Roman into this more effectively, but Dean had to get it off his chest and just let the chips fall where the may. "I lied to you over the phone that day when i said i loved her, Ro." Dean breathed out slowly, trying to get his words together, "I did love her once.. i think. We were as happy at one point in time, but.. I've always been in love with someone else. I told you i loved Renee that night because it was easier than saying she trapped me with a baby. She did some weird shit with my sperm that i don't really understand and now... i'm about to have a fucking baby." Dean shook his head, scoffing at how ridiculous this was. "And you know me, Ro. That's my kid, it can't grow up without me. I won't let it happen. But as far as where my heart is.. it's yours. And whether you want to believe it or not, I'm in love with you. Crazy in love." Dean turned to look at him, "I don't think I ever stopped."

Roman was breathing heavily and he refused to look at Dean. He didn't know how to process any of this information. "Why should i believe you?" Roman said as his voice strained just a bit. "You left me once. And then did it again. Why should I believe that you love me when you've told her the same thing once upon a time? Why did she get a ring and i got nothing but a note saying that you were sorry? If you always loved me how come you were building this life with her until i came? If you always loved me... why was it not me to begin with?" Roman was weak for him, but he was trying to remain strong. He wasn't gonna let Dean in without a full on breakdown of what was happening between him and her.

"I made a mistake letting you go, Ro." Dean said it honestly. "I know i fucked up and i could make a million excuses as to why i left but you know that i was young and dumb back then. You were my first and only real gay relationship.. i was scared-"

"And you aren't scared now?" Roman sniffled, cutting Dean off. "Dean don't lie to me. Don't pretend you love me when i know you love-"

"JESUS FUCKING CHRIST ROMAN!" It was Dean's turn to cut him off now. "I NEVER loved ANYONE the way i love you." His voice lowered back down to indoor levels. Roman was crying full on now, but he still refused to look at Dean.

"How can I believe you? How can I believe anything that comes out of your mouth anymore?" Roman wiped a tear out of his eye but more tears just kept coming. Dean watched him cry, and he decided to move just an inch closer to comfort him and close the growing space between them.

"Because every night before I go to sleep i pray that I could turn back time and stay with you. Because my body aches when you're not next to me. Because i wish everyday that this is just a dream, and that I'm still yours Roman." Dean sighed, "I sleep in the guest room, Ro. i haven't touched her, in along time actually. All because of how fucking much I want you. If i could, I would stay in this damn bed with you forever and never get up, not until we were back together. And I know, i'm fucking selfish for saying this but I don't want you with Cody. Because you're mine Roman. Just like I'm yours and we can keep denying that fact but it's true. I don't know how to get out of this fucked up situation I'm in, i just know that.. i can't live without you."

Roman finally looked at Dean after he was done and a tear ran down his cheek as their eyes connected. He opened his mouth to say something but Dean just grabbed his face and pressed his lips to Roman's in a hard, passionate kiss. Roman cried against his lips and he kissed Dean back, once again letting him in, once again giving in to him. There were no thoughts of Cody, Renee or anyone else as Dean got on top of him and their small kisses turned into a full on makeout session.

"I can't live without you either." Roman said as he pulled back, looking into his beautiful eyes. Dean only smiled before kissing him again. Because no matter how wrong they both were for what they were doing.. their love told them..

That it felt so right.

"Are you sure i can't come over? I'll be good, i promise." Randy asked Seth over the phone. Seth was having a lazy day to himself when Randy called and they started talking. After their first date, Randy kissed him on the cheek and asked to see him again. Seth blushed and of course, said yes. He liked that they were taking things slow. Usually the young teacher was quick to sleep with guys he was dating but thanks to Roman, Seth found a new love for taking it slow, getting to know a partner before getting intimate. It made it mean more and for Seth, Randy was certainly worth it.

"Well I'm not doing anything right now but laying down in my bed.. naked." Seth teased him. "And i can't promise that I'll behave if you came over here so my final answer will have to be no baby, you can't come over." He could hear the frustrated groan Randy released through the phone and it gave Seth a confidence boost. He was making Randy work for it and as bad as he felt for doing it, he knew that in the end, the pay off would be that much sweeter. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine." Randy said it like he was so disappointed, "I just wanted to see you that's all. But we can do it another time I guess." Seth could hear the disappointment in his voice and he wanted to cave right then and there and tell Randy that it was okay to ceiling over but he didn't want him coming over to lead to kisses which would definitely lead to sex so he had to stand his ground.

