Warnings: Angst, violence, language, adventure, lemons, AU, fantasy, angst again.
A/N: Thanks to everyone who is sticking with this! I appreciate your patience with me for not updating this as frequently as some of my other work.
Lost Dreams
Chapter Eleven
Duo had been involved in battles before. He had faced down the Mysian army before, and he had fought shoulder to shoulder with comrades just as committed to destroying the Mysians as he was.
But Duo had never been part of an army before. He had never had orders to follow, had never had anyone look to him for guidance.
Either Solo hadn't thought of that or simply didn't care, because he promptly ordered Duo to the battlements and put him in charge of keeping the western wall clear of Mysian siege engines.
Solo gave Carl the north wall and seemed intent on stalking between the two, cursing the Mysians and shouting encouragement to the Theran soldiers.
Duo hadn't even realized that Trowa and Heero were with him on the battlement until they stepped up to his side.
"Any thoughts?" Trowa asked, and Duo couldn't decide if he was addressing him or Heero.
Stretched out beyond them was the Mysian army, a ghoulish array of shadows illuminated by firelight as they thundered towards the fort walls.
"I count twelve siege towers," Heero mused. "The ground is uphill, so we've got that to our advantage…"
"Pretty rocky too," Trowa muttered.
Duo found himself nodding in agreement.
"Smoother here than the north wall, though," he added.
"How lucky for us," Heero said, and Duo couldn't tell if he was joking or not. He knew that Heero desperately wished that Duo was hiding under a mattress somewhere… but the man was a warrior. There was a spark of excitement in his eyes that Duo knew was mirrored in his own and Trowa's.
"Your archers…" Duo started and then shook his head. "You aren't at war with Mysia. Nevermind."
Trowa sighed.
"We are Thera's ally," he pointed out.
"Sylvia –" Heero started.
"Trusts me," Trowa said. "She sent Ralph and the others to ask for support for our settlements. No, this is sooner than she would like, but we were headed down this path come spring anyway." He sighed and turned around.
"Sentinels to me!" He called loudly and clearly.
A moment later the remaining four Sentinels joined them.
"For now," Duo instructed, "focus your fire on the closest towers, but when they start to get too close, change your targets to the next line and leave the first ones for the soldiers to hack at when they're close enough."
"Weather's perfect. Cold and dry…if we had some fire and some fuel…" Trowa mused.
Duo frowned at him.
"We could dip our arrows – shooting –"
"Do it," Duo said, following the explanation to its logical conclusion. He turned to the nearest soldier. "Run to the kitchen, grab all the lard you can."
He turned back to the Sentinels.
"Spread out on this wall and the North wall – we're the easier target but we need to fend them off from all sides."
The Sentinels looked at him and then Trowa, who gave them a brief nod before they moved to obey.
Trowa turned to Duo with a smirk.
"Those are my men," he said lightly, clearly more amused than irritated.
Duo felt himself flush.
"Sorry. I –"
Trowa waved off the apology.
"Where do you want me?"
Duo scanned the battlements and then looked over the layout of the approaching siege towers.
"Closer to the corner – that's the smoothest and least steep path. They'll push it the hardest."
Trowa nodded and moved off to his post.
Heero sighed and Duo turned to look at him.
"What?"
"There'll be no stopping you now," the guard muttered.
"I don't understand."
"You aren't just some rebel out to ruin the Mysians day anymore – you're a Prince of Thera and you just gave orders to people like you'd been doing it your entire life. And they listened."
"Some of them," Duo corrected, feeling a little silly for trying to give orders to the Sentinels.
Heero smirked, clearly amused by that as well.
A moment later a line of soldiers bearing lard filled bowls walked up. Duo directed them to the Sentinels arrayed along the battlements.
"How many arrows do they have?" Duo asked Heero.
The other man shrugged.
"Thirty to forty each. And these men are all among the best marksmen in Kos. Trowa, in particular. We can count on most of those arrows hitting their targets."
