Wow, how lazy have I gotten!

Thank you for all the assurances and "good lucks." Hopefully, I do win!

I am unsure if this will be the last chapter or not, but anyways, on with the show!

-O-

Chapter 31:

To Cherish a Life

"Sai! There you are!" I heard Grimmjow call to her. "Everyone's look-"

For once, I felt somewhat relieved to hear that brainless panther's voice.

"Hey, are you sick? Sai?" I heard him even though the distance between us was gaining.

The hands immuring my arms were disconcerting. If only I was permitted to kill this woman who had caused all this.

But she would not want that.

Her face... I could only imagine what it must look like right now. There was that otherworldly feeling growing in me again.

At least Grimmjow was there. I resisted the urge to clutch my chest at the foreign discomfort.

"What the hell is that bastard doing!? Who the hell is that bitch?" Grimmjow roared.

This was a necessity right now.

"Mai."

Her voice...I had walked far enough, but I could still catch hold of her voice. It sounded different, as though it was bursting with something. I could not deny that I was still a bit angry at her rash attempt to save me from the Head Captain's execution, but the sound of her voice as it reached my ears right then was nearly enough to wash over me.

I did not understand.

It was just a voice. What control could one human woman's voice have over an Espada? Even her avoidance of me was enough to stir something. I just did not know what that something was. All that I am aware of is that she causes something, an irksome and numbing discomfort, that I could not easily will away.

"I'm so glad to have you accompany me here, Ulqui," a sharp voice penetrated my thoughts like lightning. "Of course you would choose me over that unwanted tramp."

She squeezed my arm as if she had the right to hold me as she did. Her fingers attempted to cocoon my fists, in what I could only assume as a failed instigation of human affection.

She dragged me deeper into the festival area. The lights around us was a fierce juxtaposition of how dimly I regard her.

"So what should we do first?" She looked up at me, but I did not feel any need to reciprocate. My surroundings were far more appealing.

My lack of an answer did not bother her.

"Wanna win me some prizes from the game booths?" she purred, "Hiro had never been able to win me anything. But I bet you can get me some great prizes."

"No," I spoke.

A glimmer of irritation shone in her abysmal eyes. Within a second, it was gone, clouded in mischief and false joy.

She made a sharp turn to the right towards the forest. I allowed her to lead. She paused when the sound of the festivities was distant and soft. My hands were freed from her grasp as I watched her tip toe up to my ear.

"Then," she whispered, "do you want to just skip straight to the main act?"

She leaned back to gauge my reaction. I returned her gaze dully.

She smirked. My attention dropped downwards when I noticed her hands rising. She began to widen the neckline of her kimono, exposing her skin.

"Do you like what you see?" she giggled.

I did not care about watching her finish her act. I looked her directly at her.

"Do you not have intimate relations with that male? Why bother with this folly?" I asked, if only to momentarily prevent her from advancing with her plot.

Confusion crossed her features. "Hiro? That boy will let me do anything I want. He can't stop me."

The woman stepped forward then, pressing her body flat against mine. It was revolting having such an individual in front of me.

"And I will have you too," she smiled.

A single ding rung in the air. It resonated like a weak echo until it finally faded. It was what I was waiting for.

"What was that?" she asked, scanning the area.

I reached into my pockets to retrieve the phone Urahara had lent me.

It's done.

- Urahara

I read the words before putting it away again.

"What is it?" she growled impatiently.

"Your petty game is over. Leave and do not ever show yourself to us again," I told her.

She laughed. "You think you're calling the shots right now? I say when the game is over, remember?"

When I heard the shower go on, I walked purposefully out of the room of the inn to deal with our unwanted guest. I had endured their presence long enough. It was time to eliminate them. Electricity surged through my appendages. The door slid to a close with a definitive thump.

As expected, just outside was the traitorous friend. She was twirling some sort of human device on its strap around her finger.

