I'm on vacation in Langkawi Island, Malaysia and yayy the hotel has WiFi! So this should come out a long time ago but my WiFi doesn't work and it's so frustrating! Btw does anyone misses Elijah?
Thank you so much for all of your feedbacks/reviews, it really helps, thank you again!A special shoutout to the Guest who apologized for his/her long review, DON'T! I LOVE long reviews xx love all of you, truly.
And to another Guest who asked me to stop this silly thing with Kol...nope, not gonna happen.
Chapter 29: What Happens in Denver...
Dear diary,
I'm so sorry that I always write in you for a couple of days and then discarded you for a couple of years. Writing in diary is not my thing but I'm terribly bored right now, in Denver. Jeremy had gone to school, Mr and Mrs Anderson had gone to work and I'm left with Max, the cute golden retriever.
Kol, the Original vampire had gone to school as well, believe it or not. He picked Jeremy up this morning. I still don't trust him with Jeremy but Klaus had said he was there to only keep an eye on my brother...and I happened to be a coincidence. Kol hadn't spoken with me since last night except for the exchange of hellos this morning. He didn't seem mad but I supposed he just felt like I was intruding his safe space that he had created for over a thousand years.
I think I like him.
I stopped writing and stared at the words I had scribbled. What? Oh god, please no. I sighed and took a deep breath.
No, Vanessa. A BIG FAT NO. You cannot like him. Kol Mikaelson is the man that every father had warned their daughters about. He is the man that every mother prayed hard that their daughters would stay away from. He is the man that sees girls as his plaything. He is worst than any playboy in my high school. He is the king of assholes.
Do I need to remind you that Kol Mikaelson is also a psychotic vampire who considers unnecessary bloodshed involving innocent lives as sport? He is also the lunatic vampire who takes innocent lives without remorse and thought of it as fun. Sure, most of us are like that but Kol is a dangerous vampire who you should stay the hell away from, vampires or humans alike.
But that was his only side that he ever wanted everyone to see and to know. Underneath that, there was more to him than he let on. It wasn't like I was trying to find his humanity, no. It would probably be very deep, deep down, buried under all those gruesome and monstrous things he had done over the millenia. I just...I don't know. I wanted to know him, his story, his life. I sounded like a romantic and Vanessa Gilbert is not a romantic. I don't even watch The Notebook for god's sake!
What the hell did he do to me? I believed I drank vervain everyday, there was no way it was a compulsion. It's just that his darkness...drew me in like a moth to a flame.
And I'm afraid there's no way out.
I sighed and read over what I'd written and ripped the pages out, before heading towards the kitchen. I found the lighter and burned the pages, destroying any physical proof that I had the slightest of feeling for this Original vampire. I let out a scream of frustration and stomped my feet on the floor childishly. You see, when I was human, I usually go straight ahead and ran around the neighbourhood to release my frustration. But when I turned into a vampire, there was only one way to get rid of that frustration.
Blood.
I headed to the restaurant/bar, kind of like the Grill and my eyes surprisingly landed on Kol, playing pool. I smiled, remembering the time in the Grill where I taught him how to play.
"So why are you not in school?" I asked him mockingly and he glanced up at me. He hit the white ball, hitting two balls which entered into the pockets. "Wow," I said, genuinely impressed. He rose to his full height, grinning at me.
"I'm a fast learner," he said cockily and I rolled my eyes, smiling.
"Or maybe you had a great teacher," I told him and he chuckled. Seeing he was in a good mood, I wasn't sure if I should mention about last night, but it can't just be left unspoken. "I'm sorry about last night," I said and Kol who was about to shoot the ball froze. Then he straightened up, raising his eyebrow at me. "I shouldn't have said what I said. I figured, if you want to tell me your story, you will."
"One question, darling. Why?" Kol asked and I laughed.
"Why not? Well, I don't want make an enemy out of you," I said, shrugging. "And the way I see it, we're friends. With benefits," I added. Kol looked at me questioningly.