"So upwards of a hundred then… not all at the men, some at the engines… that should still put a dent in their forces," Duo mused.
He watched as Trowa drew back his arm and let loose a single, fiery arrow.
A moment later it landed, several hundred yards in front of the closest siege engine.
"That's their range," Heero explained for Duo. "They'll hold their fire until the towers pass that arrow."
Duo nodded.
"In the meantime?"
"We wait."
Duo drew in a deep breath and forced himself to remain calm. He felt Heero's hand squeeze his shoulder.
"This is your fight, my Prince. You WILL succeed."
Duo allowed the words to fill him with confidence and the sound of Heero's voice calling him 'my Prince' flooded him with heat and the memory of Heero's lips on his.
The actions of Heero and Trowa confused the hell out of Duo. He wanted to think that it was just a game – maybe they were bored and had decided he was an easy target and found toying with him amusing.
But the two men were the most honorable and sincere people he had ever met. They were prone to making scathing, sarcastic remarks but playing some elaborate joke like this – it went against everything they seemed to be.
Which left Duo facing the fact that they did like him. Which scared him far more than the Mysian army marching towards him.
After a few moments of tense silence, the first of the Mysian troops passed Trowa's arrow.
"Fire!" The Sentinel ordered his men, and flaming arrows started to rain down on the advancing soldiers.
Duo watched, impressed and more than a little awed, at the deadly accuracy of the five men.
"You might want to prepare the men," Heero said, loud enough that only Duo could hear him. "The first of those engines will be on us in a few moments. They need to aim for hands and faces – anything exposed, anything vital."
Duo did as Heero suggested, more than a little surprised that the soldiers listened to him. They looked anxious, but his words seemed to instill a sense of determination in them.
"I'm never going to get a decent night's sleep again," Heero muttered, but when Duo turned to look at him he looked far from irritated. If anything, he looked proud. He caught Duo staring at him and smirked. "For a number of reasons," he added, heat in his eyes.
Duo swallowed hard and turned back to the fight, shoving all thoughts of Heero and Trowa's perfect bodies from his mind.
It was four hours later when the Mysian army retreated to their camp in the village.
The Theran soldiers around Duo looked ready to drop dead from exhaustion. He was amazed that they had fought as well and as long as they had.
He was also more than a little sickened and depressed by the number of Therans who had died.
They had lost twenty-eight men, and another fourteen were injured. Despite that, they had managed to significantly damage the Mysian forces.
Between the initial casualties from the Sentinels and then waves of Mysians who had tried to cross over from their towers to the battlements there were nearly ninety dead Mysians on the field.
Which still left the Therans outnumbered two to one.
Solo gathered Carl, Duo, Trowa, Heero, Quatre, Hilde, and Alex in the Captain's quarters to discuss strategy.
The others looked just as exhausted as Duo felt, but they also looked just as committed to finishing this fight.
"Having your Sentinels saved us," Carl said as soon as they more or less collapsed into chairs around the large table in his room. One of the free workers bustled among them, depositing food and tea.
Trowa looked at Duo.
"You can thank your Prince for that strategy," he said mildly, earning a scowl from Carl.
Duo smiled tiredly.
He actually respected the Captain. The events of eight months ago had made it clear that Carl was a man of honor, and the events of last night provided ample evidence of his bravery and dedication.
"It won't work again," Trowa continued. "We used all of our arrows – and unless you Therans have decided to stockpile weapons you don't use –" Carl shook his head in the negative –"then we don't have anything left to shoot."
"Which means we won't last another night – or day," Carl observed and sighed. "We can put up a hell of a fight, but… they'll win. With our losses and without your men to keep them leery, those towers will overwhelm us."
"Then what are we going to do about the free workers?" Duo asked.
Carl frowned, but Solo spoke up before the soldier could.
"Duo, I know that you want to save them, but –"
"But we can!" Duo interrupted, angry that no one seemed to care that innocent people would die. "It's not perfect, and it sure as hell won't be easy, but we've got to try this."
