Ezra's POV
When I wake up in the small couch in the hotel room, I realize that my back hurts. My shoulders hurt too, and so does my neck. Now that I'm thinking about it, everything hurts. I wish I could have slept on the bed last night, but I know that would have upset Aria.
Aria. I poke my head up, and smile when I see her sleeping soundly on the bed. Every few seconds, she mumbles something softly, but I cannot make out what she's saying. Regardless of her sleep talking, Aria is a beautiful girl. She looks so peaceful in her sleep, and that's why I do not want to wake her up.
Deciding to kill a little time, I stand up and look through the well-stocked bookshelf at the back of the room. Like most children from well to do families, I learned how to read at a young age. Even though my estate was always stocked with books, I was much more interested in playing outside with the boys than I was reading. At West Point, we were required to read a variety of books, but I never found great pleasure in any of them. I guess I just wasn't a reader.
That changed when I was captured, and put in a Confederate prison camp. The only form of entertainment they provided us with were stacks and stacks of books, and I jumped on the opportunity to read as many of them as possible. Without those books, I would have been stuck on my bunk with nothing to do, and a million thoughts in my head. The words helped distract me from what was going on, and they were the only thing that kept me from going crazy during that awful year. Even though I'm out of camp, I still read frequently, and it still helps me keep my mind off things.
After skimming through the shelf, I finally decide to read, "Uncle Tom's Cabin", by Harriet Beecher Stowe. I've read the book multiple times, but it's easily one of my favorites. As soon as I open the book and begin to read, I realize that I'm not alone. I look up, and gasp when I see Aria standing over the couch.
"I'm sorry. I did not mean to frighten you, Ezra." Aria says as a guilty look washes over her face.
"You did not frighten me, Aria. Have a seat, please." I say as I gesture towards the empty space next to me.
Aria nods, before taking a seat next to me, and directing her eyes towards the famous novel. I presume she's heard of "Uncle Tom's Cabin" before. It is one of the most famous books of our generation, and it started a major abolitionist movement in the North. Many people argue that it contributed to the start of the war.
"I've read that." Aria tells me softly.
Huh. That is rather surprising. Not many northern girls are interested in reading books in their leisure time. Perhaps Aria read the book with a tutor? Yes. I'm sure that's where she read it.
"With a tutor?" I inquire.
"No. On my own. It was laying around my house two summers ago." Aria informs me.
"Y-You like to read?" I ask as my eyes grow wide with shock.
"Very much, Ezra. Momma taught me how to read when I was just a little girl. She wanted me to be able to read all the scriptures, but unfortunately I found them rather boring. I was more interested in reading books." Aria says with a slight smile.
"Would you read for me, Aria?" I ask as I hand her the paper book.
Aria nods, before taking the book from me, and beginning the first chapter. I love the sound of her voice, so I listen closely to the words she speaks.
" Here the door opened, and a small quadroon boy, between four and five years of age, entered the room. There was something in his appearance remarkably beautiful and engaging. His black hair, fine as floss silk, hung in glossy curls about his round, dimpled face, while a pair of large dark eyes, full of fire and softness, looked out from beneath the rich, long lashes, as he peered curiously into the apartment. A gay robe of scarlet and yellow plaid, carefully made and neatly fitted, set off to advantage the dark and rich style of his beauty; and a certain comic air of assurance, blended with bashfulness, showed that he had been not unused to being petted and noticed by his master." Aria reads, before she stops abruptly.
"What is it, darling?" I question.
"I've never met a slave before. I cannot imagine how unhappy they must have been." Aria says with a frown.
"Yes. It would be a sad life indeed." I say as I rest a hand on my wife's shoulder.
"Have you met a slave before, Ezra," Aria asks as her voice softens.
"Of course. My mother grew up in South Carolina, and all of my relatives on that side are plantation owners. Before the war started, I used to visit them every summer. I've met many slaves." I say with a nod.
"What was that like?" Aria asks me curiously.
Flash Back
I sit next to my eighteen year-old cousin Samuel in the dinning room, and take a long sip of my beer. I arrived in South Carolina yesterday, and today is my seventeenth birthday. Samuel's twin brother ,Robert, is in the other room preparing a surprise for me. I do not know what these two have up their sleeves, but I'm anticipating something grand since they've been talking about my gift all day.
