"I thought I might find you here."

Thomas looked up sharply, dashing a hand across his eyes as Joanna approached him. "You okay, Tommy?"

"I'm fabulous like always." Thomas muttered the satire thick. He squared his shoulders in an attempt for Joanna not to see what headstone he was currently sitting in front of.

Tara Knowles, the grave read. Loving wife and mother.

Joanna silently took a seat next to Thomas, brushing the dirt off the grave next to Tara's. "You're like her, you know." She said after a few minutes of silence.

"What?"

"Tara. You look like Tara. Everyone says you look like Jax but I don't think so."

"And you say that why?"

Joanna shrugged a shoulder, "You and Abel have the same eyes and hair but your face is different, I see Tara not Jax."

"Okay. And?" Thomas asked unsure of where she was going with this.

"And that is what made the difference today. It was the difference between you being the first one to smash Tyler's face in and you being the brother to talk down Abel but then backing him up even though his decision was poor." Joanna said offhandedly. Thomas frowned at her, she was kind of right. He wouldn't admit that out loud, but she was right.

Abel was wild, unpredictable, and all around hotheaded. Tyler wasn't the first person Abel had hauled off and hit. Wendy was constantly in tears over Tommy's older brother, most nights Abel was out till the early morning or didn't even come home.

But Thomas had always thought it was Abel just being Abel. Apparently, certain character traits ran through the Teller bloodline and Thomas had been lucky enough to side step them. Abel was lucky in a way he didn't understand. He remembered what Tara had been like and all Thomas had were just strange impressions every once and awhile.

Thomas could be walking through a store and he would stop dead in his tracks as some lady would walk by wearing the same perfume he remembered his mother wearing. But he couldn't draw her face to the forefront of his mind. Abel could describe what she looked like, but it was like chasing smoke for Tommy. It was always just out of reach and Wendy wasn't one to keep pictures of Tara around.

"I'm telling you this," Joanna continued as she watched Thomas's thoughts wander off into a direction of their own, "Because I wanted you to know you made the right decision today. And Abel won't say it but he's damn glad you saved his ass."

"I'm a Teller. Tellers have each other's backs, nothing more to it." Thomas said, standing up. "And your boyfriend better not forget that simple fact."

"Ex-boyfriend." Joanna corrected silently.

"You broke up with him?" Thomas asked turning back towards him.

"He insulted your father who was a former president of the very club that has kept my mother and I out of a poor house." Joanna stated also getting to her feet. "Come on Tommy, I'll take you home."

Thomas smiled at her and threw an arm around her shoulder, "So what was he? Three, two inches?" Joanna mocked disgust and anger and shoved Thomas away.

"I'll tell you about Tyler when you white biker boys stop lying about what eight inches is to my friends." Thomas threw back his head and laughed, Joanna's grin growing bigger by the minute.

Joanna followed Thomas into his house through the kitchen door. "Hi Wendy."

"Mom, what's wrong?" Thomas asked instantly. Joanna hadn't even noticed that Wendy was sitting at the table crying.

"Hi sweetie, it's nothing." She said running the back of her hand across her eyes, "I was just-"

"You must be Thomas," A deep voice interrupted. "I've heard a lot about you and your brother."

Thomas swiveled to see a man he had never seen before walking in from the living room. The man looked like he was Russian, maybe early fifties? The beard and tats made him look a little younger than he was probably was. "Who the fuck is that, Mom?"

"My name is Dave; it's nice to meet you Thomas."

"I wasn't asking you, now was I?" Thomas cut his eyes back to his mother, "Mom, who is this guy?"

"He's the man I've been seeing the last few months. We actually have something to tell you-"

"Where the hell is Abel? Does he know? More importantly, have you heard anything from fucking Nero?"

Wendy visibly winced at the name and Dave's brows turned down towards his ugly ass lips. "Nero?"

"It's a very long story, Dave."

"Nah, it's pretty short. My mother is married; now get the fuck out of my house."

"Thomas John!" Wendy yelled standing up. The chair hit the tile floor with a thud but Thomas held his ground.

When Abel wasn't here, he was the man of the house. When Nero left, Abel had entrusted him with that responsibility.

"It's obvious I'm not helping the situation here. Wendy, I'll call you later." Dave said picking up his jacket. Neither Thomas nor Wendy said a word till the front door closed.

"Where is Abel." Thomas asked slowly.