"You finally came out," she began as she leaned into the hallway walls, "I have a proposition for you. Blackmail, actually. You see, I managed to take some pictures of dear Sai and yourself in your quaint little room. I'm an excellent photographer, so I managed to take some shots that would cause anyone to see them to question Sai's purity. I mean, how scandalous would it be if it were to come out that angelic Sayuri Kimura was not an angel at all."

I dashed forward and managed to take hold of her device before she could react. I threw it onto the floor and firmly crushed it with my heel.

She giggled. "See, I predicted you'd try to stop me. But don't worry. The fun is still on."

She walked towards me as though I was her prey. I nearly scoffed. A disgusting human woman dared to make me her prey.

She placed herself directly in front of me. "I had already saved the images onto my various emails and sent the pictures to Hiro."

It was my move.

"Your demands?"

She grinned. "Be my mine. I will see you at the festival."

I felt her lips touch my cheeks like the slithering tongue of a snake. Then, she went down the stairs to return to what I assumed was her room.

I recalled my irritation. I wanted to kill, but knew I could not. I could have easily killed her then. Her partner could have been erased as well.

But the woman would disapprove.

It would have made her cry.

Thus, I strategized to destroy her ploy discreetly.

"Check your accounts," I muttered.

She took out her human device and began pressing buttons. With each button, her face noticeable paled even underneath all of her human face paint.

"Hah! Hiro still has the photos in his phone," she taunted afterwards.

"No," I challenged. "Everything containing the images has been hacked and rendered useless. Every image has been erased. Permanently. And should you attempt anything of this sort again, we will know. All your future accounts will be watched carefully. Any criminalizing evidence you collect that may be used in your favor will be deleted immediately."

Just as I finished my sentence, her phone began to smoke. In surprise, she tossed it out of her hands.

I walked away. "Game over."

I heard her stumble after me. "I hate her! I hate her! She takes everything from me. She took away the love of the teachers. She took my parents' love. She even took away my first love. I confessed to him and he said he preferred Sayuri. I want her to suffer! I want her to give back everything she stole!" she shouted.

I paused and turned to her. "So you bullied her because she had innocently taken the admiration of the one you cared for without even meaning to... What a childish act."

"It might be childish but to hear my first love turn me down because of her... do you know how painful that would feel!"

Her face was red with fury, and her face was scrunched with what appeared to be unaccepted defeat.

"And yet you throw that boyfriend of yours around to her in the hopes of hurting her. She had not meant to do anything of the things you blame her for. It is not in her character. You, on the other hand, had consciously used the person you are supposed to love to hurt the woman you hate. And now, you are forcing yourself on me to hurt her more. Sickening. You are the thief, because it was you that stole her friendship and trust and then stomped on them to satisfy your own worth."

"Of course you wouldn't understand. You look like you've never loved in the first place. Did you know that the pain of the first love always leaves a sore scar, no matter how much time passes? She gave me that scar," she muttered, more subdued.

"There is a simple solution. Go find someone who you love more. Now, be gone. I tire of all of your foolishness."

I watched her drop to her knees. She sobbed and wailed.

This was all her problem. She had no right to drag others with her.

I made my way towards the booths. Her footsteps were no longer behind me. Just as I bathed in the glow of the lights, another familiar face paused beside me. He took one look at me, expression bewildered and then worried, before dashing off into the woods where I had just come from.

Foolish humans and their so called love.

It was apparent that it was a strong emotion that can drive anyone that falls into its clutches mad. It was dangerous - probably one of the strongest weapons out there.

My feet headed in the direction of where I could sense her.

She was not far.

The booths cleared to reveal my so called comrades playing some sort of game that required hand eye coordination to knock down stacked cans. She stood behind them, barely watching what was going on.

Kurosaki and Grimmjow straightened up when they sensed my approach. Within seconds, Grimmjow had dashed off towards me, fist in the air.

I dodged to my left and continued walking towards her.

"Stand still so I can hit you, bastard!" he growled.

I dodged every blow he gave. He eventually stopped when I was within range of the woman. She was too close for any physical attacks to be made without jeopardizing her as well. At least that foolish cat was observant enough to be aware of that.

She was still turned away. I could only see the side of her cheeks.

