A/N: It's going to take a few months, but there will eventually be some artwork to go with this story. Links will be posted in my profile as they become available. Speaking of which, if any of you are curious about my plot bunnies for future fics, there's a brief summary of four of them there. :)

IlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlI

"What. The heck. Is that?" Clarke asked, looking at the thing swimming in the water.

"Koi." Lexa said absently, building a fire in what remained of a fireplace.

They were in the skeletal remains of a mansion. The roof and upper floors were gone, lost to the ravages of war and time, but parts of the walls on the main floor still remained. The floor had caved in at some point, revealing an underground river going through what had once been a basement. A river filled with an abundance of glowing orange and white things, which were definitely not fish in Clarke's book.

"No, those are koi. Those are something else." Clarke said, pointing at the water.

Finished with her task, Lexa came up beside her. "Nope, still koi."

"They don't look like koi."

"They're koi."

"They don't swim like the other koi."

"Still koi."

Clarke tilted her head. "They kinda look like mermaids."

"They're... Wait. What are mermaids?"

"You know, mermaids. Mythical creatures that look like gorgeous woman, only with fish tails instead of legs?"

Lexa looked at one of the creatures. "You think that resembles a beautiful woman?"

"Well... No, not really. But I mean, look at it!"

Lexa did.

The creature Clarke had pointed out swam past them close to the surface of the water. Its glowing body had the orange, black, and white patches that were common for its kind, but that was where the resemblance ended. Its long tail broke off into two narrow fins which trailed in the water behind it, each ending with a bone spike. The pectoral fins were also long, Arm like almost, ending in webbed hands tipped with sharp points of bone. The alleged koi turned over in the water, allowing them to briefly see its face. Black eyes looked up at them. The mouth opened revealing rows of sharp teeth before it rolled over again, turning to swim away from them.

Clarke looked at Lexa expectantly.

"It's still a koi."

Clarke sighed, giving up. "Compromise? They aren't mermaids, but they are most definitely not just koi. Mirkoi."

The mirkoi turned in the water, swimming straight towards them at an accelerated pace. Clarke watched it, curious about what it was going to do. She gasped when Lexa suddenly tackled her to the ground, the bone spike of the tail fin striking the air where she had been standing moments before. The spike dissappeared as the mirkoi swam away, disappearing in the swarm of glowing bodies below.

"What the heck was that?!" She blurted.

"Koi." Lexa said calmly. "Are you alright?"

Clarke looked up at her. Stars, she's beautiful. She wants nothing more than to kiss her in that moment, but her words from earlier stop her. She said that this, whatever this is, cannot last. Not without an alliance. But what can I offer them? A lock of Anya's hair? Somehow I doubt that that's going to cut it. She considered telling her about Mount Weather, the horror that awaited both their people there, but almost immediately discarded the notion. We need this alliance, for both our people. But without an offering... Something caught her eye, a hint of movement by the water. Instinctively she rolled, bringing Lexa with her as the bone spike returned, landing inches beside them.

She looked down at Lexa. "Fine. Are you alright?"

Clarke pretended not to notice when Lexa looked up at her a second longer than necessary, avoiding her attempt at making eye contact for fear that her resolve would break. She couldn't allow herself to kiss the woman. Not again. To kiss would be to allow herself to hope, and hope has never led to anything other than disappointment. And there would be disappointment. Even if I can find a way to forge an alliance, Lexa is the commander, she could have a different woman in her bed every night if she chose to. Women who are strong, brave, beautiful... Women who have something to offer. Not like me. She swallows back the bitterness invoked by her thoughts, being mindful not to let it show in her face as she waited for Lexa's answer.

Lexa appeared to give up on making eye contact. "I am well."

Clarke nodded. She stood up, offering her hand to Lexa, who accepted it. She pulled the woman to her feet, then looked over to the water. "I though koi were non aggressive?"

"They are now." Lexa told her, looking over at the water. "They are also meat eaters. Their skin is covered with a protective oil that acts as a hallucinogen when ingested, and those spikes are also covered. It's how they hunt. When an animal gets close to the water, they strike it with a barb and wait for the hallucinating animal to fall in. The animal drowns, and they eat. If one of them is eaten, the predator drowns and the rest of them get to eat. They are very efficient hunters."

Lexa's lips twitched in remembered amusement. "My friend was struck once. She spent nearly a candlemark swinging a stick at the grass. She said she was looking for rupees of all things."

"What are rupees?"

Lexa shook her head. "I have no idea."

Clarke, noticing how closely they were standing together, stepped back, feigning caution.

Lexa glanced back at her. "It's ok, we are out of range."

Clarke remembered one of her mothers favourite sayings. "It's better to be over cautious than over reckless." She glanced at the fire. "What's the fire for?"

Lexa smiled. "Cooking. The fully grown koi may be hallucinogenic, but the adolescents are delicious." She walked over to the wall, returning with a spear tied to a length of rope. "Watch yourself. They tend to throw back. You may want to stand by the wall... Their aim is quite good, considering."

