Chapter Seven: Lost and Found
After leaving the infirmary, Chris wanders the Promenade. Despite being surrounded by aliens and windows to space, his thoughts linger on the doctor's teasing.
I think she's attractive. So what? That doesn't mean I have a 'thing' for her.
As he walks, Chris' mannerisms broadcast the one-sided, defensive conversation in his mind.
Hell, all the female characters were attractive: Leeta, Ezri, Keiko, Kasidy… OK, there was Winn, but she was old and evil. So glad I don't have to meet that woman.
Chris stops abruptly, causing a Bajoran man to bump his shoulder.
"My apologies," the man says.
"My fault; Sorry," Chris replies as the man walks on.
Chris removes himself from the flow of traffic to continue thoughts.
Anyone who's 'died' wasn't just a character being written off the show. They really… died. Winn, Damar, Jadzia…
Chris blinks his eyes back into focus and finds himself under the scrutiny of a security officer across the Promenade. He decides it's time to move on, but not before attempting to put his nagging thoughts to rest.
She shoved a gun in my face for god's sake!
Grumbling and shaking his head, Chris resumes his wandering.
While attempting a self-guided tour of Deep Space Nine, Chris experiences sensations of déjà vu that are strong and unnerving in locations featured in the TV show. He finds himself completely at a loss in others.
A travel agency? A florist? A beauty salon? Now a Bajoran grocery? Sure, they make sense, but… why didn't the Prophets shove any memories of those in my head while they were at it?
Chris looks up from his PADD and scratches his head.
Wait… is that the same replimat I just saw, or is there more than one?
While exploring the Promenade, Chris has gotten turned around more than once.
The station being round doesn't help.
Paying more attention to his PADD, Chris slowly discovers the difference between 21st and 24th century navigation devices.
Whoa… this thing knows which way I'm facing, not just which way it's facing.
To confirm his observation, Chris rotates the PADD in his hands, spins slowly in place, then walks in a tight circle while staring intently at the screen. He begins to feel the weight of stares upon him and is quickly overcome with self-consciousness. He tucks the PADD under his arm and walks swiftly to another area of the Promenade.
The first impression I'm making is that I'm an idiot.
Chris decides to take a break from exploring to sit down and 'people' watch. He finds it simultaneously wondrous and discomforting to see so many aliens calmly go about their day. Humans, Bajorans, Klingons, and other races walk about. Some of the alien races he doesn't know the name for, but Chris remembers Julian's logic.
Did the Prophets really limit what they taught me to make it more believable? If that's the case, why is some of what they did show me so fuzzy?
Chris tries to recall when it was that he binge-watched the series on Netflix.
Idiot… I never did. But I remember like I did—some memories are clear, some are foggy. Was that intentional, or is that just how the brain works?
Chris closes his eyes and rubs his temples
I'm giving myself a headache! I was out of commission for a long time; maybe some things aren't clear because my brain has some sort of freezer burn.
Chris recalls the very vivid memories that surfaced during his morning encounter with Kira.
What was up with that? Was that a symptom of my new memories taking hold, or… is Julian onto something and my brain latched onto memories of her more strongly?
Chris sighs and quickly follows it with a groan.
Why do I have a feeling I'll be spending a lot of time on a couch in Ezri's office?
Chris opens his eyes to find a small group of Cardassians walking by—immediately distracting him from his thoughts. He remembers that the Cardassian people turned against their oppressive Dominion 'allies' at the end of the war.
That's right… they're 'good guys' now—I think.
Given the months-long gap in the memories the Prophets provided, Chris wonders if even the Vorta and Jem'Hadar have made peace with the races of the Alpha Quadrant. Odo left Deep Space Nine to rejoin the Founders, who rule the Vorta and Jem'Hadar as gods, specifically to cure their disease and change their view of solids.
I doubt they'd change their views so quickly. If I see any Jem'Hadar… I should run.
Frustrated by his dizzying thoughts, Chris decides to return to his haphazard exploration of the station.
As out of place as he feels, Chris finds that he draws far less attention than he'd expect. He's no longer spinning in circles while staring at a PADD, but he still feels like a tourist with how often he stops to check his map and gawk at his surroundings.
I might as well be wearing a fanny-pack and have a camera around my neck. Though… I guess Deep Space Nine is always full of travelers.