"Grimmjow told us," Kurosaki spoke, "What happened?"

I replied, "It is none of your concern. It has been dealt with."

It was pointless to discuss a neutralized enemy. That woman would no longer interfere with their lives. I was sure of it. On the odd chance that she did, I would handle it easily.

"Dealt with how?" Inoue asked.

The Soul Reaper paled. "Please tell me you didn't kill her!"

"No."

By the red growing on his face, Grimmjow was growing impatient. "Spit it out!"

"Like I said, the threat has been subdued, so this discussion is a waste of time."

The woman moved for the first time. She left the group without a word.

"Pft. Still an idiot," the panther muttered to me. "Whatever. I'm gonna try some of these human snacks. Looking at you pisses me off."

He left in the opposite direction towards a line of food booths.

I felt a tug on my sleeves. I whirled to the source. It was Orihime.

"Ulquiorra, maybe it's time that you have an actual talk with Sayuri."

"Why?"

"Don't you think she would be hurt seeing you walk off with that ex-friend of hers!" Ichigo inputted. "I know you suck at these emotional things, but come on! It's pretty obvious that what you just did was an asshole move!"

"I am aware," I told them, "But it was a necessity. The traitor was a threat that had to be neutralized."

"By going on a date with her?" Ichigo retaliated.

Before I could come up with a suitable response, Inoue intervened.

Her eyes communicated a wisdom behind them. "Do you care for Sayuri, Ulquiorra?"

I mulled it over and analyzed it from any angle I could find based on my short experience with her. She had shown me great benevolence in my injured state. She maintained my survival a secret from the Soul Society even when she was imprisoned. She had given me a present during a major human holiday. She had risked death in an attempt to save me from execution. She had only shown me the kindness that is her character.

"She is a comrade," I concluded.

For some inexplicable reason, Kurosaki slapped his face with his own palm.

I continued, "As a comrade, I would say that I do care for her. By definition, is that not what comrades do?"

Inoue smiled. "That's a start."

"A start that's miles away from the finish line," the Soul Reaper muttered under his breath.

"As a comrade, you owe her an apology for doing what you did - even if it was to protect her. To her, all she saw was you running off with a friend that betrayed her. In her eyes, you betrayed her, too," Inoue elaborated.

"I committed no such betrayal towards her, but your rational is sound," I forfeited.

I felt Inoue hug me then. "Good luck," she whispered to me softly.

It was easy to find her. Detecting her presence had become as natural as seeing. She was at another booth, tossing some sort of ring onto a wooden stick. She managed to land one but missed everything else. When she was done, her shoulders were shrugged as she gave a large black animal doll a quick glance.

I came forward to the game attendant.

"I would like to enter this game," I stated.

He handed me three plastic hoops.

The woman stared at me as I took position in front of a wooden peg.

"What are you doing?" she asked. It was the same soft voice but it was laced with a taste of anger and perhaps bitterness.

"Winning," I replied bluntly.

I tossed one hoop after another and they easily went onto the peg. Human games were so mundane and lacked difficulty.

"Congratulations, sir!" the attendant sounded out. "Please come this way to select your prize."

I went to the far left side of the booth to the black doll she had been eyeing. It was a large black bear-like creature with green eyes with a fur that was appeared too soft to be realistic.

"That one," I told him.

"Good choice sir!" he exclaimed with false cheer.

The attendant went to retrieve it and handed it to me.

I made my way to the far right side of the booth where I sensed her, but she was no longer alone. Based on my history with her, I can definitively claim that she was a troublesome female who attracts trouble whenever I look elsewhere.

"Hey pretty girl. Why are you here all my yourself" a tall teenager whistled at her.

"You're welcome to join us," his brunette friend smirked.

"Come on, it will be fun," a third one, the most muscular of the group, said as he slowly wrapped his hand around her waist.

Electricity ran through me again. I had to pause myself to make sure that there would be no human casualties.

She looked at them with the coldest glare she was capable of, but it looked somewhat out of place with the naturally soft set of her face. "Leave. I'm not interested."

