3: Trust
Riley woke up on the first day of the new year to a pounding in her head, which sounded awfully similar to how Maya usually knocked on her bay window when it was locked…
Wait a minute – Maya!
Riley jolted up in her bed at the sudden realization and looked towards the window where her best friend was indeed, crouched on her knees and rapping mercilessly against the glass, trying to wake her up.
"Coming!" Riley called, throwing her blanket aside as she slid off the bed in her blue pyjamas.
She had been expecting Maya's arrival since last night, but definitely not this early in the morning. It was only when she unlocked the window and pushed it open that she found out she had slept way past her alarm. The sun was hanging high in the sky, its rays shining brightly even during wintertime, causing her to be blinded for a second.
"What time is it?" Riley asked, rubbing her eyes as she made way for Maya to climb through the window.
"Oh baby doll," Maya crooned, making herself comfortable on the window seat. "Was last night so horrid that you had to sleep in till 2 in the afternoon?"
Riley plopped down beside her best friend and sighed. "I can't believe I slept for so long! Why didn't mum and dad wake me up? I'm pretty sure I'd set my alarm at 9."
Maya laughed, cupping Riley's chin and turning her head towards the clock that laid broken on the floor at the other side of the room. "I guess you got annoyed and threw it across the room," she shrugged, unable to contain her smile.
Riley chewed on her bottom lip. She must've had woken up feeling so grumpy that the very thought of getting out of bed frustrated her. And as the past day's events replayed in her mind, she was finally reminded why. The embarrassment, anger, confusion and hurt – it had all been too overwhelming for her to handle. It still was. She wanted to return to her bed and snuggle under the blanket where no one else could see her.
"Why are you here, Maya?" she groaned, grabbing a pillow and wrapping it around her head, exasperated. The day hadn't even started for her and she was already tired.
Maya's smile faded, her face turning into one of seriousness. "I'm here to talk to you about last night. Lucas wanted to come too, but I knew you wouldn't be comfortable with that so I made him wait downstairs."
Riley turned to face Maya as she sucked in a deep breath. "There's nothing to discuss here, Maya. I made it clear weeks ago that I view Lucas as a brother. The two of you should be together. Please don't let me get in the way."
"That's not how Farkle made it sound like."
There was a hint of bitterness in Maya's voice as she said it, and Riley couldn't help but wonder if Farkle truly knew the damage he had done to the entire group's dynamics. She knew she'd left him hanging the night before by refusing to accept his apology, but honestly speaking, she didn't think he actually meant it. The worst part was probably the fact that he didn't really believe that he did anything wrong.
With this in mind, Riley decided that lying was only going to make it worse. "Okay fine," she relented. "Maybe I'm still unsure about my feelings for Lucas but I'm so confused it doesn't matter anyway."
Maya slung an arm around Riley's neck and gently laid the brunette's head down on her shoulder, gently stroking her hair. "I know, honey. That's why we've decided to just stay as friends."
Riley couldn't muster the energy to lift her head off Maya's shoulder, so she stayed there, staring ahead into thin air. "Who's we?" she mumbled.
"Lucas and I. And now, you."
The very thought of Maya sacrificing her own feelings for Riley yet again caused another pang of guilt to strike her heart. It wasn't fair that her best friend always had to be the one to give in and be the bigger person in their friendship. She already owed Maya so much.
"But Maya!" She protested, sitting back up and looking into her friend's steely blue eyes. "Lucas and you like each other. And it's not okay for the both of you to suppress your feelings just for me. I won't let that happen."
"It's our decision, Riley. After what Farkle did, you of all people should understand the importance of having a choice. Besides, Lucas still isn't sure of what he wants and I think it would be best if everyone just stayed friends."
Riley studied Maya, trying to source for any signs of regret or disappointment in her decision. But there was none, and once Maya was certain about something, there was a slim chance of anyone ever changing her mind. "Alright," she sighed. "We'll take a break from this mess for now. But you know we can't hide our feelings forever, right?"
"That's why I won't," Maya smiled, taking Riley's hand and giving it a tight squeeze. "I love you, Riley Matthews."
Riley's brain suddenly went on red-alert when she heard the words 'I love you'. It suddenly reminded her of the time Farkle said it to her at Topanga's after trying to help her sort out her feelings. She shook her head, trying to forget the weird sensation that came along with it. She was supposed to be angry with Farkle, not reminisce about their friendship. But somehow she still couldn't help but feel bad for refusing to reply him last night.