"What's that?" He asked, confused. My cheeks flushed and I quickly averted my eyes from him.
"Nothing," I said quietly and bashfully.
"No, I'm serious. What?" He asked, completely puzzled.
"Forget it," I said, flustered as hell, and headed to the bar quickly. So stupid. I ordered a drink and glanced over my shoulder to see if Kol was looking at me-nope, he was flirting with some blonde bimbo. What is this burning feeling in my chest as I watched his hand traced down her back? With my vampire hearing, I could hear Kol saying sweet things to her and I rolled my eyes. That slut was probably just his lunch, why was I too upset about it? I held back a sigh and finished my drink in one shot, feeling the tight burn in my throat but it didn't dissolve the growing pit of jealousy in my chest. It also didn't help making the itch to rip her throat out disappear.
Get a hold of yourself, Vanessa.
"Another?" A voice asked me. I turned to my left to see a somewhat not bad looking young man in his early twenties. He had short sandy blond hair, styled up with deep green eyes that kind of reminded me of my cat.
"If you want to pay for this sweet 30 year old scotch, sure," I said and he made a surprised face.
"I like a girl who can take her scotch," he said with a lopsided grin. I decided that this could be my lunch and perhaps he could soothe my frustration a little bit while he was at it.
"Hmm, what else do you like?" I asked, giving him one of my best smiles.
"A girl with pretty blue eyes," he told me. "And the one that tells me her name," he added and I laughed, appearing friendly.
"Vanessa," I said. "And you?"
"Ryan. I assume you're not a jailbait?" he asked, just to make sure and I grinned.
"Nope, and I also assume you're not here for a chitchat," I said, feeling bored of beating around the bushes. The woman who was with Kol laughed loudly and it totally killed my mood and I decided to just go straight to the point. I looked at him right in the eye, compelling him, "Follow me." I led him to the ladies. I locked the door and pushed Ryan to the sink, patiently unbuttoning his dress shirt out of courtesy.
"There's no need to hold back," I told him and caught him smirking before his eyes widened in terror. He froze and I glanced at the mirror, admiring my vampire face. "Relax, it's not going to hurt," I compelled and he relaxed instantly. I pulled him down and kissed his neck before sinking my fangs and moaned as his blood filled my mouth. I felt his hand slipped under my shirt and jumped at his foreign touch, pulling away instantly. Now who needed to relax now? I shut my eyes in annoyance, the scenes from the night at the ball and the Grill with Kol came flooding my mind.
There was this rule of hooking up with someone and that was not to hook up with them twice. And I supposed Kol had just learned that because he had made no move and it frustrated me. I decided that the jealousy I felt to the random human he was flirting with was not because I liked him or anything. It was simply the sex. No feelings involved.
Yep, that made a lot more sense than me actually falling for that sociopathic Original vampire.
I glanced at the human and debated what to do. I wasn't in the mood to kill or to do him so I just compelled him to forget and left the ladies in a vampire speed. I saw Kol at the bar and he raised his eyebrow at me.
"What?" I snapped. He then touched my lips without a word, surprising me. Kol wiped the trail of blood with his thumb and I watched as he tasted it, his eyes not leaving mine.
"Hmm, delicious," he said and his eyes darted to behind me before giving me a disapproving look. "You left your food alive," he told me and I rolled my eyes.
"You can't just kill everyone, Kol," I chastised and he opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by the blonde bimbo who had came over towards us.
"Kol baby, what are you doing talking to this slut?" her high pitched voice asked and I growled. What happened next was beyond my control. I didn't even think but just acted on instinct. I snatched a glass on the bar and slammed it into her temple and she shrieked in surprise and pain. I then wrapped a hand around her throat in less than a second, digging my sharp nails into her skin, pulling her towards me as if she was a rag doll.