"I don't know, he stormed out a few hours ago." Wendy said moving to the sink. She wrung her hands before picking up the dish towel and starting to wash the blue plates they used for dinner.

"I'm going to find Abel, and Mom?" Thomas paused on his way out the door.

"Yes?"

"We are going to talk about this tonight as a family."

Anarchism... stands for liberation of the human mind from the dominion of religion; the liberation of the human body from the dominion of property; liberation from shackles and restraint of government. It stands for social order based on the free grouping of individuals. The concept was pure, simple, true. It inspired me. Lit a rebellious fire, but ultimately I learned the lesson that Goldman, Proudhom and the others learned. That true freedom requires sacrifice and pain. Most human beings only think they want freedom. In truth they yearn for the bondage of social order, rigid laws, materialism. The only freedom man really wants, is the freedom to become comfortable.

Abel sat the thick manuscript down in front of him. He had plowed through pages and pages of the text. When he had opened the book, a scrap of paper had fallen out signed by Opie Winston. The scrawled handwriting was for Jax explaining that he had made a copy of this book because it was something that should go out to all the SOA Charters.

The first few pages had been confusing; until it finally struck him that he was reading the words of his grandfather, John Teller. He leaned back, dazed at best, not really noticing the headlights that cut across the broken windows of the cabin.

"Abel!"

"Abel, where are you?"

He just continued to stare at the pages ruffling in the breeze in front of him. A hand on his shoulder scaring the shit out of him. "Abel!"

"Good god, Tommy. Couldn't have given me some warning before grabbin' me?" Abel breathed.

"What did you do to your ankle, Teller?" Joanna asked crouching in front of him.

"Fell through the damn floor board." Abel groaned as Joanna poked at the battered flesh. "Ouch, damn it! Don't touch it."

"Mom's worried about you, bro." Thomas said helping Abel to his feet, supporting his weight under his shoulder. "Can you ride?"

"I don't think so." Abel grimaced as he hobbled down the steps of the cabin.

"Hey what's that?" Thomas asked, motioning to the papers in Abel's hand. "It's, uh, just some old stuff I found in the cabin. I'll show you when we get home."

Thomas helped Abel to Joanna's truck, shutting the door on the passenger side, he held out his hand to Abel. "Keys."

"Keys to what?" Abel asked.

"The kingdom. No you moron, your bike." Abel narrowed his eyes at his younger brother. "Don't look at me like that. Would you rather we leave it out in the middle of the damn forest or have me ride it back?" With a sigh, Abel dug his keys out of his front pocket and dropped them into his brother's hand.

"Keep it under sixty, you brat. You get pulled over without a motorcycle license and Mom will kill me."

"Well in that case I'll promise to keep it over sixty." Thomas stepped back before Abel could smack him.

"We'll follow you, Tommy." Joanna said starting her truck.

A few minutes later, they were pulling on the main road. Abel rested his head against the window, hands still clenched around the manuscript. Joanna let the silence fill the cab of the truck for several miles as Abel gazed out the window. Finally he shifted, grimacing at his ankle.

"Why aren't you with Roberts?" He asked. Joanna glanced over at him before glancing in her review mirror.

"Because I came to find you." She said, watching with concern as he sank down into the seat. They were still about fifteen miles outside of Charming and Abel's voice had started to drift when he spoke.

"I don't know why." Abel said an accusatory tone in his voice. At the red light Joanna braced her elbow on the steering wheel and turned to study him. She liked Abel, she really did. But he had never shown interest in her, Joanna was just one of the guys with him.

"Why wouldn't I come find you? You're one of my friends Abel."

Abel crossed his arms and shrugged, refusing to look at her. "Sorry I kind of ruined your boyfriend's pretty face."

"Ex-boyfriend's face and it's quite alright. It needed some rearranging." Abel stilled and looked over at her. Did she just say ex? Abel just barely resisted the urge to give a shout of joy; he ducked his head to keep her from noticing his grin.

Then her tone registered, and his playful mood was gone. Abel's spine had gone ramrod straight.

"Wait. What did that bastard do to you?" Abel attempted to catch her eyes, but she seemed intent on looking everywhere but him. She shrugged a hand over the hem of her sleeves and pulled it down tight around her wrist, "I handled it."

"Joanna!" Abel yelled startling Joanna. She meet his eyes and wanted to shrink away at the look he was giving her. "What did he fucking do?"

"We were arguing and he just grabbed me a little harder than he meant to. I'm fine, Abe. His jeep, however, is not so fine."