"The water is freezing and the current impossible," Carl growled.
"We can tie a guide line," Heero mused. "From one shore to the other – it will help the crossing. As for the cold… I think the free workers would rather risk it than Mysian mercy."
"What about the bridge?" Hilde asked, referring to the actual crossing over the Hellas river. The bridge was closer to the free worker settlement, nearly half a mile downstream of the fort.
"It's guarded by Mysians," Hilde added when everyone looked at her in confusion. "As soon as they realize you're evacuating people across the river they'll split their army and come after us."
"We could destroy it," Quatre offered.
"How?" Carl growled. "Pray to the Gods?"
"The bridge has stone pylons," Duo pointed out, "but the structure is wooden. We could burn it."
"Still guarded by the Mysians," Carl argued.
"Not many, I'm sure," Quatre added. "Not when they aren't expecting us to be doing anything but trying not to die."
Solo shook his head.
"There's still the matter of getting to it. And how to destroy it."
Duo looked at Carl, trying to gauge his attitude. The Captain seemed to be near the end of his energy and patience, and Duo had no doubt that if given the chance, he would love an excuse to take out his anger on Duo.
He sighed.
"If I recall, Tsubarov had stores of saltpeter around here somewhere…"
Sure enough, Carl's face went white and his eyes narrowed.
"You–"
"I wasn't the bastard running a smuggling operation out of this fort!" Duo jumped in before Carl could get going.
"Yet you were his source of income!"
"Not his primary source! He sold weapons to damn near anyone who had the gold to pay for them!"
"And where did YOU get the gold?" Carl demanded. He slammed his hand on the table. "Don't pretend that you weren't complicit in his activities! If scum like you didn't exist then he –"
"Probably would have started selling things to the damn Mysians! Tsubarov was a smuggler, a tyrant, and a pervert. Or are you going to blame me for his habit of raping –"
"You made sure he paid for it without ever giving those victims the chance to see real justice!"
"Justice? I've seen the way this army works! As soon as the allegations were made you know Tsubarov was packing his damn bags and preparing to request a transfer back to Antioch. You know it!"
They stood glaring at each other, and Duo was surprised by how much energy he had to be angry about this.
"You let that boy die," Duo hissed. "You were the one who followed his orders and threw me in the dungeons instead of letting me do the right thing. You know you were wrong. And I'll go to my grave regretting his death, and I know you will too because you aren't Tsubarov. Neither of us is."
"I think we could do with some rest," Solo said into the deafening silence after Duo's words.
It took a moment for Carl to look away from Duo.
"Of course," Carl agreed, looking at Solo. "I'll see to it that everyone is found bedding. My quarters are, of course, at your disposal." He winced and then looked at Duo. "My prince."
Without another word he stalked from the room, Hilde jumping up to follow him.
"I doubt the Mysians will attack again in the next few hours," Solo said to the rest of them, as if Duo and Carl's shouting match had never occurred. "Try to sleep. It's going to be a long day and night."
Duo stood up, ready to go and scrounge up something soft to lay his head on.
"Where are you going?" Solo asked him.
"To find a place to sleep?" Duo said, confused.
Solo pointed at the bed curtained off from the rest of the room.
"There's your bed."
Duo frowned.
"No, you sleep there."
"No, you are the heir. You rank higher than I do."
"And yet you're giving me orders," Duo muttered, earning a smirk from Solo.
His brother squeezed his shoulder.
"You did well, little brother. You've the real makings of a king."
With that, Solo, Quatre, and Alex filed from the room. Heero and Trowa started to follow.
Duo waited, anxious for them to leave so he could sneak out of the fort and destroy the bridge. He figured that if he could remove as many obstacles as possible to Carl and Solo's arguments then they would be able to work out a plan to save all of the innocent people hiding in the fort.
Heero and Trowa paused at the door and exchanged a look before turning back to Duo.
Heero sighed.
"What are you planning?" he demanded.
Duo couldn't keep the surprise off his face.
"Huh?"
