Note: This is an UPDATED version of chapter 26, with some small changes and additional dialogue. This is also to announce that the five epilogue chapters are STILL going to happen. I'm very sorry I've been on hiatus for the past few months, but life has a way of doing that. The good thing is, I've found new inspiration for this story and some portions of the epilogue chapters have undergone some changes. So keep on reading, my dear readers. I will make sure to end this story well. Also, I recommend that you guys read the whole story from the beginning again if you have time, because a lot of these epilogue chapters will tie in loose ends from the whole story before.
Chapter XXVI - Monotone
Some day in July. Or is it August? Has fall come already? I forget… It's hard to keep track of time with no eyes. In a world of darkness, the best you could do is to remember the process of a day. Ever since the destructive fire burned my house down a year ago, my eyes were lost to me—damaged beyond repair as they have told me. It is a strange feeling, being blind. Living life permanently in a state of perpetual darkness is an unsettling feeling, but one I have grown accustomed to and found comfort in. Still, there is a longing for sight that will never go away. I live day by day now, with my only units of time being my awakening in the mornings, my three meals, my nurse-assisted walks in the park outside the hospital, and my going to sleep. A simple life. Perhaps it suits me better than how I've lived the past few years. It's been exactly a year today since I've lived my life in this simple and comforting darkness, and my doctor gave me a small laptop as a gift, recommending that I start keeping a daily journal. He says it is part of the therapy. I believe it's simply a way to help me pass the time and keep me out of trouble. I suppose it'll do.
The doctor, Dr. Saru Tobi, is very kind and understanding to me, but often does not see me as more than just any other patient. Not that I can blame him, of course, considering he has to care for so many people. My nurse, Miss Tsu Nade, is a stern but gentle woman who was always patient with me, especially in the first month or two when I was especially restless with my condition. I give her my utmost respect. Dr. Shay Veritas paid me some periodic visits and has felt much pity for me. Lucie, this little girl who's apparently taken an interest—or should I say amusement—in me, visits me often as well. Every time she and her fellow orphaned children visit the hospital, she always made her matron let her stay with me. At first I was irritated by her and her antics, but I've slowly managed to get used to her. Over the past few months, she and I managed to play checkers together, even with my blindness. The Titans have visited me once in a while as well, though as time goes on their visits become less and less frequent. From what I hear, they should be living their lives happily.
I wonder when I will be able to do the same.
My name is something I've elected to dispel from my memory. I am nobody. I am nothing. I am merely an existence, wandering through the passage of time living every day in monotone.
Everything in my life is monotone.
…
A door opened. Two figures walked in as one waved her hand to light the various candles scattered across the room, casting a gentle light onto the Azarathean furniture. The man who was green from head to toe pulled on his Azarathean garments, fidgeting with them so much he accidentally bumped into a table stand and knocked over a pot. He let out a small squeak as the pot came within inches from the floor before being surrounded by a black aura and abruptly stopping in midair. The pot levitated for a moment then flew back up and gracefully landed on the table stand. The man gave a sigh of relief before locking eyes with the woman with gray skin and indigo hair, who promptly gave him a deep glare.
"Heh," Garfield Logan chuckled. "I was just testing your reflexes."
"Sure you were," Raven Roth mumbled.
"It's okay," Gar said, assuming an air of confidence. "If I broke that old thing I could have had it replaced like it was a cheap knock-off from Pottery Barn."
"Mhmm, that's precious, comparing a 287 year old artifact to something from Pottery Barn," Raven Roth mumbled. "Boy, you sure let this 'celebrity status' thing go to your head."
"I saved the world! Come on, Rae. When was the last time someone asked for your autograph? You can't remember, can't you? We don't get noticed that much on Earth anymore. Everyone's so used to us. "Changeling and Raven stop a bank robbery"—does that sound like something to go on the news anymore? No!—cause it's old news now."
"It's also because we aren't superheroes anymore."
"Tch, minor detail. My point is here in New Azarath, I'm still in the limelight so lemme get my moment to shine again, please."
"Oh you've had plenty of moments in the limelight in my world," she retorted. "How about that one time you were almost arrested for impersonating me—a New Azarathean official—when word got out that we had switched bodies during the whole Interplanetary Cleansing Act debate? Or when you shifted into a monkey and caused a riot in a marketplace a year after we started dating? Or when you threw a flame splitter scroll at Lady Asuna and almost incinerated her?"