"The surprise is ready!" Robert exclaims as he enters the dining room, and takes a seat next to his brother.
"Will you tell me what is going on already?" I ask, as I try to suppress an eye roll.
"Ezra, have you ever had a woman before?" Samuel asks me suddenly.
A blush begins to form on my cheeks, and I shake my head slowly. The only girl I can picture myself "having" is a girl from New York, named Jackie Molina. I met Jackie at a ball last year, and we've been pals ever since. Last week I took Jackie for a picnic out in the woods, and she let me kiss her soft lips. I felt like I was in heaven. I obviously couldn't "have" Jackie though. She's from a respectable family, so she's saving herself for marriage.
"You're seventeen now, Ezra. It's time for you to get some experience. What are you going to do when your parents marry you off to some northern virgin? You have to be the one who takes control." Samuel says as his tone turns serious.
"I know... I just don't know who to practice on. I don't know any loose girls in New York." I say with a breathy sigh.
"Follow us." Robert says with a wicked little smile.
I nod before springing to my feet, and following Robert and Samuel out of the dinning room. We walk down a long hallway, before stopping in front of a dimly lit room. Robert stops, before shoving me into the room, and closing the door behind him.
"Happy birthday, Ezra." I hear Samuel scream from the hallway.
Where the hell am I? I look around the small room, and gasp when I see a slave girl chained to the bed, and sobbing hysterically. Is this my present? They got me a slave girl to"practice" on? A nervous lump forms in my throat, and I slowly make my way over to the bed. I don't look up at the girl as I remove my trousers, and crawl into the bed. The girl's sobs begin to intensify, and I finally find the courage to look closely at her for the first time.
Oh my goodness. This girl is young. She's probably twelve years of age, possibly thirteen. Do my cousins honestly expect me to sleep with a child? It seems so... Cruel. Then again, she is their slave, and I need to get some experience. Without saying a word, I climb on top of the girl, and begin to kiss her lips. I close my eyes, and pretend like I'm kissing Jackie under that willow tree. I'm "having" Jackie. Not this little girl.
All the sudden, a stinging sensation washes through my lips. Did she just bite me? Who does this slave girl think she is? Absolute furry overtakes me, and I raise my hand to strike her. Before I can slam the girl, she speaks up for the first time.
"Please don't hit me, Mister." The girl she bursts into tears.
All the sudden, I don't see a worthless slave girl. I see a beautiful, and helpless child, who does deserve to be hurt. I lower my hand, and kiss her forehead softly. I'll be kind to her tonight.
"What's your name?" I ask her softly.
"A-Addie." She says with a whimper.
"Do my cousins do this to you a lot, Addie?" I ask her curiously.
Addie nods, and I let out a breathy sigh. Poor girl. I can't believe I almost... You know.
I lay in bed with Addie for a while, but I do not lay a finger on her. After a believable amount of time has passed, I slip out of bed and walk into the dinning room to meet my cousins. They both looks surprised to see me.
"That was fast!" Samuel exclaims as his eyes grow wide with shock.
"Hey, don't make fun of him. It was Ezra's first time with a woman." Robert says with a scoff.
"So, how was it?" Samuel asks me curiously.
How was it? It was the worst birthday present anyone could have gotten me. How can my cousins do that to a little girl?
"It isn't right." I blurt out suddenly.
"Huh?" Samuel asks as he furrows his brow in confusion.
"She's a child. Do you have any idea how much that must hurt her?" I spit out furiously.
"It hurts for every woman. Age doesn't matter." Robert says with an eye roll.
"But she doesn't have a say in it!" I exclaim.
"Ezra, are you going to take your wife to bed at night?" Samuel asks me suddenly.
"Yes. Of course I will. What does that have to do with Addie?" I ask as I furrow my brow in confusion.
"Because your wife will not have a say either." Samuel informs me.
"Why of course she will!" I argue.
"Really? You're going to ask her on the night of your honeymoon if she'd like to come to bed with you? Of course you will not! Do you know why? It's because that's expected of her. You Northerners think you're so pure and good because you don't have slaves. Well damn you! Look at your factory workers! Look at your wives! You're no better than us!" Samuel says, practically screaming.
