At the Beginning With You

Chapter Thirteen

While leaving everyone else within the rescue party behind to set up their camp for the night, Archie walked cautiously in the direction he had seen the daughter of Snow White and Prince Charming disappear in. He found her ten minutes later, using a sword to hack angrily at the overgrown shrubs and weeds hanging down along the path their expedition would be traveling come morning. It wasn't the first time the doctor had seen this kind of anger in someone, but this frightened him just the same.

"If you've come to talk to me at my parents' request, you can turn around and head right back to the camp," she suddenly said coldly without bothering to quit her task at hand. "I told them, I'm not in the mood to talk, not even to you."

"I didn't actually come here by their request," he answered calmly, taking no offense to the harshness in her words. "I came here, because I see someone in a lot of pain, a very good friend."

Still refusing to look back, Emma responded, continuing to cut through the undergrowth before her, "I'm not the one who's in pain. Killian is, and I'm not doing a damn thing to help him."

Archie stayed back, mostly out of fear of getting hit by the blade, as he replied compassionately, "You're wrong, Emma. You're here in Arendelle and you've managed to gather together a small army, as well as two groups of royals to save Hook. Just because we can't continue on tonight…"

"It isn't just that!" she interrupted out of anger, geared more to herself than to him, when she finally stopped swinging her blade and began to pace back and forth before the psychiatrist after he took a seat on a fallen log nearby, as she began to rant. "It's all of it. This, and everything else he's been through ever since I made the choice to save Regina and became the Dark One. I know I made the right decision to save her, so that she wouldn't become the woman she fought so hard to destroy again, but it's also because of that decision that Hook has suffered and was forced down to the Underworld. When he and the others followed me to Camelot, Killian fought constantly to keep me from going dark, and again once we returned to Storybrooke. He risked his life to save my family and because he was struck by Excalibur in doing so, he died. But I couldn't live with that, so of course I turned him into a Dark One in order to save him. He begged me not to, told me he was afraid he wouldn't be strong enough to fight against the darkness because he was weak, but I didn't listen. I couldn't. I could only think about my own pain, the pain of losing him. I knew it was wrong, but I still did it anyway. And it saved him… then, but that choice only led to his death anyway and it was far worse, for him and for me. I had to stand by and watch as he absorbed all of the darkness within the sword while he strained heavily against its power. I had to drive that damn sword, straight through his chest as he gasped in agony because he begged me to save myself and my family, knowing damn well he was going to end up in the Underworld. His last thought was to protect me, even after all I did to hurt him. He suffered, far more than I know he's telling me. And now… now, after we got him back and brought him home… Archie, he was finally beginning to get better and this had to happen! All of this, is my fault!"

"You may think so, but it sounds to me that every decision that you made since taking the darkness into yourself for Regina, was made out of love," the doctor answered sadly. "I can't really talk much about the things Hook… Killian and I have discussed in our appointments, but I can tell you that he forgave you for forcing the darkness into him. He knew it was because you loved him so much. Truthfully, I think that a small a part of him is even flattered. There were times when he used to be unsure whether or not you really did love him."

Emma finally sat down on the log beside the man of conscience and then responded quietly, "I do, so much more than I have ever loved anyone; Neal, Graham, and Walsh, even if he did turn out to be a flying monkey who tried to kill me. I never thought it was possible. I don't know how he got me to let him in, but somehow… he always knew that I would one day. He told me so when we were in Neverland. I had put up wall after wall from having my heart broken so many times and he was able to break through every single one of them. I found true love and we were married. Marriage was never something I thought I would have, but we did, because of Killian. And now, now I'm at risk of losing him again. He won't survive having to go into the Underworld a second time. He barely survived the first time and he's still hardly recovered, nearly eight months later."

Archie reached out and gently placed a hand over her knee as he looked into her eyes while he replied, "That won't happen. Do you want to know why I know that?"

"Why?" she asked eagerly.

"Because, you're the Savior," he answered simply. "And you are Emma Swan, who is brilliant at getting everyone their happy endings. Yours and Killian's might be taking far longer for it to come, but neither one of you will quit. I've seen it, and so haven't everyone else living in Storybrooke. Besides, not only do you have each other to help you through this painful stage in your life, but you also have a family and friends who love you both, including me."

Emma looked at the doctor as he stood up and began to walk away, then she swiftly called out, "Thank you, Archie."

He smiled and stated, "You're welcome, Miss. Swan."

After the doctor, who was also a cricket, walked out of sight, Emma looked down at her hands between his ring on her finger and the sword that once belonged to Neal, which Killian had given to her out of kindness and respect. Then, she thought back to the words he had said to her that made her realize Captain Hook was far more than what she initially believed him to be, a man she could see herself wanting to help become the real man buried deep down inside of him, a man with whom she could see a glimpse of the possibility of a future together.

"I assumed he'd heard my secret," he spoke almost regretfully after Neal walked away from them in the forest of Neverland. "And I also assumed that you'd told him of our shared moment."

"Why would you assume that?" Emma asked in confusion as she looked at the pirate in frustration.

Hook looked at her with a yearning in his eyes as he responded, "Because I was hoping it meant something."

She quickly replied sincerely, "What meant something was that you told us Neal was still alive. Thank you. I realized you could've kept Pan's information to yourself."

"Why would I have done that?" he asked curtly.

"I don't know," the blonde answered hesitantly. "Maybe Pan offered you a deal? Why else would he tell you?"

Disdainfully, though the disdain was geared toward himself, not at the woman standing in front of him, Hook responded, "It was a test. He wanted to see if I'd leave an old friend to die... even if the old friend happens to be vying for the same woman that I am."

Emma looked at him with surprise as she said, "And you chose your friend."

"Does that surprise you?" he asked.

"You are a pirate." Emma replied in a sardonic tone.

Killian felt the shame once again while he looked down for a moment until he raised his head and moved closer to her with a strong confidence as he answered, "Yeah, that I am. But I also believe in good form. So when I win your heart, Emma... and I will win it... it will not be because of any trickery. It will be because you want me."

She looked at like he was joking as she stated, "This is not a contest, Hook."

"Isn't it?" he quickly retorted. "You're gonna have to choose, Emma. You realize that, don't you? Because neither one of us is gonna give up."

"The only thing I have to choose is the best way to get my son back." Emma responded in frustration as she glared at him.

Hook looked deeper into her eyes as he replied assuredly, "And you will."

She quickly asked, "You think so?"

"I have yet to see you fail," Killian finally said and then smiled smugly. "And when you do succeed... well, that's when the fun begins."

"Archie's right," Emma softly muttered to herself out loud as she stood up again and then started walking back to where her family and friends were waiting for her to return. "I know that you won't give up me, and I sure as hell won't give up on you. We will survive this too, just as we have always done."