So once again, of the 24 or so people reading this story only one reviewed. This makes me very sad. I know you guys are busy and all but please leave me something. Speaking of the one reviewer, thank you so very much. Your words mean everything. I'm glad you took the time to leave it.

Chapter 33: Angry?

Mandy woke next there was a dark haired girl in the chair at her bedside. "Tiff?" Mandy asked. Of course she recognized the girl; she just wondered why she was there.

"Hi," Tiff answered. "No, I didn't come up here to see the baby but he is cute. If Madame P. asks, I came to give you homework."

Mandy sat up a bit looking at her friend and hoping she didn't look angry. "What are you really doing here, Tiff? Not that I'm not pleased to see you or anything, but honestly, I wasn't expecting you." Tiff scrutinized Mandy but she looked mostly curious.

"I wanted to talk to you. Honestly, your brother wanted to and should be here, but he's dealing with some third years and told me to go ahead with it."

"Why would—should he ...?" Mandy trailed off thinking it over. "You're dating my brother. You've been hiding it all year too, right?"

"I explained why I couldn't tell you."

"His position putting you in danger. Yeah, you mentioned that, but he's a teacher."

"Only because his boss said he had become useless as an Auror after your parents died last year. He wasn't focused and he kept putting himself at risk. Almost like he had a death wish or something. This was so he could get himself straightened out."

Mandy stared up at the ceiling, taking in everything Tiff had told her. "Okay. You're dating my brother. Okay," Mandy said almost talking to herself instead of Tiff. "Just try not to break his heart." Mandy finally looked at her friend.

"No one ever sets out to—I'm not trying to do that." Tiff realized that's exactly what Mandy had done to Sirius.

"Good. I love my brother, Tiff, and I don't want to see him hurt anymore if he doesn't have to be," Mandy said.

"No, I understand."

"I'm still kinda tired, Tiff, do you mind if I got some more sleep?"

"Not at all, we'll talk more later." Tiff gave her a soft smile then got up and left.

Mandy once again mulled over the thoughts in her head instead of going back to sleep. It wasn't that bad that Tiff was dating Jason. Mandy thought back over the year trying to figure out when the relationship had started. She could remember how back in November, Jason said he had been flirting with a witch that he didn't want her to see at the Halloween Ball. Then in January, Mandy remembered, after Lily's birthday party, Lily had mentioned Tiff having a boyfriend that was tall, dark, and handsome plus a few years older. After that the only time Mandy remembered Jason talking about his girlfriend was in March when Mandy had asked about love and Jason had told her about his new girl. Though he hadn't wanted to talk about her, he had said that he could love her even if it wasn't the same kind of love he had felt for his previous girlfriend. That what he had felt this time around, was like coming in from the snow and it made him feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. If they had been together at least that long then perhaps them being together wasn't such a bad thing. Maybe it was time to do what her mother had told her two months ago: step back and see if she really was angry. After doing so, and realizing she wasn't, Mandy decided to stay out of the matter and do her best to be happy for the couple.

Just as she had come to this conclusion, Sirius entered, his face lighting up when he saw her sitting up and looking at him. Then he spotted the contemplative look on her face. "Are you all right?"

"You ever notice that more people ask you if you're alright when you're not than when you actually are?" Sirius shook his head. "My brother is dating a girl nine years younger than he is."

"Someone you know?" Sirius asked, dropping into the chair next to her bed as he remembered the age difference between the two siblings.

"Tiff."

That one worded sentence. That was all it took to shake Sirius's world. He had always known that Tiffany Lay was a special sort of girl, he could see it from the day that he had decided to go after her, and he wanted nothing but the best for her, but he had always wondered when this would come out and what it would do to Mandy. The two girls weren't especially close, Tiff preferred Shelly's more fun and somewhat shy personality to Mandy's often brash and temperamental one, but the two girls got on well enough that this could really hurt Mandy. Especially since Mandy never took it well when she found out she had been lied to. "Oh," Sirius finally answered. He swallowed and studied her carefully. "Is this a bad thing?"

"Not necessarily. I mean ..." Mandy took a deep breath. "I love my brother and he deserves to be happy after his last girl, but I'm not sure how I feel about my brother and my friend. I said—I promised myself that I would do my best to stay out of it and be happy for them but honestly, I'm concerned." It wasn't really a bad thing. Her concern was mainly so her brother didn't get hurt.