"How about I take you out on a date tonight? That way you get to see me and maybe this time you can give me a real kiss?" Seth hoped that that would change the tone of Randy's voice a bit.

"Yeah?" Randy smiled, "I definitely want to go out with you tonight. Say around.. 8 or so?"

"That sounds perf-" Seth was about to finish answering but he was getting another call from Roman. He really needed to change Roman's name from 'Daddy' in his phone one of these days. "Perfect." Seth finally finished his sentence, "Hey babe can i call you back? I'm getting another call." Randy told him yes, and Seth ended their phone call by telling Randy he couldn't wait to see him then he clicked over to Roman and quickly answered, "Hey Rome, you okay?"

"No, Seth. I'm not okay." Seth heard Roman sigh heavily. "I just locked myself in my bathroom."

"Okay?" Seth ran a hand through the growing hair on his chest, "You wanna tell me why you locked yourself in the bathroom?"

"Maybe because Dean is in my room right now, getting dressed?" Roman looked down at his carpet and shook his head, "He came over drunk last night and we almost had sex."

"WHAT?" Seth shouted as he sat up in his bed, so loud that Roman had to turn down his phone volume so that Dean couldn't hear. "Rome oh my god. Dean's there.. right now?"

"Yes." Roman responded looking towards the locked door. "And i need to tell someone what's happening or i'm gonna lose my fucking mind." Roman ran a frustrated hand through his hair and sighed.

"Okay, tell me everything. Start from the beginning and leave nothing out." Seth said, offering his ex his undivided attention.

"Okay." Roman breathed, "I was on the phone with Cody setting up another date last night when Dean called teling me he was drunk and to let him in. At first i told him no, I wasn't going to let him come in and I told him to just go home. But after a while, i saw how drunk he was and.. i couldn't resist and.. I let him in. He automatically kissed me, got me in bed and we were so close to having sex. But i stopped him, thinking about my own heart and his stupid fiancé at the same time. I told Dean that we shouldn't do this and he agreed because he was drunk. We fell asleep in each other's arms and when i woke up, it was like he was mine once again Seth. It like three years hadn't passed between us. But we got into it and he ended up telling me that Renee is pregnant, and that he wants their baby to grow up in a stable home and that's the original reason he hurt me in the first place. He said he loved me, that he couldn't fucking live without me and i admitted my truths too. I told him the same thing. We ended up, touching and kissing for a long time, but he got a call from Renee just as we were about too.. ya know and now he's getting dressed to go to a damn doctors appointment and I'm locked in the bathroom trying to figure out what the fuck i should do now."

"Wow." Seth said as he tossed his bare feet to the floor. He got up and walked to the kitchen with Roman still on the other line. "Roman i don't even know what to say. Like this all got that much more complicated. Is he still there now?" Seth asked as he poured himself some milk and cereal.

Roman was looking in the mirror at himself, disgusted by what he saw. He was a man trapped in a love triangle, and all because he couldn't let go of the one guy who hurt him more than anything. He wanted to punch the glass but instead he just looked away, hearing Seth call out for him. "Yeah.. he's still here." Roman said with a harsh sigh. "Is it bad I still want him?" Roman asked Seth honestly. "Is it bad that i want him even though he's getting married, even though his girlfriend is pregnant. Even though, I'm dating someone else?"

Seth took a scoop of corn flakes and contemplated for a second, "You had him first, Rome. You guys loved each other first. He may be getting married but he definitely doesn't want too. You may have Cody but you'll never care for him the way you care about Dean. Is it bad? I can't answer that. But you should ask yourself Ro, does it feel right?"

Roman took a second to think over what Seth was saying and as he did, there was a knock on the door. "Ro?" Dean said through the door. Roman stilled and put the phone down on the counter, keeping Seth on the line. He opened the door for Dean and then smiled at him. "Hey, I'm heading out.. i just wanted to um.. say goodbye."

"Right, yeah. Goodbye dean." Roman gave him a wave and thought that was gonna be it, but Dean pulled him in by his pj bottoms and gave Roman a soft kiss. Roman melted against his lips, kissing Dean back gently. Seth was right about one thing, kissing him felt so good, so.. right.