"That look on your face – you're planning something," Trowa clarified Heero's question. "What?"
Duo debated his chances of getting out of the door before either man could stop him and realized that they were slim to none. And there was no way they would let him to what he was thinking of.
"Uh… nothing, really. Just… tired. Thinking about getting some shut eye."
Trowa smirked.
"Mind if we join you then?"
Duo scowled. There were only a few hours left before dawn, and if he wanted to get this done he would have to move quickly. He didn't have time to stand here and argue with these two.
"Yeah, I do. Now would you please –"
"You're a terrible liar," Heero interrupted him. "What are you planning?"
Duo rolled his eyes and looked between the two of them. Both men met his gaze, and it irritated him just how self-confident they were.
"Fine. I'm going to destroy the bridge. If I can do that now, before dawn, then –"
Trowa sighed loudly and held up a hand in Heero's direction.
"Don't say it. We're all going to die. I know."
Heero glared at him and then turned back to Duo.
"Where do you think Tsubarov kept the saltpeter?"
Duo frowned.
"I don't… you're not going to fight with me about this?"
"Would you rather we did?" Trowa asked in amusement.
"No." Duo looked between them, trying to figure out how this could be some plan of theirs to trick him into trusting them before they tied him to a chair or something.
"The bridge?" Trowa reminded him after a moment.
"Right. The saltpeter – if we can just get a few charges to the bridge then we can blow the damn thing up. Tsubarov was crazy about using saltpeter. They keep a stockpile here for mining – but he'd planned on using it for military purposes. Crazy bastard – most foul human being I've ever met – but he was also a genius."
"It's dangerous to keep something like that inside the fort," Heero mused.
"Sure, but Tsubarov was also trying to sell some of it off – he'd need it close by."
"The armory?" Trowa hazarded.
Duo shook his head.
"Too many people have access to that. No, he'd keep it somewhere that – bastard," Duo muttered as he realized where Tsubarov would have kept it.
He led the way out of the room and towards the dungeons, Heero and Trowa close behind him.
Sure enough, at the back of the cells, stacked behind a few crates, were three barrels of saltpeter.
"How are we going to get it to the bridge?" Heero asked.
"Float it?" Duo suggested with a shrug. "If we can get it down there, kill however many Mysians are guarding the bridge, and the light this thing we should be in good shape."
"Good shape?" Trowa echoed. "We'd still have to swim upstream to get back to the fort – all of this in the freezing water – and we have no idea how many guards there are."
"You're right. We should just let the Mysians slaughter everyone instead."
Heero rolled his eyes.
"Fine. We'll do this." Heero hefted one of the smallest barrels.
Strangely they were ignored as they made their way back through the main compound of the fort, down to the mess, and then into the secret tunnel. There was enough activity tending to the injured soldiers and it was late enough in the night that those not occupied were asleep.
When they made their way through the tunnel to the other side, Duo couldn't help but shudder at the thought of getting back into the river. He drew a deep breath and jumped in.
He looked over his shoulder and saw both Heero and Trowa jump into the river as well.
"We're not doing this again," Trowa told Duo as he swam past. "I don't care how many times you beg – as soon as we leave this damn fort we are never going swimming in a river in the middle of winter again."
Duo couldn't help but chuckle at that.
Trying to stay near the shore, the three of them allowed the current to carry them downstream to the bridge.
The guards stationed by the bridge had gathered around a fire several yards away from the bridge, and in the dim glow Duo could make out half a dozen of them.
"I'll try to draw their attention while you two set this up," Duo said.
Heero snorted.
"Try again."
Duo scowled, though it was doubtful Heero could see his expression in the dim light.
"What do you mean?"
"I'll distract them and Trowa will help me take them out, then we'll set the charge."
Duo knew it was useless to argue with Heero over this. In the long run, it didn't even matter – they were here, they were going to destroy the bridge.
"Sure. Fine. I'll just stay here and be useless," Duo muttered.
"We could use the extra blade," Trowa pointed out.
"We're not endangering his life for no reason," Heero argued.
