Eternal Go

Summary: After Hokuto Cup tournament, Akira finally get to know about Sai and more.

Disclaimer: I do not own Hikaru no Go. Hikaru no Go belongs to the author, Yumi Hotta and Takeshi Obata. I merely use their characters and the story.

Author's Note: 1) This is NOT shounen-ai or yaoi. 2) Sentence which are in italic and within quotation mark "bla bla bla" means it's what the character thinks in his mind. Sentence which are in italic only (without quotation mark) represents the sentence in flashback. 3) I use "Akira" to refers "Touya Akira" and "Hikaru" to refers "Shindou Hikaru". All the other characters' name except that use only the surename. 4) English is not my native, and I live at a country that doesn't use English, so please forgive me for the mistakes and please bear with it. QAQ

Hope you like it!

Chapter 3

Hikaru and Akira were standing in front of Touya's house. The two had just finished playing at the usual Go salon. It was the second time Hikaru came to that place. The first one was to practice together with Yashiro and Kurata for the Hokuto Cup tournament.

"I'm home... Come on in, Shindou,"

"Sorry for the intrusion," Hikaru followed Akira and soon met Touya Akiko in the hallway.

"I'm home, mother,"

"Welcome home, Akira-san," Akira's mother smiled at her son then turned to Hikaru, "Shindou-kun, right? Welcome."

"Mother, where's father?"

"Ah, he's in his room," said Akira's mother as she went inside.

Akira led Hikaru to a room. It was the room which was used for meeting with a guest.

"Wait here, Shindou, I'll tell my father," Akira left the room.

"I wonder why would Touya sensei ask me to come. I hope it's not about Sai. I could manage somehow if it's about the Hokuto Cup tournament. By the way, it's been about a year since the last I talked to him in hospital, huh? Now if I recall, this is also the first time I meet sensei without Sai. No..., from now on, it will be like this,"

"Shindou-kun?" A man's voice brought him back to the world.

"Ah, Yes."

"Sorry for making you to come," Touya Kouyou walked in followed by Akira.

"No, not at all,"

"Now after you came what about we have a game? But, please don't handicapped yourself like the last time," Touya Kouyo sat before the goban.

Hikaru followed him and smiled at those words, "No, it would be impossible for me to do that now,"

"Please," Hikaru and Touya Kouyo bowed to each other.

The game was started. None of them tried to speak. Hikaru knew that he was no match against the ex-Meijin, but he had to play it at best as he could since it was a rare chance for him to play against a high dan, even though Touya Kouyou had retired since last year. Of course, in the end, he was the one to resign, but playing an even game with him made Hikaru satisfied enough by the experience he got.

"Akira, can you leave us?"

Just like Hikaru, Akira was a bit surprised by this order, but he knew he couldn't disobey it. "Yes, father," and he went out before glancing at Hikaru for a second.

"I saw your game at Hokuto Cup tournament and realized you have grown stronger."

Hikaru lowered his head, "No, I am still far from it,"

"Don't say that. You made a close game against that Yong-Ha," Touya Kouyo paused for seconds, "Actually, when I was in discussion room, I was told by Kurata-san the reason the players were switched back then. It was Honinbo Shusaku."

"Yes," Hikaru felt like he started understand the point of this conversation.

"Thinking about Shusaku reminded me of Sai who won a play against me last year. Maybe that's because I've never met someone that stronger," he focused his eyes to Hikaru, "Shindou-kun, I believe I had asked you this, but could I play with Sai again? It would be fine to play in the net."

Hikaru silenced for moments then shook his head, "I'm sorry, but you can't. No, we, all of us, won't be able to play against him anymore."

Touya Kouyo actually want to ask the reason, but seeing Hikaru's expression, he made himself a conclusion and couldn't be able to bring it out."I see..."

Seeing Touya Kouyo's expression made Hikaru clenched his hands tightly. He could feel it, the ex-Meijin's sorrow and frustration which were shown by his eyes. After all, if it was not because of him, Sai and Touya Kouyou would have much more chances to play together. "Sensei," Hikaru raised his head,"Do you still want to know about Sai's identity?" He faced him with firmly eyes even though it felt unbearable.

Touya Kouyou looked at Hikaru, "Why?"

"Because... Beside Touya, I believe you're another person who have the right to know," "So that you wouldn't regret your match, and so that you could regain yourself by knowing that Sai thought you as his rival. But... Above all, it's because I have a feeling that you felt a great loss as I did."

"I have the right to know, huh?" Touya Kouyou closed his eyes for few seconds. "If you really don't mind, then please tell me," Even though it might be meaningless since he couldn't play Sai anymore, at least, he wanted to know who Sai was. In addition, it was Hikaru's determined eyes which brought that decision to listen to him.