Unfortunately, the first man did not believe her. I watched as he stood on her other side and wrapped his own disgusting hand around her waist. Her face twisted further into displeasure.

"I said no, you ingrate!" she said and then she did something that was different. I will admit that it surprised even myself. Her fist landed on one of the men holding her waist and a moment later, her fist also made contact with the other.

The brunette one got into a fighting stance as his two friends recovered from the shock of the punch. Her fists were too dainty to knock anyone out, but it was striking to see this slim, weak-looking human woman hold her own against three men.

"You bitch!" the tall man cursed. He spit out some blood before dashing towards her.

She was already in the fighting stance that I had taught her. I intervened before the man made contact with her body. He had already touched her waist and that was already beyond his limits. I sent a weak jab behind his neck, which was enough to render him unconscious without causing permanent damage to his physical system. Before his friends could react, I moved behind them to render them unconscious as well.

Quickly, I grabbed her hand and flowed into the crowd before the scene could sink into minds of the spectators. Unwanted attention would be problematic and disagreeable.

When we were on the other side of the festival grounds, I guided her to sit down onto a bench.

"Here." I handed her the doll.

Instinctively, she took it before she could think it over.

I took that chance to tell her to wait. I quickly located the nearest food vendor and bought ice. When I returned to her, she was still staring at the toy I had given to her.

I kneeled in front of her and grasped her left hand in mine.

She hissed.

Because we were at the very edge of the event, there was little light around us. Yet, my eyes could see it all. Her knuckles were red. Her jaws were clenched, and her lips were pressed into a thin line. She did not meet my eyes, either - all signs that she was in pain. As usual, she was attempting to bear that pain on her own while simultaneously trying to prevent those around her from detecting it. She was becoming too predictable.

I carefully placed the bag of ice on top of her knuckles. Her left hand was chilled by both the ice over it and my hand that remained under it.

"These hands were not made to fight," I told her.

"...I ...I was angry," she admitted. "Besides, I wanted to fight for myself this time. It's pitiable how much I have to rely on all of you to save me, don't you think?"

"Do you not like having us around?"

"No...," she answered. "I love all of you. My precious friends."

Love. It was that word again. Of course she would be capable of it. I doubt I would ever be. How could a hollow, a being that formed from the loss of a heart, be able to love?

It was nonsense.

"Are you still angry now?" I favored changing a subject that I could navigate.

I waited for her to speak, but I knew she would not. I could sense that her anger had faded somewhat, but it was still there.

"Speak."

She took back her injured hand then, causing the ice to drop onto the bench. She clutched her injured hand to her chest.

"I will not do as I am told just because you ordered it," she whispered. "You've been doing as you pleased without the least bit of thought for your friends, even if you believed that it was all for our sake. And now, you think you have the right to order me?"

"I am not ordering you," I said calmly.

"Then what are you doing?"

"Attempting to make sense of your thoughts."

"I've been telling you my thoughts!" She breathed in.

Afterwards, her voice became gentler. It was still fiery but she had managed to calm herself a bit. "You know how much I and everyone else opposed your attempt to save us by agreeing to be executed and yet you refuse to refrain from doing it ever again."

"Will you not let that topic go?"

"You said you wanted to make sense of my thoughts, so I'm giving them directly to you unfiltered," she stated.

I mulled it over. "Proceed."

"And you knew how much pain Mai and Hiro put me through. You were there on that day! And yet you come here with Mai as your company! I'm angry at you!" Her words grew more rapid towards the end but they were not loud.

I hardened my gaze. "My methods are derived from what I rationalized as the most strategic route."

"So suicide is strategic? Betrayal is strategic? Nothing you've done has been strategic. They all placed you in trouble!" she retorted. "You are not telling me anything that I didn't already know. We are going in circles."

"Logic is all you need to know. Everything I have done is logical. Your actions, on the other hand, are purely emotional. In a world where survival is of the highest value, my ways will produce the desired outcome while your emotions will only lead to the most negative route."

