I wake up sweating.
'Tobias' I gasp. I hear no reply. I start to panic. I call him again, this time he responds, 'Tris, I'm here, what's wrong?' He runs towards me.
He's safe. He cradles me, arms wrapped around me, holding me tight, swaying me slightly. I start to explain the nightmare.
'I had to shoot you!' I blurt out between sobs. 'Im sorry' I say, even though it was just a dream, I feel sick with guilt. 'But it was so real, I thought you were dead!' I say. 'Tris, im fine, I am not dead, you didn't shoot me, it was just a dream, okay?' he says soothingly. I nod. His grip on me relaxes. I listen to his heartbeat and match it to mine and I feel safe.
With reassurance from Tobias that it will never happen, I will never have to shoot him, I quickly go back to normal. I get changed into back trousers-which are slightly too big, because they don't do any smaller sizes in Dauntless-and a loose fitted v neck. I decide to wear my black high heels, (which are from Christina, which I reluctantly accepted. I join Tobias in the hallway- he looks so handsome, since we got back he has let his hair grow, worked out more and is generally happy, well as happy as he can be, this is where he belong, where we both belong.
'Are you exited for today?' He questions. 'Of course, scaring the initiates, what's not to love?' I say, smiling for the first time today.
I check my watch, 20 minutes before they arrive, we decided to meet Christina there, said she was capable of making her own her way. Tobias and I are on our way to the roof, the opposite side of Dauntless, unfortunately, where we will meet them, right after they jump off the train. Footsteps grow louder behind us, it sounds like high heels. I turn round, it's Christina without make up or her hair styled. 'Thought you were capable of getting yourself ready?' I mock.
'Come on, we can't be late!' Tobias says seriously. Christina is still panting as we walk up the stairs, her face still red- she must have ran all the way from her apartment.
Two minutes to go, we made it to the roof just before they did. 'Nice shoes, Tris' she points out, glad to see that I have actually wore them for a change.
'Thanks, nice hair' I reply. She turns round, so I can't see her face, she must have forgot about it. She starts brushing it with her fingers. ' Four, don't be too harsh, it's their first day, I say. 'Was I harsh last time, when I taught you?' he replies, grinning. I smile back and move closer to him. I kiss him and he kisses back.
'Good luck.' He whispers. 'I love you' I say. 'I love you too,' he whispers. 'Don't want to ruin the moment,' Christina shouts awkwardly, 'but the trains here.' When I squint I can see the faint out line of people stood next to the door, probably nervously shaking with anticipation. Within seconds, the first people jump out, meters before us.
When all the carriages are empty, the crowd gathers, some nurturing their wounds, as Four begins to speak.
'You have now completed your first task as true Dauntless. This is not-' He stops talking. I hear screams, somebody crying out for help. Tobias and I, and a few others- who have truly mastered the art of selflessness, run towards the edge of the roof.
Dangling from on hand, is a short girl with blonde hair knotted across her face. We all grab her arms and pull her up. She must have being holding on for about 60 seconds, before she started screaming, which is strange, maybe she just wanted to try to get up herself. To try and be brave, but that's just idiotic, she could've died.
'Thank you,' she mumbled, her voice still hoarse from the screaming. One of her friends comfort her, as she shakes from shock.
Four starts speaking again, 'As I was saying, you have now completed your first task, this is nothing compared to the rest of the training.' The initiates look annoyed, they though that what they have just done was really brave, but it isn't something to be proud of.
'Everybody, split up,' Christina shouts, 'boys with Four, girls with me and six.' No one moves. 'Now!' They now move quickly into the lines, except for two, the girl that dangled from the roof, and what I thought was her friends are kissing, right in the middle of the two aisles. To most people they would find it cute and wait for them to finish, but we are not romantics.
'Excuse me?' Christina bellows, 'did you not hear me? Get into line!' they do as commanded, both of the avoiding each other's eye because they are too embarrassed- it was their first kiss after all.
Instead of learning to fight, this year we decided to do something different, something better.