"Yeah, let's stop talking about him like he's not here, too," Duo suggested and then, without waiting for either to respond, climbed out of the water onto the rocks near the bridge.
Heero and Trowa scrambled after him, Heero storing the barrel near the side of the bridge before rushing ahead of Duo.
"We need to do this as quickly and quietly as possible," Trowa muttered to the two men, "if they manage to alert the rest of the army things will go very badly."
Heero nodded in agreement, drew his sword, and then rushed towards the guards. Trowa followed him a moment later, charging the other side, and Duo decided that, even though Heero hadn't agreed with him, Trowa was right – they needed his help in this.
By the time he reached the group, Heero had taken down one guard and Trowa two, but the other three had caught on to the fact that they were under attack and were fighting back.
Duo managed to catch one by surprise, taking him from behind as he turned towards Heero and Trowa.
Trowa was battling another guard, clearly the only one with any skill with a sword.
The sixth guard focused his attention on Duo, swinging his sword wildly and forcing Duo to back up to avoid being struck by it. Heero immediately charged at the man's back, taking advantage of his attention on Duo to strike from behind and kill him in a single blow.
"Thanks," Duo told him.
Heero smirked slightly.
"It is my job."
Duo found himself grinning back, but then a shadow loomed over Heero's shoulder. Duo reacted without thought, leaping forward and shoving Heero out of the shadow's path just in time to feel the sharp sting of metal biting into his chest.
He forced himself to ignore the pain and stabbed the man in the neck.
"Where the hell did he come from?" Heero demanded, addressing Trowa as the Sentinel walked over to them, breathing heavily as he sheathed his sword.
"The bridge. I didn't see him before."
They both turned to look at Duo.
"Are you alright?" Heero asked him.
Duo resisted the urge to feel his chest.
"Yeah." The cut didn't feel very deep – it had been a long, diagonal slash from his left shoulder to his right side – and in any case, there were more important things to deal with at the moment. "Let's get this finished so we can go for another swim. It's too hot out here."
"Never again," Trowa muttered.
"I promise," Duo assured him with a smirk.
"I might have been wrong about all of us dying after all," Heero added to their banter a few moments later after they had liberally coated the bridge with the saltpeter.
"It happens on occasion," Trowa pointed out. He used the Mysian's campfire to light a torch and then passed it to Duo.
"Want to do the honors?"
Duo took the torch from him and then hurled in through the air. It landed on the bridge and a moment later the entire structure exploded into smoke and flames.
"We should get back before the Mysians get here," Heero said after they admired the destruction for a moment.
Reluctantly, the three men waded back into the river, keeping close to the shore and using the rocks to help pull themselves upstream against the current.
The icy water pushed against Duo, seeming to fight his every movement, and the wound across his chest seemed to draw the cold even further into his body, until each breath Duo drew became a struggle. And then it became impossible to move anymore, or to even breathe. Everything went dark, and Duo fell into a void of icy blackness.
Duo woke up surrounded by heat.
It felt like he was under seven layers of blankets, and he could feel the hot, naked press of a body against his back and another against his front. It felt like heaven, and Duo instantly distrusted the sensation for that very reason.
He started to move, trying to free himself, but an arm came around his waist from behind and held him in place.
"Relax, you're safe," Trowa's rich baritone voice soothed.
"The – what happened?" Duo hated that he had to ask.
Trowa pulled him tighter against his body, and rested his chin on the curve of Duo's neck. It felt incredibly intimate, that point of contact, and Duo shivered.
"Well," Trowa begun, "you decided to be a lazy asshole and passed out in the middle of swimming back to the fort, so Heero and I had to tow you along. When we got back here our absence had been noted… and the sight of me carrying your bloody body through the mess hall definitely put a few people off their breakfast. You do realize that it's Heero's job to protect you and not the other way around, right?"
"So I'm just supposed to let him get stabbed in the back when I can do something about it?"
"Almost dying yourself isn't what I would call 'doing something about it,'" Trowa said mildly.