"Factory workers? Wives?" I ask as I furrow my brow in confusion.
"Yes! Your factory workers are no different from our slaves. They work day and night for little reward. At least our slaves are taken care of. We teach them Christianity, and..." Robert starts to ramble.
"Our workers have a choice." I interrupt.
"What choice do they have, Ezra? If they don't take a job in the factory, their children starve to death! And your future wife... She won't have a say in marrying you. She'll come from a wealthy northern family, and she'll have to marry a man like you or she won't have any way of supporting herself. Your wife is no different from Addie." Samuel says as he crosses his arms over his chest.
"That's not true!" I say, becoming more and more angry.
"Really? Let me summarize the life of your wife. She'll marry you, go to bed with you at night, pop out half a dozen children, cook, clean, and then mourn for the rest of her life after you get killed in war. If that's not slavery, I don't know what it is." Samuel says with a smirk.
Absolute furry washes over me. How dare these men! Without thinking about the consequences, I stand up and punch Samuel square in the jaw. My cousins both gasp, and I storm upstairs to bed.
End Of Flashback
"Ezra?" Aria asks as she shakes me gently.
"Huh?" I ask, snapping out of my daydream.
"I asked you a question, and then you went blank. Is everything alright?" Aria asks with a concerned expression on her face.
"You're not a slave. You know that, don't you?" I ask as I stare into my wife's hazel eyes.
"Why, of course I know that! My skin is as light as a feather, and there is no more slavery. We won the war, remember? Are you falling ill?" Aria asks as he rests a hand over my forehead.
"That's not exactly what I meant." I say with a chuckle
"Oh. What did you mean?" Aria asks me curiously.
I do not need to tell Aria about my cousins, or my encounter with Addie. It would upset her far too much. Besides, Aria does not need to know that she's as powerless as a poor slave girl.
"You are very young, my darling." I say as I run my fingers through her dark hair.
"You say that quite often, Ezra." Aria grumbles.
"That's because it's true." I say before kissing Aria's forehead softly.
Line Break
Honeymoons are actually quite fun. Today Ezra took me around the city, and then we dined with one of his old friends from West Point. His friend had two beautiful little boys, and it reminded me of how badly I want a son. Unfortunately, to make a son, I'll have to invite Ezra into my bed. Tonight is the night.
"Mrs. Aria, you must hold still." Charlotte says as she runs the brush through my thick hair.
"I am sorry, Charlotte. I'm rather excited for tonight." I confess.
"Ah. You're excited for Mr. Ezra to come back to the room." Charlotte says with a chuckle.
"Why, yes. I'm trying to make a baby." I say with a blush.
"A baby? That should not be a problem. You're young and fertile, and I'm sure Mr. Ezra is planting enough seeds in you father a thousand children!" Charlotte exclaims.
Her words cause my cheeks to turn pink. What would Charlotte say if she knew that Ezra hasn't planted a single seed in me? She'd probably yell at me for refusing him yesterday night. What happens between Ezra and myself is none of her business.
"I presume you like Mr. Ezra? You've only been married for a day and a half, and you already seem so much happier than you were at home." Charlotte tells me thoughtfully.
Do I like Ezra? He is so kind and agreeable, and that makes it so difficult to hate him. It frustrates me a great deal because I know have to find a way to hate him. If I don't find a way to hate him, there is a good chance I'll start to love him. If I fall in love with him, I'll get hurt just like Momma did.
But what if... Ezra is different than Daddy? Maybe his kindness isn't an act, and he truly does care about me. No! I've been reading far too many romance novels. Men in real life aren't like the ones in the books. Men, especially men like Ezra, are out for themselves. I must not forget this.
"Ezra is fine." I mutter as I avoid looking into Charlotte's eyes.
"Mrs. Aria, that is not the correct answer. If someone asks you about Mr. Ezra, you are to tell them that he's perfect in every way. Are we clear?" Charlotte asks as she begins to raise her voice.
"That is enough for tonight, Charlotte. Please leave me." I say as I cross my arms over my chest.
"Remember your place in this world, Aria." Charlotte mutters before springing to her feet, and storming out of the bedroom.