"Just remind yourself that they're grown adults and then you wish them the best and stay out of it," Sirius said wisely.

"Is that what you would do?"

"It's what works for James."

"Did you talk to him? About marrying me?"

"Yes; he had all kinds of questions but eventually he said yes."

"I—" Mandy swallowed hard hoping he wasn't about to take this the wrong way. "I meant James. Did you talk to him?"

"That's what I meant too." Sirius nodded keeping his face calm and watching her.

"If he hadn't said yes, would you still ask me?"

"Not until I proved it to him."

"You think I would turn you down if James told you it wasn't alright?"

"I think you care deeply about his opinion and you trust him so much that if he said no, you'd worry about doing what he wasn't okay with. Remember at the start of the year when James wasn't okay with us dating? It was hard on you. Since marriage is a bigger step it'd be ten times harder on you and I couldn't do that to either of you."

"What do you think he'd do?"

"I don't know. I know if he said it wasn't okay but I asked you and you said yes anyway there's a chance he'd keep out of it, but on the other hand there's a chance he'd get in your ear and I'd lose you for good."

"You actually think I'd listen to him?"

"It doesn't matter," Sirius smiled, "because he said yes and I have proven myself to him."

"I see."

"You can ask him if you don't believe me." When Mandy didn't say anything he took that to mean she did believe him. "I also wrote your dad—your father. He too was okay with me asking you."

"You wrote my father?" Mandy asked shocked

"I did. I figured you'd appreciate it. Just like I talked to Jason who approved but also told me I should talk to James."

It hit Mandy at that very moment exactly what they were talking about. Marriage. Settling down. Things old people—adults did. She was a kid. A kid with her whole life in front of her. Her chest started to tighten as panic set in. Thankfully she remembered some of the ways Jason had taught her to clear her mind and calm down. Using those methods she held it together until Sirius excused himself to go get dinner. Once he was out of the room she went into full panic attack mode; quickened breath, eyes screwed shut, and her thoughts racing all over the place. She couldn't do this. She needed something. She didn't know what that something was, just that she needed it to calm herself down. Nothing she tried to distract her mind was working so she slipped from the bed and walked to the cot slowly but steadily. She stopped next to the beautiful white cot and looked down and saw the little boy looking around and cooing to himself. Next to him sat a small stuffed puppy but she had no idea where it had come from. Mandy reached down and the boy latched onto her finger pulling it towards his mouth. Mandy remembered from the book she read that's how babies explored the world. She smiled, her sudden panic gone.

"You feel sad," a voice said behind her. She didn't have to look back to see James there. Of course he would be. Either he had felt her panic and had come to check on her or Sirius had told her she was up. She heard a soft pop and figured it was Chris dropping off her dinner.

"Not sad, scared." Mandy corrected.

"Of what?" James asked. Even just by his voice she could tell he was more curious than actually judging her. He may judge her deep inside but he'd never say or portray it. Not when she could read him so well.

Mandy pulled her finger from her son's grip and then stroked the top of his head. The cap they had placed on his head after his birth to keep him warm had only lasted twenty minutes before he had pulled it off and thrown it. Every time they had tried to put it back on he'd scream and shake his head so the healers finally left it off. As she stroked back his dark brown hair she tried to come up with the words to express her feelings. "Of a lot of things I guess. I know I'm not the type that usually scares easily but part me is scared that I'll never bond with Sirius the way I have with you."

"You won't," James said simply. Mandy spun around and stared at him in shock. "You will never have the same relationship or bond with Sirius that you have with me."

"But—"

"Mandy, even if you share everything with him and become super close, he can't have the same kind of bond we do. Just like I'll never share that with Lily. It's because you love us, and I love you two, in completely different ways. You may come to trust him and believe in him but at the same time he will not share our bond." James readjusted his glasses then looked away from her.