"Okay, okay, one: that was not even my fault that we switched bodies. Two: how was I supposed to know that Azaratheans had never seen a monkey before?—"
"—a green talking monkey."
"—a green… talking monkey, alright. I get it. And three… well the third one was kinda my fault. Playing football with Vic using a magic scroll wasn't the best idea. But hey that lady destroyed the scroll in midair before it even got near her. So… no harm no foul?" he smiled cheekily.
Raven rolled her eyes. "We call her Lightning Flash Asuna for a reason. Her reaction times and reflexes are the fastest in New Azarath. But that still doesn't change the fact that I got a huge mouthful from her. Oh!—it's starting."
Garfield pulled at his pants. "This Azarathean suit itches."
"Deal with it. It's showtime."
As the grand door before them opened, the couple slowly walked out arm in arm into the sunlight, greeted by a wave of cheers from thousands of Azaratheans underneath. Immediately Gar shot up his right hand into a regal wave, nudging Raven to do the same. Though she rolled her eyes, she followed suit. The two stood on a tall balcony on the Azarathean Palace together, a slight breeze brushing past them. Near the edge of the balcony floated an orb of light, and the couple slowly made their way towards it and simultaneously placed their hands on the orb.
"Friends and fellow New Azaratheans," Raven said, her voice magically projected throughout the throng of people below. "Today marks the anniversary of our victory in the Second Sorcerer-Demon War. Now, as part of our age-old tradition, we now will commence the celebration that has been with us since the beginning of Azarath, the celebration of that which defines who we are." Together, she and Garfield lifted up the orb of light, which radiated in the sky.
The two then said together, "Let the Festival of Lights begin!" A roar of cheers brought forth the beginning of celebration. As Gar looked around, he saw what seemed to be an endless wave of specks of people shouting and rooting. He could have sworn he heard some call out his name. A chuckle escaped him. These people were all cheering for him. Him—the Inheritor of Dante, one of the Three Magi of Azarath. He—the guy who nobody thought would amount to much, the guy who was looked as the bottom rung of the Teen Titans—was now being praised and regarded as the savior of the world. And so he laughed and waved, basking in all the attention he received. He was like a king.
Moments later the king became a peasant once more as Garfield and Raven stood inside the inner chamber changing out of the uncomfortable Azarathean wear and back into their regular Earth clothes. "And there goes my fifteen seconds of fame," Gar sighed.
"If you want to be famous again, you could always just go back to being a superhero instead of quitting," Raven replied.
"Re-ti-red," he retorted. "I'm retired. I didn't quit."
"Potayto, potahto."
"And besides, the world doesn't need me anymore. Jump City is well protected by the New Teen Titans now, Steel City the same with the New Titans East. Batman, Oracle, and one of the new Robins is taking care of Gotham great while Dick and Star are doing just fine in Blüdhaven. Technically Vic and Karen aren't on the superhero job either so it's not like we're the only ones."
"Vic and Karen are still on-call superheroes as Cyborg and Bumblebee. What we are is just plain normal citizens."
"And are we not okay with that?" Gar smiled.
Raven rolled her eyes. "I'm not okay with you becoming lazy, fat, and bald in the future."
"What happened to 'but we love each other and that's all that matters'?"
She gave a tiny wink. "Welcome to reality, hot shot. You know from the time I started living with you in that apartment until now, you still don't even have a job yet. Our superhero pensions won't last us much longer, you know. And not to mention you have all those student loans left to pay."
Gar grinned slightly at the memory of when Raven first started living with him. It was just after he and Raven had switched bodies after five years of separation and he and Victor had finally found Raven's whereabouts. After convincing her to not to leave again, he had offered for her to stay in his apartment with him.
"I want you to stay here by me," he had said. "We… we don't even have to be friends if that's not what you want. We don't have to talk if you don't want to. But—but please just stay here with me." And—and I'll make food for you whatever you want, whenever you want. I'm not much of a cook and I'm not good at anything with meat because I never eat it, but I'll learn how to. And you'll never have to pay rent or anything. I'll pay for it all. I don't have a job yet but I have enough student loans to last us a while…"
Gar frowned for a moment, realizing that in their year of living together, in the end Raven had done most of the cooking and the rent was all paid by their superhero pensions. He still hadn't gotten a job and his student loans were long gone.
"Alright, alright Mom," he sighed exasperatingly. "I'll get on it. Let's go home and first thing I'll do is look up job openings. Okay?"
"You better. Oh and if you have time, do you mind going to the doctor for me?"
