Chapter 20
James followed the clerk into the operations room and leaned over a computer screen which was streaming a live news broadcast. An aerial shot from a helicopter showed a dual carriageway littered with abandoned vehicles which then cut to a reporter at ground level standing behind police incident tap stretched across, presumably, the same road. He was speaking into a microphone and James turned the volume up to catch what he was saying
"...police are not confirming these reports but mobile phone images we have obtained suggest that the assailants stopped vehicles, pulled drivers and passengers from their seats and used their bare hands and teeth to attack them on the roadside"
The report cut to a series of grainy images showing a group of figures grappling with a man by a family saloon. One of the figures had turned to the camera and the screen zoomed in on the telltale red eyes and mucus covered mouth.
"My god!" Exclaimed James then turning to the clerk. "Get me division on the phone"
The reporter was back on screen:
"Police have offered no explanation as to the appearance of the attackers but witnesses have confirmed that all the men displayed similar characteristics. The whereabouts of the assailants and their victims is not currently known but police have cordoned off a large area around the Valley Ground"
"Valley Ground?" Asked James of the clerk
"Charlton F.C sir, South East London" he responded then "Division Sir"
James grabbed the receiver...
The chinook hovered above the A206 then slowly descended to where a space had been cleared among the abandoned cars and vans. The rear door descended slowly and James strode out at the head of two contingents of SZS.
They were met by a uniformed police commander in a high visibility vest.
"Major James?" Shouted the officer
James nodded and they walked away from the helicopter, coming to a halt on a wide section of pavement bordering the road.
"I'm Commander Richardson, the incident commander. We have closed down a wide area around the crime scene. The suspects came from the direction of the football ground" the officer pointed across the road to the south "accessed the dual carriageway just over there, perpetrated the attack and then escaped with hostages northwards into the retail estate behind us. As far as we can ascertain they are still in there somewhere."
James unfolded a map of the area and studied it for a few seconds.
"Ok commander, can you show me the extent of your cordon".
The officer indicated a large area encompassing the estate and surrounding streets.
James nodded "Very well, I propose to deploy units here and here" James indicated two different parking areas within the estate. If your officers spot the suspects, radio the position and we will come to them. They should not attempt to engage with the hostiles, is that understood?"
The commander answered in the affirmative.
"Once we have completed the operation we will radio in."
James then turned to his men. "Ok, listen in, information suggests these are Mark One hostiles so we can get up close and personal. Lieutenant Ash you will take one section to this area" James indicated a position on the map. "...and deploy the immersion equipment. Just to be safe let's have pickets posted along a 50 metre perimeter, we don't want any Mark Twos taking us by surprise. Radio in when you are ready."
Ash nodded and doubled away with his detail.
James turned to Mansfield Mike "ok Corporal let's get set up" and the remainder of the detail moved off in the opposite direction.
Within fifteen minutes both sections were fully deployed and Mansfield Mike was launching into his greatest hits whilst Private Williams, the section's SHAAt operative, climbed into the pool.
James swept the area with his binoculars, scanning the nearby building line and access roads.
"Any movement Ash?" James asked into his headset
"Nothing yet sir" answered the lieutenant
"Roger that"
Half an hour later there had still been no evidence of any hostiles, and James was just starting to consider shifting position when a movement caught his eye. Raising his binoculars he focussed in on the relevant area and two shuffling figures came into focus.
"Contact right, wait out" he said into his head set.
Mansfield Mike sang on:
"Pussycat, Pussycat, I've got flowers
And lots of hours
To spend with you."
"I've got eyes on sir," called through a picket. "Confirm engage"
"Negative to that Private" ordered James
The figures approached them slowly and resolved into an elderly man and woman, carrying two large shopping bags each and staring down at the ground in front of them. They grunted rhythmically as they walked.
"Confirm Mark Ones. Ready immersion and restraint team" ordered James tensely.
Baz Vegas and three other soldiers approached the pool and stood ready. Private Williams shifted uneasily in the pool.
"Steady men. On my word" said James.
Mansfield Mike belted out the chorus:
"What's new, Pussycat?
Whoa, whoa
What's new, Pussycat?
Whoa, whoa"
The couple were within a few metres of the pool when they came to a stop. The lady then put down her shopping bags and reached into her pocket.
"I have clear sight sir" said a picket
"Wait out" called James
The lady produced a purse and opened it with a loud click, before scrabbling inside and pulling out two coins which she threw into the pool. They entered the solution with a soft plop and sank immediately. She then looked at James and smiled.
"I do love a bit of Tom Jones me" she said "but you're not going to get many punters busking around here today dear. You should try the high street"
She then turned around, picked up her bags and shuffled away, her husband following a few paces behind.
James watched them go then radioed out "stand down, false alarm."
He scanned the retail park one more time then let out a breath "this is hopeless" he said to himself then talked into his headset again. "Lieutenant Ash, let's see if we can't ferret them out. Send a squad to sweep the shop units to the north"
"Yes sir" came the crackling response.
James turned to his detail "Corporal, Smurf, with me. Bas Vegas stay here and keep trying."
The small group of soldiers made for a nearby row of industrial units. As James reached the first one he tried the door and pulled on the adjacent roller shutter finding them locked. He signalled for the others to do the same and they worked down the row of units with the same result, all were shut up tight with no sign of activity.
They were about to move on when a scream pierced the quiet afternoon, followed by another. "Over there" said James and doubled over to the last unit they had checked.
"Ok let's get it open" he ordered and Smurf brought his rifle but down on the door handle, knocking it out of shape and splintering the wood around it. Another scream, followed by a long moan prompted James to stride over and finish the job with a powerful kick. The lock gave way and the door crashed open. James then barged in to the room beyond closely followed by his men.