"I did not almost die. It was barely a scratch and –"
"We need to work on your definition of scratch," Trowa muttered, "but you're right. It wasn't that bad – except that you were nearly hypothermic already and getting back in the river, with your blood loss, was probably not the best thing to do."
Duo stared at the broad back in front of him, assuming it to be Heero, and assuming that the other man was either asleep or had decided not to talk to him again.
"It worked, though, didn't it?"
"Yes, and the free workers are gathering their things and preparing to cross as soon as it's dusk."
"And Heero's okay, so it was worth it," Duo said, hoping to put an end to the lecture on personal safety.
He could feel Trowa smile against his neck and then the press of the other man's lips against his shoulder, the sensation scorching him.
"Your eagle was beheaded," Trowa murmured against Duo's shoulder.
"What?"
Trowa's hand moved across Duo's chest, making him aware of the bandage wrapped around it, and came to rest over his heart.
"Your wound makes it look like his neck was severed."
Duo snorted a laugh.
"Good." He looked over the back in front of him again. It felt amazing to be this close to Trowa, secure in his warm embrace, but he wished that Heero was closer, pressed against their bodies and part of this.
"Heero's pretty pissed at me, then?" Duo asked in a near whisper.
"Not really. But when Solo's finally done yelling at him for endangering your life and trying to destroy the Theran monarchy he might feel differently."
"That's not Heero," Duo concluded.
"No," Trowa agreed in amusement. "That's Carl."
Duo couldn't help but immediately tense up at the realization and moved away from Carl's back, even closer to Trowa.
"He's not about to kill you after he spent so much time trying to keep you alive," Trowa chuckled.
Duo started to piece things together. Trowa had referenced his scar and –
"Who saw me? Who saw it?" He asked, feeling a lump of terror build in his throat.
"Hilde and Carl," Trowa said, "Heero bravely sacrificed himself to Solo's wrath and got him and Quatre out of here before we got you undressed."
Duo didn't know which would have been worse – having to face the disgust in Solo's eyes or seeing that look from a man who already thought he was worthless scum and deserved to die.
With a sigh, Carl rolled over onto his back and turned his head to look at Duo.
Yet there was no disgust in his dark gaze. If anything, Carl was looking at Duo with respect.
Duo frowned in confusion.
"And we'll gladly go to our graves without ever telling a soul about it," Carl assured him, "but you've no cause to be ashamed of it. Of anything," he added with a thread of anger.
"I'm dreaming all of this, aren't I?" Duo asked Trowa.
"If you are then I'm a bit disappointed," Trowa said, "when I dream of naked men we're never doing anything as mundane as talking."
Duo felt his face flush as his dreams of Trowa and Heero came to mind.
"Why are you even here?" He asked Carl.
The soldier frowned.
"Trowa already said – you were nearly hypothermic. After we got your wound bandaged we needed to get you warm. Hilde and I tried to get your body temperature up."
"Hilde?" Duo repeated and tried to look around for her, wondering where in the bed she was hiding.
"We switched as soon as I wasn't an icicle anymore," Trowa told him.
Duo nodded in appreciation of that. He would have been mortified to wake up between Hilde and Carl.
"I owe you an apology," Carl said after a long, tense moment of silence. "I was narrow minded and I should have respected you."
Duo sighed.
"You didn't know who I was, so there's no need to apologize about it. This whole Prince thing is new to me, too, sort of and –"
"No, that's not what I'm talking about." Carl rolled over so that he was facing Duo. "I'm talking about eight months ago. I listened to Tsubarov even when I knew he was lying and I didn't listen to you, even though I knew you were speaking the truth. It is my fault that that boy died and I will go to my grave regretting that. I should have judged your actions, and not your appearance, and I should have realized that you were an honorable man." Carl paused and swallowed hard. "All the same, if I had listened to you and let you take that boy's punishment then you'd be dead now, Tsubarov would still be alive, and all of these people would be doomed to terrible deaths. So… I'm sorry, but I'm also not."
