Author's Note: I hope y'all had a great holiday! I know I haven't uploaded for a while, but I was with my family and I didn't have my laptop! But I'm on break for a while now! So I'm hoping to get a couple chapters up:) Thank's so much to everyone for reading! I LOVE YOU ALL! -Xoxo:)
Naturally, April insisted that you move into the loft. A few months had passed and you were now very close to all three of them, spending almost all of your time in the loft. "Pleeeeasseee Y/N!" April whines, grabbing your wrist and jumping up and down. "You practically live here already! Just bring some stuff down and put it in my room! It'll save us all a lot of money and you're my best friend so imagine how great it would be if we were roommates!" She squeals.
You sigh but smile, realizing that she had a good point. "Okay fine." You tell her. She screams and hugs you tightly. "This is going to be great I promise!" You smile at her. "Yeah!" You tell her that you're going to bring some of your things downstairs and you leave.
You sigh and start up the stairs. You were excited, but moving all of your stuff would be a hassle.
...
After situating your things in April's (and now your) room, you notified the landlord that you had moved out and officially stopped paying the ridiculous rent. Although now you were sharing the rent with three other people.
That night you had pizza to celebrate, although you were all quite tired so you went to bed early. Although April didn't come into your room right away, and after hearing some interesting noises from Roger's room you guessed where she was and what she was doing.
You just sigh and pick up you book. You read for a little although things didn't get much quieter. Eventually you got up to look for Mark. As soon as you walked out of your room, you noticed him sitting at the kitchen counter, drinking coffee and fiddling with his camera.
"I thought you were asleep." You say, sitting down across from him. "I was." He says with a chuckle, eyeing his and Roger's room. You just laugh. "Right." You say.
"Want some coffee?" He asks getting up and going over to the 'stove'. You nod. "Yeah, thanks."
He sets a red cup down in front of you, but continues to play with his camera. "You haven't done much filming lately." You tell him. He shrugs. "The documentary kinda sucks." He says. Aw Mark.
"No it doesn't! You're great, Mark. You just need motivation." You tell him, standing up and going to sit next to him. He puts down the camera and looks at you, his blue eyes reflecting the moonlight. "I've got motivation." He says. Although he didn't seem to believe it much.
He seemed much sadder than usual. "What's wrong?" You ask him. He looks at the floor and shrugs. You grab his hands, and you feel him jump slightly. "Come on, what's wrong?" You ask him again. This time he looks up and stares into your eyes.
"Lots." He tells you. You raise an eyebrow. "Like what?" You push the question further.
"What the hell am I doing here?" He asks you more than himself. What did he mean? "Well, you're here because you want to be here Mark." You tell him sweetly. He shakes his head. "No. I don't want to be here." He says.
Why was he so upset all of a sudden?
"If I knew my life would be like this...If I knew I'd be living in a crappy apartment with no heat and no food and a roommate who spends everyday banging his girlfriend so loudly I can't sleep-I would have gone to college. What the hell was I thinking?! I thought I had this great passion for film but I-I can't even finish this stupid documentary." He finished.
He lets go of your hands and bury's his face in his own. "You're right. I've got no motivation." He says, taking his hands from his face and looking at you. You shake your head. "No Mark. You've got me." You tell him. He just looks at you.
"But you don't love-"
"Don't you dare finish that sentence Cohen. I love you more than anything. I know I'm not the best girlfriend ever...but I love you more than anyone else in the world and nothing is going to change that. I promise it's not. You're here because if you weren't...we wouldn't have met...and I wouldn't be the luckiest girl alive." You say, kissing him passionately. He immediately kisses you back.
"I love you so much." He says and you both smile. You kiss him once more, harder, and eventually you end up in your room...and you can probably guess what happened next.
...
The next day you woke up, not remembering much of the night before and heading into the kitchen to look for food.
Nothing.
Mark and Roger were sitting on the couch, Mark fiddling with his camera as usual, and Roger tuning his guitar. You sit down in a chair. "Morning." You greet them both, but kiss Mark on the cheek.
Both of them mumble some sort of greeting and continue doing whatever they were doing before. "Where's April?" You ask. "Out." Roger tells you. "Out where?" You ask. He shrugs. How did he not know?!
"Oh. Okay." You say, going to your room to retrieve your book, but you are stopped by a knock on the door.
You open it to see your best friend, with red eyes and messy hair. She grabs your arm and pulls you outside. "April?!" You say concerned. "SHH!" She says, pulling you down the stairs and out of the loft. "April what is going on?!" You ask her urgently, shocked by how suddenly her usual bubbly and enthusiastic demeanor had changed.
"I went to the doctor." She says. Oh god. You didn't like the sound of this.
"And you know...you know how I haven't been feeling well the past few weeks?" She asks. You nod. Eyes wide.
"Well I woke up this morning, and I could barely breath...so I told Roger I was going to the store and he didn't question it." She says, tears running down her face. You nod once more, waiting for what she had to tell you.
"I have AIDS." She comes out and says it.
It was like a bullet. Once quick blow.
You feel the world spinning, and for a moment you feel like you might puke...yet the cold morning breeze keeps you from passing out. Your hand moves to your mouth. "Oh my god." Is all you say, before tears threaten to escape your eyes.
"April." You say her name and pull her close, breathing in the lovely scent of the shampoo she had used to wash her hair the night before. She hugs you back, her fingernails digging into your flannel shirt. "April." You say once more, but this time your bawling.
You knew what AIDS was.
And you knew that it was practically a death sentence. But how did April get it? She didn't have sex with anyone who-
Oh.
You think back to a conversation you had had with Mark a few weeks after you met.
"What's taking them so long?" You ask him, waiting for April and Roger to arrive back at the loft. "Well you know..." He says.
You actually don't know.
"I know what?" You ask him. He looks at you.
"Look. I know neither April or Roger have probably told you this...but you should know. They both kind of have a drug problem. If they come home high it's not exactly shocking." He says.
What?! But April seemed so...normal. Why wouldn't she tell you?
"Oh." Is all you say.
And Mark was right, they both came home high, with needles in their hands...although neither had any recollection of it the following morning.
It was the drugs. It was the damn needles. God these drug dealers don't even have clean needles?!
You just hug her tighter and cry into her shoulder.
"It's okay. You'll be fine." You tell her reassuringly, pulling away. Suddenly her face turns even paler than before.
"April?!" You ask her. Putting a hand on her shoulder. "Roger." She says. And suddenly you realize.
She gave it to Roger. She must have. Her eyes then turn panicked and she starts shaking.
"Y/N you can't tell him. He'll kill me please Y/N don't tell him...Don't tell anyone." She says seriously.
Not a good idea. At all.
But you agree anyway. She hugs you quickly and you both compose yourselves, before walking back up to the loft.