"About your stomach cramps? Sure." Suddenly he jumped back. "Is there another demon growing inside you again?" he cried aloud jokingly, and was met with a swift kick.
…
Blüdhaven was a town just south of Gotham and was described by advertisers as "The New Metropolis: the Place Where Superman Would Go on Vacation". Reality didn't fare well with those who were fooled by the false advertising and in truth Blüdhaven was like a criminal underground that decided to surface. A more accurate representation was when Nightwing once described the city he now called home: "When you die in Blüdhaven, going to Hell is considered a promotion." Perhaps the only source of justice in that damned city was the Grayson residence, which one night rang with sharp cries:
"Get over here you little bug!" Jinx shouted from the top of her lungs. "I swear to God if you don't sit still I will blast you into oblivion!"
"Careful there, Jinx," Flash replied. "This is Starfire's kid we're talking about. She could probably do the same to you."
Both sighed and sank down to the ground in exhaustion before the sound of giggling propped them right back up onto their feet. "There!" Jinx yelled, pointing towards the direction of the stairs. In an instant, the Flash sprinted towards the stairs and neatly caught Mar'i Grayson in his hands.
"Caught ya, you little beastie," he smirked, tickling the baby's round belly.
"Good job, Wally," the woman said as she breathlessly caught up to him. "Gah, why are we always the ones on babysitting duty?"
"Come on, Jinx. How could you say "no" to this adorable little baby?" Wally gently pinched Mar'i's fat cheeks, to which she giggled.
"I hate kids," she groaned. "You and I are never having one ever. Ever. You hear?"
"Whatever," Flash shrugged off. "You'll come through someday."
"Don't make me gag. When are Dickwad and Scumfire comin' home anyway? They said they'd be here almost two hours ago."
"Jeez, what put you in such a bad mood?"
"This was supposed to be our date night! Instead we're stuck taking care of 'Lucky' over there." She motioned towards Mar'i.
Flash chuckled. "Why do you always call Mar'i 'Lucky'?"
"Because she's goddamned lucky that I don't blow off her head every time I lay eyes on her."
"Well go get Lucky her bottle. It's time for her to go to sleep." Jinx groaned again as she left to go get the bottle and formula while Flash gently rocked Mar'i in his arms. "Don't you mind her," he whispered. "She's one of the grumpiest girls I know but deep down she's a real sweetie."
It was about twenty minutes later when Nightwing and Starfire came home. "We're so incredibly sorry," the former apologized immediately while the latter went to care for her sleeping baby. "We got really held back today."
"Which of the gangs was it this time?" Wally asked as Jinx continued grumbling to herself in the corner. "Dragon Tails? Arsenic Candy? Apocalypse?"
"Turns out it was all three. King Pin manipulated the boss leaders into starting a full out gang war on the streets. We managed to stop the gang war or at least hold it off for now, and we finally got King Pin under bars at last but the three gangs have a lot more tension with each other than they did before. The commissioner's afraid that a gang war is inevitable though."
The Flash shook his head. "You know if you need anything, Jinx and I are always ready to help out. I'm sure Cyborg and Bumblebee are, too."
"Yeah, thanks." Nightwing smiled. "Mar'i didn't break anything this time, did she?"
"Just a crack in the bathroom window. Oh, and you might want to replace the lamp inside the study."
"A baby her age is supposed to eat, sleep, and poop, not run around on her feet like a madman," Jinx grumbled.
"Tamaranian babies mature faster than Earthling babies," Starfire explained. "And my people are a warrior race. Mar'i contains the bloodline of warriors so it is only natural that she find a release for all that energy inside her."
Jinx rolled her eyes in annoyance. "Mhmm, okay, cool story, buh-bye. We're leaving, Wally!" She promptly grabbed him by his ear and dragged him out, barely giving him time to say goodbye.
"Thanks again!" Dick called after them as the door closed shut. He sank into a chair and rubbed his temples. "I can't believe we came home so late."
"As do I," his wife replied as she came from the nursery. "But truly there was no way we could have come home earlier. If we had, King Pin could have gone free while Blüdhaven becomes the site of a full out gang war. It was due to our efforts that the city is safe, for now at least."
"I know, I know. But still…" he glanced back at the nursery. "Lately we've been away from home a lot. I don't even remember the last time I sat Mar'i on my lap and watched TV with her. I don't want her to—"
"To what, Dick Grayson?"