"Bloody Farkle," she muttered under her breath, much to Maya's amusement.
"What did you say?" Maya laughed. "Here I am confessing my love for you and you're thinking about 'bloody Farkle'?"
Riley buried her head in her hands, groaning. "I don't know, Maya. I'm just so tired. One part of me hates Farkle for revealing my secret but another part of me still loves him all the same."
Maya stood up from the seat and dug her hands into her pocket. "You should try and hear him out," she advised. "Whatever the outcome has been, I'm sure his intentions were good. And he's still our best friend. He wouldn't have done it if he knew you'd get hurt."
"New year, new Maya?" Riley teased, slightly in awe of her friend's sudden unabashed show of maturity. She would usually joke around about such things, maybe even suggest that Riley hunt Farkle down and hold his favourite telescope hostage.
Maya shrugged, heading towards the bedroom door. She opened it just enough such that Topanga's voice could float in from the living room outside:
"Would you like to stay for lunch, Ava?"
"I guess people change people," Maya finally replied, grinning. "Come out soon, Riles. Your mum's spaghetti smells unusually appetising today."
The moment Maya stepped out of Riley's apartment building smelling of spaghetti and meatballs, Lucas rushed over to her, eyebrows knitted together in a tight frown.
"What took you so long?" He demanded. "It's freezing out today!" Then, in a softer tone, "how's Riley?"
Maya laughed at the sight of Lucas rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet, his sorry attempt to keep warm. "No one asked you to wait out here the whole time, cowboy. And to answer your question, she's fine. Still a little angry with Farkle, but I'm sure they'll sort it out."
"And what about the truce?" he prodded.
"She agreed to it," Maya replied, dragging Lucas along by the sleeve. It was only seconds later that she realized what she was doing, and quickly let go.
The boy nodded, the right side of his lips tugged up into a smile. "That's good to hear. I'd hate for all of us to start the new year on bad terms with each other."
The two continued to stroll aimlessly along the path. It was only past three and the sky was already beginning to darken. Maya secretly hoped that there would be a nice sunset for her to paint by the time she got home. A sunset for an end to the pain and trouble of the past year. And tomorrow morning, a sunrise to symbolize renewal and hope for the coming months.
When they finally stopped at the entrance of the subway, Maya turned to face Lucas. "Thanks for accompanying me today," she said, letting out a smile.
Lucas looked like he was about to comment on her lack of snark today, but was quickly cut off by the girl's sudden addition.
"– even though you were completely useless as usual."
Lucas couldn't help but break into a grin upon hearing the insult. "There's the Maya I know," he chuckled affectionately.
Maya laughed and took a few steps back, waving goodbye to the boy she kind of, sort of, still had feelings for.
"And there goes the girl you know," she commentated, running down the steps and disappearing into the hustle and bustle of the New Year crowd.
Riley literally spent the entire first day of the new year at home, helping Topanga out with the chores and playing with Auggie and Ava. They made her the evil witch, while Auggie played the part of prince charming and Ava, the strong-headed and stubborn princess.
By the time they were done play-acting, Riley was thoroughly exhausted and ready for sleep, flopping back down onto her bed with the pointy witch's hat still stuck to her head. As tired as she was, Riley was grateful for the distraction. She still wasn't entirely sure of what she should say to Farkle, or what she should do. In fact, all the worrying did was give her a pounding headache.
Riley was just about to close the curtains and change into her pyjamas when she heard the sound of clanging metal from outside her window.
It was pitch black outside, and her heart began to race as she grabbed the nearest weapon she could find – one of Lucas' poor discarded shoes from whenever her father chased him out the window.
Arms poised and ready to attack, the girl inched slowly towards the open window. A cold draft could be felt from where she stood, and a little shiver creeped up the back of her spine. She made a mental note to stop forgetting to close the window whenever she left the room.
"Riley!" A face suddenly appeared in the window, scaring the girl and causing her to instinctively reach out and attack the intruder with her shoe.
"Go. Away! Don't you dare hurt me or my family!" She said through gritted teeth in-between her strikes.
"Riley – no, wait, it's me!"
Riley's hand froze mid-attack when she realized who it was. His hair was currently a floppy mess due to her attack, no doubt, and his arms were raised protectively in front of him. He was donned in a black space shirt, jacket and jeans, which was probably why the boy managed to blend into the night so well.
