It was the best the best of times and it was the worst of times. Actually, that only applied to certain people depending on who they were and what they were currently doing. If that person happened to be Scrub, who was still...ah...enjoying..her time with Tarrant, then it was most certainly the best of times. However, if the person happened to be Willy Wonka, Jareth, or Sarah, then they would all tell me to shove my narrative where the sun don't shine.

Sarah threw up her arms in disgust. "Tell me why we have to sit here and wait for night to come again?"

Willy very calmly explained for the umpteenth time that evening. "Because, Starshine, Knids only have one eye and they can't see all that well in the dark. They wouldn't be able to tell that other people were around besides those who volunteered to be bait."

Jareth sighed and rolled his eyes. "How much longer do we have until darkness falls, Mirwana?" Mirwana glanced at a silver-gilded clock on the wall. Like all other clocks in the Underground and in Underland, it had thirteen hours.

It's hand was now on the six. "Only an hour and a half." She replied with a weary groan.

"Only, indeed." Grumbled a disgruntled Sarah. "I can understand only five minutes, I can understand only fifteen minutes..hell, I could understand only a half hour!" She slammed her fist against the table. "But only an hour and a half? What the hell? I feel as if I'll go mad as Tarrant if this keeps up!"

"We could always play a game to pass the time." Suggested Willy, withdrawing a deck of cards from his jacket. "Do any of you know how to play Bullshit?"

{~Thirty minutes Later~}

Willy grinned. "What's my total winnings this time, Jareth?" He purred. The Goblin King ground his teeth and forced himself not to throttle the other man.

"Three wishes, all-access pass between the worlds, and.." He looked down in shame. "My boots."

Willy giggled into his gloved hand. Beating the amatuers had been easy, even if Jareth had tried to cheat by turning some of the chocolatier's cards into glitter. "Hand them over." He said, striking a serious face.

Jareth made a growling noise, but slipped the leather shoes off his feet. "I thought you were supposed to be a germaphobe." He said, disgruntled. "Can't get much germier than your feet..besides your mouth anyways."

Willy grinned even wider. "Oh, I'm not planning on wearing them. I'm going to have them bronzed."

Jareth stared at Willy. "What the hell are you going to do with a pair of bronzed boots?" He asked, amazed.

Willy leaned in really close. "Do you really want to know?" He said in a whisper. Jareth nodded and Willy giggled evilly. "It's a fetish." He whispered so that only the Goblin King could hear.

Jareth froze, while Willy doubled over laughing. Jareth watched him with a glassy-eyed expression. "How would that even work?" He shook his head, his wild locks going everywhere. "Ignore that question, I never want to know the answer."

Sarah and Mirwana watched this exchange with raised eyebrows. They looked at each other, then back at the two men, then back to each other, shrugged and smiled.

Mild hilarity continued on until it was only fifteen minutes from the time that their plan would be put into action. Mirwana was gone, she was rounding up the last few volunteers and preparing them for what was to come. Scrub and Tarrent were spending these last few moments together..entertaining each other..for the third time that night.

So, now, it was just Sarah and Jareth. Alone. Together. In a small room. Sarah plucked at a stray thread on her blouse, while Jareth eyed her with a haughty, predatorial gaze. "Soooo.." She began uncertainly, she never was one for small talk.

Jareth smirked. "Wanna make out?" He asked in an excellent rendition of a human boy.

Sarah frowned, then shrugged. "Meh, what's the harm? I'm going to be swallowed live within the hour, so might as well get something enjoyable out of the deal."

"What you said." He agreed before capturing her in a tight embrace and dipping her down for a kiss.

{~Meanwhile~}

"But what if something happens and you end up like the Knids?All subtracted and divided and such?" Tarrent asked, his heart breaking. "It would kill me!"

"Machree, we'll just have to accept that risk." Scrub cradled her love's face in her hands, petting his cheek with her thumb. "Come what may.." She leaned down and kissed on his forehead. "Know that I love you."

"Aye. As Ah luv you." He said roughly. Getting up, he smiled sadly. "You reahly trus' Wonka, don' ye?"

"I do. He's one of the few people in the Aboveground that's similar to me. He knows what 'normal' peoplz think of those of us who are different." She said forlornly, thinking back on the years of torment she had endured from the people around her because she wasn't 'like other people'.

"Tis a sad truth, meh luv. The worlt dost see wha' i' wishes, Ah think th' sayin' goes. I' sees somethin' ou' o' th' ordinary an' i' sees a monster or a freak."

"True dat." Scrub returned with a grin. "Now...what was it that Sarah said to Willy before?" Her eyes lit up. "Oh, yes. Let's go kick some Vermicious ass!"

{~Afterward~}

The Knids were still bashing at the stone walls that protected the castle. They'd broken through most of the front of the first half, but still had about three feet of solid rock to crash through. That was when Magnus Rex set his sight on the darting figures emerging from the gates. It surged upon the vulnerable prey like a tidal wave.

Butlers and brave servant girls were swooped up and gobbled willy-nilly and loyal animals practically shoved themselves down the Knids' throats. Sarah and Scrub were among the last of those to leave and therefore over half the knids had started to realize the consequences of their appetite.

Poof! went the first Knid. Plop! went a rabbit butler onto the ground. He looked around him, dazed, but otherwise fine, then hopped back to the rubble of the gates. Soon, the air was filled with such poofs and plops.

However, there was still the matter of Magnus Rex. He had devoured more than his fair share and was still going strong. Scrub and Sarah watched with wide eyes. "There's got to be something like thirty pills that each of those people are holding!" Squeaked Scrub. "For Shiz!"

"I know, he needs a bigger dose!" Sarah thought quick and grabbed the remaining Wonka-Vites from Willy and ran towards the gigantic Knid as fast as she could. Waving her arms, she screamed at him. "Hey, fart-face! Eat me!" And he did, but was messy about it.

Jareth, Scrub, Willy, Mirwana, and Hatter watched in horror as some of the pills went flying. "Hopefully, he ate enough that ti-gha!" Scrub clutched her throat, and started gesturing wildly.

Jareth guessed was happening and tried to help her. But instead of spitting up the three Wonka-Vites that had shot down her throat, she accidently swallowed them. "Cow excrement." Was all she had time to say before she was gone with the same poof that the Knids had disappeared with.

A loud, seemingly sonic boom, shook the air around the horrified group of people. Hatter was staring in shock at where the love his life had once stood, his eyes going from a lovely light green to a depressing, dark, blue. He fell to his knees and covered his face with his hands.

"What happened?" Sarah had appeared in much the way the others had before, only she'd had a harder landing because she'd fallen farther. "Why is Hatter..." She looked around. "Where is Scrub?" She asked.

Hatter moaned from where he kneeled. "Gone. She's-"

"A Minus." Finished Willy in a horrified voice.