"…to grow up without me." He sighed. He knew what he was getting himself into when he agreed to take on the Blüdhaven post, even with Starfire five months pregnant and Batman strongly advising him against it. It was a job that no one else could do, but at what cost? His own daughter was growing up so quickly while he was busy out cleaning up the streets. He was absolutely crushed when he found out his daughter spoke her first word when he wasn't there. He had just gotten home from a court-hearing in Gotham testifying against Blockbuster—who was at the point the criminal mastermind of Blüdhaven whom it took him nearly a year to take down—when Starfire told him that Mar'i had spoken for the first time.
Her first word: "Stay".
Dick felt the reassuring arms of his wife wrap around him as she rested her chin on his shoulder. "You did what you had to do," she whispered to his ear. "You are the hero of this city. We both are. It has been almost a year since we have moved here and already crime has decreased significantly. You are a hero."
"I don't want to be a hero," he sighed. "I want our family."
"I know," Starfire's breath tickled his ear. "I know."
…
Jinx yawned as she unceremoniously scratched her back, grumbling, "I hate kids…" Wally sat next to her on the subway they took to get back home to Metropolis. "To think we have to take a half hour subway every single time they ask us to babysit."
Wally shrugged. "It could take us less than five minutes if you'd just let me give you a piggyback ride and run there on foot."
"No way! You know how many bugs flew into my mouth last time we tried that?" She ran her fingers through her pink hair. "Besides the only reason we babysit so often is 'cause you always volunteer."
"I like kids," he smiled. "You gotta admit Mar'i is a cute baby."
"I don't care for Lucky at all," Jinx griped. "It's because of her that we missed our date night."
The man glanced at the clock on the subway train and noticed that it was only past midnight. "The night's still young. We can go catch a movie or something. You always wanted to go to a drive-in movie theater, didn't you?"
"We don't have a car, smart one."
"Oh yeah… Whelp, I guess a regular theater will have to do."
"Tch." Soon the subway station came to a stop and the couple departed, walking out of the subway station and down the streets of Metropolis. As they passed one of the local restaurants, they did not notice two of their friends walking out.
"Ah, I'm so full!" Victor Stone sighed as he gave a small, satisfied belch.
"What'd I tell you?" his girlfriend, Karen Beecher, said. "My friend, Liz, knows what she's talking about. If she says a restaurant is good, oh it's good."
"I had no idea that sushi could be that delicious. Oh man, if only I could go back in time to when we first walked in just so I could eat it all again…"
The two walked side by side, both staring up at the starlit sky. "It's only been a month since we've moved to Metropolis," Karen noted. "But you know… it's already starting to feel like home."
Victor nodded. "It feels as though everyone's starting to settle down. Dick, Star, and Mar'i in Blüdhaven, Gar and Raven in Manhattan, us here."
"Heh, could we really be considered 'settled down' though?" she chuckled. "Or have you forgotten we're the only ones not married yet?"
"Only if you're looking at my team. Your team isn't all married."
"Más and Menos don't count," she rolled her eyes. As she walked, her attention was brought to the couples she noticed on the streets. Holding hands, arm in arm, laughing and smiling. Some had children with them. What brought her attention most, however, was when she spotted an elderly couple sitting with each other on a bench.
"Say…" she asked. "Do you think we could be like that someday?"
"Hmm? Oh, them?" Vic tilted his head slightly and placed his hands in his pocket. "Well if we get married someday, then sure."
Her eyebrows flinched slightly at her boyfriend's use of the word "if". Sighing, she said, "Well… I hope so."
"Come on, Karen. You know I don't like talking about things like these."
"What, marriage?"
"Yeah… It makes me nervous y'know?"
She looked away. "I don't know how something as beautiful as marriage can make someone nervous."
"It's just… I dunno how to say it. I'm not great with thinking about commitment things."
"A man and woman love each other and want to be with each other. That's just it—"
"We can think about things like that when the time comes, okay?" he smiled and playfully rested his head on her shoulder as they walked. "For now, let's enjoy our life as it is now."
"…Alrighty, big boy." Karen couldn't help but smile as she pushed his head off. "Get off me. You're heavy!" The two laughed as Karen ran away and Vic chased after her.
…
Malcolm stood in front of the fireplace and stared at the flames that protruded. His eyes then wandered over to the wedding dress on the mannequin nearby. "She never did get to wear her beautiful wedding dress," he said quietly. "I'm sorry, Raven, for everything. I am sorry, for dooming this world to damnation because of my ignorance." Turning to face Raven again, his eyes widened and he took a stepped back in surprise. "A—Anna?"