"Mm." Dean pulled back and then saw Roman's eyes slowly open. He bit his lip and smiled, "I love you." Dean admitted, putting his hands around Roman. The samoan man looked into the beautiful blues and he was helpless. His heart pounded against his chest as he kissed him again and whispered:

I love you too.

Roman was getting ready for his date with Cody and all he could think about was the events of last night and today with Dean. Yes, they talked everything out and yes they stole a few kisses and admitted their truths but.. Renee was still in Dean's life. He was still gonna marry her just to give his baby a happy life.

And that left Roman alone and confused.

He didn't want to have to sneak in sex sessions with Dean whenever they both were horny. He didn't want to have to be 'Daddy's' secret boyfriend when their baby was born. He wanted all of Dean and he couldn't have him, and it was all so complicated. Seth had asked him to do what felt right and to Roman, being with Dean felt right. But so did being with Cody. He was a constant in Roman's life. Cody was sweet to him, good looking and made Roman laugh. He was everything Roman needed right now.

Roman was deciding on what shirt to wear when his doorbell rang. He walked downstairs, skipping the shirt and saw Cody waiting on his front porch. He opened the door and Cody let himself in, his eyes slowly raking in Roman's half nakedness. "Hey." Cody smiled and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend, giving him a kiss. "Were you figuring out what to wear or trying to get me hard before we even went on our date?" He laughed and his smile made Roman smile.

"Well you know it is my life goal to get you in my bed again." Roman teased, cupping Cody's face to give him another round of kisses. Cody kissed him back quite passionately. Before they knew it they were walking backwards towards the couch. Cody pushed Roman's down on it, then straddled his legs. Roman's hands wasted no time in exploring Cody's body, running up under his shirt towards his abs. Cody moaned in his mouth at the sensation and slowly he ground his hips up to meet with Roman's. "Fuck.. Cody I swear you're.."

"Amazing?" Cody finished his sentence for him, before he kissed his lips once again. "If we keep this up we're gonna miss our movie." Cody said against his lips, but made no effort in pulling away. Roman's hands were now all over him, bringing him in, tossing his shirt off, and cupping his ass too. Cody moaned when they started dry humping on the couch, something he hasn't done since he was a teenager. But with Roman it just felt so damn good that he didn't want it to end. "Roman.." Cody's head fell onto Roman's shoulder as he grinded against his erection. He let out a whimper as Roman started controlling his movements. There was no turning back now, they had already reached the point of no return.

Roman suddenly stopped them before Cody could come and forced him to lock eyes. They both panted and as they stared intensely at each other, Roman couldn't help but to think about Dean. Dean who was at a doctor's appointment right now to see his baby in a sonogram for the first time. Dean, who was about to be a married man. The same Dean who loved him so much. Suddenly Roman pushed Cody down on the couch and then sighed, "I'm sorry. I just.." Roman tried to talk his way outta this.

"It's Dean." Cody answered for him. "Isn't it?"

Roman couldn't lie to Cody, he knew Cody would see right through that. So instead he just nodded his head, then hid his face in his hands, embarrassed that he was thinking about Dean while he had a really good man right next to him. Cody watched for a second, then sighed, getting up off the couch. Roman thought he was preparing to leave but instead, Cody dropped to his knees in front of him and took Roman's hands away from his face. "I know he likes to play mind games with you Ro. And i know he's hurt you to the point where you don't think you'll be happy with anyone else but.." Cody started unbuckling Roman's jeans and then he tore them down his legs. He tossed them across Roman's living room, then slowly he spread Roman's legs so he could fit perfectly between them.

"Cody? What are you-?" Roman didn't get a chance to finish as Cody started to pull out his semi hard cock. He licked his lips at it then smiled as he looked up at Roman.

"I can make you happy Rome. Happier than he ever could all you have to do is let me." Cody then took the head of Roman's cock straight into his mouth, watching Roman's face as he started to give him the best blow job he's had in a long time. He took more of Roman in and Roman could see the imprint of his dick near Cody's jaw and all he could think about in that moment was..

Dean who?

A/N: A bitch said i couldn't write ambreigns and I was like.. bitch where? Ha, just kidding. But it looks like Dean's not giving up on Roman and Cody isn't giving up on him without a fight either. Who do you think is more deserving of Roman's heart? Cody or Dean?

Next chapter: Deanee baby doctor visits, Randy and Seth cuteness, Roman and Dean do something they shouldn't and a Cody and Dean face off. Please review, that always helps me get chapters out faster! Love you -Melle