As was proven with his PADD, Chris stands out the most when confronting 24th century technology. He wonders why the Prophets didn't given him more insight on how to use a comm station, turbolift, or replicator. All Chris can remember from the show is that some things accept voice commands and some things require physical interaction. He tries to inconspicuously watch others use these devices, but it's quickly apparent that mere observation isn't going to cut it.
Eventually I'm going to have to demonstrate my ignorance.
Chris sighs and continues to wander.
Senta waits patiently as Kira looks over the PADD he just delivered. After several moments, the colonel groans emphatically.
"There's so much here," Kira says as she looks up at the security officer. "And you're sure this is everything?"
Senta responds with a quick nod. "Within the time-frame you provided, yes."
Kira resumes her inspection of the PADD, leaving Senta to once again stand quietly. After nearly a minute of silence, he musters the courage to interrupt her intense study. "Colonel… sir?"
"Hmm?" Kira looks up with distant eyes, seemingly oblivious to the officer's continued presence.
"The, uh, security call this morning? The phaser fire? We still haven't received…"
"Oh! That!" Kira rolls her eyes at herself. "I have a… a 'guest' on the station. It was unannounced. There was a misunderstanding. Everything's fine now. I'll, uh… I'll file a formal report later."
Senta blinks as he considers the line between authority and proper protocol.
Kira raises the PADD and nods to the door. "Thanks again, Senta. You're dismissed."
Senta abandons his reservations about accepting Kira's vague explanation for an excited call to security and weapon discharge on the station. "Yes, sir."
Before Senta even turns to leave, Kira buries her eyes in the data on the PADD.
Chris' exploration of the Promenade inevitably leads him past Quark's bar. Despite being early in the day, yells of "Dabo!" emanate from inside. Already feeling overwhelmed by aliens and 24th century technology, he decides against venturing inside. Chris isn't the biggest fan of attention, and Quark's bar has 'attention' written all over it.
Maybe later—much later.
Another, louder exclamation of "Dabo!" escapes the bar, close on the heels of a staggering human.
"I guess it's five o'clock somewhere," Chris quips to himself as he watches the intoxicated man stumble.
"Excuse me?" A voice behind Chris asks.
"Huh?" Chris spins around to seek the source of the familiar voice. "Jake?"
Jake Sisko isn't fazed by a stranger speaking his name. The son of the Emissary is known to practically everyone on the station. If anything, he's gotten more attention since his father took up permanent residence within the Celestial Temple. In the eyes of many Bajorans, Jake Sisko is no longer the son of the Emissary—he's the son of a Prophet.
"That's me," Jake says, offering a quick nod, "but… what you just said: that it's five o'clock somewhere? I've heard my grandfather say that—back on Earth. He said it was an old expression. Are you…?" Jake pauses to eye Chris closely. "Have you seen my father?"
Chris knows why he recognizes Jake, but he has no idea why Jake recognizes him.
"You know who I am?"
"Kind of. Not exactly," Jake answers impatiently. "Have you seen him?"
Chris is surprised by Jake's eagerness. "It's a little complicated, Jake," he says as he rubs his forehead. "I, uh… think I saw him briefly, but I haven't actually met him. Though… somehow… I know him?"
Jake's expression is an odd mix of hope and disappointment. "But you came from the past, right? The Prophets brought you here. Your name's Chris?"
"Yes, I…" Chris squints and cocks his head. "How do you know that? Did one of the others tell you?"
"Others?"
"Kira and Julian. They're the only ones who know… where I'm from."
Jake shakes his head. Chris is getting a taste of what Kira and Julian have experienced today: someone inexplicably knowing things about you. It's an uncomfortable feeling.
"No, I… I had a dream last night," Jake says. "At least, I thought it was a dream at first. I was fishing with my father. We were just… together for most of it—like we did before we came to Deep Space Nine."
Chris can tell that Jake enjoyed that part of his dream immensely.
"But after a while," Jake continues, "he started talking about the Prophets—and something he was working on. It's a bit jumbled, but I'm sure he was talking about you."
Chris' spirits jump. "Did he tell you why I'm here? Am I really here forever? Do you know why they changed me?"
Jake is taken aback by Chris' enthusiastic questions. Chris feels guilty as Jake's disappointment becomes more apparent—that he was hoping to hear more about his father, not answer Chris' questions.
"Sorry, Jake," Chris apologizes for his outburst. "This has been a bit crazy, to put it mildly, and so far… I don't have many answers."
Jake sighs. "He must've known I'd run into you."
"Why do you say that?"
