Accepting Chapter 21

A/N: OH MMY GOD THERES OVER 110 REVIEWS AND LIKE 20,000 VIEWS HOW DID I DESERVE ALL THIS IM NOT THE BAD BOY AUTHOR I DON'T MAKE STORIES THAT ARE AMAZING LIKE HERS. SERIOUSLY. HOW?! BUT AHHHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH YOU ARE ALL WONDERFUL PEOPLE (expect for you 4 anons who hate deztin you can get out).

ANYWAYS ENJOYYYYYY

No One's POV (Austin)

He patiently waited under the tree it got dark. His heart clenched. His eyes became glossy. She never came. He should have known. He sighed as he eyed the empty park. There were a few couples walking around under the moon light.

He frowned. They were so happy and in love. And he's sad and miserable. And it's all his fault. He decided it was no longer Dez's fault. It was all his. It was always his.

He got up from under the tree and walked to his car. The ride was quiet and empty. He didn't turn on the radio. All that was heard was his choppy breathes. He bit his lip when he came home. He glanced at her house.

The windows were open. He can see her holding him. She had a tired smile on her lips. He could tell she was truly happy. She doesn't need him. She's got her own happiness.

For some reason. He smiled. However, it wasn't a happy smile. It was more of a sad and broken smile. It was that smile you'd give to someone when you're upset but don't wanna show it.

He doesn't remember the last time he smiled a real genuine happy smile. It has been two weeks since he was ever with Ally. Guess he just has to accept she doesn't like him anymore.

Being hung up on a girl isn't healthy. But in Austin's case, he's in love. He doesn't know how to get out. Does he want to get out? Not really. Should he get out? Yeah probably.

Ya know, accepting is one of the hardest things for Austin. He can't be accepted. He won't accept anyone. But it's not his fault.

It's just who he is. And his past is what made accepting hard. He was so close to having someone accept him but he let her slip away. And it's his fault.

Sighing, he trudged himself to the front door. Reaching for his keys, his eyes widen when he felt nothing but his empty pocket. He peered out the window and saw them on the table. His mom wasn't home so the only way to get inside was through the back doors. So he ran through the backyard. Then, he stepped on something. It was too small for it to be a rock. And too smooth for it to be one too.

He removed his foot and picked up the object. Once he got a good look at it, his heart dropped to the center of the Earth. It was the necklace he sent Ally. The necklace she had begged for weeks and he had bought just for her the day before they broke up.

Instead of being around her neck, it was in his backyard, collecting dirt. The tears had came up again as he clenched the charm in his fist. It was hopeless. Nothing could ever bring Ally back to his arms.

No. She's happy. You have to move on Austin. He heard his conscience say.

But I can't. I love her. He argued back.

Yeah. It was hopeless.

All he wants is her.

But you can't always have what you want.

Can you?

Next morning.

He hadn't slept all night. He kept tossing and turning. His heart still ached. His head hurt. He felt sore all over.

Oh. And he has school.

Fun.

Which means he'll see Ally.

Again. Fun.

And her boyfriend.

Even more fun.

But at least it was Friday.

He can't call in sick since he doesn't know the school's hotline, which sucks. Luckily, he's close with the school nurse after visiting her a couple times through out the past three years.

So he can always fake it. Go home early, and not have to deal with her for another day. Yeah. That sounds like a good plan.

So when he got to school that morning, everyone's, and he means everyone's eyes were staring at him. Blinking dumbly at them, he walked to his locker. Eyes still on him. He took out his books. Everyone was still staring.

Once he was done, he stared back at everyone. He glanced at their eyes, no emotion was shown. He glared.

"What?!" He screamed.

Everyone was taken back by the sudden noise, considering it was quiet the whole time.

Then, someone stepped out. He didn't recognize the kid but he did know this must be one brave kid. As the kid walked closer, he was visibly shaking with fear. Once he has reached Austin, he handed him a slip of paper and zipped away without another glance.

Austin's eyes followed the paper in his hand. He carefully opened the paper read what was there.

In neat and beautiful handwriting, was a note that wasn't so beautiful.

Fuck you.