Duo was saved from commenting by the door opening. Solo, Quatre, and a very somber Heero walked in.
Solo's face was twisted into a grimace, which eased slightly when his blue gaze met Duo's.
"You're alive."
"I seem to be," Duo agreed with a slight smirk. He looked past Solo to Heero, but the soldier's face was very carefully blank.
Solo nodded.
"Captain, your men –"
"Of course, My Prince." Carl rolled out of the bed and started to dress.
Solo's eyes became fixed on the spot where Trowa's hand rested over Duo's heart.
"I'm sure my brother is warm enough, now, if you have other things to be doing?" Solo suggested, his eyes narrowing into an icy glare.
Duo felt Trowa tense behind him.
"Actually, I'm not," Duo said and settled back against him, pulling the blankets up to his chin so that Solo would stop glaring at Trowa's hand.
Carl, now dressed, looked between everyone, clearly reading the tension in the air.
He looked like he wanted to say something, but instead he just sighed and left the room.
Solo's jaw clenched tightly but then he shook his head.
"Very well." Solo sat down on a stool in front of the fireplace. "As soon as we return to Antioch, Trowa, you will leave the palace and return to Kos. You may assure Sylvia that our kingdoms will always be friends and allies, but you, son of Ios, are no longer welcome." Solo turned slightly, not quite facing Heero, but clearly addressing him now, "and Heero will be transferred back to the army. It is clear that he is unfit to guard this family."
"What? No!" Duo sat up in the bed and glared at his brother. "I'm alive, aren't I?"
"And once again you almost died!" Solo shouted back at him. "You are the future King of Thera and these two are encouraging you to –"
"Encouraging me? They argue with me at every turn! And –"
"You almost died for him, when it's his job to die for you!"
"I'll die for whoever I want and his job isn't to die for me it's too protect me – which is what he was doing!"
"If he was protecting you then you never would have left Antioch to come on this mad journey and you never should have been at that damned bridge and –"
"And it's my damn life! If you want me to be your king then this is what you get! I'm not going to sit back on my ass while other men, good men, die for me!"
"You have to! It's their job to die for you!"
"No, it isn't. Their job is to fight to keep Thera free, but there's no point in them laying down their lives for someone who's too much of a coward to be willing to do the same."
Solo's eyes narrowed even further.
"A coward? You think I'm a -"
"Not you. Me. I'm the coward."
Quatre snorted.
"If you're a coward then who the hell needs heroes?"
"Staying alive doesn't make you a coward. Your job is to lead this country, and you sure as hell can't do that from the grave." Solo looked between the three of them. "I don't know what the hell has been going on between the three of you, but it will end. Now."
"You can't do this, Solo," Duo said.
"You aren't the king yet, little brother, and until you are it's my duty to protect you. I will not put your life in jeopardy by allowing these two any influence over you any longer."
"They're the only ones I trust, Solo. The only ones who know me. Send them away and I will have no one."
"You don't need them," Solo growled.
"No, but I want them," Duo argued, making the decision that he did. Whatever it was that Heero and Trowa had offered him earlier that night – he wanted that, and he would fight for it.
Solo started to shake his head, but Quatre laid a hand on his shoulder.
"Solo," his voice was a soft command. "Heero is the most loyal soldier in all of Thera. No one could protect Duo better."
Solo bowed his head for a moment and then sighed.
"Very well. But there will be no impropriety."
"Impropriety?" Duo echoed in disbelief. "What the hell are you talking about?"
"If Heero was thinking with his head instead of his dick then none of this would have happened!" Solo snapped. "Alex and Trant will guard Duo from now on, but you may remain as the Captain of the Guards if no other blunders occur."
Heero's face was like a wall of stone, it was so blank and still.
"And Trowa?" Duo bit out.
"I'm sure Sylvia has uses for him in Kos." Without another word, Solo rose and swept from the room.
Quatre shot Duo a look of sympathy before leaving as well.
Silence stretched between the three men, taunt and painful.