"He was going on about some stuff I didn't really care about. I think it was intended more for your benefit."
"Ah."
"Before I forget," Jake says, "he wanted me to say… 'sorry about the bed'. What does that mean?"
"Uh…" Chris blushes. "I'm sure you'll hear about that fiasco soon enough."
"But…?" Jake starts.
"I'm not going to talk about it, Jake. At least… not now."
Jake huffs in disappointment.
"Look," Chris says, "I'm sorry. It's… embarrassing. Maybe another time."
Jake relents with a nod.
"Did your dad tell you what he was working on?"
Jake shrugs. "I think he was helping you. He didn't go into much detail."
"Do you know how I know your name?"
Jake rolls his eyes. "Who doesn't?" He immediately blinks in realization. "Oh, right… you're from the past. So, if you didn't talk to my father, how…?"
Chris taps his temple. "For whatever reason I'm here, your dad and the Prophets gave me a lot of information about this station—and the people here."
"Really? Like what?"
"Beyond names and faces, things like…" Chris tilts his head back as he searches his fake memories. "One time, you and your dad flew a light ship together."
"We didn't just fly it, we built it," Jake smiles. "What else do you know about my father?"
"Can I make you a deal?"
"Are you going to tell me about…?"
"The bed? Absolutely not. But I do have seven years' worth of memories up here we can talk about, and I'd love to know more about what your dad was going on about in your dream."
Jake and Chris have claimed a table in the replimat. Jake sips hot tea while Chris drinks from a tall glass of iced tea. Chris makes a disgusted face.
"Something wrong?" Jake asks.
"I should've asked for sweet." Chris smacks his lips and makes a subtle gagging sound.
"We can…"
"Oh, no," Chris interrupts. "I don't want to put you through that again."
"I'm sorry I couldn't find a soda—or whatever you called it."
"And I'm sorry I got frustrated. Besides, they're not good for you anyway." Chris takes another sip of his tea. "This is fine."
Jake chuckles. "It doesn't look like it's fine."
"There's going to be a lot of new things to get used to. I gotta start somewhere."
Jake stares at Chris for a moment. "I can't believe you're really from the past."
"Me either," Chris says after he takes another drink and puckers. "So tell me, what did your dad say about me? Did he tell you how long ago I'm from?"
Jake's expression darkens and he fidgets with his mug. "No, but he uh… told me you… died."
Chris struggles to not choke on his tea. "Died?"
Jake nods slowly.
Chris stares at Jake in shock. A flashback of pure white and intense pain prompts him to place a hand on his chest. "I had a heart attack."
Jake nods again. "He said the Prophets manipulated a lot of things, and a lot of people, to make him the Emissary. They started 'borrowing' people long before he was born. Most were put back but…"
"Why return a corpse," Chris says with a frown.
"I guess," Jake shrugs. "He said when you died, you… froze."
Chris stares at the ice cubes in his tea. "For 350 years."
"Wow," Jake blinks at the number.
"But I'm fine now. Why didn't they put me back now that I'm fine?"
Jake distorts his face as he tries to remember the words of his father. "I think the way he put it was… like a house of cards. Do you…?"
Chris nods "I follow."
"OK, so… if what they did to make dad the Emissary is like a house of cards, putting you back would make it all fall apart. They'd have to start all over again."
"They did it once…"
"Right, I remember, but… dad said that it would mean more people dying or… never existing. He was pretty upset that he didn't know what sending that one Bajoran back would mean. He thought putting you here would limit the consequences."
"I see," Chris nods as he considers the scale of the butterfly effect in play. "It had to be the future. It had to be after he went to live in the wormhole. I guess that's why there's a gap."
"A gap?"
"Yeah. The, uh… the 'memories' he gave me end when he went to be with the Prophets."
"That was…"
"A few months ago—according to Julian."
Jake nods.
"And the heart attack must explain why they did this," Chris says as he looks down at his chest and stomach.
"Did what?"
Chris looks up at Jake and shrugs a shoulder. "They… changed me—quite a bit."
"Really? What'd they do?"
"Let's just say I wasn't exactly… as fit as I am right now. They didn't just fix my heart, they fixed… pretty much everything. Maybe all this was further compensation for never being able to go back."
Jake shrugs.
"Anyway…" Chris says as he picks up his glass. "Let me tell you some of what I remember about your dad."