He frowned. Not only had someone taken the time to write just a note, but the fact he recognized the handwriting made it worse. He crumbled the note in his hand and stormed off. He said he wasn't going to interact with her but something just screamed at him to confront her.

And that's exactly was he did.

He stalked her as she put her books in her locker. Deciding not to waste time, he marched over, slammed the locker shut which made her jump in surprise.

"What is your problem?! Look, I understand you hate me but you didn't have to go and pull a stunt like that!" He got straight to the point. He wasn't going to sugar coat. Even to her.

"What's my problem?! Look pal I went through hell for the past two and a half months! I had to deal with the fact I was cheated on, I had a boyfriend who only dated me out of pity! You think you got problems?! I have scars Austin!" Ally scowled.

"Well I had to do with the fact that NO ONE LOVES ME ANYMORE!" He didn't yell this. But it was loud enough for Ally and anyone within a three foot radius to hear. But mostly Ally.

Not only was Ally taken back, but the fact he admitted it to someone other than himself (And Dez) was a bit of a shocker. Then Ally's eyes darted the hallways to see if anyone did anything. Once she stopped, she grabbed his arm and dragged him out of the hall. He had no idea where they were heading, but he had a feeling it was somewhere so they can be alone.

Sure enough, it was. Only she made sure the halls were clear, she stepped closer to him. She continued until their faces were inches away. Thinking she was gonna kiss him, Austin closed his eyes and slightly puckered his lips.

But instead of her soft lips on his, his cheek was met with a sharp pain. His eyes shot up open and his hand held his cheek in pain. He stared at her with wide eyes wondering what the fuck just happened.

"What the hell?!" He hissed.

"If you honestly think I was gonna kiss you, you have another thing coming for you buddy."

He frowned as he continued to rub his throbbing cheek. After a moment he sighed as he slid down the wall until he was met with the floor.

After a good solid two minutes of silence, Austin spoke up in a soft whisper, "Why can't you forgive me? I apologized, I told you what happened. Why can you accept my apology?"

She was silent. She honestly didn't know what to say. It made him nervous that she was gonna yell at him again.

Another minute passed before she said,

"Trust." The one worded statement confused him, so he waited to see if she said more. And she did.

"I built so much trust with people over the years. Each and every one of them broke my walls only to betray me. When you cheated on me, my only instinct was to run. Run as far away away from you as possible. Obviously I couldn't since you live next door. So I proved myself I could move on. Which was why I got a new boyfriend so quickly. I wanted to prove I had no feelings for you. It wasn't the case. All I wanted was you. But you broke my trust. So I forced myself in this uncomfortable state just to prove otherwise. So I moved on as quickly as I could even though I didn't want to."

It was a lot to take in, but he understood. They were both hurting. They both tried to move on. They both failed. They weren't any better. He tells her he wants a second chance, but the past two months had made him realize it's okay. He understands if she doesn't want to get back together.

She says it's okay. She's still iffy if she wants to back together. She takes her eyes off him and turns them to the ground.

"If it makes you feel better, I still like you. But not in that way. More as a friend really." She whispered.

"I know. I always known."

"If you knew, then why didn't you say anything?"

"I wanted you to realize it for yourself. I wasn't gonna force you to reveal your own feelings." Austin responded quietly. "Wait. What about your boyfriend?"

"We broke it off last night. It was a mutual break up however. We just weren't right for each other." She mumbled.

"Oh."

"Yep." She said, popping the p.

But before he speak up, she cut him off.

"But we're not getting back together. You cheated on me. I-I... I can't ever forgive someone who cheated on me."

And just like that, his chances completely flushed down the drain. Again.

Afterwards silence flushed over them. But only for a moment before the warning bell rang through the halls, indicating they had to get to class soon. Sharing one last glance, they went their separate ways. Both of them knowing they have a lot to talk about later.

They crossed paths many times throughout the day but sharing nothing more than glances. He was still upset. All his hopes for them getting back together flushed down the drain. But he should know better. No one forgives a cheater.

He does enjoy her company after all. So having her as a friend wouldn't be the worst thing ever. But not having to kiss or hold her in ways he would like sucks pretty bad. It just breaks his heart knowing it was his fault.