Mandy walked away from the cot and sat back down on the bed, next to James. She picked up the plate off the table knowing Chris had left it there for her to eat dinner, and began to slowly eat the meatloaf and potatoes. She had finished most of her potatoes when she looked at him. "He was sitting in that chair," Mandy jerked her head to the chair on the far side of the bed behind them, "earlier, and I was lying in the bed. We were talking about getting married. About how he had talked to you and Jason and Pat, and how they all agreed that he could ask and I suddenly realized how scared I was but instead of telling him, I just held it inside. Getting married and settling down, that what old people do. I'm just a kid. I shouldn't be thinking about things like that."

"Do you know why you couldn't tell him?" James asked, twiddling his thumbs.

"No."

"You do, think about it. Deep down you know exactly why you can't tell him."

Mandy stared at her plate. "No, James, I don't."

"You do. You want him to see you as this strong, confident, powerful witch who can take care of herself and telling him you're scared doesn't fit into that."

"I'm just a kid, James. This was supposed to be the best year ever. You'd finally get with Lily and I'd have the perfect boyfriend and the most we'd worry about would be N.E.W.T.s at the end of the year. Now—I don't know."

"Breath, Mandy. It's going to be okay. Sirius doesn't expect you to rush into everything or anything for that matter. If you don't want to get married right away then he'll take it slow."

"You sure?" Fear flickered in her eyes and he knew he had to do everything in his power to calm her down.

"Yes, and have this conversation with him. He'll always see you as this strong woman but he'll know that you have a softer side and that'll go a long way to improving your relationship. Have you heard back from the adopters?" Changing the subject seemed to work.

"Not yet. I've been sleeping since you guys left then Tiff came in, then Sirius, then you."

"Miss Hunter, I'm glad to see you up and eating." Mandy and James both turned to see Madam Pomfrey enter the room with a letter in her hands. "You slept through lunch. It's important you get your stamina back up so you can get caught up and take your N.E.W.T.s this summer. Of course, Mr. Potter, I expected you here too. I've got news. I just heard back from the Weavers. They are searching for houses in the States and won't be back until the 12th," Pomfrey said.

"So essentially my son will spend the first two weeks of his life growing up in a store cupboard?" Mandy asked.

"Miss Hunter, they deep apologize, but they want to have things finalized in the States before they come to retrieve him."

"Mandy, it's two weeks. I think he'll be okay and won't even remember it," James told her.

"You remind yourself of that when your son grows up in a cupboard."

"Two weeks, deep breath. Besides for a cupboard this is pretty big."

"I guess you're right. Madam, when can I leave? I know you want me to take it easy."

"I would like for you to stay here until tomorrow just to be safe and I don't want you back in classes until next week," Pomfrey answered.

"Yes, Ma'am," Mandy answered. Madam Pomfrey left the pair alone and Mandy turned back to James. "So back in classes next week and I'm not going to understand a thing."

"Well then during our free periods and this weekend we will get you all caught up on everything," James promised.

"Thanks, James."

"Anything else you want to talk about?"

"No, I don't think so. How do you think I can learn to talk to him the way I talk to you?"

"It's going to take time. Maybe just opening up to him a time or two. Start small. The nightmare was a good start. Give him a chance. Oh, there's a Hogsmeade visit next weekend."

"I know. You and Lily want to meet me and Sirius some time?"

"Uh, Lily and I aren't going to be there. She got a letter a few weeks ago. Her sister is getting married and wanted Lily to meet with her and her fiancé. Dumbledore has approved and Lily asked me to go with her."

"Are you going to ask her dad about marrying her?"

"Do you think I should?"

"I don't think it'll be a deal breaker if you don't ask her dad but you might want to anyway."

James nodded as Mandy put her plate back on the table. They sat there in the quiet for a while both relishing in it. It had been a while since they had been together like this. In fact it had been a while since it had just been Mandy and James. Usually he was too busy rushing around being Head Boy and with Lily and she was with Sirius. She mentioned that fact and James just smiled and wrapped an around her tightly, kissing the top of her head.

To be honest James missed the time they usually spent together too. He had felt her panic and sadness earlier but the panic felt like a lesser degree than the sadness. The longer he spoke with her the more he realized she wasn't sad at all. The more he sat with her, the closer he felt to her. It was almost like they were bonding just by being together without saying anything.

"Was it your idea for Sirius to talk to my father about marrying me?" Mandy asked, lacing their fingers together.

"No. I just expected him to prove to me how much he loved you. I didn't know he owled your father until we were halfway through our conversation. That boy really loves you."