"Farkle?" Riley gasped, rushing forward to help him through the window. "I'm so sorry, I didn't know it was you!"
Farkle smiled sheepishly as he stood in the middle of the room. "Ta-da?" He did an awkward flourish with his hands.
"What's with everybody sneaking into my room today?" Riley questioned. "Why couldn't you just enter through the front door?"
"Well, I tried. But I guess Mr Matthews found out about what I'd done and chased me away."
Riley strode towards her bed and sat down, crossing her tingling arms and legs as the sudden flurry of the situation dissipated. "Why am I not surprised?" She asked, before immediately regretting what she'd said. She recalled what Maya had told her just a few hours ago:
"Whatever the outcome has been, I'm sure his intentions were good. And he's still our best friend. He wouldn't have done it if he knew you'd get hurt."
She studied Farkle's face – the droop of his eyebrows, the hurt in his eyes. His lips were slightly parted, as if he wanted to say something but was holding back because he was wary of making another mistake.
Riley was surprised by how significantly softer and gentler her voice was when she said, "I'm asking again – why did you do that, Farkle?"
"All I wanted was for you to be happy, Riley," the boy explained, his gaze sharp and piercing as he met her eyes. "After what happened in Texas, you looked so down and confused I couldn't take it any longer."
"Couldn't take what any longer?" Riley's words barely came out as a whisper.
The atmosphere suddenly seemed tensed, and despite the chilly winter drafts that entered through the half-closed window, the air felt thick and warm. Riley could feel her pulse jumping at a quickening rate as she continued to hold Farkle's gaze steady.
Farkle, looking as uncomfortable as she did, gulped, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down. And just like that, the intensity of the moment faded away as quickly as it came.
Managing to recollect his senses, Farkle finally said, "I missed my sunshine."
Riley pressed her lips into a tight smile and pointed to herself. "Sunshine's still here."
The boy rolled his eyes. "You know what I mean, Riles."
And she did. She knew she wasn't as smiley and happy as she used to be. The past year had been hard on her, and that made it increasingly difficult for her to find the light in the dark. She took a deep breath. It was time for her to explain her side of the story.
"I was angry with you because you didn't give me a choice in the matter. And because of that, your friends' feelings were hurt last night, Farkle," Riley said. "Lucas, Maya, mine…and after finding out that Maya had hid and sacrificed her own feelings for mine all this time, I just owe it to her that she find her happiness too."
A look of defeat crossed Farkle's face. "At the expense of yours?" he asked.
Riley tucked her hair behind her ears, slowly processing what he'd implied.
"I…I guess it's called trust," she looked up at Farkle, smiling as she finally found the word she'd been looking for. "Trust that I'll be able to handle it my way."
Farkle took one step closer towards the bed, and then another, before taking a seat beside Riley. "I understand," he said. "It's just that you were always the one who looked out for me all these years. I felt that it was my turn to return the favour."
A mutual misunderstanding, with both sides harbouring only good intentions for one another.
Riley placed a hand over Farkle's own and casted him a smile. "I'm a big girl now, Farkle. You don't need to look out for me. I can handle this by myself."
A flicker of doubt seemed to pass Farkle's face for a moment, but then he smiled back.
"Okay, Riley. I trust you."
Riley only ever thought that the word 'love' could evoke such warmth and comfort inside her, but that cold winter's night, something else did.
A/N: Hello again! Thanks for all the follows and reviews so far, I really really appreciate them! :') Unfortunately, I think the website is undergoing some sort of glitch? I received emails saying that I've gotten three reviews so far but I can only see one :o Hopefully the problem gets fixed soon! I heard it happens quite often. But anyway, I hope that all of you have been having a great 2016 thus far! You've probably already noticed, but just to reiterate, the main focus of this chapter is about trust. I feel like Farkle has had one of the biggest growth arc across this season of GMW, and yet, he still seems to have so much room to grow it's kind of amazing, really. In my opinion, one of the more subtle reasons why he revealed Riley's secret on NYE was probably because he didn't trust her enough to be able to resolve the issue by herself, which was why I decided to tackle this aspect of it in the chapter. Also, you got to see more Lucas and Maya too, so yay, there'll definitely be more of them to come. I start my work internship tomorrow, and it's a 9 to 6 job so hopefully I'll be able to update soon. Fret not though, the next chapter will be up latest by the end of the week! See you then, my lovelies and have a great week ahead! (Reviews would make my day, hehe).