"How are you?" Heero finally asked Duo, his voice emotionless.
"I'll be fine," Duo said, wondering just what fine could even mean after this.
Trowa pulled away from him and climbed out of the bed. Duo watched as he silently dressed. He caught Heero also watching the other man, and there was a raw pain in his eyes that made Duo's eyes sting.
This was his fault. These two men had been together for ten years, and because of him they were being separated and diminished. He had nearly cost Heero his career, and because of him Trowa was now banished from Antioch and from his lover. And from Duo.
Trowa pulled on his trousers and fastened them at his waist. He reached for his shirt, dangling from the mantle over the fireplace, but stopped in the middle of the gesture and seemed to freeze. His shoulders slumped and he drew in several loud, ragged breaths.
"Damn it all to hell," Trowa muttered. He looked up at Heero and smiled sadly. "I knew we should have left him tied up and gagged at the palace."
Heero nodded slowly but remained silent, his face still painfully blank. Trowa sighed and crossed the room to him and took his head between his hands.
"You've made my life worth living, Heero," Trowa told him, his voice a hoarse whisper. He kissed the other man, and Duo had to turn away from the sight.
He had destroyed this, just as he had ruined every other good thing in his life. Duo's mere existence seemed to be a guarantee of doom and disaster.
A few moments later the bed sunk as Trowa sat down on it, now fully dressed. He waited until Duo met his gaze before speaking.
"I had fun in the wagon, too," Trowa told him softly.
Duo stared at him in shock. Trowa was joking about that now?
"Take care of him, will you?" Trowa asked Duo as he looked over his shoulder at Heero. "Sometimes he does stupid things if there's not anyone there to call him on it."
"I'm sorry," Duo breathed. "I ruined –"
Trowa silenced him with his lips. The kiss was strangely both gentle and firm.
"No, you didn't," Trowa assured him as he pulled away. "Besides, you were right. It was worth it."
He stood and strapped on his sword and collected his oilskin cloak.
"What are you – where are you –" Duo started to ask.
"I'll cross the river now and assist from that side. As soon as the free workers are safe I'll leave."
"You can return to Antioch with us, at least," Duo pointed out, remembering Solo's words.
Trowa shook his head.
"There's nothing for me there." His lips twisted into a wry grin. "Nothing I can take with me, at any rate."
"You're returning to Kos."
"No. I'm not going to crawl back to Sylvia like a whipped dog." Trowa looked over at Heero. "As Solo said, I am a son of Ios. I can make my own path. There are places I can be more useful than holed up in a castle in the mountains of Kos."
Duo frowned. He had no idea what Trowa was talking about, but the man seemed to have made up his mind.
Without another word, Trowa was gone.
"Heero –"
The guard cut him off with a gesture of his hand.
"You should dress. It's almost dusk and the free workers will start to cross soon. Once the Mysians realize what we're doing they will attack the fort with all of their force. It won't stand long."
Heero's words had no emotion in them, and it felt like a physical blow to Duo.
"I'll wait for you outside, and then take you to Alex. He'll protect you during the evacuation."
And then Heero left him as well.
The free workers were able to escape the fort almost without incident, using the guideline set up by Trowa.
At Carl's urging they destroyed the fort using the rest of Tsubarov's saltpeter stores. There was no reason to give the Mysians such a strong fortress, and it certainly took more than a few Mysians into the afterlife.
After a few hours of camping around fires to warm them, the refugees started their long, slow march back to Antioch.
Duo found himself practically tied to Alex during the return to Antioch. The guard seemed to spend every moment at his side, and the few times when he did step away Carl would take over, pacing Duo like a silent shadow.
Heero kept his attention focused solely on Solo, not even bothering to look at Duo, and it was clear that the guard had decided to take Solo's command to heart and to ignore Duo's very existence.
Trowa had vanished that first night, while the free workers huddled around the fires and the ruins of the fort at South Pass smoldered in the background. Not even the other Sentinels knew where he had gone to.