"And this slut can kill you easily, you stupid whore," I spat, feeling darker and darker as the second passed. The rush of power flowed over me as I watched her struggled to breathe, to hold on to her dear life. I haven't decided if I wanted to just crush her windpipe and toss her away like a broken doll but the bartender and a couple of men at the scene had pulled me away from the poor girl.
I waited for her to look up to me and gave her a sweet smile. I wasn't done with her just yet but I wasn't going to kill her in front of this people. Then my eyes met Kol's, who hadn't moved an inch but was smirking. He was challenging me, daring me to do something heinous. And for a moment, I wanted to give in. I could just kill all of the humans in the bar, playing with them first before I ended their lives just for fun. But I reminded myself of Jeremy and if he was to hear what I did today or was about to do, he would've seen me in a different light and I didn't want that.
I scoffed and flipped my hair, before storming off from the bar with Kol tailing behind me. "Oh, shut up!" I snapped at him and he laughed.
"What? I wasn't going to say anything," he said. I glanced at him, seeing the cheeky smile still playing on his lips. "So tonight there's a party. You and I can have some fun later," he said with a wink. I narrowed my eyes at him. He wasn't asking me to a date, was he? Then I remembered.
"Right, I always forget that your idea of fun-"
"Is exactly like what you had in mind," Kol cut me off. "Trust me darling, just meet me later tonight. I'll text Jeremy the address," he said with a smirk and patted my cheek before leaving. I was stunned for a moment, watching him leave. Kol was too unpredictable. He could change from playful to angsty to serious any second he wanted. A smile escaped my lips and I headed home, already thinking of what to wear to tonight's party.
The party was just a block from our house. I was just done curling my hair when I frowned at my reflection. Since I was only expecting to spend some quality time with my brother, I didn't really pack any nice clothes for party. The skinny jeans and dark green tank top that I was wearing looked too simple. I suppressed a groan and rummaged through my luggage and pulled out a royal blue top and held it up to my body. I sighed in front of the mirror.
I knew damn well of this symtomps. I will only be really picky at what I wear when I was going to meet someone that I like. The last time I'd thrown a fit about not knowing what to wear was when I had a crush on my senior and he seemed to be into Elena. I rolled my eyes at the thought. Elena had always been stealing all my spotlights. I know it sounded so silly but ugh, she just like to take what was mine.
I shook my head, reasoning with myself. I don't actually like Kol. I like him but not with feelings and stuff. There was no way. I grinned to myself when I spotted my sleeveless red blouse, grateful that I brought it.
"Hmm is red too much?" I wondered aloud and shook my head. "Nah, it's perfect."
"Nessie! Hurry up!" Jeremy groaned, knocking my door loudly.
"Almost done!" I yelled and I could see him rolling his eyes even when there was a wooden door blocking my view.
"You said that like an hour ago."
"And now I'm almost done," I said, checking my reflection. I think I should do some shopping, buying more red for my closet.
"Just hurry up," Jeremy said. I quickly pulled my hair up, showing my neck just the way Kol liked it. "Kol is already there!" Jeremy said and I groaned when I heard him snickered. Jeremy knocked on my door rapidly before going downstairs. I rolled my eyes, and checked on my light makeup and put on my VS body mist. I didn't like the perfume because it was too strong, especially as a vampire. The body mist however, worked perfectly.
"Vanessa!" Jeremy shouted and I used my vampire speed and opened the door for him.
"You're so annoying," I said and he laughed.
"Oh god, who are you trying to seduce?" Jeremy asked and I shut my eyes in annoyance and also in embarrassment.
"Is it too much?" I asked and Jeremy doubled over, laughing. "I'll bite you," I hissed warningly at him and stormed out of the house, my vampire hearing can still pick up his laugh.
When we arrived, Kol was nowhere to be seen and I assumed he was upstairs. Jeremy introduced me to Mia, a girl that seemed to be having a crush on him and I just waited patiently hearing her talking for a couple of minutes before I excused myself for a drink.
"Hey, never seen you here before," a guy talked to me and I gave him a smile.