"I love him too. I just wish I could tell him. Part of me is scared of telling him but another part of it is like he doesn't want me to say it to him."

"What do you mean "doesn't want you to say it"?" James looked at Mandy confused.

"I don't know." Mandy scratched her head then told him about the time in the hallway a few months back.

James saw the look in Mandy's eyes and cupped her cheek. "Calm down, Stripes. Stop staring at me like that. I'm not going to hurt you and I would never judge you or her. Ever," James told her. Mandy stared at him. "I'm not talking to you, Mandy. Stripes, please."

The voice that came out of Mandy's mouth didn't sound one bit like her own. "She trusts you, but you have a long way to go to earn my trust. You break her heart, human, and I will destroy you." Stripes answered James.

Mandy shook her head and fought down the tiger. "I'm sorry; I have no idea where she's coming from."

"Don't apologize. She doesn't trust me and I understand it. Remus trusted me long before Moony did. It'll take time. Don't worry."

Mandy nodded and leaned into his comforting touch. Both Sirius and Lily had been watching the exchange from the doorway and Lily had to pull Sirius back away from the door seeing the fury in his eyes. "What are you going to do? You can't go bursting in there," Lily whispered, hoping neither James nor Mandy could hear them.

"That doesn't mean I can sit here and take that. She's my girlfriend. You can't tell me that you're okay with all of that," Sirius snapped, jabbing his wand towards the door. She knew he had put up some kind of sound dampening charm.

"No, but if it gets James back to the boy I used to know, the one that laughed as honestly as a child at times then yes, I swallow my pride and not say anything. You and I both know that the people we love are closer than we will ever be to them. We knew that going in Sirius and we have to accept that. They need each other as much as we need them and we can't ask them to stop. Do you really want to try?" Lily asked.

"I—" Sirius stopped and ran both hands through his hair frustrated. Then he shook his head causing his hair to fall back into place. "I want her happy. I don't like that he makes her happier than I can but I haven't seen her happy in so long. Either of them. I want to see that light back in their eyes."

"Then we accept that there are going to be moments like this. Those private jokes and comforting looks that only they share. Why don't you and I go back to the Common Room? Forget this ever happened and get to know each other better. Our other halves are close so we should at least be friends," Lily said, loosening her grip on Sirius's arm. Sirius thought it over then nodded.

"I never knew you saw that. I'm sorry," Mandy said, looking at her husband as he gripped her hand.

"I didn't want you to. I told James about it later and he felt terrible. I couldn't do that to you too. I felt bad for telling James. I was so—" Sirius stopped and swallowed. He wasn't sure he wanted to bring it up or let his kids and godchild know exactly how he was feeling. Finally he decided it would be okay. "I was insecure about that time in my life. I didn't want you to leave me like so many others did."

"James was no threat to you. I loved you and I knew, like I've always known since I was 12 years old, James and I do not fit together romantically. Have you ever put together a puzzle?" Mandy asked, looking around the room at everyone. Most of them nodded. "You ever get those pieces that look like they go together? The ones that fit together but the closer you get to the end of the puzzle you realize they don't fit completely." Again more nodding. "That's how me and James were. We almost fit together in every way but we didn't."

"When did you stop running to my dad and trust Sirius completely?" Harry asked.

"Summer, 1994," Mandy answered simply.

Harry shook his head and stood up. "Harry, listen to me. Your dad was fantastic with her. He did amazing things that I couldn't understand. I'm still not sure I do. I got over my jealousy and fear after we married but it wasn't until she lost that lifeline that our relationship became true, solid, and unshakeable." Sirius explained. Sirius let go of Mandy's hand and crossed the room to his godson. "Tell me, does Hermione still tell you more than she tells Ron?"

Harry thought about it. "Yes," he answered softly.

"Why?"

Harry swallowed suddenly realizing why Sirius was asking. "Because there are things Ron doesn't understand. Things I'll just get. I'm sorry, Mandy."

"That's my Cub," Mandy smiled.

Thanks to all of you for reading. Please, please leave me something in the box below. Also yes I know it's kinda irritating to keep seeing James and Mandy really close and Lily and Sirius being upset over it but Lily explains it in the chapter.