Hikaru nodded, "I don't know whether you will believe me or not, but I'll tell you," and he started telling him about his meeting with a ghost from Heian era who possessed his consciousness, the match with Akira, the meetings with Touya Kouyou until the parting few days after having a game with Touya Kouyo.

As expected, Touya Kouyou looked astounded after listening to all that. He, indeed, sometimes had thought that Sai might be a reincarnation of Shusaku, or even a reincarnation of the god of Go since his ability was far beyond human, but to listen to Hikaru's confession by himself was more shocking. However, he knew it might be the truth. Hikaru wouldn't have any reason to make that kind of lie and Sai's strength proved it.

"I see... So, that's true... No wonder I lost," said Touya Kouyou after several minutes in silence.

"But, Sensei, it's true that time you lost, but it's true that Sai did think of you as his rival and I'm sure that won't change. The first time he saw you at television, he said that it was really rare to meet people like you and even in past, there was no person like you. He really thought you as a rival and even worried when you were hospitalized. He was really happy to be able to have a match against you and he said 'Thank You'." Hikaru was speaking while looking at the tatami below so that Touya Kouyou couldn't see his face.

"Therefore, now, I want to apologize. I'm really sorry," Hikaru continued as bowed his head.

"Why do you apologize?"

"If it's not because of my selfishness, he... Sai would be able to play with Sensei more. No, he would be able to play more with Touya, you, and many people."

Touya Kouyo fell silent for a moment, "Stop talking such nonsense. How could you call that selfishness?"

"But it is." Hikaru clenched his hands as tight as he could. "After he disappeared, I took a look at Shusaku's kifus. All was played by Sai, he's really genius. Shusaku who he possessed had interest in go, so he understood that. I should do the same as Shusaku did, letting him play all the time with everyone, but I–! Because of my selfishness... If I knew he's that genius, I would have let him play forever! Rather than me, it would be better if it was him!" Tears run down on his cheek, "For him to disappear like that... I don't even know his face when he disappeared nor if he regretted being with me,"

Touya Kouyo looked at Hikaru who was now crying while clenching his hands. Saying he didn't feel any loss would be a big lie. Of course he regretted for not being able to play with Sai anymore. However, blaming a 15 years old kid was the worst thing and he knew well that the loss of his rival was something inevitable.

"Shindou-kun, I used to play and teach Akira go since he was a kid, and to me, seeing Akira's progress is such a bliss. For Sai to teach you, did he show any regret during your days? Did he ever ask you to be his puppet?"

Hikaru gasped at Touya Kouyo's words. At sudden, he remembered everything clearly.

Hikaru, don't just place each stone like a doll. Try to feel the flow on my moves. From now on I will be playing this game to teach you.

It's not impossible,

Overcome it and step to the edge.

Thank you, Hikaru,

"And to ask you to play with him even though he had no more time, didn't it mean he want to spend his last time by playing you?"

Hikaru gritted his teeth.

"Now, please excuse me," Touya Kouyo rose from his seat, walked away and closed the door.

"Sai..." Hikaru's tears were overflowing.

.

.

Akira stood still as his hands were clenched. Scenes of pasts were flowing into his minds like an old movie.

"..kira..."

I'm just not good enough. It's doesn't matter whether I play or not.

I'm not going to play anymore. Sorry.

For him to disappear like that... I don't even know his face when he disappeared nor if he regretted being with me,

"Akira, didn't I ask you to leave?" Touya Kouyo was standing in front of him.

"..Father... I'm really sorry.."

Looking at his only child, the ex-Meijin let out a sigh. "..Come with me," He said that in low voice so that the one crying in the room couldn't hear him. Akira followed him while his minds was not.

If I knew he's that genius, I would have let him play forever! Rather than me, it would be better if it was him!

Because of my selfishness...

The two were in Touya Kouyou's room now. Touya Kouyou was sitting before Akira who could only lower his face.

"Did you hear?"

Akira nodded, "Half of it. I'm sorry, I was told about it two days ago. But, when I accidentally heard he shouted, I just couldn't..."

Touya Kouyou looked at his son. He could understand that, and he realized that the face made by his son since he saw him in front of the room until now was because of what he had heard right after running to that room.

"Father... Shindou, he..."

The reason I play go... is to link the far past with the far future. That's why I'm here.

Akira clenched his hands once again. "He was always burdened with such thing."

If you keep chasing my ghost, the real me is going to catch up with you someday.

The one you're chasing all the time, who you're looking at, your rival, all of them is none but Sai,

Unfortunately, I'm not Sai.

Akira gritted his teeth.

A/N

Well, that is the last chapter of this story. Maybe it's too short, but... well, I think this is it for now. There will be a sequel of this story. I'll write it when I have time.

Anyway, Thank you for reading it and hope you like it. Read and Review please... See ya ^^