A/N Thank you to everyone who reviewed and is following this story, you inspire me to keep writing.

A note about male rape: Sexual assault can happen to anyone, no matter your age, your sexual orientation, or your gender identity. Men and boys who have been sexually assaulted or abused may have many of the same feelings and reactions as other survivors of sexual assault, but they may also face some additional challenges because of social attitudes and stereotypes about men and masculinity. If this has happened to you get help by calling the National Sexual Assault Hotline 800-656-HOPE(4673) or get more information at rainn get-information

By the time Ezra left IA he was shaking with contained emotion. He felt as though he had been raped all over again. Truly it felt almost worse than the original assault because these people were supposed to be on his side. Instead they accused him of lying, and insinuated that he and Danielson had a previous undisclosed relationship. They acted as though he had wanted it, as part of some kinky fantasy. They accused him of being a dirty agent, and it felt like Atlanta all over again.

Ezra felt emotionally and physically drained as he headed toward Chris' office. Poker face firmly in place, he knocked on Chris' door. Chris looked up from his computer with a concerned expression, and motioned for Ezra to come in and close the door.

"How did things go with IA?"

"As expected. I stopped by to let you know that I am suspended during their investigation. They need to talk to team six, and probably you as well."

"Ez, you know it's not yer fault right?"

"Mr. Larabee, you may not have meant it when you said that got what I deserved, but others do mean it. They truly believe that I deserved everything that happened to me, and maybe I did. After all, I was foolish enough to follow a suspect into an unsecured building, and I was obviously not aware enough of my surroundings when doing so, since he was able to easily overpower me. So perhaps I truly did get what I deserved." Talking over Chris' protests he continued. "It is not important, I will take my leave now. You may call me at home if you have any more questions about the case." Chris watched Ezra go with a feeling of hopelessness. Inwardly he cursed Danielson for what he had done to Ezra, but he also cursed the system for making Ezra feel worse, and Maude for causing these feeling of insecurity in the first place which were then preyed upon by Danielson and the system. Sighing heavily Chris wondered if the shattered pieces of Ezra's fragile soul would be able to be put back together, or if this time it was finally too much.

Over the next few weeks Ezra became even more withdrawn from the team. Due to his suspension and injuries he spent most of the time at home unless he was at the hospital for physical therapy. The other six dropped by to check on him often, bringing him updates on their cases. About two weeks into his suspension Ezra had developed a fever, and flu like symptoms, but they passed, and he had chalked it up to the stress of everything going on. The day before the four week anniversary of the attack, Internal Affairs officially closed their investigation into Ezra due to the lack of evidence for any of their theories. The next day Ezra went back to work.

Chris was still the only one of the other six who knew the full details of the assault. When Ezra arrived on the twelfth floor the others were waiting to welcome him back to work. Nathan hovered asking if he was still doing the exercises the therapist had recommended for his shoulder, while buck joked that the sling would be a good tool to use to attract women. JD regaled Ezra with his newest pranks, team six seemed to be taking the brunt of those. Josiah inquired about when he wanted to do his mandatory psych evaluation, Ezra told him that they had scheduled it for just before lunch. Vin asked about how soon Ezra would be able to requalify on the shooting range, and Ezra explained to the sharpshooter that it would be another two weeks before the sling even came off.

Chris watched as Ezra hid a flinch whenever someone would touch him. He saw the forced smile that Ezra kept plastered on his face throughout the welcome. Finally he stepped out into the main office.

"Ezra could you come here a minute?" he called breaking up the welcoming party. Ezra shot him a grateful look before heading over.

"How may I help you Mr. Larabee?" he inquired

"Let's step into my office Ez." Once they were both seated at the desk behind a closed door Chris continued. "How are ya really doing Ez?"

Ezra sighed "Honestly I am not at all certain how I am. I am looking forward to working again, it will help me not constantly think about what happened. I thought about it, but I still don't want to tell the others what happened."

"I understand Ez, it's yer decision. I won't tell anyone you don't want me to. Just so you know, Judge Travis does already know because he sees a copy of your reports, and the IA investigation will have made sure that he actually read it. "

"I rather assumed that he had seen it. I know I may not be able to keep this a secret forever, but at least for now, I need to. I cannot deal with the others knowing right now."

Chris agreed to keep the secret, and after going over Ezra's restricted duty he allowed the agent to go back to his desk.

Ezra checked his watch impatiently as he sat in the hospital waiting room. He had taken a long lunch in order to go to the hospital for the follow up tests that they needed to run, and was waiting on the results. Just then the nurse called him back to the private conference room. The doctor was already waiting for him. "Mr. Standish, I'm afraid I have some troubling news. As you are aware, one of our standard protocols for victims of sexual assault is to test for HIV. The results of your blood test today confirm that you are HIV positive."