"I'll fucking kill him."

"Please don't. I'd rather you not end up in jail tonight, you're already lucky the school didn't call the police to begin with."

"Wait, what did you just say about his jeep?"

Joanna smirked, her top lip curling up in a way that had Abel struggling not to lean over and kiss her. " I dug my keys into the side of his pretty little supped up four wheel drive, carved my name into his leather seats, took a Louville slugger to both headlights, slashed a hole in all four tires and maybe next time he'll think before he cheats." Joanna sang at the top of her lungs, doing her best to imitate Carrie Underwood.

"You're amazing. Anyone tell you that?" Abel said smiling. Joanna reached over and grasped his fingers. "Just you." Taking that as invite, Abel interlaced their fingers.

"Listen Abel, Thomas and I walked in on Wendy and some guy today…" Joanna continued, glancing nervously at him. Abel snapped his eyes shut, rubbing at his temples. "You gotta be fuckin' kidding me."

"I wish I was. Thomas threw him out of the house…Wendy is really upset. I just wanted you to know what you were walking into at home."

"Abel baby, what happened?" Wendy asked as he came through the door using Thomas as support.

"Just twisted my ankle, Ma. Nothing major." He reassured as he sat down at the kitchen table. Joanna closed the door behind them into the kitchen and moved up to his room and dropped his backpack with the manuscript in it. Coming back down, she touched Wendy's shoulder.

"He's okay, Wendy. Just being stupid like usual, a few hours with ice on his ankle and he should be fine."

"Thank you, Joanna." Wendy said pulling the girl into a hug.

"Of course. I better get going." She stepped into the hug Abel offered, and gave Thomas a similar hug. The two brothers turned identical sets of eyes on Wendy as the backdoor closed.

"Who the hell is Dave?" Abel asked. Wendy dropped her head in her hands.

"Why am I being questioned by my sons? He's the man I've been seeing."

Thomas couldn't even stay seated, "Seeing? What is that supposed to mean? Like dating? Are you two serious? Good god, Mom! You're still fucking married." He tore his fingers through his hair, looking at Abel for help.

"Still waiting for details, Ma."

"Yes I have been dating Dave. And it's serious. Also, the divorce papers got filled a month ago."

Abel's jaw almost hit the ground. He knew things were bad between Nero and Wendy but divorce? The two had always had a strange relationship. Probably because sometimes it was hard to get past the fact that Nero had been screwing Grandma Gemma before taking Abel and Thomas in. They had grown up calling him "dad". He had taught Abel how to play baseball, Thomas how to ride a bike, and taught them both to be men.

Lucius, Nero's son, had been a fun kid to grow up with. Both Teller boys considered him a sibling. It had taken a few years but finally Wendy and Nero had made the decision to get married. They were living together, raising three boys, and doing…well other things. It only made sense.

But three years ago, Nero had walked out. Lucius's health had gone downhill, the spinal disease turning dangerous. He died in November of that year. The last time the boys saw Nero was at the funeral. As far as Abel knew, the two were still in contact. Nero had claimed he needed some time to grieve Lucius and figure things out in Norco.

Three years seemed like enough time to Abel and Thomas. But this wasn't anything new. They had never had a long lasting male role model in the house. Wendy's boyfriends were usually drunk idiots, their real father was dead, Nero wanted nothing to do with them, and the guys from SAMCRO were usually too busy. So it didn't really bother Abel –or Thomas- that Nero was in Norco.

"When were you planning on telling us?" Thomas yelled. Wendy didn't meet her youngest eyes as she looked down at the table. Abel was being calmer than Thomas, which was something new.

"I've been trying for a while, baby. The right time just hadn't come up." Wendy said watching with concern as several emotions washed across Tommy's face. He opened his mouth, two emotions meeting and rushing through to the top of his list.

"Go to bed, Tommy. We'll talk about this together tomorrow." Abel cut his younger brother off before he could get one more livid word out. Stunned, Thomas took a visible step back. "What?"

"I said go to bed." Abel said quietly.

"Abel-"

"Now." It was a tone even Wendy would have obeyed. She watched Tommy's resolve shrink under the eyes of his brother. Before she knew it, her youngest was slinking up the stairs with a sulking look on his face.

It was in that moment that Wendy saw the exhaustion written clearly on Abel. Her son went from eighteen to thirty in a matter of minutes. The bruises were dark across his jaw, the shading purple coming in around his eye, and the nerve under his right eye was twitching. In another setting, Wendy would have been amused. Abel and Jax had the exact same stress tick.