"If it's all logic to you, I will be logical and determine that any sort of relation between us will not be harmonious. Our perspectives will always clash. My proposal: the erasure of all interaction between us to prevent any future discord," she declared, her voice growing softer and softer.

I ran her proposal in my head. She was emotion, and I was rationalization - two paths that will contradict at nearly all ventures. Her proposal was sound.

"Agreed."

There it was again, the tightening in my chest.

She stood up quickly and began to return to the festival. I did not have to turn around to know that Grimmjow was there waiting for her.

It was no longer my concern.

My ties to her are supposed to be erased.

We have opposing viewpoints.

A pool of liquid from the bag of ice began to trip down the spaces of the bench seat. The black doll sat before me, and I could almost feel judgment coming from its green orbs.

She was the embodiment of kindness and humanity and emotions. I was the embodiment of death and rationality. I had done what I had done because it was the most logical method.

...To save her.

My eyes widened.

That was not logical.

Shielding her.

Nurturing her.

Training her.

Saving her at the cost of my life...

Allowing myself to be blackmailed to protect her dignity...

Altruistic. Everything I had done was all irrational. I had acted all based on my own emotional response. If anything, I could say that what she had said was more rational than myself. The rational mind that I had prided myself to possess had become absent and was supplanted with her... and the confusion that she brought forth.

Had I sacrificed my own thought processes and molded them in such a way to protect her? All my thoughts now focused on her well-being and how best to secure her future.

Conclusion: I was no longer a purely rational creature. The emotions I had abandoned during my descent into a hollow had seeped back in without me even noticing.

I stood up and turned around in search of her.

My sight dimmed when I saw Grimmjow's face nearing hers.

He had no right to touch her.

I could feel my mind go numb, but it was all instantaneous. I sonidod to their location, and before I could realize it, the strings in my hands returned, causing my fist to land on my subordinates face. I lifted her and sonidod out of the grounds before Grimmjow could even stand.

There was no thought in my actions, just an urge to get her away from him.

"Have you lost your mind!" she exclaimed.

She was right. This was not something I would have done decades away.

She attempted to escape from my hold. It was futile; I held her tighter against me. She stopped moving. I cradled her face to chest to protect it from the wind.

When I reached the meadow she had frequented, I dropped her onto the thickest branch at the top of the sakura tree.

I needed to regain some control over my thoughts. Was this the result of emotions becoming involved? The loss of reason and reckless actions.

She scooted back until her back met the trunk of the tree. I knew she was mildly afraid of heights. As she sat there, she glared at me.

She nearly yelled, "How dare you! You have no right to do this!"

However, as I looked at her, the chaos in my head soothed as if she was a salve. A sense of calm came over me.

I advanced on her steadily. Slowly. The strings had returned and I felt their pull to be stronger than any previous occurrence.

"You agreed to break ties with me and yet you took me here!"

I allowed her to speak as much as she wanted. She had always silenced her own voice, so it was refreshing to see her speak her mind. Besides, hearing her, even if she was angry, was soothing me still.

She was the source of the turmoil in my head, but she was also the medicine.

She paused when I was within a feet from her. "W-Why would you go on a d-d-date with her!" Her voice was still strong but cracked. "How dare you try to die in front of me..." Her words were dying in her throat.

I lowered myself to kneel before her.

"Take me back to Grim-"

I had no reason why I hugged her then, only that I could now clearly see the betrayal she had felt come back to haunt her tenfold because of my doing. I could see that she could no longer control the anger and hurt that ran through her.

I could see her in all her vulnerability. She was trembling.

"She had taken pictures of us at the inn and was planning to use it to ruin you unless I agreed to go to the festival with her," I whispered as I held her.

The tears cascaded plentifully down her cheeks and landed on my haori. I could feel the tears soaking through.

"I had planned to get a hold of the incriminating images sooner but the hollow attacks had delayed that."

"I..." I struggled to get the word out, "I apologize."

Her arms wrapped around my torso, and her hands clenched onto my clothes.

She whispered, "Do you enjoy confusing me so much?"

I pushed her back a little to look at her face.