"Follow me upstairs," I said, sipping on the beer casually and his eyes widened before a smirk plastered on his lips.
"Bold," he commented and I rolled my eyes, smiling a little.
"Just trying to have some fun," I told him and he smirked, leading me upstairs. He checked for an empty room and locked the door before kissing me roughly. I let my fangs brushed his bottom lip, drawing blood and he hissed in pain. Smirking lightly, I let my vampire face showed, listening to his heart jumped and beat rapidly when he saw it.
"What the f-" I silenced him by compulsion, taking his wrist and bit into it. Then it took me a couple of seconds to realize there was another sweet scent of blood that wasn't coming from this guy. I frowned, opening the door to the bathroom and the blood scent got stronger. I gasped when I opened the connecting room, seeing a bunch of girls scattered around, half-dead or dead. I spotted Kol in the corner, drinking from a redhead.
"What the hell are you thinking?" I asked, flashing beside him and pulling him away from the girl. She was in daze and Kol growled before realizing it was me.
"Oh you're here. Sorry I started the party without you, darling. I was getting a little bit thirsty," he said cheekily. "You want a bite?" Kol asked before tilting his head to the side questioningly. He grabbed my jaw forcefully and kissed me hard. He always surprised me and I moaned into the kiss before he pulled away, clicking his tongue as he tasted some blood. "Seems like you already have one."
I shook my head, not wanting to get distracted by this vampire. "Did you forget about a bunch of people downstairs?" I asked him disbelievingly. "They could walk in here any moment!"
"And? I'll compel them. Oh wait, who are you to lecture me when you're doing the exact same thing?" Kol asked, raising his perfect eyebrow at me.
"It was just one guy!" I exclaimed and shook my head. "You're being careless. You can't just kill all these girls. Their parents will come looking for them!" Kol groaned before walking over to a beautiful black haired girl.
"And you're being Elijah, darling," he said, looking up to meet my eyes. His dark brown eyes were glinting with mischief and playfulness as usual. "It's not fun is it? Having to oppress your dark side because of your brother?" he taunted as the black veins under his eyes appeared and his eyes turned red.
I narrowed my eyes at him, crossing my arms. "What the hell does that mean?" I snapped.
"It means you can't have as much fun as you want. Not when you're constantly worrying of your brother judging you, of you not being the saint like your vampire friend or the good girl like your sister is," Kol said before sinking into the girl's neck. I watched, tranfixed at how Kol was savoring her blood, not hiding who he was at all. He pulled away, blood slightly smeared his chin and he motioned me to come towards him.
"I'll let you in on a little secret, darling." Kol propped the girl's head to the side, baring her untouched neck to me. "You're wasting your time being good when you're already bad in their eyes. Elena can kill someone and get away with it but trust me, things would have been different if it was you. Why bother of what they think when you can just unleash your dark side and have fun with it?"
"Why are you always trying to pull me to the dark side with you?" I asked, slightly laughing to pretend the lust for blood wasn't bothering me.
"You're already there, darling. I just wish to see your darkest side," he said, still smirking. He brought one hand to my face while the other was supporting the human girl, and Kol tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear, and ran his knuckles down my face gently. He tilted my chin up and I averted my eyes which were fixed on the girl's neck and found his eyes.
"No holding back, just let the vampire in you takes control. Don't think about Jeremy, your sister or anyone back in Mystic Falls that are always forcing you to repress your darkness," his husky British accented voice washed over me like soft breeze, seducing me to give in. "Just this time darling, when you feed, forget about everyone else." Kol cut the side of her neck opened with his nail, and I watched in fascination as the dark red liquid oozed out, glistening under the light.
"No holding back?" I asked him, my voice was small as if I was afraid.
"No holding back," he said. "When you're with me darling, you can be who you really are," he promised. With that, my fangs lowered and I sank them into the poor human's neck, closing my eyes and savoring the taste. It was like the first time I fed, euphoric. I noticed Kol had latched his mouth on her other side of the neck and I listened to her heartbeat slowed down before pulling away reluctantly. Kol let her body dropped and smirked before leaning down to kiss me hungrily.