The bell rang and he bolted out of the classroom as soon as he got to the door. Running down the stairs, he made his way to the back entrance, his heart pacing. Not because of the running, but because of the anxiety that's taking over him. He was extremely nervous and this talk could go in so many directions. He was going insane just thinking about them.

He finally made it to the side of the school. Unfortunately, Ally was already there, so he had no time to think about what he going to say.

This talk is going to go so bad... He thought miserably.

"H-Hey..." Ally greeted shakily.

She was nervous too. Yup. This is gonna be bad.

"Okay. This is it. Everything we held back for the past two months is gonna be let free." He said.

"Who goes first?" She asked timidly.

He didn't think about that. "I don't know. You?" He suggested. He didn't want Ally to go first. But he feels she has everything planned out for herself. Unlike him. Who on the other hand, has all their thoughts jumbled up and can't get things in order.

"Okay... So. The past two months haven't been the best- even though it may seem like that from a another perspective. I was so focused on shutting you out I didn't realize I was putting my own happiness at risk. It was already too late by the time I saw it so I forced myself to be happy. I liked my boyfriend. I really did. But it didn't feel I wanted to be with him. It was more along the lines of being with him because I had to. And to prove I didn't need you, I... burned away your gifts..."

"So you burned my gifts just to prove point?" He whispered as his voice cracked.

"I did. I'm so sorry Austin. I was angry, upset, frustrated... I didn't know what I was doing. And it kinda explains why I said I have scars earlier."

"I found the necklace in the backyard the other day. The one you always wanted. I was gonna give it to you. But apparently it wants to hang out in my backyard..." He said sighing.

"Remember. We can't get back together."

Right. He forgot about that for a moment.

"Yeah."

A moment passed. Then she spoke up.

"Austin..." She started before she got cut off.

"Ally?"

"Mhm?"

"If that day never happened, why would you break up with me? Just hypothetically."

"Hypothetically?"

"Yeah."

A another moment passed.

"How about you go first." She insisted.

He never really thought about breaking up with her. So after about a minute, he came to an answer. "Okay. If hypothetically I were to break up with you it's because... You're kinda selfish." It hurt to say that but despite how he feels towards her, it was true.

"What?" She asked astounded.

"You want what's best for you. You hardly care for others. You didn't think twice when you chose to study for a test instead of being with your friends, you never looked back that day you broke up with me. Did you even know what day it when it happened?"

"Uh... Thursday?"

"No." He sighed. "It was our one month anniversary."

"I forgot." She answered shamefully.

"Course you did. Your turn." He spat.

"Hey!" All he did was give her a cold look. So she resorted back to thinking of her answer.

"Um... If I were to hypothetically break up with you... It's because... You're... You're too sweet." As she said that, his heart sank.

"What?" It was his turn to be astound.

"You do everything for me. You get me all these amazing things and do these amazing things and you always treat me like a princess. You're always willing to put for yourself down just to make me happy. And I hardly did anything for you. I felt so guilty because I didn't deserve any of this. I didn't know why your wasted all your precious time and money on someone who didn't do anything back."

"So being sweet is bad?"

"Y-Yeah... Sometimes." She admitted lowly.

"Wow." Was all he said. "I never knew you felt that way about me." Readjusting his backpack, he turned around and started walking away. He can't believe she feels that way.

"Hey hey where you going?" She called running towards him.

"Isn't obvious? I'm going somewhere where being nice is a good thing." He snapped. Before he went any further, he said, "If you really don't like me, then look me in the eyes. Tell me. Tell me you don't like me."

Turning around to face her, she look at him dead in the eye. His eyes held no emotion. It was stone cold. Swallowing, she harden her look before speaking.

"I don't love you." She was still looking at him in the eye. Love. That hit him hard.

He stood for a moment. His mind processed exactly what she had said. His eyes broke from hers. Needless to say, he was merely satisfied. He wasn't ready to accept his fate so satisfaction was all he could give at the moment.

"Okay. Fair enough. I'll be on my way then." He replied with his voice nearly cracking.

All she had given him was a nod.

And then he left.

A/N: okay what was this. cause idk. i hope you liked it and r&r and thank you again for your support -gives you all a cookie-

Later!

~BNYC