Rating: K+
Characters: Kakashi, Sasuke, Naruto, Sakura
Pairings: None
Words: 723
3/1/2016
Loophole
"Surely there must be some kind of exception that can be made," Sasuke says, a little too evenly. It is clear that he still struggles to control the temper stemming from his absurdly unfortunate adolescence.
"Yeah, Kakashi-sensei! There's gotta be some way," Naruto whines as though he were still an adolescent.
Kakashi props his feet up on his desk. "I assure you, I have pored through the books in search of a solution, and none exists. You two will simply have to wait and take the next Chuunin Exam. Although," he pauses gravely, "considering the current state of affairs, that might not come for some time."
"How long?" Sasuke growls.
"Yeah, how long?"
Kakashi gleams. "I would guess at least another six months of rebuilding before the nations even think about it. Then, it'll take at least another six months to plan the thing. And, considering it's been years since the last exam, as well as the number of genin who gained enough experience during the war to take the exam, there might be too many entrants. We might have to cut off candidates based on time served," he says with an almost believable air of sympathy. "With the time you two took off from regular service, you're low on mission count. I suggest you guys pad your statistics by taking on as many missions as you can in the meantime."
"You mean I have to chase cats with this guy for a YEAR?" Naruto screams so loudly, his voice cracks. "I'm telling you, he just got back last week and he's already driving me nuts."
"And after being assigned trivial task after trivial task for the next year, then, we have to take a written test and fight a bunch of children?" Ever entitled, Sasuke continues, "Can't you write a new law or something?"
"There isn't enough time or manpower to get a bill like that passed in this day and age. More important matters of national security take precedence. In fact, I don't even have time to play with my dogs. Oh, perhaps that could be your next mission, to walk my dogs for me? They're very cute."
"You're amused." Sasuke says flatly.
"Well, alternatively, you two could remain genin for the rest of your lives. Have you any further questions?"
The boys shake their heads and shuffle out the door, grumbling. "Don't break anything on your way out! The cost for repairs comes out of your next paycheck!" Kakashi calls after them.
~xx~
A few minutes later, Sakura enters the office. Without knocking, of course.
Kakashi blatantly picks up a piece of paper off his desk and pretends to have been reading it. He looks up in mock surprise. "Ah, Sakura. Did you shred those files I asked you to shred?"
"Yes, and I have to say I don't appreciate being assigned menial tasks like that." Sakura walks over, swats Kakashi's feet off the table, and selects a different sheet of paper off the table, suggesting that if he is going to start reading now, he might as well start with the first page. "Couldn't you have asked someone else?"
Graciously accepting, Kakashi blandishes her. "You were the only one I could trust with the job. Those files contained very sensitive information, and I'm sure you wouldn't peek."
An electric flash envelops the scene in the window and is followed by a large boom from below. The floor shakes, cats scamper out into the street, and a couple people scream, though probably not so much out of shock as much as anguish that their paperwork has been put out of order.
Sakura narrows her eyes suspiciously. "What did you do?"
"Me? Absolutely nothing. It sounds like Naruto and Sasuke are a little upset about their next mission assignment, though."
Sakura recalls the contents of the files that her gaze accidentally brushed over after oh so clumsily dropping the folder in the stairwell. Page 352 of the Third Peace Treaty of Shinobi Nations, Section 6, Clause 19, concerning Chuunin Promotion. Pages 4, and 8-9 of the 3rd Amendment to the Official Jounin Selection Procedure. And unrelated, several receipts from Kakashi's barhopping adventure last weekend billed as work expenditures. She takes a moment. "That was dirty, Kakashi-sensei."
"I like to watch my kids suffer."
Sakura turns to hide the smirk on her face.