Clarke heeded the advice, going to stand by the wall farthest from the fire. She watched in rapid interest as Lexa threw the spear, only to have it be caught in midair by one of the mirkoi and thrown back mid flip. They lobbed the spear back and forth, dodging, grabbing, and throwing, in the deadliest game of catch Clarke had ever seen. Finally, Lexa broke through their guard, spearing one of the smaller fish in their midst. Quickly she pulled on the line, bringing it to the surface before one of the gaping maws could steal their meal.

"That was awesome!" Clarke called, clapping her hands appreciatively.

Lexa smiled over her shoulder as she gathered the line into a neat loop over arm. She hoisted the spear, a two foot long fish hanging limply part way down it. She motioned for Clarke to follow her to the fire.

At her approach, Lexa removed the fish from the spear, allowing Clarke a better view of their meal. The fish was glowing dimly now, the glow fading away with the fishes life. Clarke estimated it to be on the edge of adulthood, the tail only just starting to split, the webbed hands still close to the body. Its bone spikes were only nubs, covered by a layer of skin.

Lexa glanced at her. "Do you know how to prepare it?"

Clarke shook her head.

"Then you will learn."

Lexa took out her dagger, showing Clarke how to efficiently remove the head, fins, and scales, without injuring herself. She removed the innards and bones then left briefly, returning with a couple of large leaves. She wrapped the meat in the leaves, then placed them in the fire to cook. She took the remains and disposed of them in the lake, stating that this was to give their thanks to nature for their meal.

"Are you sure you're not just rubbing it in?" Clarke teased.

"Well, there is that." Lexa acknowledged, a slight smirk playing at her lips.

She picked up a bucket and filled it with water from the lake, dodging the barbs of two of the mirkoi with ease. She brought it over to the fire and used the water to cleanse her hands. Shaking the water off, she sat in front of the fire and motioned for Clarke to join her.

She did so cautiously, leaving a respectful gap between them.

Lexa sighed. "Something is bothering you. Tell me."

Clarke hid a wince, not having realized that she had been that obvious. "Nothing."

Lexa glanced at her. "Speak true."

Clarke shifted uncomfortably. "Nothing is bothering me. Really."

The distance between them disappeared. Lexa had lunged, pushing Clarke onto her back and pinning her head between her arms, her legs between her own. Clarke had no option but to look in her eyes, soul laid bare once again. "Lexa... Don't."

"Don't shut me out. Not after I've waited so long to let someone in. Please."

Lexa's eyes pleaded with her, looking as if... As if she were afraid of losing somebody precious. Like mom looked when dad said he was going to tell everyone about the air. But why? I'm nothing to her. Doubt warred with the hope she had strived to suppress. So why is she giving me that look?

She scoffed at the thought born from her foolish hope, pushing it back ruthlessly. Laughing softly at herself, she looked through Lexa as she answered, uncaring about the bitterness in her voice. "What do you mean you waited so long?" She raised her hand, tucking a stray lock of brown hair behind Lexa's ear. "You're beautiful. You could have anyone, a different someone every night if you chose, so why would you wait for me? You barely know me and besides, look at me. I'm nothing special, and I have nothing to offer. So why?"

Understanding flashed in Lexa's eyes. Her look turned thoughtful, her focus mercifully turning away from Clarke as it shifted inward.

Clarke waited, allowing Lexa time to gather her thoughts. Her hope an ever present pain in her chest she struggled to ignore.

The fire continued burning next to them, bathing them in its glow. Clarke noticed something, a hint of movement across the night sky, and looked just in time to see one of the mirkoi leap from the water and stab the bird with one of its spikes. A splash sounded mere heartbeats later, its fight over.

Fingers ghosted across her face, bringing her eyes to Lexa's gentle ones once more. "I don't know."

Clarke nodded, hope giving way to disappointment, as she had known it would. She started to rise. Lexa's weight stopped her. "Lexa..."

"Clarke, wait. Please?"

Clarke did not want to wait around to hear her out. She wanted to get up, leave, find somewhere to cry, fight, scream, hurt, lick her wounds in privacy and maybe find peace. To run away again or maybe this time ride away on Naveen. But those eyes... There they were with that damned look again, that compassionate look that had been her undoing in the tent just a few hours before. That look that says I care about you and your mask doesn't hide a thing. Damn her eyes... She wanted to run. She waited instead.

"I don't know why you are special to me. I barely know you, it's true. I only know that you are. As commander, I could have any woman I want, but I don't want any of them and I haven't in a very long time. It has been three seasons since my last relationship ended, and I have not wanted anyone since... Until you."

Hope rose back in her chest. She tried pushing it back, but she was quickly losing the willpower to fight it. "But I thought... After tonight..."

Sympathy mingled with regret in Lexa's eyes even as a gentle smile crossed her lips. "As things are now, yes. However." Her hands moved to cradle Clarke's face between them. "If there is one thing I've learned about you, from what I have seen with my own eyes and witnessed through my soldiers reports, it is this. You are strong, Clarke of the Sky People. When things are impossible, you shine bright and you find a way. I have no doubt that this will be any different."