Raven quickly turned around in confusion, but found no one there. Spinning back, she faced Malcolm and asked him what was wrong. "You—you, you're Anna!" he cried out, taking a step back.
Raven opened her mouth and suddenly found herself saying, "Malcolm, I'm sorry!" Immediately she covered her mouth in surprise as if she did not speak from her own will.
"Anna!" she saw him say as he took another step back towards the fireplace. "Anna, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Forgive me, Anna!" Another step back.
"Malcolm, watch out!" she suddenly cried.
"Forgive me, Anna!" Malcolm unconsciously took another step back, accidentally going too far and stepping straight onto the fireplace. In an instant, his body was engulfed in flames, and he began dashing towards her, screaming and wailing. Tongues of fire licked all around his body and engulfed the wooden floor underneath.
Raven awoke with a start, immediately cringing as she held her head. "Just a dream," she whispered to herself. "Just a dream…" She noticed she was sweating.
"Gar? You there?" she asked as she turned around, surprised to see no one lying on the bed next to her. She then remembered that she had asked him to go to the doctor and figured he must have left already.
Shaking off her headache, she dragged herself out of bed. The moment her feet touched the ground, however, her bedroom erupted in a flash. Her superhero instincts kicking in, Raven immediately jumped to her feet and looked around to find that she was in what seemed like a hospital room. Everything was blurry, like a dream. Almost as quickly as it had appeared, the vision evaporated and she was once again back in her bedroom.
Raven glanced around suspiciously. "What… just happened?" She lifted one foot and took another step. As her foot touched the ground, the vision of the hospital room flickered once more, but disappeared even quicker. Now panting with full alert, Raven took one more step. This time, nothing happened.
With caution, she slowly walked out of her bedroom and towards the bathroom. Flicking on the lights, she turned on the sink and splashed cold water into her face. "I must be dreaming," she said to herself. "I'm not fully awake yet."
Her body froze as the lights suddenly flickered. "Who's there?" she cried out. The lights flickered some more. Raven furrowed her eyebrows. "Azarath Metrion Zinthos," she muttered. To her surprise, she did not sense any unusual presence around her. The lights went off completely. Her body tensed as she readied herself should anything suddenly attack her.
In seconds, the lights went back on. Nothing was there. She gave a sigh of relief and mentally noted to contact the electrician later. Turning back to the mirror, she jumped back in shock. Where her own reflection had been moments ago, there was now someone else's. In the mirror stood a woman in her thirties with crisp brown hair that went to just past her shoulders and bright blue eyes. Raven hurriedly glanced down at her hands and saw that they were still her own gray skinned hands.
Looking back up at the mirror, she saw that same woman staring back at her. She struck Raven as somewhat familiar, but she could not place where. "Wh—" Raven gasped. "Who are you?"
The woman in the mirror did not respond, merely blinked. The Azarathean concentrated and tried to remember from where she had seen that face before. Suddenly her eyes widened in horror and she felt as though a bucket of ice had been poured down her back. "You—" she gasped as her face became even paler. She lifted a finger weakly as she pointed to the mirror.
"You're… Anna Crowe."
It was unmistakable. That face was the face of Anna Crowe. That face was the face that Madame Rouge had disguised as when she was controlled by Malcolm. That face… was now staring back at her.
The mirror slowly began to fog up as the Anna in the mirror also raised her index finger. She placed her finger on the fogged up mirror and became writing. With every stroke of her finger, every letter that she wrote, Raven felt her heart beat faster and faster. In time, she finished writing, and the sorceress read aloud with a shaking voice the message given to her:
"HELP ME"
"A—Anna…" Raven stuttered as she lifted up a hand and placed it on the cold glass of the mirror. With one swift movement she wiped away the fog. She saw her own reflection once more. Anna Crowe was gone.
…
I miss her. My dear Anna. I wonder what she is doing now. I wonder how she is. Perhaps she is married now. Perhaps she has children. I am sure that if she does, they are the spitting image of her. Beauty deserves to live on, after all. I read something once, from a poem or a play or a book: "The moment I met her, my world began to take on color." I remembered this quote when I met Raven. I looked in her eyes and I saw them—a reflection of the colorful world she lived in. I knew then that she was in love. Her love for Garfield Logan brought color in her world. My love for Anna Crowe brought color in mine. But not anymore.
My name is Malcolm Crowe. I am going Nowhere. I am living in Monotone. My fate will Never Change.
~Difficult Words to Say~