Jake and Chris spend a lot of time in the replimat. Chris shares the format in which Jake's father chose to share the massive amounts of information the Prophets fed him, and they laugh about the trouble that Jake and Nog used to get themselves into on the station. They talk long enough that they decide to share lunch.
"I wonder why my father didn't show you how to use a replicator?" Jake asks after they retake their seats.
"Mmm," Chris mumbles as he hastily swallows a bite of a turkey sandwich. "I've been thinking about that. None of the memories involve me—obviously. I think it must not've been possible to teach me skills with how they did what they did. I'm going to guess it's more a limitation of the brain than their ability."
"Sure," Jake shrugs. "And just so you know, some of the replicators on the station haven't been retrofitted yet. For those you'll be limited to voice commands—unless you can read Cardassian. Did the Prophets teach you that by any chance?"
Chris shakes his head. "Not that I know of. I guess I'll find out when I see some."
"It's all over the place. You should've noticed."
"Then I guess I can't."
"So, if you couldn't use a replicator, how were you getting around?"
"Hmm?" Chris questions with a full mouth.
"Have you used a turbolift?"
Chris chews and swallows while eyeing his PADD with the station map. "Kira brought me here. I've been… sticking to the Promenade."
"There's more to the station than the Promenade. I can show you later."
Having taken another large bite of his sandwich, Chris answers only with a nod and a thumbs up.
Jake smiles. "Looks like that sandwich turned out better than the tea."
Chris nods emphatically. "Mm-hmm."
The two continue to talk while finishing their lunch. After polishing off his sandwich, Chris leans back, grabs his stomach, and lets out a long sigh.
"You look beat," Jake says, still on a high from talking about his father.
"Yeah, I could use a break from… this." Chris makes a sweeping gesture with his eyes, referring to the Promenade in general. "Do you think you can teach me how to use one of those comm stations?"
"Sure, there's one right over here."
Kira is still pouring over the report Senta delivered when the comm system chimes.
Dammit. What am I missing?
Kira knows there's something important buried in the data but it eludes her. She drops the PADD in frustration and glances at the comm system speaker.
Why the hell aren't they talking yet?
"This button?" she finally hears Chris' voice say.
"Yeah, that's the one. Press it." Kira recognizes Jake's voice, but more distant.
"I already pressed it. What now?"
"Now say who you want to talk to."
Kira's frustration melts. She smiles and shakes her head as she pictures the two men fumbling with a comm panel. She knows she gets to hear every word they've said from the time Chris pressed the button to the time he spits out her name. The fact is a given because the system would not have patched it to her office otherwise.
"Umm, Kira Nerys?"
Kira laughs to herself and is grateful that was all the longer she had to wait.
"Yes, Chris," Kira says with a grin. "How are you holding up? I hear Julian let you loose on the station."
"I'm… managing. Jake's been a big help. Um… I've been up here for quite a while, and I was wondering where the best place might be to take it easy and… reflect on the day?"
Kira realizes that after their chaotic introduction and leaving him with Julian, she'd made no arrangements for Chris's stay. She's completely failed to address the basic needs of a guest on the station.
Doing a bang-up job, Nerys.
"I'm sorry, Chris. I should've already arranged quarters for you. I'll contact security right away and make sure they give you something close to mine. I'm sure Jake can show you the way to the security office. They'll set you up in the personnel system and show you your quarters—OK?"
"That'll be great; thank you, Kira. Chris out."
There's only a short pause before Kira hears Chris' voice again. "Did I say that right? Do I have to do anything else?" Kira can tell these words are directed at Jake.
"You've been holding the button this whole time?" Jake's voice responds. "A channel will stay open until one person or the other ends it with a button or voice command, but not if you're still holding that."
"Oh. Well crap. Bye!"
There's another hesitation before a beep indicates the end of the transmission. Kira chuckles before letting out a sigh.
As promised, Kira contacts security to give them instructions for Chris' accommodation. Despite his status as a civilian, she instructs them to issue him a combadge as well.
Turning from the comm display, Kira eyes the PADD resting on her desk. The lingering smile from Chris and Jake's clumsy communication fades.
Jake points over Chris' shoulder to security.
"It's right over there," Jake says. "They can teach you how to use a turbolift when they show you your quarters."
"Thanks for your help, Jake. I'm glad you got to see your dad."
Jake nods and holds out his hand. "Thanks. I just wish I'd known it wasn't a dream sooner. It's been nice talking with you, Chris. I'll see you around."
After a firm handshake, Jake heads off around the Promenade and Chris walks over to the security office.