James stopped dead at the sight which met his eyes. The room had some scattered pieced of heavy, dark wooden furniture draped with rich fabric which spilled in luxurious folds across the floor. These intermingled with deep fur rugs arranged layer on layer in the central space whilst plump, soft cushions with a stag motif were scattered here and there.
In the middle of this scene stood a tall muscular man, naked but for a long, fur trimmed cloak which cascaded from his broad shoulders and spread behind him in a regal train. But most striking of all was the nude woman who nestled against his chest, arms flung around the man's neck and legs wrapped around his powerful oiled torso.
As James watched, the woman arched her back and let out another scream followed by the deep moaning noise they had heard from outside. James advanced further into the room "British Army, nobody move!" He said at which point the woman twisted around in surprise, lost her grip and started to fall backwards with a despairing cry.
James ran forward and caught her in his arms then placed her gently on the fur rug.
A voice shouted from the shadows:
"Cut, cut, cut! Ok who ordered the soldiers? I thought we had the guy in the gorilla suit coming in next? "
A small fat man advanced into the middle of the room sporting a loud Hawaiian shirt and a black beret.
"Right everybody, take five. Someone get that poor girl a robe and let's have the fluffer in, this guy's ledge is starting to recede"
James stared at the man. "What the hell is going on here?"He said.
"What is going on here is the creation of high art for a very specialist..." The man tailed off and starred at James "oh my god, what did you just do with your tongue! Chris come out here and have a look at this."
Chris emerged from the shadows and removed a set of earphones.
"There, did you see that Chris?"
"I did, I haven't seen that kind of tongue action since Dick 'the lick' Johnson retired. Young man you could make a fortune in this business"
James stared at the two men in utter confusion "we need to know if you have seen any zombies around here"
Chris looked at his colleague and sucked in a breath. "Loads here last week when we were filming 'Night of the Wanking Dead' but none since then I think..."
James nodded, "well thank you for your time gentlemen. We will let you get on with your ummm work"
"You could try the Cabaret Club" suggested the Hawaiian shirt. "They might have seen something"
"The Cabaret Club?" Said James...
The soldiers walked down a side road following the directions provided to them.
"Sir" said Mansfield Mike "I never knew they did porn movies anymore. Thought the whole business had fallen through cos of the internet"
"Really private, you seem to know a lot about it" said James
"Well sir, they say that 87% of young men use the internet for porn, so what does that tell you?" Replied the Corporal.
"Tells me that 13% of young men are liars" replied James "...here we are"
They approached a solid looking black door set in the side of a warehouse. Mansfield Mike knocked and a small hatch opened to reveal a pair of suspicious eyes. "British Army" said James
"Oh thank goodness" said the owner of the eyes and opened the door hurriedly. "We have been trying to get hold of you. Follow me"
The man led them through a dimly lit corridor and out into a back stage area. "They are through there" he said, indicating a curtained doorway.
"How many of them are there?" Asked James
"Four" said the man.
"Ok" said James biting his lip then turning to his men "we will need to use the wands I think". They all drew one from their belts and advanced through the curtain.
On the other side they were blinded by a bright light which made them all cover their eyes. This was followed by a chorus of wolf whistles and cheers from beyond the lights which gave way to loud music.
To his right James made out four figures stood in a line also facing the lights. There seemed to be a policeman, a builder, a biker and a man with a cowboy hat on.
James crouched waiting for an attach but instead the men remained facing the same way. Suddenly the four started to sing along to the music whilst pointing rhythmically in front of them.
"Young man, there's no need to feel down.
I said, young man, pick yourself off the ground."
Mansfield Mike shouted in James ear "don't think they're zombies sir"
"Indeed. Let's get out of here." Responded James
They retreated back through the curtain where James walked into a figure clad in a magnificent costume made entirely of huge black feathers.
"Whoops-a-daisy" said a familiar voice. "James, Smurf, Mansfield? What in all that is holy are you doing here?"
"Its a long story Jonathan" said James smiling at his former Major
"Oh god, you're not part of that awful Village People tribute band are you?"
"No, we are actually on operational duty" said James
"What, zombies here? Mind you, I have seen stranger things, especially on open mic night"
"They are somewhere in the area, we just need to track them down" confirmed James
"Well I've seen nothing unusual" said Beck "but if anyone can attract them you can dear. You could make a vegetarian crave a good meaty sausage...Now I must get ready, it's a tough crowd out there and I have to be at my best"
"You sing here?" Queried James
"Oh every now and again. Little hobby of mine. Now toodle pip!" And Beck swept past them and through the curtained doorway where he was met by huge applause.
"Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl
With yellow feathers in her hair and a dress cut down to there.."
James smiled and led his men out of the club and back into the street.
He activated his radio "Ash, anything to report?"
"No sir, nothing from our sweep" responded the lieutenant.
"Roger that. Let's rendezvous back at the immersion tanks"
The three soldiers started to walk back to the car park when a large covered truck appeared out of a side road and sped away. James followed it curiously as it drove into the distance and disappeared around a corner.
"What do you think that was all about?" Said James
"Probably that tribute band making a quick getaway " said Mansfield Mike
"Yes maybe" mused James...
"We are calling the search off for the night" said Commander Richardson.
James and his men stood in a group near the edge of the police cordon, exhausted and demoralised after hours of fruitless sweeps across the area.
"Its clear that the suspects have evaded you." Said the officer sourly.
"I can only hope that the hostages do not suffer as a result"
James held his peace. He was at a loss to explain their inability to attract the zombies. Something wasn't right but he couldn't explain what. The only thing that was clear was that the SZS had failed and that there would be consequences...