I sigh before climbing into bed, and resting my head against the soft pillow. Ezra will be here any minute. I wonder if it will be as scary tonight as it was last night. I hope I do not chicken out again. Surely that would upset Ezra very much.
"Aria?" Ezra calls out as he enters the small room.
"I am here, love." I say, trying not to gag when I say the last word.
Ezra doesn't respond. Instead he takes off his boots, before getting into bed with me. Unlike last night, Ezra doesn't kiss me right away. Instead, he pushes my long hair behind my ear, and stares into my hazel eyes.
"How are you feeling tonight, sweetheart?" Ezra asks me gently.
"Very well. Much better than I felt last night." I say, hoping he'll get the message.
"I am pleased to hear that." Ezra whispers before pressing his lips against mine.
Tonight, his kissing is gentle. The kissing feels much different than it did last night, when he practically shoved his tongue down my throat. A startled gasp escapes from my lips when Ezra breaks the kiss, and tenderly strokes my cheek.
"Good night, my darling." Ezra whispers before springing to his feet, and walking over to the couch.
I am far too stunned to speak. Did Ezra just reject me? I did not order him to stop. He just did it on his own. Perhaps he thinks I am not ready? I probably am not, but I am willing to make sacrifices so that I might bear a son. Does Ezra not know that I want children?
"Ezra, why aren't you in bed with me?" I ask him softly.
"Because you need space." Ezra replies.
"But I am your wife..." I start to ramble.
"No, Aria. You are a human being before you are my wife." Ezra says as he shakes his head slowly.
"I don't understand." I say with confusion in my voice.
Ezra responds by getting off the couch, and taking a seat at the foot of the bed. He takes both of my hands, and stares directly into my hazel eyes.
"Aria, did your father tell you about what happened to me during the war?" Ezra asks me curiously.
"Why yes. You were captured during a battle, and the Rebels held you in one of their prison camps." I say with an involuntary shutter.
"What your father told you is the truth. I had to spend an entire year in that prison camp, and it was terrible. Aria, I know what it's like to be a slave, and I never want you to feel like I did when I was locked up." Ezra says as his tone turns serious.
"Why would I feel that way?" I ask as I furrow my brow in confusion.
"Aria, I know what women your age are taught. That you're property, and that you have to obey your husband. Well, you don't have to obey me if you don't want to. As far as I am concerned, we are equals. You are not mine to control. Do you understand now, Aria?" Ezra asks me gently.
For some reason, his words cause me to burst into tears. This is the kind of man I've been dreaming of. Someone who will value me, and see me for who I truly am. Ezra would be perfect... If he wasn't Ezra.
This kindness must be a phase. He'll continue to work with the military, while I stay home and mother his offspring. Surely we could never be equals. He'll realize this, and lose the respect he has for me. And that's when the beatings will start...
"Honey, what ever is the matter?" Ezra asks as wraps his arms around me.
"You make it so difficult for me to hate you." I mutter under my breath.
"Can you repeat that, Aria?" Ezra asks me gently.
"You're such a gentleman, Ezra." I say, trying to cover what I said before.
Ezra looks at me like I'm crazy, but does not question me anymore. Instead, he holds me in his arms, and cradles me like I'm a little baby. For the first time since Momma died, I feel safe. Like nothing bad will happen to me while I'm with Ezra.
No! This is a false sense of security. Falling in love with Ezra would destroy me. When Momma fell in love with Daddy, it destroyed her. I promised Momma I wouldn't marry a general, but I did. I can't let her down again by becoming too trusting of Ezra. I have to keep my distance.
"Ezra, I am feeling rather tired tonight." I say as I pull away from my husband.
"I understand, sweetheart. I'll be on the couch if you need anything. Do not hesitate to call for me." Ezra says before kissing my forehead one last time, and leaving me alone in the large bed.
Author's Note: What did you think of this chapter? Did you like Ezra's flashback? Do you think Aria is starting to open up to him, or is she keeping her distance? Please review and tell me your thoughts!
How many of you have read my story, "The Room?" I have a great idea for a short sequel, and I was wondering if anyone would be interested in reading it? Should I start writing or do you like the ending as it is?