"When you said that you wanted this to last, you meant it, didn't you?" Clarke asked, looking up at Lexa in wonder. "I admit, I didn't believe it. Not wholly. But you do. You really do."

Lexa's eyes searched hers. A thumb brushed over her lips. "The question is, do you?"

Did she? Lexa was a stranger. Was recently her captor. She sees the me behind the mask, even when I fail to see myself. She had introduced her to Naveen and taught her how to ride. She had taken her safely through the forest on a path of butterflies and crimson. She had drawn for her, and in doing so drew her out. Clarke had dragged her into making angels, but she was the one who made them dance in the heavens. She gave me back my dreams, and makes me want to have them. She made her feel hope, and belatedly Clarke realized she had lost the will to fight it. She smiled at Lexa and reached up to grab the woman by the back of her head, pulling her into a fiercely passionate kiss.

Breaking away, she brought Lexa's head to her own, a mirror of how Lexa had stood with her in the pavilion before. She smiled. "Does that answer your question?"

Lexa looked at her for a moment, then slowly smiled in return.

It was impossible. It was completely, hopelessly, totally, impossible. Clarke knew this. But beneath that knowledge was a new resolve backed by an infamous determination.

I can do this. I will find a way.

IlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlI

Lexa used a forked tree branch to remove the wrapped fish from the fire. After allowing the four packages to cool for a while on the cold stone she unwrapped them, giving two to Clarke. "Eat. What little you ate in the cell must be long gone by now."

She saw the hesitation in Clarke's eyes. "Don't worry, fish looks and smells different from red meat. Try it and you'll see." She hastened to assure her.

Clarke still looked doubtful, but she nodded, taking the meat. Cautiously, she smelled it first. When this failed to make her ill, she took a tentative bite. Her eyes widened. Suddenly ravenous she started eating the meat like a starving dog, barely chewing one gulp before taking in the next.

Lexa found it to be grotesquely fascinating. Her manners were atrocious, but she couldn't look away. She eats like it's the best thing she has ever eaten, and is afraid that something is going to take it from her. Or take her from it. She remembered the conversation they had shared earlier about her home. And the food. Perhaps this truly is the best she has eaten. And given her life here thus far, it is not surprising that she expects not to have time to finish a meal. The knowledge humbled her.

Clarke finished her two pieces and Lexa offered her one more, which was gratefully accepted. Lexa ate the last piece slowly, contemplating Clarke. She had been worried when the blonde had started pulling away from her, fearing that she would lose the girl. That fear had made her acknowledge feelings that should not be felt. Not for an enemy. Not this soon. But there was something about her... Something that Lexa couldn't quite place, but it was there, drawing her to the blonde all the same.

Grandmother would have called it the red string of fate. She mused, remembering the woman. She had scoffed at the story of the matchmaking god back then, believing Yue Lao to be no more than a myth. He is a myth. She told herself. But she knew that had her grandmother lived to see her now, the woman would cackle, clap her hands, and do a silly little dance while gleefully saying that you never know. She smiled fondly, missing the old woman.

She looked back to Clarke, who had finished her meal and was now busy licking her fingers, and smiled for a different reason. She had been worried when Clarke had withdrawn, but she had had to fight not to show her joy when she had learned why. She had doubted me and my intentions for her. But she had also withdrawn from me, not wanting to be mine for only a night. This is what made Lexa want to smile now. She could have allowed herself to be used and discarded, no strings attached, but she doesn't want that and neither do I. She deserves better. And she knows it. The simple fact that Clarke felt she was worthy of more, even if she didn't know that was what it was, made her heart sing.

Blue eyes made contact with hers, searching. A sheepish grin spread across pink lips, an embarrassed blush tinting her fair cheeks as she realized how she must have looked. She rubbed her shoulder awkwardly. "Um... Thank you. For the fish I mean. It was good."

Lexa grinned. "When I taught you the manners of a horse, I did not expect you to start eating like one." She teased.

The blush spread further even as Clarke laughed at the joke. "Heh... Yeah. Sorry about that."

"It is ok. I am glad you enjoyed it." Lexa said sincerly.

Clarke smiled at her. She leaned back on her hands, looking at the sky. "It will be midnight soon." She mused. "Do we need to go back?"

"Soon." Lexa sighed, rising to her feet. She pulled Clarke to hers, allowing her time to settle her weight with an injured foot. "But not yet. There is one more place I want to show you. Do you think you're up for it?"

Clarke grinned. "I was hoping you would say that." She bent over and picked up the bucket of water, dousing the remains of their fire, steam filling the air as the fire hissed its death. She put the bucket back in its place and wrapped her arms around Lexa, kissing her softly. "So where to?"

My bed if you keep that up. She smiled, adjusting their pose so Clarke could lean on her as they walked instead. She hadn't said anything, but Lexa knew she must be hurting by now, and wanted to make it easier for her. "You'll see."