"Mom, for the love of god, give me a straight answer." Abel said, running his hand through his hair.

"Honey, I know this is hard but-"

"A straight answer, Ma!" Abel's voice rouse, his hands coming out in front of him trying to get his point across.

"Okay." Wendy said slowly. "His name is Dave, I meet him at work, his wife died a few years ago and I think you and Tommy would really like him if you gave him a chance."

Abel leaned back in his chair, his eyes focused on his mother. He was thinking, Wendy recognized that look anywhere. "Are you happy?"

"Yes, I am happy with Dave."

"Then that's all that matters. I'll handle Tommy in the morning." Abel said shoving his chair back. He limped past Wendy to the stairs pausing before he went up, "Goodnight, Ma."

"Goodnight baby."

Abel knew Thomas wasn't really asleep. The brat was pretending though, with his back towards his older brother and the covers pulled up around him. Abel lowered himself down gingerly onto the side of Tommy's bed.

"Hey kiddo, I'm sorry I yelled at you."

Thomas didn't answer.

"I'm just as upset as you are about this Dave guy, Tommy."

"Yeah, okay." Tommy muttered, scooting farther away from Abel. Abel resigned from trying to talk to his little brother with a sigh, "Goodnight, Kiddo."

Joanna was in the middle of plowing through a ten page research paper. She had thrown aside writing her own paper weeks ago in order to help Abel write his. Editing the paper had taken a good deal of time, his writing wasn't that much better than it was four years ago. By the time her mother came home from the garage, Joanna was almost done. But whatever conclusion she was planning on writing was stopped when the phone rang.

"Answer that I'm about to take a shower."

Joanna glared at her mother's back, biting her tongue to keep from demanding just what her getting in the shower had to do with not answering the phone. In the end she felt a fight wasn't really worth it and crossed the room to the telephone. "Hello."

"You sound annoyed."

Whatever annoyance she may have felt evaporated at the sound of Abel's voice. "I knew it was you."

"Been sitting by the phone waiting for me to call?" Abel could practically hear her eyes rolling over the phone.

"I can hang up, you know. I also have a cell phone."

"That would require me actually knowing where mine is, darlin'." There was a tension in his voice that she wanted to ask about, but something kept her from it. Joanna knew Abel wasn't calling her to bitch about things at home. He didn't do that. Abel simmered in his emotions and thoughts and never told anyone.

"You timed this call perfectly. I just thought of a brilliant conclusion to that AP Lit paper."

"Well I try, I can't let you be the only A student there is." This time he was sure she was rolling her eyes.

"Are you selling brideges too, Teller."

"Jesus Christ, you're a hard chick to compliment."

The conversation went on this way, the back and forth teasing. They fell into a few silences, but neither of them wanted to hang up the phone. Joanna heard her mother getting out of the shower, heard her leave the house, she kept the phone pressed to her ear she went out to lock up. The house grew darker, the neighborhood quieter, yet she remained on the phone.

"What was in those papers earlier that was so important?" Joanna asked deciding to press her luck on how much Abel shared.

"My grandfather wrote a damn book about SAMCRO." Abel admitted, she could hear him rubbing at his headache. "Found that and a few journal pages of my father's."

"Are you going to let Thomas read them?"

"Yeah, after I do. The kid doesn't need his head all twisted up with stuff about Dad, especially after tonight."

"What happened?" Joanna asked gingerly , prepared for him to change the subject and she would roll with it. Her tone left the door open, Abel could talk if he wanted to but there was no pressure.

"Wendy and Nero filed for divorce and this Dave guy has me feeling a little weird. I don't know, Wendy still isn't telling me everything but my head hurts too bad to have pushed anything tonight." Abel wondered if she'd be mad if he told her hitting Tyler hadn't been all about Jax. It was because he was angry.

Angry at everything.

Deep down, he hated Nero, he hated Chibs and Tig and Happy, and he hated Tyler for how he treated Jo.

"Abel, go to sleep. You sound exhausted."

"Yeah I am. Thanks Jo." Abel hung up, flopping down on his bed. He glanced at the frame photograph of him and Jax. The anger was truly just a mask. Because past the anger, was a deep buried ache to have his father back.

Jax would be able to handle this.

Jax would have known what to do, and Jax would have supported him.

But Abel? He felt like he was drowning.