Little, green-blossumed floweres pop up in the grass in front of you. Each is in the shape of a different letter. They spell out the words;
NOT MINE!
The sound of a bulldozer in the distance startles you enough to make you jump out of the way. The bulldozer runs slowly over the flowers, crushing them under its weight. On the side facing you are the words;
NO MONEY SHALT BE MADE OFF OF THIS PROJECT!
The bulldozer passes, leaving the descimated flowers and you behind. You shrug and start to read the story that seems to have magically appeared in front of you.
However, before you have the chance to begin a crazy clown snatches it out of your hands and cackles in a creepy way. "SPOILER ALERT!" He says gape at him and shake your head. You grab the masterpiece back and continue to read.
Scrub held back Sarah's hair with one hand and her nose with the other. Sarah had been retching for the past few minutes, practically since they'd gotten off the Bandersnatch. Sarah gasped and gulped in air, her face still an uncomely shade of green. "Never, EVER, let me be talked into something like that again!" She said miserably. Scrub sympathetically helped her back up and brushed off her knees for her. Sarah was shakey and a bit disoriented and her head hurt.
They returned from the bushes and back to the pristinely white stone entrance to Mirwana's castle where Jareth and his sister were waiting patiently. Jareth looked concerned and Mirwana was holding out a teacup. "Tea helps to soothe the stomach." She said, patting Sarah kindly on her shoulder.
"Just as it does with most ailments, be they of mind or of body." The voice seemed to come from nowhere, but then a shadow peeled itself from the darkness. A tall man stepped into the midst of their group. He whipped the tophat from his head and bowed deeply. "Your majesties." He straightened and a wide grin was on his face, his deep red lips parting to reveal a gap-toothed smile.
Mirwana smiled warmly. "Hello, Tarrant." He bowed again.
The man's grin widened as he took in the sight of the guests. "And who might these two be?" He lisped. Sarah thought him a curious man, but Scrub was entranced.
"This is Scrub..." She gestured at Sarah. "And this young lady is our Champion." The grin faded a bit and the man nodded nearly imperceptably. Mirwana glanced from him to Scrub and a glint appeared in her eyes. "Speaking of which, I'm afraid that I must split the two of them up. My brother and I must talk with the Champion in private." She urged Scrub forward towards him. "I hope you won't mind entertaining her while we are busy."
"Ahh.." He hesitated, that is, until he looked down at Scrub just in time to see her puppy dog eyes. Sighing, he nodded. "Of, course, m'lady." Mirwana was about to burst out into a giggling fit at this, having experienced the power of that look very recently. However, it might give away her plan, so she simply thanked him and led Sarah away by the hand.
Scrub grinned at the Hatter, her smile almost as wide as his own, but without the space between her teeth. "I adore your outfit!" She said reverantly. "I've always been told I was crazy for liking guys who wear awesome hats, but I don't really care!"
Hatter smiled a genuine smile. "You truly think my hat is that wonderful?" She nodded her head. He took her hand and delicately kissed it. "Thank you so much. And if I am any authority, you have a lovely taste in hats yourself."
She looked down at his hand and gasped. His hand was stained and bandaged, she snuck a peek at the other and it was in similar shape, only he wore a thimble on his middle finger. "What happened? Does it hurt?" She asked worriedly.
He sighed and let go. "It is part of my trade. You see, I am the Royal Hatter. Tarrant Hightopp."
Her jaw dropped. "No fludging way! That is so COOL!" Tarrant's orange hair flipped forward as he once again graced her with a bow. She returned it with a fluttering on of her own. She had found a kindred spirit! "I do something similar. Most of my clothes are things that I make myself. Though I don't do it as a profession, just a bit of dabbling to give me my own unique look."
He took a step back and regarded her for a moment, then told her to spin around. He looked closely at her dress and stockings, and especially the hat. "You do have a very unique look. Your work is very good, I'm you consider watching me do what I do best?" He paused for a second. "Oh my, have I made a rhyme?"
"Yes, my friend, you most certainly did."
He grinned and started walking from the entrance to the castle. After a bit of normal walking, he began to walk backwards so that he could talk to her, somehow managing to avoid objects without seeing them "To get where you need to go here, it is always a good idea to walk backwards when going back the way you came." He remarked airily.
"That makes perfect sense." Scrub reasoned.
"Of course it does. Who would say it doesn't?" He asked, giggling a bit.
"More than half of the population of the Aboveground." She said sadly. Then she perked up. "Where are we going anyway?"
"Oh, well, first we're going to have tea with Thackory and Mally, then we'll come back here and you can witness firsthand how I ply my trade." Her eyes lit up and Hatter noticed this. He remembered how she had looked at him, her eyes going all wide and innocent...childlike, but somehow not. She never stopped taking in the sights around her, he watched her with interest as she took in this new world. He gulped, a knot forming in his gut. She reminded him of someone. Someone who'd left long ago, promising to return, and yet never doing so. If Scrub hadn't been so preoccupied with the scenery, she might have noticed how his green eyes changed to a cloudy blue and how the color of his impossibly bright hair became slightly less bold, how his feet dragged just a bit. He sighed heavily and forced the memory away. That was something good about being mad, he could think random things at moments like this to cheer and distract himself. To this effect, he started to consider things that began with the letter 'S'...Scrub..sunny..sanctuary..satisfied...