"You will have to clarify, because I still do not understand such a question."

She gave me a small smile and just shook her head. "It's alright. But can you tell me why you agreed to be executed for me and the rest of our friends? You still need to answer that... please."

It was not her sudden change of topic that gave me pause but the fact that I had not entirely comprehended my actions at the time either. When I had weighed all possible actions, it was the best scenario that I could come up with. I can now see that it was far from rational. A rational strategy would have been to leave the area immediately and allow her, Inoue, Kurosaki, and Grimmjow to take the fall.

Yet, I had done something that deviated from the basic core of hollows and volunteered myself to be killed.

The tears were still running down her now blushed cheeks. The emotion in her eyes was something I had always seen whenever I gazed upon them. Even when she was angry with me, it remained.

The strings, still strong and more persistent than ever, lifted my hand. The feel of her burning cheeks against my cool ones sent a foreign jolt through me. That burning under my skin now coiled within the center of my chest.

Looking at her, I was beginning to understand.

"I possess a lost life - an empty soul. It was rational to conclude that the lives of five people - hollow or human - exceeded the worth of my own," I told her softly.

My thumb wiped the crystalline path left by the last tear. Then, I felt her own hand against my cheek.

She gazed at me gently, that characteristic kind smile gracing her features. "To me, your life, lost or not, hollow or human, is worth hundreds of my own."

I gave her an odd look. "That is foolishness. My life will never be worth so much."

She shook her head. "It's already worth that much because I already cherish it. I... um..."

She cast her eyes downwards and then met my gaze once more. There was a fortitude and a determination in them like I have never seen before.

"I love you," she declared.

My eyes widened.

She continued, "S-So even if you think that you should use your life to save us. Don't. Bec-"

"Sayuri," I interrupted.

I could feel her freeze in my arms. "What did you say-"

I leaned my lips firmly but gently against hers. The feeling of it was otherworldly and beyond my reasoning. She sat frozen for only a second, but she gradually, albeit, shyly, returned the affection. Her lips felt like velvet. I cradled the back of her neck with one hand. My other hand held her waist to keep her from falling off the branch.

The burning under my skin had exploded. But I knew then. She was my answer.

The place where my heart resided.

I parted from her to allow her to breath, but I leaned my forehead to hears. Her face was a vibrant carmine, but I found her face to be all the more enchanting.

"You won't ever leave, right?" she whispered, eyes closed.

"I promise."

She smiled.

Holding her, I felt different.

Complete.

"I wish you were my first kiss," she muttered morosely.

"I am," I admitted shortly.

"Um... Hiro was..."

"A mere human boy did not beat me," I said, "Your first kiss was while you were unconscious after falling in the river."

I was aware that most humans kissed to show their affection - their heart. However, I saw no merit in it.

"I wonder what it is that humans feel when they commit this act," I uttered softly.

I leaned over her and felt my skin connect with her.

"So... you are my first kiss." Her smile widened at the revelation.

She opened her eyes, and at such a close distance, I could easily see the teal amidst her gentle blue.

I could feel my gaze softening as I looked at her. "And you are mine."

She pulled away and quirked her eyebrows at my declaration. "I thought you said you've been with other women before since you are centuries old."

"How gullible you are, woman."

"So... I'm your first?"

"I just implied that did I not?"

At her beaming face, the endless void, which she had caused to form boundaries, began to fill.

-O-

How did you all like it? I was really unsure about posting this chapter, because this seemed like the most OOC that I've ever written Ulquiorra. I was hoping that the previous chapters and his gradual emotional development had been enough to cushion his actions in this chapter.

Did you all like how his perspective was portrayed?

Did everything seem like how Ulquiorra would act and think?

Was it awkward?

Did it make sense?

If not, what do you think needs work?

How was Sayuri's dialogue?

Moreover, as I mentioned earlier, this may or may not be the last chapter. I might write an epilogue, but I am still unsure about that.

If this is the last chapter, thank you to all my readers, followers, and reviewers! It warmed my heart knowing that people cared about my story.

I love you all!