True to his words, I didn't have to hide my dark side when I was with him. This was the first time in forever that I can actually just unleash hell on humans without being judged. When I was with Katherine, we did have some fun but not like this. She had always wanted to keep it quiet and not attract attention but Kol, he loved the attention. For the first time in forever I didn't have to think of those who would judge me, ie. Elena, Caroline, Jeremy, Stefan and those other sinners pretending to be saints.
I had fun. I was free. I was happy to be a vampire.
This kind of happiness was rare for me. I enjoyed being a vampire and I embraced it before but not like this. This time, it was different.
But of course my sister couldn't let me be happy because the world apparently revolved around her. She just had to ruin my life.
The next day after the party, I was running an errand for Mrs Anderson and was almost home for dinner when I was shoved against the wall unexpectantly. A painful moan escaped my lips as I heard the sound of my bone cracking. My eyes widened as I looked up to my attacker, only to meet Kol's dark brown eyes that were flaring in fury.
"What are you doing?" I asked, wincing in pain as his grips on my shoulders tightened. His hands were large, encasing my shoulders and it seemed like he could break and crush me if he wanted too.
"Finn is dead," he spoke slowly, letting the words sink in my mind. It took me a moment to remember who Finn was especially when the pain from his fingers digging into my flesh was clouding my mind. If I was human, there would certainly be purple black bruises forming. But just because I was a vampire, it didn't mean it didn't hurt. "My brother is dead," he said, this time harsher than before and I could hear how angry he was. The thing is, why was he taking it out on me?
"I'm sorry for your-"
"You and your wench of a sister! They killed him," he said. He wasn't screaming. Hell, I think it would be better if he screamed at me. He was containing his anger which made me feel worse. I didn't know he was close to Finn at all. He told me a couple of times that his relationship with his siblings was never that good. But then again, Finn was still his flesh and blood.
"Kol, I swear to you I know nothing of this," I said, finally finding my voice.
"Is that so?" Kol asked me mockingly and I gasped out loud when he wrapped his hands around my ribcage, just above my waist. I had worn corset only twice in my lifetime and this was worst. "Maybe I should break one of your ribs and stake Jeremy with it!" He growled and I tried to push him.
"Stop it!" I hit him hard and he slammed me against the wall again. I could hear the wall cracked and my head pounded. My back was aching but it was healing. I looked at Kol in fear, he was pinning my hands above my head, his eyes were burning through my soul. "Kol, please, I don't know anything about this. I didn't even contact them back in Mystic Falls!"
"Were you just waiting for me to let my guard down? And then were you going to stake me too?" He growled and I whimpered.
"No! Kol! Please!" I begged, shaking with fear. "I didn't know about anything that happened in Mystic Falls," I said, pleading into his eyes. His dark brown eyes seemed darker but they were glassy and flared with mixed emotions. He felt betrayed by me and I felt terrible. If I had actually betrayed him, then maybe I could feel guilty but I didn't even know what was happenng. I let out a scream when I saw his fist coming and then there was silence. Kol was gone and I glanced at the hole next to my face, knowing that if Kol wanted to hit me he would have done so. I breathed heavily before sliding down to the ground, still shaking. Then I remembered Jeremy and my heart dropped in terror as I dashed to our house. I let out a sigh of relief as I heard Jeremy upstairs in his room and bumped into Mrs. Anderson.
"Oh dear, are you alright?" she asked concerned. I gave her a smile, although I knew she could see through it.
"I'm fine," I said and wished her goodnight, telling her I was tired. There was no way in hell I was sleeping tonight. Kol's dark eyes that were filled with betrayal will haunt me forever. It wasn't easy for him to trust me but after spending time together, we weren't strangers. He had opened up a little bit and perhaps now he thought everything was a mistake.
That I couldn't be trusted. That I, like his siblings had betrayed him.